Pr: Helen
Rayan let out a deep sigh. It seemed like sighing had become a habit over the past few days. Even though he tried not to show it, Erich was the first to notice Rayan’s depressed mood after Marielle visited.
‘I heard you didn’t even eat dinner. Why is the room so dark… I don’t suppose you’re sulking because I didn’t like the snowman?’
Only after the sun had set did Erich return, with the scent of the wind buried in him. Rayan, who had been motionless in the unlit room, turned around and hugged him as soon as he heard the voice. His hand, which was suddenly stretched out as if wanting to push him away, hesitated in the air for a moment and then immediately pulled Rayan towards him.
‘This body is not starving, but it is getting weaker. Every time I touch it, your bones protrude out and it makes me feel sick.’
Although he didn’t say it nicely, Rayan could tell the affection that seeped between the lines. Even though he said hateful things and sometimes hurt his feelings, in the end he was still so kind to him.
Rayan tried to slowly let his emotions subside and shake them off in his comfortable embrace, but it wasn’t easy.
Once the negative emotions revealed their presence, they grew in size and began to eat away at Rayan day by day. He was scared, more than that, anxious. He was afraid that his soul would become scattered when he was with Erich.
He didn’t want that.
In the end, if Erich did not remember him, Rayan hoped that he would remain as one of those passing by as he lived his life. So, he hoped that when he remembered him later, he may feel regretful at the end of their separation, but he would not be sad because they would never be able to meet again. He hoped he would never know how lonesome the endless wait was and how lonely it was.
“…”
He barely managed to quell his dizzy mind and gently traced the table with his fingertips. Only after confirming that there was nothing wrong did the anxiety lurking in a corner fade away a little.
A children’s book hangs at the tip of his finger. It was a children’s book given by Erich. No matter how he looked at it, he and Marielle seem to have similar mental ages, so they would be a good match.
Although human writing was still difficult for him, he was able to roughly read it based on what Erich had taught him in the past. He didn’t know if it was a coincidence, or a memory buried somewhere in his subconscious, but the Little Mermaid appeared in the children’s book he gave me.
“The king has no daughter.”
But the current king must have been a princess and a Simer at some point. Of course, he would never have fallen in love with a human. He continued to think about useless things and turned the pages of the children’s book, page after page.
It was a common love story. The Little Mermaid fell in love with a human, but the human loved another human other than a mermaid. The princess, who wanted to somehow gain human love, obtained human legs through taboo methods, but in the end, she achieved nothing, and it all ended in vain, and she suffered a tragic love.
Adult mermaids could go onto land without using the power of the taboo methods, so putting aside the question of why they made such a foolish choice, Rayan was somehow drawn to this fairy tale.
He read it several times and the fold marks remained clearly. Erich would probably ask what was so interesting about it that he read it so many times, but these days he was rarely seen.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
Ktfgf kfgf agjmfr bo rbwfbcf islcu vbkc cfza ab wf, yea tf mbeivc’a jmaejiis rff jcsbcf. Ciatbeut Ejsjc vlvc’a rqfmlolmjiis ibbx obg tlw bg wfcalbc tlw, Aegufc fzqijlcfv atja Sglmt tjv yffc yers klat qbilalmji joojlgr ijafis.
Cirb, rlcmf tf vlvc’a xcbk ktfc tf wluta rtbk rlucr bo vslcu, la kjr yfaafg cba ab rff tlw. Yg gjatfg, tf xcfk tf tjv ab ifjnf tlr rlvf jiabufatfg, yea ktfc tf mbeivc’a rff tlw obg j ofk vjsr, tf kjcafv ab rff tlw.
Rayan, who had been smoothing his storybook with his fingertips, raised his body. Before his resolve faded, he quietly opened the door, and instead of Jurgen, an unfamiliar man stood in front of Rayan.
“What’s going on?”
“Um, Jurgen?”
“The chamberlain has gone to assist His Majesty. If you need anything, please ask me.”
Despite his good-natured smile, Rayan hesitated to answer for a moment.
“I heard you like sweet things. Shall I instruct you to bring snacks?”
“No. Um, can I go see His Majesty?”
“… To the main palace?”
The man couldn’t hide his embarrassment at his unexpected request. The emperor instructed that the minstrel’s steps should not be restricted anywhere, but it was a bit ambiguous whether this was limited to the main palace as well.
“Is it not possible?”
However, seeing the delicate beauty with watery eyes quickly shook his heart. He had to tell him. Hurry. The voice whispering alone eventually encouraged his impulse. Wasn’t the same thing true about the main palace, that there were no restrictions in walking there?
The emperor would probably welcome it. No matter what anyone says, he was the paramour whom the emperor favored and sided with. Chamberlain Jurgen had repeatedly said that the guest should be treated with utmost respect and without any inconvenience. Even if there was no request, when he saw his face and heard his voice, he felt like he would give up his heart just to comfort him.
