Even until Death, the Scum Gong thought I was a White LotusCh18 - Dirty and broken

He had met with a car accident on the way home and had been in a vegetative state for a long time. He had only just woken up and because he had lost his memories, he had been sent to a psychiatrist for treatment.

All of this was reasonable, but the Xie Mu, who had listened to Bo Qin explain all of this, always felt like there was something wrong. 8Z01n3

“When I went for treatment, why was Tan Tao also there…”

Bo Qin lowered his eyes. “He was still pursuing you, so he rushed over when he heard the news.”

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“Xiao Mu, don’t be afraid. Tan Tao has been dealt with, and he won’t be able to do anything to you anymore.”

The youth, who was still half asleep and had woken up to a changed world, lifted his head in a trance. “He…has been dealt with?” Iiwj5z

Half an hour later, Xie Mu frowned slightly as he stared at the blank search results.

As expected, based on what Bo Qin had told him, Tan Tao had been completely suppressed by him to the point of not being able to raise his head. Regardless of his own entertainer status, there wasn’t a single mention of him on the internet.

He should have been happy, but for some reason, he felt a faint unease.

As if, there was something wrong somewhere.

Yesterday, when faced with Tan Tao’s gaze and his words, Xie Mu had only wanted to escape him and had not listened. But now, as he recalled, why did he call him so tenderly?

“What’s wrong, Xiao Mu?”

Bo Qin stood by the youth, watching the confusion evident within his eyes. The hand that pressed down on the youth’s shoulder moved a little, and his face was still full  of a smile of indulgence. He asked casually, “Tan Tao’s downfall, aren’t you happy?”

“Didn’t you say, you were very scared, it was very annoying, and you didn’t want to see him?” jwO0dQ

“Xiao Mu…”

The man’s hand softly massaged the youth’s shoulder. “You didn’t tell me why you hated Tan Tao.”

These words were the words Bo Qin had asked Xie Mu the first time they had seen Tan Tao after Xie Mu first got together with Bo Qin, but at that time, Bo Qin was only treating Xie Mu as a complaining lover, and did not ask for details.

But now, after all that happened to Xiao Mu, Bo Qin wanted to know everything. hvaU2w

“Why, why did I hate him…”

Xie Mu’s eyes wandered for a moment, as if he was remembering something.

Xie Mu “He, he always bullied me, and laughed at me with others. He threw my homework away…”

But these things, were not the important things. BuZ07T

That day, Tan Tao had dragged him to the bathroom. The school bathrooms had separate stalls – Tan Tao had covered his mouth and pressed him against the wall…

It was May. The fragrance of gardenias drifted in through the window. He struggled desperately, but afterwards, the person he liked came.

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Gardenias…

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

Why did he always think he had forgotten something… mGaCT7

“Xiao Mu, Xiao Mu?”

Db Hlc mjiifv bea atf cjwf bo tlr ibnfg jczlberis, kjamtlcu tlr qjif, qfgqifzfv ojmf. “Qtja’r kgbcu?  Tbeg fzqgfrrlbc lrc’a ubbv.”

“Pa’r, la’r cbatlcu…”

Wlf Ze’r mbwqifzlbc kjr kfjx jcv qjras, jcv tf rjlv rboais, “P offi ilxf fnfg rlcmf P kbxf eq, P’nf yffc gfqgfrrlcu j iba bo fnfcar, ws tfjv tegar…” tiLzdk

He defenselessly pleaded with his lover. “Also, I always feel like I’ve forgotten something.”

“What do you mean you’ve forgotten something.”

The man smiled, warmly pulling him into his embrace. “You’ve been lying in a bed since your accident. It was difficult for you to even wake up – let’s not think about these things.”

After saying this, he noticed that the youth’s expression still held some hesitation. Bo Qin ventured, “Then, how about I have the psychiatrist look over you again?” HUEpmW

Xie Mu obediently nodded his head, leaning against the man’s embrace, softly asking, “Bo Qin, do you like me?”

“I like, of course I like.”

[Liar, if you like me why don’t you give me my 90 favorability]

[Ding! Bo Qin’s Favorability: 90. Host, did your face get slapped?] MbqcF

Bo Qin could obviously not let the psychiatrist give Xie Mu a detailed check-up.

He was only, along with the psychiatrist, performing a small skit for his lover.

In the situation of the youth becoming stressed due to his long coma, he could write down his musings and worries in a notebook no one else could peek at. This could both relieve stress and make sure he didn’t mix up his memories.

He clutched at the notebook given to him by the doctor’s goodwill, solemnly nodding his head. ph3jTU

The man waited outside during the appointment. After he saw his lover walk out, he came up to him and affectionately petted his head. “How is it?”

“The doctor told me to write in my diary.”

Chrysanthemum Garden.

Xie Mu pursed his lips, and said softly, “He said I should write down anything weighing on my mind.”

