TW: suicidal ideation
Fan Jialuo originally planned to go home early, but he chatted with Song Rui until the waiter came to clear the venue. The banquet had already ended, and the guests had already left one after another. Only the numerous cups and plates on the tables proved that the place had been noisy.
“I didn’t realize it was so late.” Fan Jialuo was dumbfounded. This was the first time he had forgotten the time while chatting.
“Let’s go, I’ll take you home.” Song Rui naturally placed his arm around his shoulders.
When the two of them passed by the atrium, they saw a group of well-dressed young people still lingering in the garden. They were huddled together, staring at one of their cell phones with great interest. The sound of women cursing, screaming, and crying came from the phone.
“Holy shit, what a scene!” the person holding the phone said with a smile.
“Hey, Fan Jialuo is here! He’s the one who caused this incident!”
“Fan Jialuo, Miss Zhao is currently catching the mistress, do you want to watch the live broadcast?” the person holding the cell phone stretched out his neck and shouted, turning the phone screen in the direction of the corridor, so when Fan Jialuo walked out, he was greeted by the sight of the woman in the fancy dress walking into the flamboyantly dressed man’s cloakroom, pulling out his shirts one by one and turning up the collars.
The mistress was really arrogant, and she had secretly printed a lip mark on almost every shirt he had worn but hadn’t washed. Those bright red, rose, or light pink lip prints were like a heavy hammer, and the woman in the fancy dress felt as though her dignity and face were hit until there was nothing left.
She threw the shirts to the ground and stomped on them carelessly, and when she was done, she went to tear at the mistress who was being held by the hair by her good friend. The flamboyantly dressed man was trying to persuade her, but she couldn’t be persuaded, and the mistress could only hug her head and scream. He used to be “Fan Jialuo’s” best friend, but he was also the most ruthless one after he fell from grace.
Fan Jialuo never bothered to read the humiliating text messages that the man had sent every day and deleted them, but at this time, he stared at the man’s face covered in palm marks and let out a rare chuckle.
Realizing that he was gloating, Song Rui couldn’t help but follow suit and laugh as well. The two stood at the edge of the atrium, staring intently at the phone. The person who stopped them originally wanted to make a joke to tease them, but at this time he could only obediently hold up the phone, treating himself as a lifeless human support frame.
Only when he got closer did he realize that Fan Jialuo was completely different from the rumors. He could be inconspicuous, just like how when he walked along the corridor, others would only focus on Song Rui beside him. However, once he focused on something and revealed his presence, everyone would consciously or unconsciously follow him around.
This man’s temperament was too extraordinary! While the young man was silently reminiscing about Fan Jialuo’s blooming beauty, the other party had already been pulled away by Song Rui, and the live broadcast of the woman in the fancy dress catching the mistress had come to an end. The flamboyantly dressed man was kneeling on the ground at this moment, and was slapped on the head by his mother, who suddenly broke into the villa. For the moment, it was still unknown whether the engagement would be canceled.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“Fan Jialuo was really gutsy today, daring to curse Fan Kaixuan to death!” a young man said excitedly after turning off his phone.
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Xu Yiyang didn’t know why he stopped, so he gently tugged at the hem of his shirt.
“You spread out your finished homework on the table first. I’ll go out for a while, and I’ll check it for you when I come back.” He bent over and rubbed the little boy’s head, his voice full of tenderness and apology.
“Big brother, you go! I can do it!” Xu Yiyang patted his soft chest.
“Okay, then I’m going. I’ll be back within ten minutes for sure,” Fan Jialuo pointed to his watch and promised, then turned and went out. He strode back as if he had remembered something, taking down the small bottle hanging from the balcony, stuffing a few flying insects into the fish tank.
As the door closed, he could hear Xu Yiyang sweetly saying “goodbye” and the crisp croaks of the frog, and his thin lips finally raised into a curve. When he got to the rooftop, his expression became serious once again, and he turned his indifferent gaze onto Qu Xianfen, who was standing on the edge of the rooftop.
“Ms. Qu, are you still planning on committing suicide?” As he asked, he noiselessly walked up to the woman’s side, but he did not pull her back. Instead, he lowered his head to look down the 60 or 70 meter tall building. The thick yin and evil qi rose into the sky, giving birth to further human greed, evil, and selfish desires, and also amplifying their inner despair.
“Mr. Fan, don’t come here!” Qu Xianfen moved to a more precarious place and cried, “My husband came back with the divorce papers tonight. I have nothing left, and my son is not willing to talk to me. I’m at the end of my rope! I just want to be with my grandma and mom now. Didn’t you say that they are always watching me from heaven? If I also go to heaven, then they should be very happy!”
Imagining herself turning back into an innocent and lovely little girl, throwing herself into the arms of her grandma and mom, and living a carefree life, a smile filled with great longing blossomed on Qu Xianfen’s tear-stained face. Death had become the ultimate relief for her. She was not afraid of death, and she even couldn’t wait to die.
