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“Was it a good idea to leave them alone?”
Qin Siyi’s question made Gui Linghuo chuckle.
“Shan Yu is grown. And A-Kui isn’t the type to buy into her antics anyway. They’ll be fine,” Gui Linghuo said.
Qin Siyi glanced at Gui Linghuo. She fiddled with the logs before she fed one into the fire. “Who is he?”
“A-Kui is my lover.”
Qin Siyi froze.
“You guessed already, didn’t you? That’s why you kept glaring at him,” Gui Linghuo said.
Qin Siyi pursed her lips. “I didn’t mean anything by it.”
“I know,” Gui Linghuo said.
Qin Siyi glanced at Gui Linghuo who was patiently cooking the noodles. She took her hands away from the firewood and thought about what she should talk about next. She hadn’t found any news on their shizun, so a topic in that direction would just lead to more silence. She could continue to talk about Yankui, but if she thought about it more, the burning question would come out and she might get into a fight with Gui Linghuo again.
She had promised Shan Yu to try and make up with him during the New Year’s. And the first step to making up would be to…
“Is there still no news of Shizun?”
Qin Siyi bit down on her lower lip and turned back to the oven fire. “No, there isn’t. We haven’t found anything.”
“I see,” Gui Linghuo frowned.
“That’s actually part of the reason why we came back,” Qin Siyi said. “I wanted to borrow Shizun’s fan. I was thinking that maybe it would help us find him easier.”
Gui Linghuo’s grip on the pot tightened. “You want the fan?”
“Mn,” Qin Siyi said. She glanced at Gui Linghuo. “You’ve been so busy with sect matters, it’s difficult to search for Shizun anyway, right? Not to mention you’re still…sick. I’ll take care of Fenghua. I won’t lose it.”
“I trust that you won’t,” Gui Linghuo said. He moved the noodles over to the broth. “I’ll give it to you tomorrow.”
“Thanks.”
“No need to thank me,” Gui Linghuo said. “You’ve worked hard.”
Qin Siyi hummed awkwardly.
She stared at the flickering flames as she listened to Gui Linghuo’s cooking. It had only been a year, but how come she could no longer find the words to talk to Gui Linghuo. She hesitated for a long time before speaking.
“Da-shixiong, actually, I also came with another objective,” Qin Siyi quietly started. “About…about last year, I—”
“Da-shixiong! Shijie!” the drunk words floated into the kitchen, startling both Qin Siyi and Gui Linghuo.
They glanced at each other, put their things down, and quickly exited the kitchen.
Shan Yu held Yankui close to her side as she laughed and pointed at him. “Look at him! He can’t hold his alcohol.”
Yankui’s brows furrowed. He nudged her away and stumbled back a few steps. “Don’t touch me.”
“Hm? But Xiao Kui, we were getting along so well earlier,” Shan Yu whined.
Qin Siyi felt her head hurt. She marched up to Shan Yu and held her away from the defensive Yankui. “What on earth are you doing with someone else’s man?”
“I’m drinking with him!” Shan Yu happily wrapped her arms around Qin Siyi’s neck. She slumped against her and nuzzled closer. Her eyes seemed to be unfocused for a moment as she pulled back and stared at the older woman. A goofy smile spread across her face. “Shijie, I love you!”
Gui Linghuo watched their farce as he grabbed a swaying Yankui. His face was immediately backhanded, but he didn’t seem to have noticed.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“I’ll bring food to your rooms later,” Gui Linghuo said.
Qin Siyi sighed. “Thank you, Da-shixiong.”
“Da-shixiong! I love you too!” Shan Yu squeaked happily.
“Aera tbk wemt vlv sbe vglcx?” Hlc Vlsl rmbivfv.
“Ktgff ybaaifr bo Dfjeas’r Qlcf.”
Xel Olcuteb jcv Hlc Vlsl ybat rlweiajcfberis rlutfv. Dfjeas’r Qlcf kjr vfmfqalnf lc lar wfiibk ajraf, yea ragbcu jimbtbilm mbcafca. Vtjc Te rtbeiv tjnf xcbkc atlr yea rlwqis vlvc’a mjgf.
