Translator/Editor:- Max
Ying Nian chuckled, shook his head, and said, “It’s really ridiculous. Back when we graduated from college, we talked about working hard together. But in the end, it’s only me who’s been trying hard, only me.”
Ying Nian suddenly looked at Yao Xiuyuan, as if he couldn’t understand, and asked him puzzledly, “Why is it always just me who’s trying hard? It was like this during school, and it’s been the same after graduation. Am I not trying hard enough? But in the end, it’s still just me working hard. My parents were with me for a while, then left. My uncles were with me for a while, then abandoned me. I thought Tang Yu could stick around longer. We planned to get married since college, but in the end, it’s still just me working hard. Why is it always just me?”
Yao Xiuyuan couldn’t answer this question. He also wanted to ask, why does he always have to be treated like this? He’s already been through so much, he has worked so hard in his life, why did he still have to be bullied like this?
His heart was a little heavy and he felt a little uncomfortable for no reason. He looked at Ying Nian and could only say, “It’s not your fault. It’s because they are not good enough. They aren’t worthy of you.”
Ying Nian felt a little sad when he heard this. It’s not that he had never complained before, but whether he complained or resented, he kept it buried inside, invisible to everyone. He worked hard to live each day positively, trying to avoid negative emotions. He wanted to cherish each day and make himself a little happier. But in the quiet of the night, he would still question why he was always alone in the end. Was it because he wasn’t good enough? He also wished to hear someone say, “It’s not your fault, it’s theirs.” Yet, he couldn’t even share his own feelings with others, so how could he receive such comfort?
Now that he heard it, he felt uncomfortable, yet at the same time, he felt he got what he had wished for.
He suppressed his emotions and continued, “What happened next was very simple. I told Tang Yu that I wanted to break up, but he didn’t agree. I insisted on breaking up, and he started to constantly pester me. When I first debuted, Tang Yu was afraid that I would be bullied by other companies, so he had me sign with a company he was familiar with. Later, when I wanted to break up and my contract was about to end, I naturally wanted to terminate it. He warned me that other agencies wouldn’t dare to sign me. I had just paid off the debt to the Tang family and owed money to Guan Han. It was not a small sum. If I didn’t work as an actor, I would have to work for a long time to pay it off. I had no choice but to think of Xiyu Entertainment.”
“What money did you pay to the Tang family?” Yao Xiuyuan asked, puzzled.
“High school tuition fees for three years; food, clothing and accommodation, and Tang Yu’s investment in me after I debuted, as well as some other odds and ends. I paid for my university tuition and other fees myself, so I don’t need to repay those.” He added. “Since I decided to break up, I wanted to do it cleanly. I returned this money to Tang Yu, and I felt relieved. However, Tang Yu didn’t want to accept it, so I gave it to his mother. As long as someone accepted it, it didn’t have to be Tang Yu.”
Yao Xiuyuan felt he was quite proud. “If I were you, I wouldn’t have paid a single penny back. Without you in high school for three years, Tang Yu would still be a loser who skipped classes and failed exams, unlike now, graduating from a prestigious university. As for the investments he made in you after your debut, he’s already made a fortune, so there’s no reason to repay him the principal. You’re just too stubborn, not thinking about yourself at all.”
“I did it for my own sake. If I didn’t, I would always feel indebted to him. But by repaying the money, I know I don’t owe him anything anymore. Where I am right now is inseparable from the Tang family. Without Tang Yu’s father’s support, if we go ten years back, I couldn’t have imagined standing under the spotlight, casually filming a TV series, or receiving endorsements, which is a thing I wouldn’t have dared to dream of. In that sense, I’m grateful to Tang Yu’s father.”
Yao Xiuyuan smiled and shook his head. “You don’t say that. You were able to come here for schooling in the first place because your grades were good enough. Even without Tang Rui’s sponsorship, you would have entered No.6 Middle School, and others would have funded you. You’ve done well in the entertainment industry not just because of Tang Yu’s help, but mainly because of your own efforts. That’s why fans like you.”