This time, no matter who persuaded her, it was useless. If she wanted to regain the beauty of her past, she could only choose this desperate path.
Fan Jialuo, who had always strategized in a calm and collected manner, covered his forehead for once with a helpless expression.
Qu Xianfen trembled as the tips of her toes dangled off the tall building. Fan Jialuo had already slowly taken two steps back, choosing to give up. He was not a god, and he couldn’t save everyone. If she herself was unable to regain hope, then she would continue to walk towards the abyss of death. He could save her once or twice, but he couldn’t save her three times, four times, or even a lifetime.
At this moment, the door to the roof was pushed open, and Xu Yiyang walked over in a pair of large slippers that obviously didn’t belong to him. He whispered, “Brother, I’m sleepy.”
Seeing the pale child, who could no longer enjoy delicious food, intimate love, or friendship like a living person, and could only live a lonely life away from everyone, Fan Jialuo’s deep and indifferent gaze was again tinted with a layer of warmth. He sighed helplessly and said slowly, “I can give you a way to live. Do you want it?”
“What way to live?” Qu Xianfen asked without hope.
“Ask your husband to draft a new divorce agreement that leaves you with some property to live off of in the future.”
“That’s impossible. Before we got married, he had protected all his property. Their family loves money more than their lives, so it is impossible for them to give me a penny! Did you know that their family is not even allowed to flush the toilet, and they can only flush it when they go to bed at night. Everyone’s shit and piss are piled up together, a big bucket of it, causing the bathroom to reek. Can you imagine such a scene? Of course, they must not care, because the one who cleans the toilet every day is me, so the one who must endure the foul smell is also me. What does it matter to them? They just need to enjoy their lives. But I can’t even die without this kind of home, because if I leave, I will feel worse than death. I no longer have the ability to survive independently, and have become a useless person. I have failed my grandma and mom’s expectations for me. I regret it so much. If I could start over in life, I would not have married Pan Dawei, I would definitely study hard and learn the piano well, but there’s no starting over in life…”
Qu Xianfen grabbed the railing and laughed softly, but it was unknown who she was laughing at.
“I said I would give you a way to live, so come down.” Fan Jialuo waved at Qu Xianfen while pressing his fingertips between his eyebrows, and drawing out a gray light the size of a grain of rice.
Seeing the tiny light floating in the air, Qu Xianfen was stunned and murmured, “What’s that?”
“This is something that can make your wishes come true. Do you think there is no way out after divorce? Go back and sleep, and tomorrow you will have the power to change your destiny after waking up. But you only have one day, so you must make a choice, whether to drag these people with you to sink into hell, or to give up everything and begin a new life. I hope that after tomorrow, you can tell me your final choice. Break away from your current perspective and take a look at your current life from someone else’s perspective, and you might find a completely different answer.”
As the young man spoke, the gray light floated up and down at his fingertips, like the only light in a pitch black night, attracting Qu Xianfen to approach. Unknowingly, she left the dangerously high platform, jumping to the ground and reaching out her hand to grab..
The gray grain of light disappeared in her palm. She snapped awake and asked in amazement, “Mr. Fan, what happened just now?” She looked around, spinning back and forth as she felt her body up and down. She was confused as to what the vanishing light was, and why she voluntarily gave up on the idea of suicide. She had wanted to die so badly just now, but now she wanted to go home immediately and resolve the divorce papers. Her mind was blank as to how to resolve them, but she was somehow convinced that she would be able to achieve her wish.
What’s going on here? Mr. Fan is really a bit unusual! He really is a psychic! While Qu Xianfen was trapped in her chaotic thoughts, Fan Jialuo was already leading Xu Yiyang, who was so sleepy that he was rubbing his eyes, away slowly.
Qu Xianfen let the cold wind on the roof blow her for a while, wiping away her tears and snot before returning to her home on the fourth floor. Li Lan, who was warmly welcomed by the whole family, had already left. It seemed that her skin wasn’t thick enough to share a room with the original wife.
Her in-laws had long since gone to bed, while her son was still playing games in the study. His parents’ divorce had no effect on him, since he was used to hearing his grandparents belittle his mother since he was a child. He was also used to seeing his mother being humiliated by the family, so he had already developed the idea that she was simply the most humble existence in the family.
Would the departure of a dispensable person make him sad? Obviously not. This was why some children were able to raise a butcher’s knife and kill their mothers without hesitation. The denial of a woman’s personal value by their social environment would have an extremely negative impact on a child.
Qu Xianfen put her ear to the door of the study and silently listened to what her son was doing. She did this often, not to spy on her son, but because she was so eager to know what was going on in her son’s life. She thought that she would be able to build a close mother-son relationship with him after getting to know him well enough.
