The next day.
Today is Monday, and work begins as usual. At the same time, as we approach mid-August, we are about to enter the time of the festival this weekend.
I contacted him with the courage I received from Daisuke yesterday, knowing that I’d receive a message from Ippei in the morning.
[I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch. I want to see you again, Ippei. I want to talk properly. Would you like to meet me? Even though I’m like this?]
I thought there was no need for hesitant words.
I want to see you. I want to see you. Right now, I just want to convey that feeling to Ippei.
On the other hand, as I fed Kuro breakfast, I wondered if I would get a reply, even though nothing was guaranteed.
*Ping!*
[Yuta-san…! I want to see you too! Since I have an outdoor assignment today, how about meeting at the usual place before noon?]
As expected, Ippei replied promptly, even though it was morning, but for some reason… Despite the straightforward response, I felt uneasy.
Until now, I had only wanted to meet out of pleasure and liking without knowing much about Ippei, but this time it couldn’t be that simple.
I want to know Ippei’s feelings. I don’t know what outcome awaits or what feelings I’ll have afterward. But… Even so, I want to know your feelings.
[Understood, I’ll finish work early and wait at the usual place.]
[Thank you…! As soon as I finish my work, I’ll head there right away!… Please wait for me?]
Even in this state, you say you want to meet. Whatever happens next, if you want to meet, I’ll go to see you.
And I want to know your true feelings.
Ippei… I want to know more about you.
[I understand. Let’s definitely meet.] [Yes, of course!]
After exchanging greetings with Ippei for the first time in a while, I gently stroked Kuro’s cheek and left home with a slightly different pace than usual.
* * *
And then, the sixth encounter arrived.
[Do you like coffee, Ippei?]
[Yes! I love it! I actually don’t eat sweets much, so I prefer black coffee.]
We had talked about that a few times when we met before. Today, the outside was scorching hot, and sweat wouldn’t stop. Thinking Ippei might feel the same, I bought two ice-cold black coffees from the convenience store and arrived at our usual meeting spot.
My feelings as I waited for Ippei were different from the nervousness of our first encounter or the enjoyment of the previous five times. Each time we meet, I fall more in love, yet there’s a huge wall saying I shouldn’t.
What kind of conversation should I bring up when we meet today…? Can I connect the words properly and listen to Ippei’s feelings…?
I can’t help but feel more nervous than usual about meeting Ippei. What face should I put on, and how should I act? Despite receiving courage from Daisuke, every time the time to meet Ippei approaches, I become more timid.
*Knock, knock!!*
As I slumped over the steering wheel, feeling timid, I heard a knock on the window… I raised my head to the sound, and what I saw reflected in my eyes was Ippei’s smile, which I love so much and can’t get enough of.
“I’m sorry for making you wait! I always keep you waiting…”
Ippei’s words suddenly stopped, which I could hear, and instead of getting into the passenger seat as usual, the driver’s door opened.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
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Pqqfl delmxis bqfcfv atf vbbg joafg rfflcu wf ilxf atja jcv fcnfibqfv wf lc tlr ufcaif, gfogfrtlcu, rkffa rmfca.
I only wanted to know your feelings, but for some reason, as I remember you and think about you, my tears won’t stop.
Even this scent, this warmth, this beloved Ippei—none of them belong to me… But still, even if just for this moment, my heart wishes to belong to you.
“…Ugh… Ah… I-Ippei…”
“I’m sorry for causing you pain… But I’m here… You can pour out all those feelings to me, it’s okay…”
I tightly hugged Ippei, who was dressed neatly in a crisp white shirt, and let out a stream of tears while raising my voice.
“…I’m sorry…”
“No, it’s okay… Are you feeling better now?”
“…Yeah, I’m fine now. Thank you.”
As tears and emotions settled down, Ippei, who had moved away from me as we settled back into the passenger seat as usual.
I’ve shed more tears since I met Ippei. I still remember the last time I cried, but it’s been so long since I shed tears while thinking about someone so deeply.
What should I say… Where should I start to hear your feelings?
Even though I was supposed to have received courage from Daisuke, at that moment, I didn’t feel like I could connect the words smoothly.
“Yuta-san… I’m really sorry for causing you pain.”
In this indescribable atmosphere, even though Ippei must be struggling too, he always takes the initiative in our conversation, understanding my feelings. Your kindness is truly heartwarming, but sometimes it’s painful.
But if that’s the case, then it’s my turn to make the next move.
