“…Okay. Where are you?” I grabbed my wallet and got out of the car.
He replied casually.
– I’m picking out ice cream.
I crossed the cool breeze blowing through the parking lot and entered the entrance of the large mart. Passing rows of carts, I went through the automatic doors. The mart, resembling a huge warehouse, was the size of a football field, and high shelves rose like walls of a maze, blocking the view.
“Where is the ice cream?”
– Just follow the aisle. There’s a frozen food section near the exit.
I passed through the vegetable corner piled with fruits, and also passed by the meat and cheese corner where I could feel the chill. Many people were standing in front of the shelves with their carts, but he wasn’t visible. There was a sound like crackling coming from the phone. His voice spoke.
– If you see anything you want, just grab it.
“…Okay.”
I passed by rows of stacked snacks, most of which were unfamiliar products. I walked past them but then turned back and grabbed a bag with potato chips in it. The price was written in red, indicating it was on sale.
“Oh.”
As I turned the corner, I saw his back in the distance. Leaning against the cart with his phone to his ear, he stood in front of a glass display case filled with frozen foods.
My heart stopped for a moment as if it had dropped, then started beating again. The sight of him emerged in vivid colors.
– What flavor of ice cream should we get?
He asked, picking up and then putting down a tub from the freezer.
“I don’t mind…”
– Vanilla?
“Well… that’s not really Team Leader’s preference, is it?”
– Who said it isn’t.
He chuckled as if incredulous.
I hesitated as I approached him stealthily with the cart. Various groceries, including onions, meat, fruits, and ice, were piled heavily on the cart.
I carefully placed the bag of potato chips on the piled-up food. When the bag rustled, he turned his head. His face, which seemed cold at first, softened as he spotted me.
“Did you sleep well?”
“…Yes.”
His affectionate eyes were unwavering. It was as if everything that had happened during the day, slightly faded and blurred by sleep, was now all real.
Han Team Leader hung up the phone, put his phone in his pocket, and gestured to me. His arm wrapped around my waist.
“Come here. Will this size be okay?”
“Yes. It might even be too much…”
“Better to have more than less. Did you want anything else? Is this it?”
He lifted the corner of the potato chip bag.
“Will you cook for me, Team Leader?”
“It’s an accommodation with cooking facilities, and we’ve had enough eating out for two weeks. I’ll keep it simple since we’re short on time.”
“Okay.”
Although it didn’t look simple at all, from the ingredients, having experienced his cooking style a few times, I obediently stepped aside from the cart.
Han Team Leader put the tub of vanilla ice cream into the cart and headed towards the checkout counter. Groceries such as potatoes, onions, and butter kept coming out of the cart.
“Do you like peaches?”
He asked, placing four ripe peaches with a tempting pink hue on the checkout counter.
“I’m not sure, I’ve never tried them.”
“Then you’ll try them today.”
The barcode beeped, and the bag was stacked full again in the cart. While waiting, I looked at the colorful gums and candies next to the checkout counter and accidentally met his eyes.
“Should I get those?”
Like an adult who had gone grocery shopping with a child, he asked leisurely. My face flushed at his smiling face.
“Just curious what’s available…”
“You’ll keep wondering until you try it.”
Our shoulders touched. He now almost finished placing the defective items by category on the checkout counter. I was taken aback and grabbed his arm.
“I can’t eat all of these.”
“Take them and eat slowly. They’re not good for you anyway.”
Candy bars, gum, and jelly went onto the checkout counter. The employee scanning them showed no change in expression.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
While Han Team Leader finished the checkout, I grabbed the cart handle first. Since he had been pushing it the whole time, I intended to push it to the parking lot, but before I could take a few steps, his hand appeared next to mine. When I turned around, he was there, holding the cart handles on both sides as if enclosing me between his arms.
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***
When I opened the door to the accommodation, I saw two familiar suitcases standing side by side next to it. One was sky blue, and the other was black.
“Weren’t you just checking in earlier?”
Han Team Leader, who was taking the grocery bag from my hand and putting it in the kitchen, said incredulously.
“I asked if you wanted to go together, and you said you would be in the car, remember?”