“No. I will guide you.”
In the end, he put aside his reason for a moment and followed his instincts. When Rayan, who he thought would naturally smile brightly, instead showed a sad expression, he turned around in confusion, but his emotions that had already spread had completely disappeared and he couldn’t find them.
“Do you want to go right now?”
“Yes.”
Rayan nodded his head quickly. His determination, which had been reduced to dust, kept scattering like grains of sand between his fingers, so he had to see Erich before it all disappeared.
At his urging, the man hesitated a little, but then he got on his way. Rayan followed right behind him. He took one look, and stopped as he walked through the garden, passing by a familiar path.
Just as he had heard, the day quickly warmed up and the snow melted. As if the world had been dyed white, the snow that had piled up wherever he looked melted little by little and dispersed every time he woke up. In that case, the Erich snowman he made should have disappeared long ago.
“…”
However, next to the garden tree that had been cleared of snow, the snowman still looked the same as when he first made it; completely intact without any part of it melting.
“It was a solemn command from Your Majesty.”
The attendant, who was looking behind him as he could not hear any footsteps following him, saw that Rayan’s eyes were on the snowman and explained briefly. Rayan looked at it quietly for a while and then urged him to lead the way quickly.
***
The sleeping palace and the main palace were further away than Rayan thought. Maybe his condition wasn’t very good, for he felt like he was struggling. It became difficult to breathe as anxiety overtook me. He felt regretful, thinking that he should have stayed in the bedroom, but his feet had already passed the threshold of the main palace.
Rayan finally pulled his mind together.
There were many people passing by. A gaze that somehow felt a little tired and persistent fell on Rayan. Shaking off his inexorable gaze, he continued to move forward, following the attendant.
“Rayan.”
Jurgen, as though he had heard that Rayan had come to the main palace, came out to meet him.
“His Majesty is currently in a meeting.”
“Oh, then…”
“No, no. I will take you to the drawing room, so please wait there and I will call for His Majesty.”
He couldn’t even finish asking if he should go. Jurgen motioned to the servant who brought Rayan that he could leave and grabbed Rayan. Rayan had to be led away by the man urgently without even a chance to catch his breath.
“Chief chamberlain.”
As he was being held captive, someone called Jurgen from behind. Only then was Rayan, who was already exhausted and had trouble breathing, able to catch his breath.
“Viscount.”
Rayan’s eyes widened as he turned his head to see who had called Jurgen. Karel smiled vaguely and bobbed his head.
“What’s going on?”
“Your Majesty is looking for you.”
“Ah.”
As soon as Jurgen heard that Erich was looking for him, he glanced at Rayan with troubled eyes. It was obvious that he was worried about what to prioritize.
“I will lead him to the drawing room.”
“The Viscount will? I’ll have another servant do it.”
“No. Isn’t he my ward? However, I wasn’t able to take care of him because I was away for a long time. I will be inquiring about his well-being and also offering guidance, so you don’t need to feel too pressured.”
“Well, if you insist.” Jurgen left a few words thanking him for the favor and quickly disappeared.
“How have you been doing?”
Rayan spoke to Karel. The latter looked at Rayan for a while, bit his lip, and turned around. His attitude was too stoic, in contrast to the fact that he had just smiled at Jurgen and said he would guide him.
Karel just walked forward with long strides. Rayan followed behind, not wanting to get lost.
It wasn’t long before they arrived at the drawing room. Perhaps because it was a place where Erich stayed for a long time, there was a scent that was reminiscent of him, among the smell of old books. It felt cool like winter, yet soft like spring.
“I heard…”
Rayan, who had been distracted by Erich’s scent for a moment, turned his head when he heard a voice that was focused on him. There was a faint smile on the other man’s face again, but there was clear hostility in his eyes.
“While I was away for a while, I heard you were His Majesty’s… Erich’s comfort.”
Or, it was also extreme malice.
“I’d like to express my gratitude to you.”
But Rayan was more concerned about something else than his feelings. For example, the name he called, ‘Erich’. Now, because it brought discomfort that someone else was calling the name of the lover you once called in the distant past.
“Why?”
Rayan asked why the other was thanking him and rubbed his sleeves with his cold fingertips as if he wanted to tear them open. Karel looked down and looked at it, then locked eyes with Rayan and answered.
“Well, isn’t it natural to worry about your lover?”
Here we go 😮💨😮💨
Thx for the chapter <3
As I said… the pest is back.. =____= Haaaah~
Thx for the ch ٩( >ヮ<)۶
Ay no, Karel, yo todavía te daba el beneficio de la duda. No pensé que fueras a ser así.
Que fdp 😑