When he entered the restaurant, I finally snapped out of it. Through the glass door, I could see him already back at his seat. Deputy Kwon, who was looking at him, started explaining something while pointing at the grill.
As soon as I opened the door, the noisy clamor of the restaurant filled my ears. Supervisor Kim filled my glass and asked, “Lee Seodan, do you smoke?” I was at a loss for words, unable to come up with any excuses.
By the time we left the restaurant to change venues, it was already past nine o’clock. Inside the cramped taxi with Supervisor Kim and Deputy Park, the smell of alcohol mingled with the scent of grilled meat. Loud pop music blared from the radio, and Supervisor Kim and Deputy Park continued their conversation uncomfortably, their heads tilted in awkwardness, just as it had started in the restaurant.
When I leaned my head to the side, I could see the tail end of the taxi in which Han Team Leader and the rest of the team members were riding through the front windshield. The red tail lights lit up every time the brakes were applied, and our taxi’s headlights reflected off the license plate. My heart raced as I watched the receding car whenever we missed a signal. I felt lightheaded, as if I weren’t in my right mind.
The destination was underground, illuminated by harsh purple lights. As we descended the stairs, the group of people who had been in the previous taxi were seated around a round table in the corner.
Glancing briefly to confirm that someone was sitting on each side of Han Team Leader, I squeezed into the seat opposite him. Supervisor Kim followed behind me and nudged me further inward. From this angle, his face wouldn’t be clearly visible. I hesitated, considering finding an excuse and turning back, but Han Team Leader, who had been looking at the menu, looked up.
“Lee Seodan.”
“Yes?”
His voice cut through the hazy and murky air with clarity. I froze, gripping the edge of the table.
Han Team Leader shifted his body to the side, creating a small space as if by magic on the long, curved chair. He tapped the leather surface with his palm and said to me with a perfectly composed face, “Lee Seodan, come and sit here.”
“…Yes.”
I offered a small apology to Deputy Kwon as I slid past him and settled into the space beside Han Team Leader. My thigh pressed against his. His faint scent mingled with my strained breath. My heart raced so fast that I couldn’t even look at him properly.
Han Team Leader slid the menu toward me after I sat down beside him.
“We’ve decided on this side. The remaining people, Deputy Park will handle your orders. Is there anything you’d like separately, Lee Seodan?”
“Yes, I’m not really…,”
“So, Team Leader, the Korean branch was established last year…,”
Deputy Kwon leaned forward from the adjacent seat and addressed him. The interrupted conversation enveloped me from both sides. Despite the uncomfortable seating, I didn’t move. I leaned closer to the adjacent thigh and quietly took a sip of water.
The drinking session seemed endless. Despite numerous attempts to refuse, Han Team Leader graciously accepted every offered drink. It seemed like no one but me was concerned about his condition. The team members enthusiastically filled his glass as if trying to settle some debt, and he drank with a faintly annoyed expression, as if urging them to continue until he was done.
He even intercepted the glass that was brought to me several times. He filled the small dish with snacks and pushed it toward me, insisting I eat while drinking. Deputy Park, whose face had already turned red with intoxication some time ago, noticed it and jeered.
“Team Leader, you’re quite obsessed with Lee Seodan, aren’t you?”
My mouth felt dry, but Han Team Leader didn’t bat an eye as he poured liquor into Deputy Park’s glass. When it overflowed, he wiped his hand with a neat gesture and brushed it off as if to say, “There, done.”
As the night wore on, the pounding music grew louder, and the floor became crowded. By the time Supervisor Kim returned from getting a drink, Han Team Leader was already leaning his head on my shoulder, fast asleep. Supervisor Kim, who had been about to pull my wrist, stopped abruptly, frozen in place.
“I’ll stay here.”
I said softly, my body stiffened. Supervisor Kim glanced awkwardly at Han Team Leader’s bowed head before nodding vaguely.