“…I must have answered while half asleep.”
I didn’t even remember. As I looked around the villa-like accommodation, I felt a little disappointed. Along the walls, several large arched windows overlooked the sandy beach and the sea. Even the sunset scenery was so beautiful that I wished I had gone outside with him to walk around while it was still bright.
Han Team Leader turned on the kitchen lights while transferring the groceries to the fridge. The interior, decorated in clean white and blue, was revealed.
In the living room connected to the kitchen, there was a spacious fabric sofa surrounding a fireplace, and on the windowsill where the wall curved inward, there were window seats with cushions. It seemed deliberately decorated, as there were many trinkets on the shelf above the fireplace and the bookshelf by the window was full of books.
“Just take a look around and relax.”
Rolling up his shirt sleeves to his elbows, he said. His black apron was tied around his waist as he checked the kitchen cabinets.
“It won’t be much help, really. Just sit and read a book.”
He rummaged through the plastic bags from the mart and suddenly stood up. I caught something flying towards me out of reflex. It was a bag containing squishy jelly.
“Don’t eat too much of it.”
“…Okay.”
I took out the charger from my bag and looked for a wall socket while wandering around. The bedroom I ended up visiting was a cozy space with a large bed, sofas, cushions, and delicately arranged decorations.
The sea visible through the window seemed to be very close. I untied the curtain and opened one side of the window slightly, feeling the cool sea breeze. I could hear the sound of waves breaking on the shore.
When I came out of the bedroom, I heard the rhythmic sound of chopping vegetables already coming from the kitchen. I stood a few steps away so as not to disturb him and watched him cooking. Then I went to the bedroom, picked up the slightly charged phone, and came out again.
“…Why are you taking pictures again?”
He turned his head and, facing the lens of my phone camera, said incredulously.
“Isn’t this a video, not a photo?”
“Han Team Leader, what are you making today?”
I captured his neat fingers holding the dismantled peaches and the handle of the kitchen knife on the chopping board. Then I looked back at the screen, where his face looked resignedly smiling.
“I’m grilling steaks, caramelizing onions and peaches. Also making a salad.”
“I see. What goes into the salad?”
“The salad also includes peaches. It has baby spinach and roasted nuts as well.”
“There seem to be a lot of peaches everywhere. What stage are we at now?”
“We’re in the midst of preparing the ingredients. How long are you going to keep shooting?”
A large, handsome hand reached out and covered the lens. I took a step back and took a picture of the oven with the flame on and the red meat on one side of the plate.
Meanwhile, he was precisely quartering the red onions with a red peel. Every time his arm moved, the muscles in his back, barely visible under the thin shirt, rippled delicately.
“Han Team Leader, how do you feel about the trip we took today?”
“…Feelings?”
He turned around and instantly grabbed my phone. Clattering, the snatched phone rolled onto the kitchen counter. Then he pulled me close and pressed me against the sink. Our firm thighs touched, and our faces were dangerously close.
“What feelings?”
With hands smelling of onions, he cupped my cheek. Our hot lips met. I closed my eyes and reached out to feel his back with my fingertips as we kissed. A dizzying sensation ran through me to the tips of my toes.
Our lips made a wet sound as they parted. He lightly kissed my closed eyelids and pushed me away.
“Go and amuse yourself now.”
I retrieved my phone and retreated backward out of the kitchen. I saved the ongoing video and brought a book to sit on the spacious seat by the window.
Behind me, the sky was painted with dark purple hues. I placed a large cushion on my lap and unfolded the book on it, watching him in the kitchen. It seemed like I wouldn’t get bored watching him for hours.
Fundamentally, he was a person with straight lines in his body, and all his movements were neat and without any clutter. Whether it was the angle of his wrist handling the hot frying pan or the muscles in his arms and shoulders tensing when lifting a heavy tray, they were as beautiful as anatomy textbook illustrations.
By the time the food was almost ready, he allowed me to set the table with forks and knives. In the kitchen, there was a warm and fragrant smell, as if ripe fruits were being crushed, and the aroma of peaches roasting in the oven, along with the scent of wine he had decanted.
“What about the steak?”
