Editor: PM87
Proofreader: Noks
Shen Qiang was considering two burial sites, one of which was in the local cemetery in the city, and the other one was located further away in his hometown. The land in his hometown was being sold by its owner as a whole—rather than as multiple plots, so it was very big, but its surrounding environment was clean and good. On the other hand, the burial site in the local cemetery in the city was closer and would be more convenient to manage.
Early in the morning, Feng Yang went to his appointment along with Ban Yu—he couldn’t do anything about it. Ban Yu just kept following him!
Hence, Shen Qiang welcomed two people and one bird, and they rushed to his hometown first. Shen Qiang’s hometown was 210 kilometers away from Panyun City, which could be covered in less than two hours by taking the highway. Shen Qiang drove his own jeep, with his parents in it as well. Liu Jianghe, Uncle Liu’s son, drove a Hummer which carried Ban Yu, Feng Yang, and Hua Cheng, following behind Shen Qiang’s jeep.
Yesterday’s episode of Ban Yu hooking spider webs in the park pierced through Uncle Liu’s mind and made his head ache. So today, he didn’t accompany Ban Yu, and instead went to the supermarket as ordered by Grandfather Ban.
When the group arrived at Shen Qiang’s hometown, their cars could not enter the inner area as there were no roads. So Father and Mother Shen remained at their relative’s house, while Feng Yang, Ban Yu, and Liu Jianghe followed Shen Qiang to the fields nearby.
“The one I want to buy is that piece of land.” Shen Qiang pointed to the highest mountain in the distance and continued, “There are many mountains in this area, and the land I want to buy is the one behind that mountain. There is a stream nearby, and the surrounding area is quiet and nice. I’ve heard from those who sell burial sites that this place has good feng shui. But I haven’t finalised the deal yet, because I wanted to ask you about it first. I can’t believe what others say, but you I’ll believe.”
“The feng shui is really good here, but I’m afraid it will change in a few years. Is that land expensive?”
“It’s 700,000 yuan.” Shen Qiang smiled. “In fact, my parents are nostalgic people and they want to come back here after they’ve passed away. But if they learn the price of this land, they won’t let me buy it. So, I told them that it was only 200,000.”
“Land worth 700,000 yuan with a high mountain behind. The mountain has a connecting pulse running throughout it like a dragon, and is located far away from the bustling city, on a broad and flat stretch of land.” Feng Yang stopped when he was less than 20 meters away from the destination. “It’s really a good place. If you have spare money, I suggest you buy this land. But you can’t turn it into a cemetery.”
“Why is that?”
“Today this is a mountain, tomorrow it’ll be more than a mountain.” Ban Yu smiled, “Air leak!”
“Air leak?” Shen Qiang didn’t quite understand what Ban Yu meant. He asked Feng Yang, “What air leak?”
“His mouth is leaking!” Feng Yang glared at Ban Yu. “In a word, you can’t turn this place into a burial ground for your parents in the future, but the land is worth the price. So Big Brother, you should think about it again. In addition, even if this area is rich with good feng shui, it is impossible to convert it into a burial site. As for the cemetery, let’s go to another place after this, I can choose a burial site for you.”
Shen Qiang nodded slowly and pondered on Feng Yang’s words.
It will change in the future…
In the past two years, rumours about a high-speed rail being built here had spread, but no one had confirmed this news. Is that the change?
Shen Qiang didn’t ask any more questions and decided to go back to discuss this matter with his wife.
Feng Yang felt that the spiritual Qi here was more abundant than in the city, so he didn’t rush to follow Shen Qiang. He turned and walked around the area, while Hua Cheng took this opportunity to catch some insects. Only Ban Yu, after Feng Yang had said that his mouth was leaking, remained where he was; he tilted his head and fell into deep contemplation.
Why did he say that all of a sudden? Obviously, he hadn’t been thinking that at all! And he himself didn’t know what secret he’d been hinting at!
