Their Long Night of IndulgenceCh12 - Their Eternal Restful Night

“When I first noticed Qin Cang, my first thought was this guy must be the target of every bully. Then I learned he had a big temper, not the one that irritated people, but stubbornness that poke out by accident. A kind that is actually very attractive.

“He did not have many people after him even with his good looks because he had already announced his dating status. Many people stepped down dispiritedly. u4UGQL

I’m different, I think he has no relationship with his girlfriend at all, like a child playing house, the two of them don’t even talk on the phone very much, it’s very dull.

“But I was different. I can tell he had no feelings towards his girlfriend, their relationship was like children playing house. They rarely call each other on the phone, it was such a tasteless relationship.

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I am taller than him, and when talking to him, he always looks up and looks at me with those bright and clear eyes, the more frank he is, the more difficult it is for me to calm down, because I have misconceptions about him.

“Because I am taller than him, he always had to look up to me with those bright eyes of his when we talk. The kinder he acted towards me, the more difficult it was for me to calm down, because I started to develop weird ideas towards him. T7AWoL

“I could not remember when it started, maybe it was when he shook my shoulder to wake me up for class, maybe it was during his time working part-time at the school canteen and scooped a larger portion for me, maybe it was when he walked under the sun and looked up at me with a equally bright smile, maybe it was earlier than that, when he snatched away my underwear in the bedroom shower…

“In short, this weird idea was sown like a seed. It grew bigger and tall, took root so deeply that even I could not control my idea anymore. So I simply confessed to him, which he called me crazy.”

Yang Yiqian looked at the picture of Qin Cang on the tombstone and smiled, “Xiao Cang was very kind and soft hearted. Even after my obscene behaviour, he still forgave me at the end, but not without hiding from me for a long time and labelling me as a pervert.

I pursued him persistently, but he refused tirelessly. Finally in his junior year, he broke up with his girlfriend and agreed to try it with me. I was so happy that I hugged him and wanted to announce the good news to the world.

“I pursued him relentlessly, which he kept firmly refusing. Finally, in our third year when he broke up with his girlfriend, he promised to give us a try. At that time, I was happy to death, with him in my arms, I wished I could announce this great news to the world.

“At that time, we did everything together, it was like we wanted to become one entity. Xiao Cang was actually a very independent person. His grandmother was all he had since his childhood, so he was very capable of everything. Sometimes he would bruise from bumping into things, or cut himself during cutting, because they were small wounds that heal in a few days, he paid no mind to them.

“Although I have been taking care of him, there was bound to be carelessness. Whenever he fell ill, I would blame him as well as myself. Later, he gradually learned to rely on me. He would occasionally rebuke in a cute way for my enjoyment.

“I chose him unswervingly. For him, I broke ties with my family. At that time, he was the reason why I shouted many angry remarks at my parents, but I was aware of how my relationship with my parents was never well. r7cKfO

Xiaocang has always been very concerned about this matter. He is under a lot of psychological pressure and always frowns unconsciously. He thinks that I should have a good talk with my parents. I said there is no need to talk, and I only want you.

“This always bothered Xiao Cang and put him under a lot of psychological pressure. He would always frown and bring up how I need to make up with my parents. I said there is nothing for me and my parents to talk about, I only want him.

“He sighed and gave up, while I kissed away the crease between his eyebrows.

“We have always been together, sharing the joys and sorrows of life, the ups and downs together. Once my company was established, I had to attend more social gatherings. Sometimes I drink deep into the night and return drunk. Xiao Cang would always wait for me, cook a bowl of soup to chase away the hangover, wash me, change my clothes and pat my head to coax me to sleep. CTAyaj

“He was someone great in my life…

“However, I cheated.

“This is indisputable. I actually never thought about it, I did not know how…In this luxurious life, debauched and corrupt environment, I caught this sickness, a serious one too…Otherwise, how could I be willing to hurt Qin Cang’s heart again and again, watch him collapse again and again. A life of living hell.