He put two small, round steaks into the oven and asked.
“I prefer… medium.”
As soon as the oven opened, a rush of heat and the fragrant smell of fruits filled the air. On the counter were bowls of salad and mashed potatoes. I kept pacing around and eventually grabbed a spoonful of mashed potatoes from his hand. Meanwhile, the finished steaks were sliced to the right thickness and placed on a white plate.
“Shall I bring it over?”
“Just bring the salad. Sit down now. I’ll take care of the rest.”
Outside the window, darkness had already fallen. I brought the salad and wine glasses to the dining table and sat down on the chair.
He soon brought two plates to the table. The diagonally sliced steak revealed its tempting pink interior, and next to it were browned peaches and onions, sprinkled with herbs, along with mashed potatoes. Distracted by the sight, he said to me,
“Now you should take pictures.”
His eyes were folded as if they were visible and audible at the same time.
I immediately took out my phone and took a picture of the plates. As I lifted the phone slightly, now accustomed to it, he looked at the lens with an indifferent expression.
It was a perfect dinner to end a perfect day. Perhaps that’s why I ended up drinking two glasses of wine he poured just for me, and despite feeling full, I still ate less of the salad and potatoes.
For dessert, Han Team Leader took out perfectly baked peaches from the oven and topped them with vanilla ice cream. The thick, sweet sauce drizzled over them had the taste of brown sugar, and there was a subtle scent of alcohol.
“Lee Seodan.”
As he was tidying up the oven, he clapped his hands in front of my face. I snapped out of my trance and barely caught the plate that almost slipped into the sink.
“You’ll break something if you keep doing the dishes like that. Just sit down.”
“…No, it’s okay.”
“What’s okay?”
“No, it’s fine.”
I refused to move back and held onto the plate tightly. Even though I couldn’t help him at all while he was cooking, I felt like I should at least do the dishes.
“You’re washing with just water without detergent.”
He pointed out.
“What’s wrong with that? Why did you set aside only the wine glasses?”
“There’s some left.”
He finally snatched the scrubbing sponge from my hand. The remaining wine I was trying to save was poured down the sink. As I was pushed back, I staggered a step and successfully sat on his lap. His leg that touched my hot cheek was firm and stable.
“How much did you drink?”
He muttered, looking down at me with a face that I couldn’t tell if he was laughing or annoyed. I grabbed the strap of his apron swaying in front of my eyes. It seemed unnecessary to do the dishes.
“Lee Seodan.”
“……”
“Lee Seodan.”
His face approached, and his hand under my armpit lifted me up. I leaned my sobbing body against his sturdy chest and was carried to the living room sofa. He leaned me against the backrest and stared at me silently, then pressed his finger firmly against my forehead.
“We can’t go for a walk.”
“We can.”
“We can’t.”
“We can…”
“Don’t stand up, just sit.”
He went back to the kitchen and opened the fridge. Soon, a cold glass was placed in my hand. There was the sound of ice clinking. I quietly took two sips of the ice water and stood up, carrying the glass to the kitchen.
“Why are you back?”
He turned around, almost finished with the dishes.
“This too…”
I offered him the glass, and he took it from me. The cold back of his hand touched my cheek.
“Why do you keep smiling?”
“Ah…”
“Even when you’re drunk, you’re unnecessarily pretty.”
His moist fingertips touched my lips. His eyes looking down at me were affectionate. This time, he didn’t stop me from sitting on his lap. I fiddled with the apron that had fallen to the floor and listened to the sound of water and foam coming from above my head. Occasionally, I reached out to touch his calf and ankle. The taut curve of the Achilles tendon connecting from the ankle to the heel was visible above the shoe.
With my cheek against his thigh, I softly called him.
“Han Team Leader….”
“What?”
His voice sounded slightly annoyed and lazy.
I couldn’t remember what I wanted to say, so I just lay there, holding onto his leg. The momentarily stopped sound of water resumed.
“Han Team Leader.”
“…Are you calling me because you have something to say, or just calling me?”
“……”
In a house like this, in this scenery.