“This is the first time I’ve seen you like this. Are you okay being alone? What about Deputy Park?”
“He went to the restroom… If he doesn’t wake up soon, I’ll call a taxi for Team Leader. Please let the others know.”
“Got it, take care.”
With another sip of water, Supervisor Kim cheerfully disappeared into the crowd. The weight that pressed heavily on my shoulders as the table emptied out lifted. His neatly combed hair, which had been perfectly styled at the presentation, was now disheveled enough to cover his forehead. Through the gap, his sharp eyes silently watched me.
“Are you okay?”
Without a response, Han Team Leader dropped his head on my shoulder again. I looked around but didn’t recognize anyone. They all seemed to be out on the floor.
“Team Leader.”
I struggled to support his head and spoke.
“Can you get up? We can go to my place.”
“Lee Seodan.”
“Yes?”
His voice was barely audible, so I leaned in closer. Suddenly, his head drooped, and his lips brushed against my ear. The damp, warm sensation made my heart race. I pushed him away and asked, trying not to be drowned out by the loud music.
“Where did you put your bag… or your coat?”
Warm and ticklish breath flowed into my ear. I tried to lift him while holding onto his shoulder, but failed. I grabbed his coat hanging on the chair and draped it over my shoulder. It felt heavy, like a soaked sponge.
Once we got up, surprisingly, Han Team Leader walked without leaning on me. He stumbled a few times but managed to walk mostly steadily. I supported him as we climbed the stairs, holding onto the railing with one hand and supporting him with the other.
As we opened the door to leave the bar, a taxi was waiting by the roadside, waiting for drunken passengers. I shivered in the chilly air and opened the rear door, seating him first. After closing the door, I got in on the opposite side.
“Team Leader, the address…”
“Address?”
I was about to try to explain with my memory, but he clearly recited the address. As the car started moving, I felt drained. My stomach churned, and my head throbbed. Even with my eyes closed, everything seemed dizzy.
I must have dozed off for a moment. I felt a vibration. Looking at the clock on the taxi meter, about fifteen minutes had passed. As I groggily looked out the window, yellow streetlights passed by one by one. The interrupted vibration resumed.
Reaching into my pocket, I found my phone wedged between the seats. I clumsily retrieved it with my fingertips.
As I raised it to look at the screen, I suddenly snapped back to reality. Floating on the bright background in blue letters was my sister’s name.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“Kfjw Ofjvfg…”
Lf vlvc’a gfrqbcv, jr lo tf tjv ojiifc jriffq. P qgfrrfv ws ybvs jujlcra bcf fcv bo atf rfja jcv ygbeuta atf qtbcf ab ws fjg. P ibkfgfv ws nblmf jcv jrxfv,
“Qtja’r ublcu bc?”
Pa kjr vjkc. Pa kjr pera qjra wlvcluta. Ktf ajzl rtbbx, ecrfaailcuis. Ktgbeut atf gfmflnfg, jc jczlber ygfjat mjwf bnfg. Pa kjr j nblmf P tjvc’a tfjgv lc j wbcat jcv j tjio.
– Oppa, where are you? Why aren’t you answering your phone?
“…Have you already returned to Korea?”
– Why aren’t you home? I’m waiting right now…
My head throbbed fiercely. I leaned my cheek against the cold window and tried to concentrate.
“You’re in front of the house? At this hour?”
– When are you coming in? Where are you right now?
“…If you were coming, you should have contacted me. Why suddenly… I can’t come in today. Go home for now, and we’ll meet again tomorrow.”
– No, you have to come today. Why can’t you come?
It was so chaotic that it was unclear who was intoxicated. The car shook violently. The head of Han Team Leader, which had leaned forward, now sank back onto the seat. The taxi, which had stopped at a traffic light, was now speeding up again. Looking outside, it was a familiar intersection not far from his house. My sister repeated in a rising voice, like a parrot,
– You’re coming now? Why can’t you come? I came to your place.
