“What are your plans?”
Yang Lei asked Hua Mao. Fang Yu had invited Hua Mao to stay at the company, but Hua Mao didn’t stay.
“Going back to Jiangbei.” Hua Mao’s original arcades had already been changed into Internet cafes, and brothers under his leadership were running them.
“You’ll continue being a gangster?”
“I’m just a gangster. That’s what I do.”
Hua Mao was the one who stayed in gangdom the longest out of all these gangsters. Later, he took his brothers and continued fighting in Jiangbei. His achievements were still often relayed to Fang Yu and Yang Lei.
Before Hua Mao drank until he was unconscious, he said a final sober word to Yang Lei. Hua Mao said, “Yang Lei, you fucker, you must live a long time. Do you hear me…?”
That day, everyone was drunk. Very drunk.
These big- and small-time gangsters who once dominated Jianghai in the past had experienced youth, turbulence, joys and sorrows, and separation and reunion. They had experienced settling down in their own lives, and they collectively bid farewell to the bloody years of glory.
Later, when the Jianghai gangdom mentioned that day, someone said a phrase: the gangsters of the 90s had ended.
The era of pure impulsiveness, the era of friendship and passion, had ended.
Yan Ziyi, Luo Jiu, Fan Yu, Yang Lei. These legends of Jianghu, these Jianghu bosses and gold class fighters who once shocked and shook up Jianghai throughout the eighties and nineties, had ended their era and ended that era. The gangdom in Jianghai was still going on, and there were still new people and new things happening, but these names and their deeds of the past were still spoken about enthusiastically by people later and often mentioned like legends. Of course, when they excitedly recounted to people later, “Think about what so-and-so did back then,” the main characters of these events were already far away from Jianghu.
When Yang Lei pushed open the iron gate, the courtyard was in full bloom.
Fang Yu followed him in through the iron gate and looked up at the small building, which looked the same as the first time he came here.
Both of them were in no hurry to go inside. They just stood like that between the grass and flowers, smiling at each other.
No matter what happened outside, it seemed like only in this quiet courtyard, time had never passed. Everything was still the same as before.
Aunt Zhang saw Fang Yu, whom she hadn’t seen in many years, and was very happy. Fang Yu calling her godmother made her smile widely. She still remembered Fang Yu, often telling Yang Lei that this godson had no conscience and never came back to visit her. Aunt Zhang didn’t know about Fang Yu’s matters, and Yang Lei only told her that he moved out of town. The elders in the small building were all there, and they all remembered Fang Yu. At noon that day, the families happily sat down to eat together again, marveling that time passed quickly, and it was rare that everyone could still gather together.
Aunt Zhang kept helping Yang Lei and Fang Yu to the dishes. She rarely even saw Yang Lei, let alone Fang Yu. In recent years, other than New Year or other holidays when Yang Lei would come to see them, he had only come a handful of other times. Even if he came, he would only sit for a while and then leave. He rarely spent the night, as if he were hiding from the small building and the courtyard. Aunt Zhang couldn’t help but nag at Yang Lei and Fang Yu.
“Now that he has returned to Jianghai, he has time to show filial piety,” Yang Lei said to Aunt Zhang with a smile.
“You’re really not leaving?” Aunt Zhang was happy.
“I’m not leaving.” Fang Yu smiled and held Yang Lei’s hand that had reached under the table.
In the afternoon, the garden was perfectly sunny. It was the season when the wisteria flowers blossomed, with verdant green and purple blossoms. The two of them leaned against the flower rack, looking at the singing birds, fragrant flowers, and swaying tree shadows around them.
“Do you remember? That time, you sat here and played the guitar.”
Yang Lei remembered that day, when he opened the iron gate, he saw the figure playing guitar under the wisteria flower rack. After many years, that scene was still as vivid as yesterday.
“Know what I was thinking then?”
Yang Lei glanced at Fang Yu.
“What were you thinking?”
“I really wanted to kiss you. Kiss you to death.”
Yang Lei looked into Fang Yu’s eyes. He wasn’t joking.