However, it turned out that this was just her wishful thinking. Her son was too impatient to talk to her, and his grandparent’s influence was too large. If she took her son after the divorce and lived with him for a few years, everything would be fine, right?
Thinking of this, Qu Xianfen placed her hands on the door and began to smile while shedding tears. The only thing that kept her in this family was her son, and she felt that she couldn’t live after divorce because her son didn’t want to live with her. If her son agreed to go with her, she would even find it sweet to eat porridge and flavorless vegetables. She could muster all her courage to build a home for her son! She couldn’t live alone. She had to find a spiritual pillar for herself, because although she had grown up on the surface, internally she was still stuck in the happiest period of her early childhood, and she wanted to go back to the past.
Hearing the sound of her son laughing with his online friends, Qu Xianfen’s erratic gaze gradually grew firm. She pushed open the door of the guest room, approached her husband, who was snoring with his eyes closed, and placed her palm on his oily forehead…
The next day, Qu Xianfnen woke up as early as 5:30 a.m., but stood still in front of the full-length mirror for a long time. She was horrified to find that she was in her husband’s body, while her own body was lying on the bed, breathing weakly with her eyes closed. She pushed her own body and saw that she didn’t move, and vaguely understood what was going on.
This was what Mr. Fan said about giving her a way to live, right? She had become her husband, so she could use his identity to do things her former self couldn’t do, such as amending the divorce papers, re-dividing the property, regain custody of her son, and so on.
Qu Xianfen’s heart began to beat violently. She couldn’t wait to fish out the thin divorce papers from the drawer, and quickly flipped through them a few times. Yesterday, under the triple coercion of her in-laws and her husband, she had no choice but to sign the papers. She still remembered Li Lan’s expression as she pretended to pity her, and her husband’s satisfied expression.
Her hands shook slightly as she held the divorce papers. She wanted to tear them up, but she knew it would be pointless since the lawyer had a copy, and it had already been filed. If she wanted to overturn everything, she would have to ask the lawyer to draw up a new agreement and have it notarized. Therefore, she quickly opened her husband’s cellphone with her fingerprint and searched for the lawyer’s phone number.
No one was answering the phone at this time, so they were probably still sleeping. Qu Xianfen felt as though her fiery heart had a ladle of water poured on it, and only now did she finally regain her calm. She placed her body upright on the bed and covered herself with the quilt before she began to check her husband’s various social media accounts, which was something she had never even dared to think about before.
[Baby, we will get married as soon as I divorce that yellow-faced woman!]
[Will she take away your property? You have so many shares in your company!]
[No, I made arrangements when I married her so that she wouldn’t get a penny. I knew from the beginning that she was a fisherman. She refused to go to study at a good university and only begged to marry me with a big belly, why else would she do that besides my riches! If my mother hadn’t taken her for an ultrasound and found out that she was pregnant with a son, do you think she would have been able to enter my Pan family’s door? I was on guard against her for a long time!]
[Honey, don’t say that. At least she was your family’s nanny for more than ten years. It’s not easy to work hard all day long.]
[That’s what she wanted to do. If she didn’t marry me, then she wouldn’t have such a good life now. I don’t know where she would have gone to slave away.]
Qu Xianfen didn’t read the rest of the words, because her eyes were already blurred by tears. It turned out that when she got married, this was how her husband saw her—a girl who abandoned everything in order to marry into a wealthy family! Her so-called abandonment of her studies and ideals was actually worthless in his eyes, far less important than the gender of the child in her belly. Who cared about her sacrifice? Who remembered all that she had given to them?
If she hadn’t married into the Pan family, she wouldn’t have her current good life? But did she really have a good life now? Did she have beautiful clothes? Were there delicacies to eat? Had she ever been loved or respected? Qu Xianfen no longer felt embarrassed or pained, and the more she thought about it, the more ridiculous she felt!
Looking at her past from her husband’s perspective, she finally realized that she was a joke from the beginning to end! But what was even more ridiculous was that the only person who could tell that her life wasn’t easy was Li Lan, the mistress she hated most, not those so-called family members who she had given everything to.
Ty for the chapter ❤️❤️❤️
Haha, better get herself more and totally cut of their ill-fated relationship cleanly.
Qu Xianfan, Take it all as payment for your hard work. Jiayou!!!
Go girl, anywhere is better than your current place. Leaving what you know for finding what you don’t, it is scary, but when this is what you know…. it’s worth it.
And Xianfen’s helplessness is something many people have in countless situations. That feeling of only your ignorant childhood being a blessing, and everything else just smashing you down like hailing rocks, that desperation of wanting to stop existing so you don’t have to feel anymore… Sorry, I think I started projecting, but this story really has the ability to pull you in.
Just like Fan Jialuo 🙂
I’m totally rooting for her!!