I adjusted my posture, sitting up straight, feeling like sporadic, breathless sobs were mixed in.
“Speak clearly. What’s going on? Did something happen?”
– …I’ll tell you when you get here. How long will it take, Oppa? It’s almost dawn…
“Fine. Then…then, wait there as much as possible. …No, my apartment number-.”
At that moment, Han Team Leader’s hand gripped my thigh forcefully, as if it would burst. I clenched my teeth to avoid screaming and barely managed to press the end call button.
Cold eyes were staring at me. His usual composed demeanor was nowhere to be found as he calmly asked,
“Where are you going?”
“I think I should go home because of my sister. I’ll drop you off first, Team Leader-.”
“Are you planning to leave me here right now?”
His pronunciation was so clear that it was hard to believe he was intoxicated. He grabbed my wrist with a strong grip.
“If I tell you not to go. Will you still go?”
I opened my mouth, but couldn’t find the words to say.
Our eyes met. The moment I saw his pupils, all the strength seemed to drain from my body.
“If Team Leader doesn’t want me to go, I won’t go.”
“Don’t go then.”
“Yes.”
Finally, he let go of me. He crossed his long legs and leaned back against the seat.
I closed my mouth and remained silent. I chose to breathe while massaging my thigh, knowing it would surely bruise. As I took out my phone again, he leaned forward. He spoke to the driver, who had remained silently consistent despite all the chaos until then.
“Turn around.”
“We’re almost there, are you sure?”
“Lee Seodan. Please state the address.”
“Yes?”
“Oh…never mind.”
And he recited my address without a single mistake, his voice clear and firm. With his house parking lot right in front of us, the taxi made a U-turn and started going in the opposite direction. Han Team Leader crossed his arms, leaned back, and closed his eyes. He asked calmly, as if noticing my faint gaze,
“Why. Is there no space to accommodate one more passenger?”
“…I don’t have a separate blanket at home.”
“We never used separate beds before. What’s the problem? I’ll wake you up when we arrive.”
I resigned myself and put down my phone. I let my body sway with the movements of the taxi and closed my eyes.
The place where the taxi stopped was where he usually dropped me off. Before opening the door, I calculated the fare and gently shook his motionless shoulder.
“Team Leader, we’ve arrived.”
In the darkness, he slowly raised his hand, which appeared faintly visible, and then opened the car door. I turned around and stood up, wrapping my arms around his shoulders to support him.
The alley in the early morning was quiet and chilly. With him still attached to me, I entered the passcode to open the entrance glass door. It was fortunate that I lived in a building with an elevator. If it were my previous home before moving, I wouldn’t have been able to take him up. After pressing the button, I leaned him against the adjacent wall with great effort. His pale face under the dim light looked unfamiliar.
“Team Leader.”
Instead of a response, faint wrinkles formed on his straight forehead. Seeing that, amidst the confusion and drained energy, my heart raced.
The elevator arrived. As we went up, I pretended to support him by putting my arms around his back. Impulsively, I leaned my cheek against his chest. As I breathed in his familiar scent, my anxious mind slowly calmed down. With my cheek still against his neck, I looked up and spoke.
“I need to talk to my sister…”
“……”
“If you’re going to sleep, I’ll be back soon.”
The elevator stopped. Reluctantly, I moved away from him and prepared to support him down.
The door opened. The corridor lights were bright. When my sister, who was leaning against the entrance door, saw me, she quickly got up. The moment I saw her, I realized.
My sister wasn’t alone. The woman standing next to her in a white cardigan turned her body at the sound. I didn’t even notice his arms, which were on my shoulders, falling. If I hadn’t seen a photo recently, I wouldn’t have recognized her. The yellow corridor lights were glaring. The wrinkled and aged face was that of my mother, whom I hadn’t seen in ten years.
“…Oppa,” my sister said, standing up and approaching the elevator. I backed away without anywhere to go, stumbling backward into the elevator. My sister stopped the closing door. She grabbed my arm and tried to pull me out into the corridor.