Fang Yu looked at him with a faint smile. Yang Lei looked at his expression closely. He had lost his heart and soul to this expression.
“Then you kissed someone else here?” Fang Yu raised his eyebrows.
“Fuck… Have you been jealous until now?” Yang Lei smiled. He remembered that night he had poured out all of his anguish to Fang Mei under the flower rack and the farewell kiss that he had given Fang Mei.
After Yang Lei returned to Jianghai, he went to see Fang Mei.
“I told my family that it was I who moved on and dumped you. They scolded me and said that they saw signs long ago. Otherwise, why would Peng Ming revolve around me all day, but I not chase him away?” Fang Mei said openly.
When Fang Mei later knew that Fang Yu had gone to the disaster area to save Yang Lei, when Yang Lei told her about the details of Fang Yu’s past seven years, Fang Mei was shocked.
She really didn’t expect that the truth would be like this. She never thought that the love between two men had actually gone through such a profound and painful process. She saw Yang Lei’s sacrifices in this relationship with her own eyes, but she never expected that Fang Yu’s sacrifices could actually also be so shocking to her.
She knew that from now on, she would never have to worry about Yang Lei again.
“What do you have to apologize to me for? From the beginning, I was asking you for help. Now, even if you still want to help me, I wouldn’t agree!”
Fang Mei spoke the truth.
“Don’t worry about my family. As long as I am willing to get married, they will be happy no matter who I marry. Peng Ming has no other ability. He only knows how to please my old man and woman. When my father was in the hospital, he ran around and worked hard. He’s long won their hearts,” Fang Mei said.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“You mean…” Yang Lei understood.
“Qjla obg atf kfvvlcu ofjra.” Mjcu Zfl kjr ragjlutaobgkjgv.
“..Gbfr tf xcbk atja sbe kjca ab qea bc j rtbk?”
“Lf xcbkr.”
“…Ktja ybs lr rlcmfgf, Mjcu Zfl,” Tjcu Ofl rjlv.
“Lf lr delaf cjïnf. Lf’r obbilrt,” Mjcu Zfl rjlv.
“Tbe’gf gfjiis ublcu ab wjggs jcv atfc vlnbgmf?”
“Depends on his performance.” Fang Mei was smiling faintly.
“…” Yang Lei recognized it and understood. Yang Lei laughed, and Fang Mei also laughed.
It was said that the easiest way to move a woman was to stay by her side when she was the most vulnerable.
“Thank you, Fang Mei,” Yang Lei said sincerely.
“Do we still need to say that?”
Fang Mei smiled with emotion, tears of relief glistening in the corners of her eyes.
“Yang Lei, good for you two.”
Fang Mei smiled…
At that moment, Fang Mei finally bid farewell to her first love, her youth, and the emotional memorial she had cherished in the bottom of her heart.
She was a really brave woman. She knew more about love and blessings than anyone else.
“Has Fang Mei left yet?”
Fang Yu asked.
“Yes. Her plane is tomorrow.”
Fang Mei had contacted a hospital for her father abroad. There was a treatment method abroad that was good. She and Peng Ming were taking her father abroad for treatment together.
“She said that during her wedding feast, we shouldn’t dress up too much and steal the bridegroom’s spotlight.”
Yang Lei remembered the words that Fang Mei said when she left.
“Whatever you wear, you’ll steal the spotlight. You shouldn’t wear anything at all.” Fang Yu crossed his arms and leaned against the flower rack, smiling.
“…Fuck, you think I don’t dare? With this figure of mine, am I afraid to be naked?” Yang Lei’s heart felt itchy.
“Only you are this uncivilized. You get naked first!”
Yang Lei smiled wickedly as he went up to touch Fang Yu’s waist. He moved his hand along Fang Yu’s strong waist and sneakily touched it. Fang Yu didn’t stop him, either, allowing him to touch. Yang Lei looked at the sunlight streaming through the branches of the wisteria flowers and falling onto Fang Yu’s face and body. He looked at the brilliant spots of light enveloping Fang Yu, dazzling covering Fang Yu’s eyes that were staring at him and the smile at the corners of his mouth. Yang Lei was lost in thought…
“What are you doing, acting like a hooligan?” Fang Yu pressed down on Yang Lei’s hand that had pulled out his shirt and reached inside, chuckling.