“Vbggs jybea tfg,” Hlc Vlsl rlutfv.
Gui Linghuo raised a brow in amusement. He couldn’t help but tease Qin Siyi. “What’s this? Why are you apologizing for Shan Yu now?”
Qin Siyi looked up at Gui Linghuo. The realization of what she had just done came late. Her face flushed as Shan Yu happily grabbed her cheeks.
Gui Linghuo lightly coughed. He lifted Yankui up horizontally. “Habits sure are scary.”
“Da-shixiong, it isn’t—”
“What you were talking about earlier,” Gui Linghuo interrupted. He smiled. “We can talk tomorrow morning.”
Qin Siyi reluctantly nodded. Her embarrassment of what had just happened took over the urge to apologize.
Gui Linghuo walked past Qin Siyi and Shan Yu with Yankui, who was quietly in his arms.
Yankui watched Gui Linghuo sleepily. He pulled himself up and wrapped his arms around Gui Linghuo’s neck. He pushed closer and nuzzled his head into his neck. Gui Linghuo shifted to accommodate Yankui’s new position, but a part of his heart swelled. He glanced over at Yankui and felt the corner of his lips rising. He should really find a way to thank Shan Yu later.
“Linghuo.” The soft, sticky voice called out his name as a pair of lips brushed against his earlobe. “Are you unhappy again?”
Gui Linghuo hummed in question. “Unhappy? No, I’m fine.”
Yankui pouted and rested his cheek against Gui Linghuo’s shoulder. “You didn’t look happy earlier.”
“Well, I’m fine now,” Gui Linghuo said.
Yankui hummed skeptically. “Is it because of Qin Siyi?”
Gui Linghuo glanced at him.
“Shan Yu told me you two aren’t getting along right now,” Yankui mumbled. “Said that she liked…your person. Did she say something mean?”
Yankui’s brows furrowed at the thought.
Back in Yinfeng Valley, if two people liked the same person, even if they were siblings, there was a high likelihood that they would fight to the death or use underhanded methods to get rid of their opponents. The Upper Realm shouldn’t be as crass, but when Yankui thought of the two-faced bickering he had heard at the banquet, he just felt that it was probably a different kind of insufferable.
“She didn’t say anything about that,” Gui Linghuo soothed Yankui softly. He nudged the door to his room open. “I think she even wanted to apologize.”
“Apologize,” Yankui echoed. He pursed his lips. “Are apologies everything? They aren’t worth anything. You kill a man and then apologize to him, it won’t bring the man back to life.”
Gui Linghuo laughed. He set Yankui down on his bed and tugged the thick jacket off of him.
“She said mean things to you, didn’t she?” Yankui said.
“She didn’t—”
“I mean before,” Yankui said. The edges of his eyes had reddened. “Before when…when it happened. That’s why you think it’s your fault.”
Gui Linghuo chuckled. He knelt down in front of Yankui and held his hands. “It is my fault. I promised to protect A-Yan, but I couldn’t. My shimei was right to take her anger out on me. But she realized she was wrong to now, so—”
“It wasn’t your fault,” Yankui said. “It was my fault.”
Gui Linghuo’s eyes widened a fraction.
“If I hadn’t been there, you wouldn’t have wasted so much time,” Yankui said as the first of his tears rolled down his cheek. “You could have escaped. If I hadn’t gone against that man and had just listened to him, you wouldn’t have found me there. If I hadn’t been so injured, I would have been able to save her.”
Gui Linghuo gently cupped Yankui’s face. “What are you saying? How is any of that your fault?”
Yankui shook his head. “If I had just died when I was supposed to, she would still be—”
“Yankui!”
The shout jerked Yankui from his thoughts. He looked at Gui Linghuo’s reddening eyes and was suddenly pulled into a tight hug.
“You have nothing to do with her death,” Gui Linghuo said. “It was my decision to save you. If there is someone to blame, then it would be me.”
“No, but I could have stopped—”
“You tried,” Gui Linghuo said hoarsely. He closed his eyes and squeezed Yankui tightly against him. “You tried, that’s all that matters. Don’t blame yourself. Don’t talk like that.”