Ban Yu discovered that he was becoming increasingly unable to figure out things these days. His mind was chaotic sometimes, as if there were many scattered memories in there, ones he had never known about before. But when did those events take place? It was unclear to him.
Fortunately, the one thing he was very clear on was that: Feng Yang is mine!
Feng Yang could feel that the Xianjue grass had been absorbing the natural spiritual Qi in the area. The closer he went to the mountain, the more Qi he could absorb. Of course, this amount couldn’t be compared to when he’d been in the immortal realm. At the current speed, he couldn’t ascend even if he absorbed the Qi here for a thousand years without doing anything else. But at least, it was much better here than it was in the city.
In the future, he needed to find and go to a place with more spiritual Qi.
Because Father and Mother Shen were already here in their hometown, they decided to stay with their relatives for two days. So when Feng Yang and Ban Yu went back to the spot where they had parked the cars, only Shen Qiang was there. He had promised to pick up the old couple in two days.
Liu Jianghe continued to follow Shen Qiang’s car to their next destination. On their way, Ban Yu took out a thermos cup and handed it to Feng Yang. “Yangyang, it was windy just now. Drink something hot.”
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
Feng Yang was still angry about last night’s ‘dragon spirit’ incident. He was also angry about having been forced to stay in the Ban House, and about Ban Yu following him here. Nevertheless, Ban Yu was so kind to him, and after last night’s ‘treatment,’ his wound had indeed become better. Therefore, he was both angry and troubled, with other subtle feelings mixed in there.
Mfcu Tjcu jmmfqafv atf tba wlix jcv jrxfv Djc Te meglberis, “Qts vb sbe jikjsr ulnf wf tba wlix?”
Lf vlvc’a rffw ab gfwfwyfg rjslcu atja tf ilxfv la, bg tjv tf?
Djc Te gfqilfv, “Tbe jgf rwjii. Po sbe vglcx j iba bo wlix, sbe mjc ugbk ajiifg.”
Mfcu Tjcu, ktb tjv pera bqfcfv atf ilv, qea atf meq yjmx lcab Djc Te’r tjcvr. “Gglcx la sbegrfio!”
Liu Jianghe, who was in the driver’s seat: Young Master, you can really talk!
They finally arrived in the parking lot of the cemetery near the city, where many people were selling wreaths and gold ingots as items for offerings. Shen Qiang only wanted to see the burial plots inside, so he didn’t buy anything. But Feng Yang bought some items in advance, because he didn’t know whether he would have the chance to celebrate the Qingming Festival at school or not. He didn’t buy any paper money, just ten bags of the gold ingots and some paper clothes.
The parking lot was a little far away from the designated area where people burned their offerings, as stipulated by the cemetery. In order to avoid carrying these things around when choosing the burial site with Shen Qiang, he burned the paper clothes and gold ingots first.
Shen Qiang looked at Feng Yang curiously. He wanted to know how Feng Yang burned the paper clothes and gold ingots. That way, he would also confirm whether his way of burning the offerings for his ancestors was the right way or not, if not, he could then learn from Feng Yang.
The first one to receive the offerings was Wan Xiang. Feng Yang wrote the name on the ground so Shen Qiang was able to see it. He didn’t know how this person was related to Feng Yang, but the next name he wrote down gave Shen Qiang a shock.
Feng Yang wrote down his own name!
How could anyone burn offerings for themselves?
A shiver ran down Shen Qiang’s back and he asked, “Feng Yang, y-you, why did you write down your own name?”
Feng Yang hurriedly replied, “It’s my friend with the same name as me, not me. Big Brother, don’t think too much.”
Shen Qiang was relieved.
Looking at Feng Yang’s expression, there was nothing strange about it. It wasn’t Shen Qiang’s first time visiting the cemetery or attending a funeral. He had attended the funerals of relatives who had passed, as well as those held at his friends’ houses. Though, every time he came here to the cemetery, the atmosphere would become gloomy, which was the opposite of his feelings at present. He didn’t know why, but he didn’t feel gloomy at all after stepping into the cemetery today. This visit felt no different from when he visited other public places.