“I am acting like a hooligan with you. What’s wrong?” Yang Lei’s voice was wicked. His hand was still touching his skin.
“You’re quite amazing.”
“I’m used to being amazing, can’t be changed.”
“You’re amazing. Then last night, who was the one who couldn’t continue in the end?” Fang Yu smiled, his voice low by Yang Lei’s ear.
“…Fuck… your fooling around… you think I can’t beat you?!” Yang Lei’s face was hot. While Fang Yu wasn’t paying attention, he pulled and yanked to take off Fang Yu’s open dress shirt. Fang Yu smiled and blocked him, but Yang Lei still forcefully took it off, laughing loudly as he jumped far away.
“Go ahead and be naked!”
Yang Lei waved the shirt. He looked at Fang Yu wearing a tight undershirt, revealing his naked shoulders.
“Showoff. Bring it here!”
Fang Yu looked at Yang Lei and smiled helplessly. He went over to deal with him, but could Yang Lei wait for him to deal with him? He ran very quickly. The two of them ran, one chasing the other, to the back of the small building. Yang Lei heard Fang Yu chasing behind him. He panted and laughed as he surrendered: “Enough, enough…”
Once he turned around, Fang Yu took him into his arms. Fang Yu lowered his head and kissed him on the lips.
Yang Lei grabbed the white dress shirt, encircling Fang Yu’s back…
The green parasol leaves on the trees covered them. Fang Yu leaned against the wall of the small building, hugging Yang Lei against him and kissing him. In the smell of green grass, in the gentle breeze, they kissed, kissing gently, lingering…
After returning from Meng County, Yang Lei was specially approved for leave. He returned with Fang Yu to the house on the eighth floor.
Since this area had not been demolished, the plans had been changed, and a street of delicacies was under construction. In the past, Yang Lei wanted to buy the house, but the landlord wanted to keep it for his son’s marriage and hadn’t sold it. Later, the government said that it would be demolished, so he waited for the demolition compensation and was even more reluctant to sell it. Now, it wasn’t going to be demolished and his situation had changed again. The landlord was in urgent need of money, so he gave in. Yang Lei and Fang Yu planned to buy the house.
Er Hei and the others originally planned to buy a better new house for Fang Yu to live in, but later, they didn’t insist.
It was only later that Er Hei, Lao Liang, and several close friends completely knew everything.
The night they returned to the eighth floor, the two of them stood on the balcony, looking at the city lights.
The balconies around them were already closed. Only their balcony was still open to the night. The night wind blew through their hair, just like many years ago, the many nights when they leaned against each other here.
The shops along the street downstairs had already been replaced several times. New high-rise buildings came up one after the other. The tall tower cranes at the construction site in the distance, the outline of lights in the night, bore the imprints of this era.
The old-fashioned tape recorder was still in its old place. Yang Lei plugged it in.
As the old cassette player’s song sounded, Fang Yu and Yang Lei smiled at each other. Yang Lei took out a cigarette and put it in his mouth, then leaned towards Fang Yu’s burning cigarette.
On the balcony in the night, two sparks were close to each other, and two figures were leaning against each other.
Fang Yu reached out and held Yang Lei close to himself. Yang Lei leaned against his shoulder, exhaled smoke, squinted, and looked down at the whole brilliantly illuminated city…
They went to see Luo Jiu together.
Luo Jiu’s grave was in the cemetery on the outskirts of the city. Over these years, there were always brothers who went to visit him, never leaving him alone. Even under those circumstances back then, Luo Jiu’s funeral was a glorious one, and the man did not suffer any injustice. The two of them burned paper for Luo Jiu, lit incense, and brought news of Luo Wen to him. Once Fang Yu was released from prison, he inquired about Luo Wen’s situation. Fang Yu’s classmate had been taking care of Luo Wen all along. Luo Wen was already married abroad, living a peaceful life. God had treated the unfortunate girl well and gave her a good home.
