Hyun Gyujin was great. Great enough that Yuwon wanted to date him after 18 years of being friends. Every time he saw his face, memories of the bold things they only did in dreams surfaced, and he wanted to experience them for real.
But realistically, those feelings didn’t make sense. There was no way Hyun Gyujin could reciprocate those feelings, and Yuwon didn’t want to risk their solid friendship for a tiny 0.1% chance. Yuwon wanted to go back to how things were before. To do that, he had to turn his feelings for Hyun Gyujin into his own little happening, from acknowledging them to liking Hyun Gyujin alone.
Yuwon agonized over it. He needed to change his mind to see Hyun Gyujin as just a friend again… But honestly, he had no idea how to do it. He’d never liked someone romantically before, so it was incredibly difficult. If he’d ever had a crush before, he might have known how to make those feelings fade… But he didn’t know anything. He could only stare blankly at his growing feelings day by day.
Seeing Hyun Gyujin was both painful and wonderful. His arms around his shoulders, his hands running through his hair and massaging his neck, his face smiling as they made eye contact at his height… It was all wonderful. It felt so good and exciting that his heart didn’t feel the slightest bit heavy when he was with Hyun Gyujin.
So Yuwon concluded that he had to avoid seeing Hyun Gyujin as much as possible. It was a somewhat extreme and almost impossible task… But even so, he had no choice but to try to suppress his fluttering heart by keeping Hyun Gyujin out of sight.
But that wasn’t easy, of course. Living in the same apartment complex, being in the same class, and always walking home together, not to mention sticking together at the snack bar during lunch, made it difficult not to see Hyun Gyujin. However, to be less tormented and to regain his friend, he had to try harder.
“I can’t come over to your place today.”
“Why?”
“Yoon Sung decided to go to the academy after doing homework at home… suddenly. He said the homework that needs to be done today is difficult, so I wanted to ask him about it.”
Yuwon quickly stepped back, noticing that Hyun Gyujin didn’t seem in a good mood, and grabbed his backpack.
“And since Yoon Sung’s house is on the way to our apartment, we can go together afterward, so you don’t have to come over after we finish.”
“…Okay.”
“…It’s hard, you know.”
Hyun Gyujin stood with his hands deep in his pockets, giving Yuwon an awkward glance from head to toe. When he heard a voice calling him from behind, Yuwon turned his head. It was Yoon Sung at the front door.
“Yuwon!”
“Uh, hey! You’re here? Let’s go…”
Yuwon raised his hand and waved it to the still silent Hyun Gyujin before quickly turning around and heading towards the front door. It was the first time, or rather, the first time he was leaving with someone else while leaving Hyun Gyujin behind, and his heart raced. He felt accomplished, but at the same time, he felt sorry for leaving Hyun Gyujin alone and couldn’t help feeling uneasy.
“Did you guys fight?”
“Huh?”
“Hyun Gyujin? Yeah, your friend. He’s quite famous. People say he’s scary.”
“Oh, no… Gyujin is nice. People think he’s scary because they misunderstand him. It’s just because he looks intimidating when he’s upset. He’s not the type to get angry at anyone for no reason. He’s actually really kind.”
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
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***
As Hyun Gyujin stood by the window, looking out at the playground, Kim Jun Jae and Choi Hae Young gathered around him. When they saw Yuwon’s back outside, they looked at Hyun Gyujin with surprised eyes.
“Isn’t that Yuwon over there?”
“Yeah.”
“Is this a secret rendezvous?”
“Don’t be ridiculous.”
“No, who’s that next to him?”
“Yoon Sung.”
“Who’s Yoon Sung? Hey, Choi Haeyoung, do you know Yoon Sung?”
Choi Hae Young, who had a wide knowledge and remembered almost everyone he saw, tilted his head in thought.
“Oh, he’s the transfer student in Class 1.”
“Why is the transfer student with Yuwon?”
The questions directed at Hyun Gyujin again. Hyun Gyujin turned his head uncomfortably while crossing the playground, feeling uneasy seeing Yuwon chatting and walking with someone else.
“They go to the same academy.”
“Oh, really? So Yuwon finally went to the person who taught him…”
Even though he knew it was just a joke, Kim Joonjae’s words still felt unbearable. Hyun Gyujin turned abruptly and walked back to his seat, slinging his bag over his shoulder irritably, and left the classroom. He felt miserable.
