In fact, Mai Dong couldn’t articulate what significance Yan Xuming had in his life.
For a long time, Mai Dong had been studying the matter of social interaction in his own diary. Especially in the period before the sports meeting in the second year of high school, Mai Dong’s diary, for the first time, resembled the typical concerns of an adolescent, filled with frustration and distress.
Turning to any random page, the contents were like this:
On a certain year, a certain month, and a certain day, the weather was…
The head teacher caught some students in their puppy love during mealtime on the field, and it seemed like there was quite a harvest today. During the evening self-study session, the head teacher talked a lot in the class about puppy love. There seem to be some in our class; I’m not entirely sure. I always don’t care, not even sure if I genuinely don’t care or… just pretend not to care.
Because I haven’t even figured out how to make friends, dating seems even more distant and elusive for me. I really don’t understand.
What kind of emotion makes a person think about another person every day? Even during the half-hour lunch break, it seems like they don’t eat, utilizing every moment to be together on the field for that half-hour. I absolutely cannot do that. It seems like I’m naturally emotionally indifferent. I’m unwilling to sacrifice my personality and time for someone else.
So, it seems like I’m not suited for making friends. Loneliness is a challenging emotion to overcome, but it’s just an emotion. I can’t fathom this species called humanity; I can’t even understand myself. Perhaps it’s better not to make any changes too easily.
On a certain year, a certain month, and a certain day, the weather was…
Today, I’m feeling a bit annoyed because the teacher was unhappy that I didn’t participate in the sports meeting in the first year and gave some cliché speeches about how the sports meeting is an essential occasion to showcase class cohesion. I was forced to sign up for a competitive event. As if being forced to participate wasn’t enough, I ended up being paired with my deskmate for the two-person three-legged race.
Ah, ah, ah! I really don’t want to do this. It’s one thing to play the two-person three-legged race in a kindergarten parent-child sports event, but why is there still such an event in high school? And to make matters worse, I have to do it with my deskmate. We haven’t spoken in weeks, and it’s going to be so awkward T T.
Not only was it awkward, but was also a bit frustrating.
I can’t quite describe this feeling, as if I’m being forced to act like a sociable human, something I’m not good at. My mom told me that as long as I can overcome loneliness, she supports me in doing anything I want and becoming anyone I want to be. But now, being forced to team up with someone I don’t like for a certain activity, I suddenly realize I can’t overcome loneliness.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
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But deep down, I feel quite unsettled. It’s the first time I’ve resisted something like this, and I can’t pinpoint the reason. I pondered it during dinner for a long time. Perhaps it’s because I really don’t want to be alone anymore. Loneliness has caused me a kind of mental harm, making me less rational and less calm.
But it’s okay; I’m actually quite used to being alone. After participating in this sports meet, I should be able to calm down. The recent academic workload is also heavy. If it weren’t for this unexpected sports meet, I probably wouldn’t have the mental space to think about these things.
Mai Dong, jiayou!
Mai Dong indeed rarely reflects on the past, he’s not good at doing that.
For Mai Dong, the clearest memory of the past is the sports meet in the second year of high school. From the moment he woke up in the morning until he went to sleep at night, to this day, every minute, every second, every frame, and every scene–Mai Dong can recall them all vividly.
It was already autumn then, towards the end of October.
Last night, Mai Dong didn’t sleep well. He dreamt of being entangled in various awkward situations with his deskmate during the two-person three-legged race. Both of them kept falling, and his deskmate blamed him for slowing them down. Standing on the field, his deskmate scolded him harshly. He woke up in the morning with a stomach full of frustration, Mai Dong had no appetite and wore a gloomy expression. The nanny auntie handed him half a soybean cake, which he reluctantly ate on his way to school.
Mai Dong was the only one feeling low-spirited; the other students were excited about the sports meet. The sports committee member continued with roll call, naming those running the 800 meters, doing the long jump, and participating in the relay. The clamor of excited voices filled Mai Dong’s ears, as he lay his head on the desk, waiting for the sports committee member to call out the names for the stupid two-person three-legged race.
“This time, our class has signed up for two fun events: the two-person three-legged race and the hula hoop. As you all know, these are just for fun. Although they are ranked, they won’t be counted in the total scores of the sports meet. It’s more about participation for you guys. Now, for the two-person three-legged race, we have Mai Dong and Yu Qiangqiang.”
Mai Dong finally heard his name. He didn’t respond verbally; instead, he sat at his desk and raised his hand. However, due to the noisy atmosphere in the class, amidst all the commotion, the sports committee member didn’t immediately notice Mai Dong raising his hand. He raised his voice again, “Alright, alright, Yu Qiangqiang, is your deskmate here? And where’s Mai Dong?”
Mai Dong had no choice but to stand up and shout, “Here.”
Mai Dong was genuinely annoyed. He rarely experienced such strong personal negative emotions, and it was the first time he had to deal with them, lacking the experience. Holding a vocabulary book, he arrived at the field. The unaccommodating Mai Dong sat in a corner above the class seats, feeling out of place among the cheering and jubilant classmates.