“I don’t deny that the Tang family helped you, but this help wasn’t indispensable. In other words, if it was my father who sponsored your education back then, and if I invested in you after your debut, you would still have achieved what you have today. So, this isn’t the main factor. You don’t need to attribute all of this to the Tang family; instead, you should be grateful for your own efforts. It’s your hard work and excellence that have made today’s achievements possible that you couldn’t have imagined ten years ago.”
Ying Nian lowered his gaze, thought about what he said. He said softly, “But timing is also very important. Just like back then, it was Tang Yu’s father who appeared, not your father. If the timing was different, everything might have turned out differently.”
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
Yao Xiuyuan stopped talking. Ying Nian was right, timing was also very important. A person’s success was always indispensable without the right time, right place, right people, just like even if he felt sorry for Ying Nian, it was not their family that supported Ying Nian back then, but Tang Yu’s family.
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Timing is very important. He was nine years behind Tang Yu.
Yao Xiuyuan felt a bit depressed and took a sip from his wine glass.
Ying Nian saw this and asked him, “Do you not like what I said?”
Yao Xiuyuan shook his head. “I think you’re right. Timing is very important, so there’s no ‘what if’. So… you’re right.”
Ying Nian smiled at him tenderly. “But if time goes back, and if your family were willing to sponsor me, I would probably choose your family.”
Yao Xiuyuan was stunned for a moment and unconsciously looked up at him.
Ying Nian laughed self-deprecatingly. “Before yesterday, even though I was fed up with Tang Yu’s persistence, I never regretted our love during our student days. It was a beautiful memory for me. Despite the breakup, I didn’t want to deny that memory. But after yesterday, I feel like our meeting was a mistake from the moment we met. I even wondered if I ever truly understood him, if I didn’t understand people well, and I felt pathetic and ridiculous. Do you know why I’m sitting here drinking tonight?”
Yao Xiuyuan guessed that he had a nightmare, but he shook his head cooperatively.
“You’re lying.” Ying Nian said bluntly, “You can sit here with me, not saying anything, not asking anything, and drink with me, which means you already have your own answer.”
Yao Xiuyuan smiled helplessly. “Alright, I admit I guessed an answer. I guessed you had a nightmare. You didn’t sleep very soundly last night.”
“Then what do you think I had a nightmare about?”
“Related to Tang Yu.”
Ying Nian nodded, looking at Yao Xiuyuan calmly. “I dreamt about him. In the dream, his face changed, twisted and terrifying, like a ghost. He walked towards me, and I couldn’t move. I woke up scared.”
“It’s quite funny, isn’t it?” He laughed. “He used to be the lover of my dreams, countless nights I wished to dream about him. But now, he’s turned into my nightmare. Every time I dream of him, I wake up frightened, drenched in cold sweat. This change, it’s really funny.”
Ying Nian sighed, then couldn’t help but laugh at himself, “We’ve known each other for nine years. Even though we broke up last year, we still loved each other for seven years. If we couldn’t overcome the seven-year itch, it would have been fine, but we ended up like this. I thought the constant entanglement before was embarrassing enough, but I never imagined he could do something even more embarrassing. When we were in love, it was genuine love. Why can’t we give each other a bit of final dignity? Must everything be done so disgustingly? In the beginning, he used to be so cautious even when he kissed me, always asking if it was okay. But now, even though he knows I don’t want it, even though he knows I’ll hate him when I wake up, he turned a deaf ear to it. How did things between us turn into this over the years?!”
As Ying Nian spoke, tears fell from his eyes. The emotions he had suppressed all night collapsed at this moment. He reached to cover his face, crying silently. He couldn’t understand how things turned out between them like this. The young man he had once loved so deeply, how could he have become the person he was now? With his head bowed, he cried, quietly but suppressed, silently yet painfully.