“Oppa, just a moment. Mom came to see you. She won’t stay long, let’s talk a little.”
“I have nothing to talk about, so please leave.”
“Mom came all the way here to meet you-.”
“I have no intention of meeting her. Take mom and go home.”
“But she’s already here, even if just for a moment… Mom, come here and talk to Oppa.”
“Someone came because they wanted to see you!”
It was mother. Her voice was sharp and piercing, as if she were about to wake up the entire neighboring apartment. My sister let go of my arm and this time grabbed onto mother. Seeing me blocking the elevator, mother swiftly turned around. Grabbing onto the staircase railing, she descended step by step, her gaze fierce.
“It’s because you said you were coming! Why should I wait in the hallway for hours for a guy who sleeps outside and comes in from somewhere? What am I missing here?”
“Mom, please stop it! Oppa just arrived-.”
“I said I wanted to come, and you said you were coming, didn’t you? If you had come when I was at home, I would have rolled out the red carpet for you!”
“Oh, Mom! Oppa, don’t just stand there, don’t let Mom go…!”
It was like a comedy. Mother’s shoe came off as she descended the stairs. My sister, stubbornly, grabbed onto mother’s arm and pulled, bursting into tears. She looked at me and cried incessantly. My sister’s tear-streaked face, under the hallway lights, looked pale and unfamiliar.
As the elevator door began to close, it suddenly jerked open again. If it hadn’t been for the hand reaching out from behind, I would have stood there stupidly.
“Lee Seodan.”
It was Han Team Leader. He momentarily closed his eyes and then stood upright in front of me as if asking when he had gotten drunk. Mother looked up and stopped in surprise.
“What is this… You go somewhere and bring a man home! How shameless, in front of Seoyoung!”
With one shoe off, mother grabbed onto the staircase railing, her anger evident.
“How can you bring a man here when your family is waiting in front of the house? Aren’t you ashamed?”
“Mom, please, stop it!”
My sister held onto mother’s arm and cried. It was then that I finally came to my senses. My face felt hot enough that I wished I could just disappear into the ground.
I opened my mouth, but no words came out. When I looked up, Han Team Leader was silently staring at me. It was horrifying to know that he could see everything, above all the embarrassment. I felt ashamed. A lump formed in my throat, making it hard to breathe.
I pushed his arm away with trembling hands and spoke while avoiding eye contact.
“Just a moment, please come inside.”
“Just stay there.”
His hand briefly touched my shoulder and then fell away. He turned away from me, leaving me behind, and walked into the nightmarish scene on his own. Passing by my sobbing sister with disheveled hair, he reached out his hand to my mother at the stair landing. As if this were a commonplace event happening in broad daylight, he casually introduced himself.
“I am Han Juwon, your son’s supervisor. I’m in charge of the team in which your son participates.”
In his hand, which briefly rummaged in his pocket, was a business card. My mother, seemingly at a loss for words, accepted the handshake he offered, taking the neatly presented white card. With a natural gesture, Han Team Leader took my mother’s arm and supported her up the stairs. Bending down to pick up her shoe, he explained.
“I wanted to express my gratitude to Lee Seodan, who lives nearby and kindly agreed to host us. The project finished today, so the after-work gathering was extended. If I had been contacted earlier, I would have sent Lee Seodan home. I apologize for keeping you waiting.”
“…We’re always grateful.”
My mother said in a strained voice. I couldn’t help but chuckle. Han Team Leader took out a handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to my sister, waiting patiently while she wiped her face. Finally, he turned to me and spoke with his usual demeanor.
“Please take your mother and sister inside and talk. I’ll be nearby, so call me if you need anything.”
“No, it’s not like that-”
“No, there’s nothing to talk about. We’re going home, Seoyoung, you come here too.”
It was mother. My sister, who had been folding the handkerchief handed to her by Han Team Leader, raised her head at her words.