Yankui stared blankly ahead. A while later he nudged Gui Linghuo away. “No. You can’t be so nice to me.”
“Why not?” Gui Linghuo asked. “I want to.”
“I have to go back eventually. It’ll be difficult to get used to it again if I become used to this,” Yankui softly said.
“You’re not going anywhere,” Gui Linghuo said, his grip on Yankui tightening. “You’re staying by my side forever.”
Yankui stared at Gui Linghuo as if he were looking at him through a misted veil.
“I’ll make sure of it,” Gui Linghuo said, his eyes reddening as the pain in his chest grew. “You won’t go back to that place. You’ll live here with all of us.”
Yankui slowly lifted a hand and brushed a thumb under Gui Linghuo’s eye. He leaned forward and hugged Gui Linghuo’s head to his chest. He pressed his cheek to the top of his head and gently patted the back of his head like Gui Linghuo often did with him.
“Don’t be angry,” Yankui coaxed. “You have to calm down.”
Gui Linghuo’s lashes fluttered. His fingers squeezed into his palm and he took a deep breath. “It wasn’t your fault.”
“If it wasn’t my fault, then how could it have been yours?”
The question was like a knife to Gui Linghuo’s heart. He wasn’t sure how to respond for a long time. He sat in silence and concentrated on the feeling of Yankui’s hands, toying with his hair. When the pain in his chest had lessened and when his heart no longer hurt as much, he finally took a deep breath and pulled away.
“Then, if I say it wasn’t my fault,” Gui Linghuo whispered, “will you stop blaming yourself too?”
Yankui stared at him blankly. He seemed to be weighing the pros and cons in his mind. A moment later, he nodded with a childish hum. A soft smile graced his face, so different from the look he normally had when he was sober. It carried a naïve innocence that painted the image of the sunny youth that could have been.
“Alright,” Gui Linghuo smiled. He gently kissed Yankui’s lips. “I won’t blame myself anymore.”
Yankui giggled. He leaned forward and kissed Gui Linghuo. There was a little more force behind his kiss as his arms wrapped around Gui Linghuo’s neck again. Gui Linghuo allowed himself to be tugged back onto the bed. He looked down at Yankui’s flushed face and was drawn out of the soft atmosphere from before. His own cheeks began to heat up. He pressed Yankui down and reached to unlatch the hands being his neck.
Yankui’s expression saddened. “You don’t want me?”
“Not like this,” Gui Linghuo said. He gently tugged his hands away and grasped them tightly. “Next time. Tomorrow, even. Just not like this.”
Tears rolled down Yankui’s cheeks again. Gui Linghuo sighed and pulled him up onto his lap. He held Yankui and coaxed him until the young man fell asleep. When he was sure Yankui would not wake up, he got up and carefully tucked him into bed.
Gui Linghuo activated the pearls and headed for the door.
The moment the door closed, he turned and was met with Qin Siyi.
“The noodles are burnt,” Qin Siyi said.
Gui Linghuo was stunned for a moment before a short, incredulous laugh escaped him. He sheepishly scratched his cheek. “Are you still hungry?”
“A little.”
“I’ll fry some rice for you then,” Gui Linghuo said.
Qin Siyi glanced at the door. “That’s your room.”
“It is.”
“Hm.”
Gui Linghuo suddenly felt uncomfortable. He coughed loudly and tried a serious expression. “We…we weren’t doing anything.”
“If you say so,” Qin Siyi said with a sing-song voice reminiscent of Shan Yu.
The two martial siblings shared a look and burst out laughing.
Qin Siyi followed Gui Linghuo into the kitchen and shifted from foot to foot. “Da-shixiong.”
“I know. If it’s hard to say, then you don’t have to say it,” Gui Linghuo chuckled.
Qin Siyi pursed her lips.
Their fights always ended up like this.
Although they were both similarly stubborn, they had never remained angry at each other for too long. When Gui Yin was around to mediate they would make up even faster, but without their shizun, this pointless fight had lasted for an entire year. And, in the end, it was still Gui Linghuo who gave up first.
Qin Siyi clenched her fists. “No. Not this time. I have to actually say it.”
