Pr/editor: Helen, Raven
The banquet was filled with laughter, wine, and the sound of musical instruments.
Erhart sat on his throne, seeming bored while watching men and women gathered in groups of three or four to speak or dance joyously in pairs. The banquet hall was as lively as ever. It was a victory party for a troublesome kingdom that had been brought to its knees by Hesseles.
The trumpets of improvement, the praise of the Emperor for leading them to a perfect victory, the pollen scattered everywhere, and now this party to celebrate the victory. All of this was incredibly annoying, but Erhart stayed firm.
“Your Majesty.”
The liquor slid down his throat, roughly, and it was poisonous. Feeling his head pinging, Erhart proceeded to moisten his lips rather than setting his glass down.
“Marielle. I wonder if it’s not too long for a lady who hasn’t yet made her debut to stay.”
Marielle frowned at the bluntness of his words. Still, now that she was 13 years old, she wasn’t as short-tempered as she had been in the past.
“Well, since there’s no empress at court, I’ll have to play hostess, even if I haven’t even had my debut.”
Her tongue had sharpened considerably.
He’d only been away from the palace for half a year at most, fighting a war, and the child had grown up in that short time. Or perhaps Marielle’s growth wasn’t so rapid after all, given that it took three years of conquering wars for her to reach the age of thirteen, and less than a year of peace in the palace.
“You’ve had your first dance with me, so you’ve done your part. So if you’re feeling sleepy, go to bed.”
“…”
“You have to grow up, quickly. Ah, yes. I hope your studies are going well?”
At the mention of calling in her teachers tomorrow to ask if she was making progress, Marielle crumpled the hem of her dress as if pressing down a surge of emotion. Her pure white face, buried in her waist-length blonde hair, flushed red with anger.
“I’ll take care of that.”
Gingerly, Marielle retorted, unable to control her temper.
“Don’t show your emotions like that. It is the demeanor of a lord.”
“Why should I…. Never mind. I don’t think I’ll be the only one tired if I have to talk to Your Majesty anymore. I came here out of concern that you’ve been drinking too much, and all I got was a bunch of nagging.”
Erhart looked at the goblet in front of him. It was barely his third glass. He hadn’t drunk enough to warrant anyone’s interruption. As he tilted his glass and shrugged, Marielle snorted and muttered.
“Rayan was kind.”
“…”
“Of course he rejected my confession… Ah…”
Marielle blurted out the words he hadn’t expected to be heard, but stopped herself when she saw the look on Erhart’s face. His face, which had shown the slightest hint of emotion, became expressionless. With a clink, Erhart set down his glass and straightened up. Marielle glared as she backed away from him.
“I brought him up because…”
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“P xcbk.”
“…”
“P xcbk atja sbe vlvc’a wfjc ab.”
Sgtjga tjvc’a jiibkfv tfg ab wfcalbc jcsatlcu jybea Ejsjc rlcmf tf vlrjqqfjgfv atgff sfjgr jub. Lf kjr j gewbg jcskjs, jcv atbrf ktb jmaejiis xcfk tlw kfgf ofk jcv ojg yfakffc, rb j mbega jmmerabwfv ab ubrrlq delmxis obguba jybea tlw.
Of course, as Marielle resisted, searching for Rayan and inquiring where he had gone, eventually joined the silent procession at some point. Perhaps that was one of the signs that the child had somewhat grown up.
“You’re right, I’ve had too much to drink. I must rest, and you must return to the palace in due time.”
He sobered up as if cold water had been poured at him, but he used alcohol as an excuse. This party was not going to end anytime soon. After giving Marielle his orders, Erhart returned to the palace.
Jurgen listened to him with familiarity. Changing into his gown, Erhart withdrew those standing by him.
“…”
Clutching the railing of the balcony, Erhart stood in silence as he manipulated his powers. When he closed his eyes and opened them, a familiar salty odor stung his nostrils.
The crash of the waves.
It was Arhen.
He felt dizzy and had a headache for a moment because of the enormous amount of energy that he had used to cover the distance, but he chewed on his lip and eventually felt better. Erhart stared out at the moonlit sea with intense longing in his eyes.
“Rayan.”
He managed something resembling a smile. But he couldn’t hide the bitterness in his voice as he whispered the name of his lover, who was at peace beneath the vast great waters.
“…”
He had barely said his name, and a wave of emotion washed over him. Clenching and unclenching his fists, as his breath caught in his throat, Erhart strode down the cliff to the sandy shore.
Slowly, as if no one was listening, he spoke about himself: why he had gone to battle, how he had won… and what he had been thinking about all that time.