Yao Xiuyuan looked at him like this, feeling as if Ying Nian had placed a stone in his heart, weighing him down, making it difficult for him to breathe.
He couldn’t bear to see Ying Nian cry like this. He moved closer and pulled him into his arms, softly saying, “Let it out. Don’t suppress yourself like this.”
Ying Nian leaned against him, not resisting, but also not crying out loud.
Yao Xiuyuan patted his back and coaxed softly, “It’s okay. It’s just the two of us in this room. You can cry out loud; no one else will hear it. It won’t affect anyone else. It’s okay.”
Ying Nian still remained silent.
Yao Xiuyuan thought for a moment, then asked him, “Do you not want me to hear it either? How about this, I won’t listen then? I’ll cover my own ears, or you can help me cover them, this way I won’t hear anything.”
He reached out to take Ying Nian’s hand as he said this, but Ying Nian shook his head in his arms, remaining silent.
Yao Xiuyuan found himself somewhat helpless against him. Ying Nian had a stubborn side to his temper, and once he became stubborn, there was nothing anyone could do. Forget it, Yao Xiuyuan thought to himself, Over these years, he has developed this personality. It’s already not easy for him to share this much with me. He shouldn’t expect more. After all, They’re living together now. He’ll just pay more attention to Ying Nian and make sure he doesn’t keep negative emotions bottled up in his heart.
If he prefers to cry like this, then let him cry like this.
Ying Nian remained quietly in his embrace, crying for a while. As he cried, the alcohol from the beer and fruit wine he had drank earlier began to ferment, causing him to feel sleepy.
He leaned against Yao Xiuyuan, feeling inexplicably at ease and even wanted to fall asleep like that. However, he straightened up, moved away from Yao Xiuyuan’s embrace, and said thank you.
Yao Xiuyuan laughed and said, “Saying thank you again, why do you still refuse to change despite repeated admonitions? No, I have to find a way to cure this habit of yours.”
As he said this, he really seemed to be thinking about it.
Ying Nian felt there was nothing wrong with his habit. “Saying thank you is basic courtesy.” He defended himself.
“But I said it wasn’t necessary before.” Yao Xiuyuan replied. “Here’s the deal: from now on, every time you say thank you, you have to call me ge once. I’ll let it slide this time, but starting from next time, it counts.”
Ying Nian found his rule somewhat nonsensical. “How can it be done like this?”
“Now it does, it’s settled.”
“How can it just be settled on?” Ying Nian was puzzled.
Yao Xiuyuan smiled, “That’s right, it’s settled. You have the right to object, but objections are invalid.”
Ying Nian stopped talking. If objections were invalid, what else could he say? However, he added, “But it can’t just be me who has the rules, right?”
“What rules do you want to set for me? Tell me.” Yao Xiuyuan generously offered, “I don’t really say thank you much, so I don’t care.”
That’s true. Ying Nian thought. He found that Yao Xiuyuan really didn’t need his help much. But on the contrary, he was the one asking for help. He couldn’t think of anything for now, and Yao Xiuyuan didn’t rush him. With a good temper, he said, “You can take your time to think. You can set rules later when you come up with something. Fair deal, right?”
Ying Nian nodded.
“Ok, it’s a deal.” Yao Xiuyuan fixed the tone with a single hammer blow.
The author has something to say:
Yao Xiuyuan: Call me ge
Ying Nian: Heh
When writing this chapter, it suddenly occurred to me that if the Yao family had sponsored Ying Nian back then, it would have been pretty good~
Translator’s note:- My eyes are now a waterfall. WHOSE CUTTING ONIONS?!!!
Ying Nain will hopefully sleep well after all that
Ying Nian 😭😭
A minor typo up there : thingr >> thing
Thanks for the chapter!
Fixed it! Thank you♥️
😢🌶🔪
Thanks for the update
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