He made a considerable effort to block out the noise, focusing on memorizing vocabulary words as a way to force himself to stay calm.
He still remembered the few words he was memorizing quite clearly because he hadn’t been doing it for too long. As he casually glanced down, he saw Yan Xuming entering the field with a friend.
It was a truly mystical moment.
Despite it being early autumn, many boys were wearing short sleeves for the sports meet. Yan Xuming was dressed in all white that day—white sports pants and a white sleeveless tank top. It was as if, by a twist of fate, their eyes happened to meet with so much space on the playground and amidst the crowd.
It was like a silent snowfall settling in Mai Dong’s heart, and he suddenly calmed down. The surrounding voices grew distant, and that one glance, though from a distance, made Mai Dong wonder if it was just his imagination.
His eyes followed Yan Xuming’s entrance, all the way until Yan Xuming took a seat in their class.
Mai Dong’s heart raced, and he remained in a daze for a while before hurriedly lowering his head. “Tendency,[English tendency, trend; tendency… tendency, what does it mean again?” Unable to resist, he stole another glance at Yan Xuming, who was sitting and playing on his phone, his expression unclear. A girl offered him a piece of chocolate. Initially, Yan Xuming refused, but after some words from the girl, he accepted it.
He took several deep breaths, but he still couldn’t memorize the words.
As he listened to the announcements from the platform, it seemed that Yan Xuming had signed up for two events, a one-kilometer run and a relay race. He waited anxiously, finally spotting Yan Xuming running past their class. Like a gust of wind, he rushed by, and inexplicably, the girls in the class cheered for him, as if Yan Xuming belonged to their class.
Mai Dong found himself unconsciously clenching his fists, getting caught up in the tension. It felt like what he was witnessing wasn’t just an ordinary high school sports meet but something akin to the Olympic Games.
Unfortunately, Yan Xuming wasn’t the first to cross the finish line. Mai Dong overheard the girls in the front row expressing regret, mentioning that the first-place winner was an athlete and was bound to take the top spot.
As he listened, Mai Dong kept his eyes fixed on the finish line. The male student who secured the first place tossed a water bottle to Yan Xuming, and they exchanged fist bumps while walking forward, sipping water.
At that moment, Mai Dong didn’t fully grasp the situation. His mind sluggishly processed the information, and he found himself envying Yan Xuming.
Yan Xuming always had many friends around him. Not only that, his grades were better than his own, and he always participated in numerous competitions. Mai Dong hadn’t even realized that he had thought about Yan Xuming in such detail, gaining a surprising amount of insight into Yan Xuming’s personality.
Mai Dong felt a bit defeated, reflecting on whether he should engage in more physical activities to avoid being so unskilled in events like the sports meet. He could only participate in the fun event of the two-person three-legged race. It’s not that he thought the two-person three-legged race was embarrassing; deep down, he was dissatisfied with his current situation.
The announcer on the podium mentioned the three-legged race, prompting Mai Dong to close his notebook. He wanted to go with his deskmate Yu Qiangqiang to prepare, but after searching for a while, a classmate informed him that Yu Qiangqiang had already left to get ready at the venue. The vivid dream from last night was still fresh in Mai Dong’s mind, making him a bit nervous.
As he secured the straps, Yu Qiangqiang continued to complain, “So annoying! Why do I have to participate in this event? It’s so embarrassing.”
“Hey, Mai Dong, don’t drag me down later ah. Although I’m fat, I do play basketball occasionally. I’ve seen you hardly move; I doubt you have any athletic ability.”
“You’re still not hoping to compete for first place in this event, right? Let me tell you, as long as we don’t end up wrestling on the ground, that’s a win for us. Don’t even think about rankings. Even if we miraculously get first place, it won’t count towards the overall score. Don’t embarrass me.”
Mai Dong felt annoyed; Yu Qiangqiang kept complaining. Even though he didn’t say anything too harsh, the complaints weren’t directed at himself.
Mai Dong quietly retorted, “I know, I never wanted to compete for the rankings.”
Yu Qiangqiang’s attitude was still reasonable, “Oh, that’s good then. Let’s just finish the race steadily.”
When the starting gun went off, the participants at the starting line stumbled and staggered. In reality, this fun event wasn’t that challenging, considering it involved only two people. It was a matter of shouting slogans to coordinate left and right feet. Mai Dong did his best to cooperate, but after about seven or eight steps, his head was already covered in sweat.
Yu Qiangqiang’s rhythm was all over the place, complaining as they ran. In the end, he stumbled badly, producing a loud “clang” as both of them fell hard to the ground together.
Aiyooo poor maizi.. It’s just his luck to have yu qiangqiang as his deskmate. This is the same dude that expected him to bring free food and let him copy homework for free, right? Such a useless brat 😒
Author gave us some exposition to understand Mai Dong as a person, but I always thought that it that he thinks in front of Mr. Playboy vibe Yang in the middle of his speech)))))
Thank you for your translation 💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚
Poor MD! TT^TT
Thank You for the new chapter (๑˙❥˙๑)