For three years, Erhart did this regularly, listening to the waves and sending his regards to Rayan. He knew none of this would reach him, but it was the least he could do to make it bearable.
“By the way, Marielle has grown up quite a bit.”
It appeared that she was developing slowly, yet looking back, she had grown significantly. Although her mentors reported to Erhart, they could not hide their doubts about how to teach imperial studies to the princess.
“And yet she is still so naive. I wish she would grow up so that she could inherit everything.”
Erhart intended to pass everything on to Marielle. There hadn’t been a queen for a long time, so it wasn’t out of the question that Marielle would sit on the throne one day.
“I hope she grows up soon, so that…”
He could follow him to eternal rest.
He wanted him to be happy for a long time, never sad, always smiling, and to think of him occasionally, but Erhart could not keep any of these promises. He was sad every day, unable to be happy or smile. Every day he thought about Rayan. He was so sick of living without his loved one.
He endured it for three years. During that time, everything in the world was colorless. There was no spring, no summer, no autumn, it was all like a bleak winter. He always wanted to follow him, but he reminded himself of the promise he made to Rayan.
Erhart thought of it as a punishment. To wait as long as Rayan had waited for him in this strange land, or maybe even longer, and when he thought of it that way, it became a little more bearable.
“When the time comes, don’t say I broke my promise, Rayan.”
He told him to be happy, not that he cannot follow him.
“…”
As he watched the crashing waves, he reached the place that had once been their sanctuary, the place where Rayan had stayed while he waited for him.
He came to Arhen whenever he missed him, but he could count on one hand the number of times he came here. Watching the fading breath and thinking about Ryan, who risked his life, and recalling his longing for him while waiting for him here was as painful as if it was painted.
Erhart rolled the bracelet he had made from Rayan’s tears and the broken artifact in his hand. It was something he often did to keep his emotions at bay.
If he didn’t do this, he might put a gun to his head right now.
“No. Maybe I should.”
He was already a prisoner, and he already met the deadline that he had set for himself. So, why not have his way? There was no future in his mind. The glory of the Empire didn’t exist.
Perhaps it was because of the intoxication. Impulse overrode reason. A sweet, self-destructive desire ruled him. Erhart slowly pointed the gun he always carried, on his head.
If only he could pull the trigger.
“…”
That’s how Erhart would be happy for a long time. He will never be sad. He could even laugh heartily if he wanted to.
Swish… slosh…
The sound of the waves crashing against the rocks pounded in his ears. Slowly, the sound faded into the distance, and he tightened his finger on the trigger.
“Er… ich.”
A dreadful, haunting hallucination reverberated.
“Ha..” Erhart couldn’t help but chuckle, resenting the voice that hadn’t appeared in his dreams for three years after he’d begged for it. Still, he missed him and…
“Erich.”
The voice called Erhart once more.
He did not want to look back. Barely, had he permitted himself to die. The instant he cave in to the voice, he would be back on this boring wheel of life.
“El. Are you sure you won’t look at me?”
“…”
“Hm? I want to see your face.”
The vision was real. Missing him? Feeling sorry for him?
Erhart felt terrible, yet he couldn’t help but look back. For once, even if it meant delaying his own death, he desired to see him, even if it meant seeing a vision of him that never came.
He turned.
Black hair fell on his chest, and his tears glistened with dampness.
“Erich.”
He was dreaming. He was dreaming with his eyes open. How could that be an illusion? The hand holding the gun dropped limply. Clatter. The gun fell to the floor.
“…I kept you waiting for too long.”
“…”
“Sorry. I’m sorry.”
At last, Rayan looked at Erhart and sobbed, his tears falling on the ground and becoming pearls.
“Ah…”
By then, he seemed real, not an illusion. Erhart couldn’t help but run to him. Even if he was a mirage that would vanish the moment he would embrace him.
Still, it was good. It did not matter.
“Rayan.”
“Mm.”
“Rayan…”
He did not disappear like a mirage. He tried to draw Erhart closer, resting his chin on his shoulder. Speechless Erhart couldn’t say anything but call Rayan’s name, so he just embraced him tighter, as if he was about to shatter. Tears fell and rolled down his shoulders.
“I came back to you. I am back in your world…”
Rayan stroked his back, which swayed slightly in the smothering heat of the embrace.
It was an embrace from the sun.
No, it was his beloved lover who resembled the sun.
fin.
T/N: This is the end of the main story! Thanks for reading, and there are side stories (including some smut) so stay tuned!
Thank you! 💜
As long as we get a proper explanation in the extras about what exactly happened lol
Thx for the ch ٩( >ヮ<)۶
How did Rayan come back to life? Man, this didn’t end the way I expected, don’t you think it happened quickly?
Thanks for the update 🌹