“Why? No, I have something to talk about with Oppa.”
“Then you talk and come back. Your mother is going home now.”
“Why am I the only one staying here? How is Mom going to get in alone again?”
“Mother is-.”
At that moment, Han Team Leader lightly tapped his finger against the surface of the wall. My mother and sister simultaneously stopped talking. It felt surreal, like a scene from a meeting room.
“I’ll take your Mother to the taxi, so Seoyoung, go inside with your brother and talk.”
“…Are you sure it’s okay?”
I spoke up. It was absurd. But Han Team Leader gently guided my compliant mother’s arm and turned his body, lightly pushing me aside as we stood in front of the elevator.
“I’ll be outside. I’ll contact you.”
“Team Leader.”
As he pressed the elevator button with neat fingers, he whispered in a low voice that only reached my ears.
“It’s okay, don’t worry.”
His words drained the strength from my body. My tongue felt powerless, unable to say anything.
Without even looking at me, my mother followed his lead and stepped into the elevator, her arm being led by him. The door closed. The elevator numbers started descending.
“…Oppa.”
When I didn’t respond, my sister sniffled and wiped her runny nose with the handkerchief.
“Oppa, Mom came because she wanted to see you….”
“…Just come inside for now.”
I breathed slowly, inhaling and exhaling. I closed my eyes, then opened them. Han Team Leader’s coat was still with me. It was colder outside than in the corridor. I punched in the code on the keypad and pressed the numbers to open the door. The house, left untouched since yesterday’s cleaning, seemed even colder and more desolate today.
My sister silently took off her shoes and followed me inside. I turned on all the lights in the house. I hung his coat neatly by the entrance.
“…Is that person Han Team Leader of the team you’re on, Oppa?”
My sister asked with puffy eyes, still clutching the damp handkerchief in her hand.
“That person is… not joking….”
“Sit down. We need to talk.”
“Oppa, are you dating that person?”
“Seoyoung!”
My sister jumped in surprise. Her gaze, which had been fixed on the closed front door, turned towards me.
“What’s wrong? I can ask if it’s true or not… It’s something I could ask.”
“That’s what you call it, now?”
The tone of my voice became sharply edged. It sounded metallic. My sister quickly replied, “Okay,” and sat down on the cushion on the floor, casting occasional glances at me.
My eyelids felt heavy. A profound exhaustion engulfed me to the point where I didn’t want to do anything else. I couldn’t even imagine how he must be feeling.
“…Oppa.”
My sister spoke softly.
“Can I have a glass of water?”
“We have a kitchen. You can get it yourself.”
Normally, she would have protested, but my sister silently went to the kitchen. The sound of footsteps faded. I closed my eyes and heard the sound of the cupboard opening, the rattling. After a moment of silence, the footsteps approached again.
“Oppa, I can’t find a cup….”
I stood up without a word. When I opened my eyes, my sister’s face looked pale. Her hair, tied in two bunches, was sticking out messily.
Leaving my sister, who looked as if she might cry, leaning against the wall with a distressed expression, I entered the cramped kitchen. I took out a mug and filled it halfway with water from the water dispenser. Through the small window in the kitchen, I could see the parking lot. A car with its headlights on was parked inside. I couldn’t tell if it was a taxi, and I couldn’t see him.
My hand, gripping the sink, was pale. I turned on the tap and splashed cold water on my face. My face was reflected faintly in the smooth handle of the faucet.
“Sit.”
I placed the mug on the small table and sat down. My sister silently settled on the cushion opposite me. Her eye makeup seemed to have smudged, making her eyes look messy.
Taking the cup and taking a few sips of water, my sister didn’t look at me and lowered her gaze. The second hand of the wall clock ticked away. I spoke first.
“When did you arrive at the airport?”
“This morning.”
My sister answered without looking up.
“I arrived in the morning, scattered from my friends at the airport… I went home and kept sleeping. I couldn’t adjust to the time difference…”