***
Having dinner at Yoon Sung’s house and doing homework together afterward, even though Yuwon received praise at the academy, he didn’t feel particularly happy. The reason was that he couldn’t shake off the image of Hyun Gyujin, who had been staring at him without saying a word.
Honestly, I knew I was strange for being so concerned about such trivial things. Even if you have a very close childhood friend, you don’t have to spend your whole life with them, and of course, you can spend time with other friends if you have other things to do. So why couldn’t I understand why I was constantly worrying about Hyun Gyujin?
“Hyun Gyujin always comes to pick you up when the academy ends, right?”
“Oh… It looks strange, doesn’t it? There’s a reason for that.”
“No, it’s not that it looks strange, it’s just fascinating. Usually, he doesn’t do that often.”
“Yeah… that’s right.”
Yuwon awkwardly smiled, picked up his bag, and went downstairs with Yoon Sung. As they left the academy building, with Hyun Gyujin’s face still lingering in his mind, Yoon Sung nudged his arm.
“There’s Hyun Gyujin.”
“… ”
Even though he said he didn’t need to come, there was Hyun Gyujin, as always, waiting and standing next to the door. He wasn’t wearing his school uniform, but a black hoodie and black sweatpants, with the hood flipped up.
“I’ll go. See you at school.”
“Okay… Take care.” Yuwon waved goodbye and approached Hyun Gyujin. Leaning slightly and still looking at his phone, Hyun Gyujin, with only his eyes widened, looked at Yuwon approaching.
“Are you mad?”
“…”
“Are you? Since I came even though you told me not to.”
“… Yeah…”
“Just give me your bag and be mad, then.”
Taking Yuwon’s heavier-than-usual bag, Hyun Gyujin slung it over his shoulder and started walking towards home. Yuwon, watching his retreating figure, quickly followed behind.
“Be mad, quickly.”
“…I’m not mad.”
“Why?”
“Because there’s no reason to be mad…”
A smile crept onto Hyun Gyujin’s lips as he glanced at Yuwon, who was speaking softly. But he didn’t want to let Yuwon know that his hurt feelings had all melted away, so he maintained his indifferent facade.
“What did you have for dinner?”
“Honey Combo.”
“It must’ve been bad since you didn’t eat with me.”
“Yeah, it was a bit less tasty.”
Yuwon, who honestly spoke, stopped in front of the crosswalk. Just seeing Hyun Gyujin standing next to him made his toes curl. It was a big deal.
“Are you going to keep doing this in the future?”
“Huh?”
“Are you going to his house on days when we have academy?”
“Why do you call him ‘his house’? Yoon Sung didn’t do anything wrong…”
“I don’t like it.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
Normally, Yuwon would have asked what’s wrong with that, but now, knowing that he didn’t have the right to say anything to Hyun Gyujin, who was sulking childishly, he held back. Who could call him childish when I use such foolish methods to avoid confronting my feelings because I’ve grown to like my friend? If there was a way to make Hyun Gyujin feel comfortable and in turn make himself feel comfortable, and if there was a way to erase the feeling of liking him, he would have paid for it, no matter the cost.
“Not every time, but… sometimes it might happen. It’s nice to study together and go to academy together.”
“I might go to academy next year too.”
Hyun Gyujin’s sneaker scuffed the ground above the sidewalk block. Yuwon bit his lower lip as he watched his feet standing side by side with Hyun Gyujin’s.
“…You said you hate going to the academy because it’s stuffy.”
“Well, I might have said that because I didn’t want to study then. But I’ll have to study starting next winter vacation anyway even if I don’t want to .”
“Why suddenly want to study?”
“I have to go to college. I’ve been thinking of really studying since the winter break. It’d be nice to do it together if we’re going to do it anyway. Then, you won’t have to go to that guy’s… No, you won’t have to go to Yoon Sung’s house.”
Even though he already had to see Hyun Gyujin’s face almost all day long and going to the academy together would melt his heart, he didn’t know what would happen if they went there together. But he couldn’t refuse Hyun Gyujin, who wanted to study together. And there was still some time left until next year, and by then, he would have had time to sort out his feelings and might see Hyun Gyujin as a friend again. If he could regain his friend’s heart, studying together would naturally become a good thing, so there was no need to reject it in advance.
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