It seemed okay even if it wasn’t such a good place. Even without the sea, fireplace, or cozy window seat. His house with the night view and sound system was also fine. Even my own house without a sofa seemed okay.
“I want to live with Han Team Leader….”
The sound of water above my head stopped abruptly. The cheek that had touched his pants fell away. He looked down at me with a blatantly puzzled expression.
“I told you to move in. Several months ago.”
“……”
“First of all, you practically spend half of the week sleeping at my place. And now you call that nothing… Did you know I’ve been waiting for you to make up your mind, Lee Seodan?”
He rose abruptly. Grabbing onto my trembling shoulders, he pushed me against the sink. His fingers digging into my shoulders were so strong that it hurt, and his eyes meeting mine up close didn’t hide the irritation.
“You leave saying you’ll catch the last train, refuse when I offer to drive you, openly discuss renewing the lease for the apartment in front of me… and now you’re asking what we should do, now?”
“…We might break up.”
“What?”
“With time, I might no longer be visible to Team Leader. Even if it’s not now, it’s something that might happen in life… due to various reasons…”
I had to exert effort to pronounce the words correctly. His angry face was blurry, and I was feeling dizzy. I struggled to breathe.
“So, if Team Leader tells me to leave… So if I live with Team Leader and then end up alone again…”
“….”
“I don’t think that would be… possible.”
It would be unbearable at that moment. I wouldn’t be able to stand up again. I wasn’t that strong of a person anyway. The loneliness and pain of being left alone that I had learned so far would be nothing compared to what I would experience then.
He lifted my collapsing body. My waist was held, and my cheek hit his shoulder. I hugged him, breathing in his scent like oxygen, and closed my eyes.
“Pack your things as soon as we get back to Korea.”
He carried me to the bedroom, laid me down on the bed, and said. His voice was firm, as if announcing something already decided.
“No, I’ll handle the luggage separately. Same goes for the contract.”
“…Ugh.”
“If the problem is that the house is in my name, I’ll transfer it to Lee Seodan’s name. If you can’t believe my word that there won’t be a breakup, then put it in your family register or write a contract, whatever makes Lee Seodan feel secure.”
His cold hand wrapped around my cheek, and I leaned my face into it. The space between words and words seemed to stretch out like cheese. I could smell the scent of detergent and the sweet scent of baked peaches from him.
With the last bit of strength, I reached out my arms and hugged him. I pulled down his heavy body over mine. The weight and warmth. It was an absolute sense of security that couldn’t be explained in words.
“Anyway, I… like Team Leader more….”
I felt him laugh softly against my chest. His lips touched my messy hair.
“If Lee Seodan can look into my mind.”
“…Hmm.”
“You won’t say such things.”
The feeling of lips touching my forehead, eyelids, nose tip, and lips, and the pleasant sound of them falling away slowly seeped into my ears. I fell asleep while being embraced by him like a blanket. The tenderness of the strokes on my head and the affectionate gaze remained piled up inside me like warmth, as if I could wake up again in the morning, as if nothing would disappear even if I closed my eyes.
***
“Lee Seodan.”
He was in my dream, and his voice calling my name was there.
“It’s time to wake up. It’s lunchtime.”
So when I opened my eyes, I couldn’t tell if his neat face was a dream or reality. The room was bright. When I stayed still, a long finger came down and lightly shook my chin.
“You need to wake up.”
“…Ugh…”
My head hurt. As I furrowed my brow, he supported my upper body, handed me a cold glass, and said:
“Drink it, and if it doesn’t work, take some medicine. There’s no hangover remedy, but there’s headache medicine.”
The water was clear and cold. The floating ice was familiar. I drank all the water and recalled the dinner he had prepared for me last night. I remembered one thing after another that I had done after drinking two glasses of wine. Still, I was grateful that I didn’t throw up the meal he had prepared.
“…Team Leader.”
There was a hint of laughter in his eyes as he looked at my expression.
“Understood. Get up, wash up, and come out for breakfast.”
As he disappeared through the open door, I turned my head. The sky and the sea outside the window were of a similar blue color, and the sun was already high in the sky.
Opening the door led directly to the sandy beach. The palm trees seemed so close I could almost grab them.