Gui Linghuo glanced over his shoulder. The sizzle of the wok filled the silence as Qin Siyi took a deep breath.
“It wasn’t your fault. I…I have no excuse,” Qin Siyi muttered. “I was upset with everything that happened, but I shouldn’t have said those things to you. You were in such a state, it would have been impossible for you to do anything without dying. I’m sorry I said those hurtful things. I’m sorry I avoided you for an entire year because I was too cowardly. I…Da-shixiong, I’m glad that you’re alive.”
Qin Siyi’s head had lowered to the point that Gui Linghuo could no longer see her face. He sighed softly and walked over. He reached out and pulled her into a hug.
“Thank you,” Gui Linghuo mumbled.
Qin Siyi sniffled loudly and hugged Gui Linghuo back tightly. “I-I’m really—I really am glad you didn’t die.”
Gui Linghuo laughed. “Why are you crying?”
“Because I can’t believe I said that!” Qin Siyi bawled.
“Alright, alright,” Gui Linghuo coaxed. He smiled and rocked them back and forth as Qin Siyi cried.
The knot that had been tied tightly in his heart was slowly tugged at until it loosened. The noose still hung heavily in his heart, but the string had frayed beyond use now. He could feel a new sense of clarity wash over him in a tidal wave. He swallowed the lump in his throat and playfully smacked Qin Siyi’s shoulder.
“Hey, you’re going to make me cry too.”
“I-I’m sorry!” Qin Siyi sniffled.
“So, you really don’t hate me?” Gui Linghuo asked.
“I don’t! You’re my da-shixiong—my big brother!” Qin Siyi said, her voice cracking slightly. She rubbed at her eyes and hugged him tighter. “I could never hate you.”
“Whoa, never is quite a declaration,” Gui Linghuo teased. “What if I did something absolutely unforgivable?”
“You wouldn’t. You’re not that kind of person,” Qin Siyi said. “You’re very capable and kind. You would never do something that would make me hate you.”
Gui Linghuo chuckled. He pulled away and ruffled her hair. “Alright, you big baby, I get it. Stop crying now.”
Qin Siyi looked at Gui Linghuo cautiously. “Do you really?”
After Shan Yu had joined up with Qin Siyi again, she had slowly filled her in about Gui Linghuo’s situation. She had kept everything vague, but Qin Siyi could guess where a majority of Gui Linghuo’s heart demons came from. She knew that the human mind was complicated and delicate. She wasn’t cocky enough to think a few words from her would change a thought that had fully cemented in Gui Linghuo’s mind, but she hoped that he would at least know that she didn’t blame him.
Gui Linghuo laughed. “Yes, yes. Now, stop crying and go wash your hands. The food is going to get burnt again.”
Qin Siyi hummed. She sniffled and left the kitchen to wash her hands. Gui Linghuo turned back to the burning fried rice as the smile on his face fell slightly.
He let out a long, shaky sigh as he moved the fried rice to a bowl. He scraped the last of the rice into the bowl and waited silently for Qin Siyi to return.
It was more than he could have hoped for. He had thought Qin Siyi still resented him, so this was a lot more than he could have hoped for. He touched Fenghua, that still sat in his sleeve, and pursed his lips.
“Shizun, come back quickly,” Gui Linghuo mumbled. His eyes stung as he placed the chopsticks across the bowl. “I really…really don’t know how much longer I can hold on.”
Thank you for the chapters!
thanks for reading!!
ough my heart ʕっ•ᴥ•ʔっ my nose is burning with unshed tears, i’m so happy everyone got all them feelings on the table and reconciled and oh my gods my tears are escaping;;;;;
now we just need Gui Yin to come back ~~and beat up Yankui’s dad~~ and the family will be all together again :’>
time for some fist to nose action, Gui Yin– thanks for reading!
I am also missing Gui Yin and need him to get his butt home. Or show up in the storyline so I can yell at him to do so…. I know you can hear me, Gui Yin!
he can’t hear you, he’s beyond the fourth wall 🙁 thanks for readign!
Gimme his number. I can call him and reprimand him via call😭
💕💕
thanks for read!
My babiesssssss
Ow my heart, glad that they could have a talk
Please come back Gui Yin 🙏