Ban Yu had also been standing near Feng Yang, but he didn’t pay attention to who he was burning offerings for. He just stared at Feng Yang’s side profile… Why is my baby so beautiful? He’s so good to look at, and I want to treat his wound again!
Liu Jianghe then asked, “Young Madam, I think everyone also uses Baijiu as an offering. Do you want to too? I’ll buy a bottle for you if you want.”
Feng Yang waved his hand to reject his offer, and after seeing that all the things he had burned had turned to ashes, he motioned with his chin towards the cemetery. “Let’s go inside and visit the cemetery.”
The Feng Shui Master of this place had graded each burial site within the cemetery according to his own internal grading methods and had thus set a corresponding price. From the lowest price of 28,000 yuan to the highest price of 168,000 yuan, there were nine different levels and prices to choose from. For most people, the more expensive the price, the better it would be. But Feng Yang advised Shen Qiang to choose one that was within the price range of 128,000 yuan.
There were several burial sites that were available at this price. Shen Qiang couldn’t decide which one to choose at this moment, so he decided to go back and ask his parents instead.
Feng Yang had just come here to help Shen Qiang choose the cemetery and burial sites, so after this point, he couldn’t say anything more. When they were about to part, he advised Shen Qiang that the wooden bead Ban Yu had given him was good for Mother Shen’s health, so he could give it to her.
Shen Qiang said, “Thanks for today. Big Brother won’t send you away. If you have any problems, call me anytime.”
“Okay.” Feng Yang got in the car and returned to the city with Ban Yu.
“Yangyang, shall we go home?” asked Ban Yu, who had turned on his sticky-mode.
“You go home, I still have something to do.” Feng Yang added, “Don’t follow me! If you do that, I’ll hit you!”
“Just hit, am I afraid of you?” Ban Yu turned sideways, rested his elbow against the car door, and stared at Feng Yang with a ‘no one can stop me from loving you’ expression.
Feng Yang was so angry that he turned to look out of the window.
It was strange. General Wan Xiang had previously said that he couldn’t beat up or say anything to make Ban Yu sad, else his merits would be greatly reduced. But yesterday, he had clearly chased Ban Yu and beaten him, yet his merits and virtues had increased instead of reducing.
Hua Cheng also didn’t know the reason for this.
However, when Fang Yang and Hua Cheng saw Bai Chen and Wei Dongyu again, they suddenly understood.
Feng Yang had foreseen that he would meet the Bai Chen couple again someday, after Shen Qiang had asked him last night for help with his friend. As for the reason for this meeting, it was simple.
Bai Chen and Wei Dongyu wanted to make their relationship public, but they didn’t know how successful their chances of being accepted would prove to be. So, when they heard from Shen Qiang that Feng Yang was powerful, and then also witnessed how he’d easily guessed their relationship status, they decided to ask Feng Yang for help. Anyway, asking wouldn’t cost them anything, right? So the couple made an appointment with Feng Yang to meet in Bai Chen’s apartment.
Of course, the sticky Ban Yu automatically followed as well.
Feng Yang and Ban Yu sat on the sofa across from Bai Chen and Wei Dongyu. It was nighttime, because they couldn’t meet during the day. Feng Yang had no time, while Bai Chen and Wei Dongyu had to go to work.
“We’ve known each other for almost 15 years, and we’ve been together for three years.” Bai Chen continued, “Our families have been urging us to get married, but we don’t want to get married to other people, so…”
Feng Yang replied, “I know, you don’t need to say it. I want to ask something first. If you two come out successfully, can you rent this house out to me?”
“Ah?” Bai Chen was confused. “You want to rent this house?”
“No, he doesn’t!” Ban Yu said hurriedly.