Fang Yu sat in front of the grave for a long time, and Yang Lei accompanied him.
That night after returning, Fang Yu said many things about the past with Luo Jiu. Fang Yu said that he had promised Luo Jiu in the past that if he got married someday, no matter where he was, he would bring them back for him to see.
“Jiu Ge didn’t get to see this person, but he won’t blame you,” Yang Lei said.
“He saw today,” Fang Yu said.
Yang Lei turned his head and looked at Fang Yu. He suddenly turned over and hugged him…
Yang Lei received a call from Yang Datian.
Yang Datian didn’t say anything more. He only sighed and said to Yang Lei: “Your father is old too. Once you’re old, you can’t be sure. If you can go back and visit, then visit…”
Yang Lei thought that maybe later, though he didn’t know when, perhaps he would ultimately go back with Fang Yu.
But that was later, not now.
The most difficult thing in the world was to forgive.
Later, Yang Lei did it.
Fang Yu had said, “Without him, I couldn’t have been sentenced to just a few years back then.”
Fang Yu said, “I was imprisoned for several years and came out. I can stand upright. I don’t have any regrets.”
“From the beginning, it was my own free will.”
Fang Yu said, “He is your father. Because of me, there shouldn’t be one less person in the world who wholeheartedly wants good for you.”
One Sunday, they passed by the lab high school.
The lab high school was still the same as before. The standardized field still had high steps on both sides.
The two of them sat on the steps, at the old place where Yang Lei had sat playing the guitar back then.
“I didn’t bring the guitar. Otherwise, I’d play it again,” Yang Lei said.
That guitar was always in the house on the eighth floor, put away.
“Do you still know how to play?” Fang Yu asked.
“I really forgot.”
After Fang Yu was imprisoned, Yang Lei never touched the guitar again.
“Teach me again.”
Yang Lei looked at Fang Yu.
Several girls playing volleyball hit the ball far away. The ball fell next to Fang Yu and Yang Lei. Yang Lei lifted his hand and caught the ball.
“That… Can you throw the ball over here?”
Several girls looked at Fang Yu and Yang Lei, blushing.
Yang Lei threw the ball, accurately throwing it into a girl’s arms. The girls walked far away and were still stealthily looking this way.
“That little girl looks like Ying-zi,” Yang Lei said.
When Ying-zi had pursued Fang Yu in the past, Yang Lei knew her. At that time, Ying-zi was about the same age as these girls.
Fang Yu had told Yang Lei all about the process of how Fang Yu had asked Ying-zi for help. Yang Lei knew that the person Fang Yu felt most indebted to in his heart was Ying-zi.
“Her child is already two years old,” Fang Yu said.
Now, Ying-zi had long started a family in the south. She had someone who loved her dearly, and she understood what a woman’s real happiness was.
After Fang Yu got out of prison, he had called Ying-zi. Ying-zi’s son had sweetly called him “Uncle” over the phone.
“He’s naughty, just like his father,” Ying-zi said with a laugh over the phone.
“Yu Ge, I’m very grateful to you. If I didn’t come here, I wouldn’t be able to marry this person,” Ying-zi said…
Yang Lei and Fang Yu had both met very good women. They were grateful and indebted to them. They were all passersby in life, but they had left important colors for them.
There was a song playing over the loudspeakers of the field, and the melody was drifting.
“‘Love Song 2000.’ It’s also Luo Dayou’s. Have you heard it?”
Yang Lei listened and looked at the people playing ball and having fun on the field under the sunlight.
“I have. 90 is still better,” Yang Lei said.
“You sing better than he does.”
Fang Yu was stunned. He laughed and smoked his cigarette.
“Bullshit.”
The sunlight shone on the field, warm. There were people flying kites on the field, and a flock of pigeons flew across the sky.