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

He said, let me let him go and try to live alone. I refused, and I knelt on the ground begging his forgiveness. He said I don’t love him anymore, how is this possible? I obviously love him so much, I hold him and refuse to let go. HINdlh

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“Facts proved that I was wrong. I really wanted to go back in time, find and kill my younger self. I should not have gone to see Xu Rui, I should have refused the wine he offered, as well as push him away not half-heartedly…These were not my opinions, there are facts. I was the one who pushed Xiao Cang into the abyss, with my own hands no less.

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I couldn’t find Qin Cang when I got home, and no one answered the phone. I had a bad feeling. I thought Qin Cang was going to leave me. I frantically searched for him, searched many places, and finally found him in the same hotel where I slept last night. The moment I saw him, my head buzzed, and the nerves inside were all confused.

“When I got home, I saw no sign of Qin Cang anywhere in the house, and he was not answering my phone either. I had a bad feeling. I thought Qin Cang was going to leave me so I frantically went out to look for him. I searched many places. In the end, I found him in the same hotel I stayed at the night before. The moment I saw him, everything in my head fizzled out into a buzz, every nerve that controlled my face was in a state of confusion. WTn3bl

“Being violated by another is already a great pain, even more being inflicted on top of that.

“Humiliation and HIV were like two mountains crushing down on Xiao Cang. It was not only physical pain, but also suffering in his mental spirit. He always said he was dirty and would take multiple showers. He did not allow me to touch him, even after I repeated loving words to him…

“But, Xai Cang did not trust me anymore.

“He developed clinical depression.” paIEA2

Yang Yiqian glanced at Wang Ran and said softly, “After you took him to the music festival.”

Wang Ran’s pupil suddenly dilated as she desperately tried to recall the scene before she met Qin Cang.

“Those comments and comments came flying all over the sky. Although he was calm on the face, they were actually piled up in his heart. Later, Xu Rui and my parents came to him, and he endured them silently. The accumulated negative emotions were layer upon layer. Stirring, he began to suffer from insomnia. Occasionally he fell asleep with difficulty, and had nightmares, and woke up crying every time. His mood continued to be depressed, and his reaction became slow. When I didn’t pay attention, he stopped resisting. Retroviral drugs.”

“With public comments as far as eyes could see swamped Qin Cang, they were piling up high in his heart even if he did not show it on his face. Later, Xu Rui and my parents came to find him. He suffered silently. The accumulated negative emotions stacked layer by layer. He began to lose sleep. During the time he finally fell asleep, he had nightmares and would wake up crying each time. His mood continued to drop and he began to lose his thoughts. Before I knew it, he stopped taking his antiretroviral medications.” o2gkI6

“!” Wang Ran’s voice trembled, “Was that why the virus worsened so quickly?”

Yang Yiqian lowered his eyes and nodded. “I took him to see a psychologist, but it was too late. Mental sickness accelerated the development of AIDS. The pneumocystis pneumonia he was diagnosed with, we were powerless to fight it.”

“Under the virus’s torture, he became weaker and weaker, and the pain I felt hurt more and more. If I could not save him, I might as well go with him.”

Wang Ran looked at the man in front of her. He was wearing a wrinkled suit, wet and soft black dress pants from kneeling on the ground. His head was lowered, as if his whole being was squeezed by the invisible burden. MTLUqx

She opened her mouth but no words came out.

He continued, “The night he died, I held his hand tightly and wanted to accompany him. However, I have to deal with his funeral. I am all he had left. I do not want his body to be treated wrongly. I have to send him off on his last ride.”

A smile appeared at the corner of Yang Yiqian’s lips. “I told him to wait for me. I do not know if I can make it in time.”

“Mr. Yang?!” c7Taxu

He waved his hand. “Go back. I am staying here to talk with my Xiao Cang a bit.”