“Shut up!” Feng Yang kicked Ban Yu’s leg under the tea table. “I want to rent it! Why are you saying no? Where will I live if I don’t rent a house?”
“Live in my house! We are a family! Yangyang, this house is so small. How big is my house? There are plenty of trees outside too, so Hua Cheng has a place to play.”
“Ga! Long live my Guye!” Hua Cheng quickly flattered Ban Yu!
“Long live your ass! Get out of here and face the wall!” Feng Yang grabbed Hua Cheng and threw him to the side.
Hua Cheng flapped his wings and flew to the nearby wall. Then he swooped down to the ground and, facing the wall, stood still. Bai Chen and Wei Dongyu looked at this scene in front of them. How could this bird understand so much?
Bai Chen looked at Hua Cheng for a while and then said, “If we can come out smoothly, this house can be rented to you. Dongyu, what do you think?”
Wei Dongyu nodded. “Sure. If we can get together, who is willing to pass a secret door just to meet?”
Feng Yang said, “Then you two tell me your names and the eight characters of your birth date. I’ll choose a good day for you. In addition, when you go to see both of your parents, remember to take it with you…” Feng Yang pointed to Ban Yu. “The wooden bead he gave you last time.”
Wei Dongyu exclaimed, “That wooden bead? I gave it to my niece.”
Bai Chen said, “Won’t just one be enough? Mine is still here.”
“You can choose between a 100% success rate or a 50% success rate,” said Feng Yang.
Wei Dongyu: “!!!”
Bai Chen asked Wei Dongyu, “Can’t you get it back?”
“My niece has returned to the United States.” Wei Dongyu then turned to Ban Yu. “Brother, do you still have more beads? If so, please give me another one, or I can buy it.”
Ban Yu took out a small bag from his pocket and said, “You mean this one?”
Wei Dongyu nodded subconsciously, but he was screaming in his heart, How come his timing is so good?
The cloth bag was bulging. Strangely, before Ban Yu took it out, his pant pocket had been flat, as if it was empty.
Feng Yang and Bai Chen also noticed this. Feng Yang had a feeling that the small cloth bag Ban Yu used was not an ordinary cloth bag. As for Bai Chen, he didn’t pay attention further and asked him, “Can you give us one or sell us one?”
Ban Yu was very straightforward and grabbed a handful of beads from the bag, probably more than ten. “I can give you one, but you can’t rent this house out to my fiancée.”
Bai Chen and Wei Dongyu looked to Feng Yang for help.
Feng Yang asked Ban Yu, “Do you want to be beaten again?”
Ban Yu shook his head. “Fighting is a sign of affection and cursing is a sign of love, but to be beaten is another thing!”
Hua Cheng, who had been as still as a statue up until then, heard his words and jumped around with his fat little body. “No wonder! No wonder!”
Feng Yang got up quickly and said to the couple, “You know my cell phone number. Remember to send me the eight characters of your birth dates, and I will send you the best day to come out to your parents.” Then he made two attempts to hit Ban Yu’s head, but none of them landed.
Hua Cheng exclaimed, “Ga ga! The light, the light!”
Feng Yang almost choked on his own breath, which made his brain ache in turn. He put on his shoes and left Bai Chen’s house without even calling for Ban Yu and Hua Cheng.
Ban Yu followed suit. But when he walked to the porch to change into his shoes, he suddenly saw something on the shoe rack. He picked it up and asked Bai Chen, “Can I have this?”
After seeing what it was, Bai Chen nodded. “En.”
Ban Yu took it and chased after Feng Yang. But this time, Feng Yang walked very fast and seemed to be very unhappy.
Hua Cheng thought for a moment and suggested, “Guye, please don’t chase Master at this moment. Slow down, give him some alone time, or my Master will become more angry.”
Ban Yu thought that Hua Cheng was right. After confirming that Feng Yang was staying in the hotel again, he went home.