His expression seemed like he didn’t really want to write. Bo Qin noticed, but didn’t say anything about it, and instead laughed. “Are you worried I’ll look?” IT2e p

The youth’s expression displayed a look of bewilderment. “No, I just…”

“Don’t worry, everyone has their own secrets.”

Bo Qin’s smile was soothing, the very image of a good man. “Is this a lock-protected notebook?”  “You’ve added a password, so I won’t look at it. When Xiao Mu wants to talk about it, you can talk to me about it, okay?”

Xie Mu gazed into the tiny spark within Bo Qin’s eyes, a little moved by the tenderness of his lover, but also a little struck by the shame of hiding from him. Finally, he reached out his hand and carefully placed his hand into the man’s long, slender hand. 8dnc3P

The youth said softly, “Bo Qin, you are so good.”

From the youth’s eyes, one could tell he wholeheartedly trusted his lover, trusted him with everything.

[Host, you really trust him? ]

[No, I’m tricking him. ] k3NZ0R

Xie Mu revealed a sweet smile, and Bo Qin thought he was smiling at him. The corners of his lips lifted up some more, and his eyes were full of love.

They left the hospital. Bo Qin opened the car door and was about to have his lover step in, when he suddenly looked straight ahead.

The man clenched his hands slightly, his eyes looking downwards.

He turned around. He had noticed Tan Tao. L8R5rP

He unmovingly glanced at Xie Mu, but at the look of disgust clearly in the youth’s eyes, relaxed his fists.

“Xiao Mu…”

Tan Tao had nothing in his sight except the youth who was currently watching him. He hadn’t slept at all yesterday, and his eyes were bloodshot. Under his eyes were two large dark circles; he cut quite the sorry figure.

He saw his own beloved wrinkle his brows, not a trace of affection remaining in his expression. He could only feel the bitterness deeply within his heart. MQRuPH

This was all his fault, so he had to bear the consequences.

But, it was too bitter to bear.

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It was so bitter that even though he knew it was impossible, he wanted to reach for that one in ten thousand chance.

Bo Qin raised his brows slightly, disregarding Tan Tao’s presence completely, explaining to Xie Mu, “He’s about to go bankrupt. He knows I listen to you, so he’s come to beg you for mercy.” JfbnzX

The man casually made up this lie. Anyways, his Xiao Mu would definitely listen.

As expected, after listening to his lover’s words, the hatred in Xie Mu’s eyes deepened.

He said coldly, “You don’t need to trouble yourself. I won’t have Bo Qin retract.”

“No, not that…” 1IjKps

Seeing the hatred in Xie Mu’s eyes, the bitterness in Tan Tao’s heart increased by a few points.

He cautiously explained as he warmly and flawlessly reached out his hand.

Upon the man’s heavily scarred hand, rested a gardenia.

Seeing that the youth had been struck into silence, Tan Tao carefully let out a smile. “I picked this for you, don’t you like it?” OS40 g

His hand was still covered in the self-inflicted knife wounds from last time. It had not fully healed yet, and even seemed to be fresh.

But even this kind of wounded hand carefully held a white bud.

He strived to smile, but his eyes seemed to be crying. “The flowers on the table today were personally picked up by me. When I was picking them, I thought of you.”

“Darling, you remember, right…” qlGIMX

Tan Tao’s tone was more of a plea than a question – this pitiful figure would have long since made 19 year old Xie Mu rush towards him.

But he was already dead.

Xie Mu cast his gaze away, saying coldly, “Don’t call me that, it’s disgusting.”

“I don’t want to see you again, you will only make me want to throw up.” pg1yjE

Tan Tao’s smile, which he had been trying his hardest to sustain, fell immediately. His lips quivered, but insistently stuck his hand out.

“The flower…is for you…”

Chrysanthemum Garden.

The youth looked at the scarred hand in front of him in distaste, and struck at it harshly.

—The gardenia fell to the ground soundlessly and rolled under the car. U4vdhy

“My flower…my darling’s favorite flower…”

The rims of Tan Tao’s eyes turned red and he knelt on the ground to pick up the flower.

“Xiao Mu, let’s go.”

Bo Qin curved his lips in satisfaction, and supported the youth inside the car. XOxb86

The car drove off, a tire running over the gardenia.

Tan Tao was still kneeling on the ground, staring at the flattened flower.

It was dirty, broken.

It wasn’t what his darling liked. 3JOduz

The hand covered in wounds shakily picked the gardenia up, as if it was a precious treasure, and pressed it against his embrace.

Tan Tao’s lips trembled, and his bloodshot eyes filled with hatred.

He must have it.

He must take back his darling! 8Icnw

He had known Bo Qin for so many years, who didn’t understand the other?

The man’s lips raised as he gently stroked the gardenia, revealing a slightly fevered and wild smile.

His darling, would definitely come back.

Because he was so obedient, and loved him so much. sq 39L