Wang Ran looked at him anxiously and chose to stay here.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

The mountain air was moist and dense with fog. Yang Yiqian knelt in front of the tombstone and caressed Qin Cang’s picture. The man on the tombstone has bright eyes and teeth, like the light breeze and clear moon between the mountain, lifelike to the eyes.

In the twilight, Wang Ran took a deep look at Yang Yiqian, and finally left. She was just a listener, an outsider, and she couldn’t persuade anyone. After hearing this story, it’s time to end. srmTMS

At dusk, Wang Ran took a deep look at Yang Yiqian before finally leaving. She was like a listener and an outsider. She had no right to pursue him. This was where it ended for the spectator.

Yang Yiqian leaned against the tombstone. Gazing at the mountains, the village, the lonely moon, and the vast world…

“Xiao Cang, I had a dream last night that we became old wrinkly men. I was supporting you and you were leaning on me. We went to see dolphins together, won’t you like that? You always said you wanted to see them, but we never got the chance.”

“Xiao Cang, are you cold? Is the place you are at very cold? You are always prone to getting cold. Wait for me, Xiao Cang, in the next life, next life…” Mz9CQF

“In the next life, will you still love me? Will you still trust me?”

“It does not matter, Xiao Cang. It does not matter if you do not love me, but I will always love you back. I will cling to you and pester you. As long as you accept, we will get married and stay together all our life until we are old with white hair. Let’s go see the sunset together.”

“Xiao Cang…”

“Xiao Cang…I miss you…” eZ27cM

Tears rustled down, slided down the face and dropped into the soil. Enchanting red spider lilies appeared to the ground one after another, it was both beautiful and sad.

The mountains were covered with clouds and fog, this place was like it was isolated from the world. Yang Yiqian slowly closed his eyes.

The news of Yang Yiqian’s death came a month after Qin Cang’s death. Wang Ran was not surprised. She was prepared for it the night she left Qin Cang’s hometown.

But hearing it still brought her sadness, especially when she learned that Yang Yiqian died holding Qin Cang’s tombstone with his wrists cut. Once she knew, her tears finally fell as she covered her face to cry. lLfHc9

She had finally written a column about Qin Cang. She did not write the story of his struggle with HIV like the initial plan, she wrote the love story between Qin Cang and Yang Yiqian.

The story started so beautifully, contracted with all the tragic subsequent events, and resulted with an extremely broken ending. The story was inevitably sad and powerless. It took her seven days to write it, she also cried for seven days.

A picture is attached in the middle of the article, which is a picture of Qin Cang and Yang Yiqian kissing in front of the window of the ward. The light-colored curtain was gently lifted by the wind, and the sun was lazily falling on them, and their faces were shining in the sun Shenghui, like two gods using a kiss to redeem each other.

A picture was included in the middle of the article. It was a picture of Qin Cang and Yang Yiqian kissing in front of the ward window. The light coloured curtain was gently lifted by the wind. The sun was lazily covering them. Their faces shone in the sun, like two immortals saving each other with a kiss. cPkJ6g

And the last sentence of the article was,

In another way, they are still together, sleeping in the eternal night. 

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

End of the full text

No continuation. l tXU5

The author has something to say:

That’s the end of the story.

I wrote for eight days and cried for eight days. I don’t know what the reader’s state of mind is when reading this. When I typed this story, I was on the verge of crumbling. In my sleep, I tossed and turned restlessly. They appeared both inside and outside of my dream.

In addition, the novel is purely fictional, and I have tried my best to research information about HIV/ AIDS but I am not a professional, so there are bound to be mistakes. Please go easy on me. CkW6vo

If anyone likes my story, there will be more new ones. Welcome to follow and favourite them~

The translator has something to add:

Teo: The author actually has an account with jjwxc, but because this work of theirs keeps getting locked, I linked the page to gongzicp.

Afterthoughts: Anamirn, thank you so much for the ko-fi! 6whYE9