“Back then, were you doing it on purpose?”
Yang Lei looked at the opposite side. A long time ago, that was the place where the guitarist on the other side sat.
“Didn’t you say that you don’t have to talk to know what the guitarist on the other side was thinking?”
Fang Yu remembered the circumstances when Yang Lei told him happily that he and that brother were Qu Yang and Liu Zhengfeng.
“Then what was he thinking about then?”
Yang Lei looked at Fang Yu.
Fang Yu squinted his eyes, lifting the corners of his mouth.
“He was thinking, this foolish boy, if I don’t tease you, who should I tease?”
Fang Yu smoked and laughed.
“Fuck… When you bought me a soda, you also intentionally didn’t say anything, right?”
Yang Lei gritted his teeth.
“If I said something, would you give me another role?” Fang Yu said.
“You were just playing with me!”
Yang Lei’s smile under the sunlight spread in all directions.
Fang Yu didn’t reply. He smoked with a smile.
He remembered the distant night back then. The boy was fumbling with a guitar, shouting “Sorry, brother” from afar. He remembered him sitting on this side of the field, looking at him in amusement. He plucked the guitar strings offhandedly and heard the sound of his guitar following along.
He remembered that year, the field on that summer night and that chilly autumn night. That old song, the two people holding guitars were still singing the same song, “Childhood.”
Back then, they were still young.
Back then, they walked to each other’s side.
(The End)
T/N: Thank you to everyone who has made it this far! The extra chapters will be posted starting next week.
Thank you for translating this novel 🥺💕 definitely one of my faves. Looking forward to the extras! Take care~
The ending is so nostalgic. While I am glad their lives have moved on and both Fang Yu and Yang Lei have careers and promising futures, away from gangdom life, I miss their youth. From both initially being straight guys, to realizing their feelings, to being together and separating, and reuniting, it so convincing how deep they came to love each other. I love this pairing (Fang Yu and Yang Lei) so much. I also love the other characters, their DaGes, Hua Mao, Fang Mei, Yang Lei’s uncle, Aunt Zhang and the rest of the households.
I don’t know how many times I read and reread the story and will continue to do so. I look forward to reading all the extras. Again, huge thanks!!
Thank you so much for translating this novel!! After keeping up with it for almost a year, I’m going to miss looking forward to seeing updates. This novel was quite the journey and has made me cry too many times (though I love angst).
Thank you so much for your amazing work.
Thank you for the translation. I loved this story. It was full of angst but it made the love between the two feel ever more deep and bittersweet. I am looking forward to the extras (maybe Yang Lei will finally get to top hehe)
this made me so emotional! I have loved their ups and downs. and I am so happy for them! I think this is my new favorite story I have read here.
thanks so much for all the hard work. I’m looking forward to the extras <3
Thank you, dear translator! This was so wonderful. I don’t want to part from my boys! I’d like to see them at middle age.
This is one of the best stories i stumbled on and got addicted, i literally ate every word. I was bawling my eyes for these two, it broke my heart and healed me too. I will remember them for a long long time ♥️
Thank you so much 💝
I can’t believe it’s over. Time flies. It’s been a wild ride filled with pain, longing and happiness for us readers. This novel is really close to my heart. Thank you so much for bringing this masterpiece to us, it wouldn’t have been made possible without you. May you live a happy life.
I’ve been reading this novel since some time ago, I feel so sad for it to end. Sharing this bittersweet journey with Fang Yu, Yang Lei, their brothers and everyone else was… Amazing.
Their story was heartwarming yet painful, I will miss them.
Thank you so much translator for you hard work and sharing this story with us.
I will always cherish Yang Lei akd Fang Yu’s love in my heart.
Thank you for the translation ^^
Thank you so much for translating – it was so lovely to watch their understanding of each other grow.
I am crying 😢 I am so happy right now!!! They deserve this happy ending! I loved this story so so much…. it has become one of my faves!!
Thank you for your hard work translating this novel! 💜
thank you very much for translating this gem and completing it!