“Why is Ippei apologizing…?”
“Because I’ve been lying…”
“No… That’s not it… I haven’t given you a proper answer yet… I’m the one who’s been making you wait.”
“…That’s…”
That’s right, before hearing your feelings, I asked you to “give me time,” and I still haven’t given you an answer.
I want to see you even though you have a girlfriend.
I know whether that’s permissible or not… I know the answer to that myself.
Nevertheless, to find that answer, it’s not just about understanding Ippei’s feelings but also about expressing my own.
I want to find the answers with Ippei.
It might end up being just my own feelings, but I want to convey them properly and know your feelings.
“I’ll make sure to convey them properly…”
So, please listen to my feelings. I’m going to tell you about my feelings up until now.
“When I found out that Ippei had a girlfriend, honestly, it hurt, and I felt lonely. Even when I was away from Ippei, I thought about many things and often wondered what I should do.”
“…Yes…”
“But, but you know…? I realized that the joy and happiness of being able to see Ippei, the kindness and smile Ippei gives me, and the warmth he provides—all of that outweighed the pain and loneliness by far…”
“…Yuta-san…”
I can’t say I love you. You have a place to return to and someone to love. The words I can offer you, being like this, surely…
“So, from now on, I truly want to cherish these moments that belong only to us.”
If I can continue to see you in the future… Even if I can’t say I love you, if I can cherish these moments by your side, this is my answer to you from now on.
“Yu-Yuta-san…”
“This is my current feeling… and my answer.”
“Thank you… I’m really happy…”
Ippei seems like he’s about to burst into tears any moment now after having heard my feelings. But this time, the face he’s showing is somewhat different from the almost-tearful face I saw the fifth time.
Even though he seems to be in pain, somehow his expression looked somewhat happy to me.
“I also want to continue seeing you, Yuta-san. I’m really glad I met you… Actually, I…”
*Ring, ring, ring!!*
Right at such an important moment… It was probably the moment I could have heard Ippei’s incredibly important feelings, but the ringing of the smartphone echoed, completely oblivious to the timing in our private space.
“What terrible timing… Yuta-san, I’m sorry. It’s a call from the executive; may I take it?”
“Ah, well, it can’t be helped, right? You should answer it properly.”
“I’m really sorry…”
“It’s okay, just go ahead and answer it quickly!”
There are times when we skip work to meet each other.
We normally spend time alone together during the hours when we are making sales calls and getting instructions from clients. So, it’s important to answer calls from the company properly.
Kisaragi: “Yes, this is Kisaragi.”
Huh… Ippei’s last name is Kisaragi… There’s still so much I don’t know. Like this, I want to get to know you little by little.
“Yes… Y-yes… Wha-what!? Is there some kind of mistake…? I-I don’t think it’s possible… But… I’ll return to the office first! Please let me confirm the numbers there… Yes… I apologize and will return.”
In the exchange with the executive, Ippei’s demeanor shifted from hurriedness and urgency to a cloudy expression, somewhat lacking the usual freshness.
“A-Are you okay?”
“N-No… it’s a bit of a mess… Haa, seriously… I’ve never made such a mistake before…”
“You need to get back quickly, right?”
“Y-Yes, but… I still need to finish talking with you…”
Although Ippei tried to set aside his own situation and continue the conversation, judging from Ippei’s expression and gestures, I could tell that things were pretty serious in terms of work. After all, we’re in similar lines of work.
“Ippei? I won’t run away. And this time, I’ll be the one waiting for the day when I can hear Ippei’s story.”
“Y-Yuta-san…”
“So for now, just focus on calming down the current issue in front of you, and when you have time, let me know. That’ll be fine.”
“…Understood! I’ll handle it properly…! I’m really, really sorry!”
Ippei doesn’t seem like someone who would make a mistake; making a mistake might mean there’s some reason behind it. Still, a mistake is a mistake. I’ll be satisfied as long as I can hear your feelings properly once you’ve calmed down.
“Don’t apologize anymore… Come on! Do your best…”
“…Y-Yuta-san, thank you… I’ll be off now.”
I found myself enveloped in Ippei’s softness as I was interrupted by words and warm lips after a long time.
And with Ippei’s uttered “I’ll be off,” I felt like he would return to this space, saying “I’m home”… I had that feeling.
Ippei left behind a sweet kiss and promptly returned to work, but… I couldn’t move from that spot for a while, feeling a mix of joy and embarrassment.