Grandfather Ban was reading a newspaper in the living room. He looked up at his grandson who had just arrived, and asked him, “Xiao Yu, what’s wrong?”
Ban Yu sat opposite his grandpa and said, “Yangyang doesn’t like me following him.”
Grandfather Ban folded the newspaper and advised, “No one likes to be followed all the time. Didn’t Grandpa tell you? The person who pursues the one he likes should also be flexible. If you watch him too closely, the other party will definitely feel unhappy. Instead of following him like this every day, it’s better to start out as friends first, so as to have a buffer, and you’ll have more opportunities to get to know each other.”
Ban Yu thought this sounded reasonable and nodded. “You are right, thank you for your advice.”
Ban Yu put the thing he had brought from Bai Chen’s house on the table in front of Grandfather Ban.
It looked like a packet of snacks, but the surface of the packet was covered with text in a foreign language, so Grandfather Ban couldn’t understand what it was. He asked, “Xiao Yu, what is this?”
“It’s a snack for you,” replied Ban Yu.
Grandfather Ban was very happy. Although recently his grandson had taken to calling him by a very disturbing name—Prime Minister of Turtle—his grandson listened sincerely to his advice and also brought him snacks. What did that mean? It showed that his grandson still had him in his heart!
The old man couldn’t wait to open the package and eat a few pieces of the snack. But when he did so, he realized that the pieces felt a little dry and hard, and their taste was also not quite right. He turned the bag around and scrutinized the packaging, and found that there was a sticker on it in Chinese.
***
Baorui Turtle Food, imported from Germany!
Buy it with ease, and your turtle will eat happily!
Production date: February 5, 2016
Shelf life: 3 years
***
The old Prime Minister of Turtle counted the shelf life on his fingers and was shocked.
It’s expired!!!
…
Poor Prime Minister of Turtle grandpa.
😂😂Thank you for the chapter. I love this story
He’s worried more that it’s expired than the fact that it’s turtle food?? LOL
Thanks for the chapter! 😘
I didn’t pick that up – yes!! You’re right. 😂😂😂too funny
Thanks for the chapter… 👍💖💖
Poor grandfather Ban… Ban Yu have a little consideration for your grandfather 😂😂
I wonder what air leak meant?
Thanks for the great translation ♥️
Grandpa, you’re focusing on the wrong thing 🤣🤣
Thank you for the chapter ❤
He’s probably used to it at this point lol. I can’t help but wonder if he’s eaten it before tho….
This novel continues to be hilarious! The punch lines keep coming! Though, my dear Ban Yu, your relationship parameters could use some gentling. Though, I suppose it’s a good thing considering your partner that you find fighting and swearing at you to be affection! Always an optimist, this gong.
Thanks for your hard work translating!
Oh, Feng Yan. Ban Yu countered your house renting venture. The couple need the bead for successful talks but the bead costs you your almost new rented house 😢 and Ban Yu has such strong merit value that they really need to comply. Everything will go well in due time. So Feng Yan, jiayou!
Grandfather turtle, your grandson wanted to treat you but i guess he’s not completely there yet. Praying for your health and happiness.🙏
Thank you for translating 💕💕💕
I feel so bad bad for Grandpa Turtle 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
If I keep reading I will laugh till death… I can’t stop laughing about grandpa eating expired turtle food 🤣🤣🤣
I always find it funny every time I read “the prime minister of turtle” xD
Thank you so much for your hard work. Almost passed out laughing so hard. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Didn’t just give Hime pet food, gave expired pet food 🤣
Grandpa Ban was happy to have given snacks by his grandson, That was another matter that the snack was imported but It was for turtles!!! But the grandpa was more worried about it being expired!! God I wonder just which other stuff his grandson has gifted him
😂😂😂!!!
This novel is so hilarious 😂 🤣🤣🤣 I have not laughed like this in a while 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂
i laugh so hard 🤣
Ban Yu jusqqqq!!! 😭🤣😭🤣😭😭🤣