Translator-Rhapsodite
Editor- yuki_shuichi, Proofreader- adjective
[Let me tell you a joke, Ren Qinming is a “good person.”]
[Thank you, King of Hell, I’m clear-headed now, prayer hands.jpg x3]
[That is to say, your dad is still your dad and Ren Qinming hasn’t changed, it’s just that we are different from teacher Ruan, cupping my fist.jpg]
[At best, we’re just wife fans, but he belongs to a wife-con, doge]
[No one has any objections to me calling him a double standard King of Hell right?]
[Ren Qinming? A sticky sweet pea? It doesn’t exist. Just that whoever successfully chases Teacher Ruan becomes sweet, I’m just a lemon.jpg]
On the other side, Ruan Song was standing on the terrace outside the living room of the wooden house, answering a phone call.
Although the show was a 19-day uninterrupted live program. It was not impossible to have a private space where they wouldn’t even be able to pick up phone calls.
This time, the call reached Ruan Song’s mobile phone from an unfamiliar number in City A.
It was quite normal for people in their line of work to receive calls from strangers.
From producers, directors, film companies, and so on, to fellow screenwriters, there were always all sorts of strange and peculiar people popping up from every nook and cranny.
It could also be an old friend from 10,000 years ago calling to borrow money.
So when Ruan Song answered the phone, based solely on the voice, he couldn’t recognize who was on the other side.
Surprisingly, the person on the other end didn’t introduce himself, and as soon as the call connected, he said, “You can make any requests.”
Ruan Song was completely puzzled. “What kind of request?”
“About you…” the man paused, his deep voice changing. “Don’t you know who I am?”
“???”
Ruan Song frowned on the spot. “Why should I know who you are?”
The other end of the phone fell into silence, as if he had never considered the possibility that Ruan Song wouldn’t recognize him. “…We met not long ago,” The man said.
Ruan Song’s blood pressure rose even higher.
Just as he was wondering where this clueless person came from, a familiar face flashed through his mind.
Through the superior radio equipment in the living room, the viewers in the broadcast room could hear Ruan Song angrily laughing with a ‘ha’ from outside on the balcony.
“After messing around for a while, it turns out it’s still you. Little brother, you don’t give up, huh? Do you have an ore mine at home? Isn’t there anything else for you to worry about besides this big project? All day long, you’re fighting to death with me.”
The bullet screen that “overheard” this sentence instantly exploded upon hearing this, with comments flying by rapidly.
[Wow, what exactly does Teacher Ruan do, feels like he’s amazing]
[Is the other party begging him?]
[When will the program team announce his career, wow, I’m anxious.]
[Before, everyone who participated in this show was a celebrity. It’s the first time an amateur that can’t be found on Baidu appeared.]
[What kind of big project is he talking about, he can’t be an overbearing president or something right, xs]
[If my brother is interested in someone, they must be extraordinary!]
[The other party fighting him to death shows that Teacher Ruan is irreplaceable in the project! He has strong core competitiveness!]
[Wow, how daring! With that kind of personality and professional ability, he must be really good, right?]
[That’s right! Also, he’s dressed so casually, he kind of has the cute contrast that a big boss has!]
When Ruan Song casually ordered t-shirts and jeans on a certain online platform, he never dreamed that they could be interpreted in such a profound way.
Even more unexpectedly, he encountered this rare, blank-headed youth in the industry.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“This is the first project that I’m personally handling, and I want it to be beautiful. So I insist on using your concept as the starting point for the story. How much remuneration do you want, and do you want the right to be credited? We are willing to make concessions on our side.”
Xe Tehtbe’r rfio-qgbmijlwfv kbgvr kfgf rlcmfgf jcv wbnlcu, ybat fwbalbcjiis jcv ibulmjiis.
Dea jii tf uba lc gfaegc kjr Eejc Vbcu’r fnfc wbgf rqffmtifrr rcffg, “Olaaif ygbatfg, mjc sbe pera yf tbcfra klat wf? Lbk biv jgf sbe atlr sfjg, 25? 23? Po sbe vbc’a ecvfgrajcv atf geifr, atja’r bcf atlcu, yea vbc’a sbe fnfc erf Qflyb bg mtfmx atf agfcvlcu abqlmr?”
These days, everyone was either chasing money or chasing happiness. Who cared about “insistence” or “hope?”
In the past, Ruan Song could bend and stretch because he was short on money.
Now he didn’t lack money after participating in a variety show, and his wild energy immediately returned. His temper was firmer than anyone else.
He thought that as long as the show aired, this person would immediately calm down when they saw him.
After all, being “Ren Qinming’s partner” was like planting a money tree in his backyard. Just by lifting a finger, they should know that he didn’t lack money.
But the other person seemed confused. “I don’t use it. What’s the big deal with Weibo trending topics?”
Ruan Song was completely fed up with talking to him and thought of him as just a simple producer. He said, “I don’t understand how wealthy your family is or why they sent someone like you to negotiate for this project. But in any case, don’t bother me. I’m not happy right now, and I won’t be happy no matter what conditions you offer.”
[Good guy, “I’m not happy with any conditions”, which proletariat out there is crying out of jealousy, wuwuwu]
[Teacher Ruan scolds people just like he’s scolding his grandson, he’s too A.]
(t/n-a, is an Internet buzzword. When describing a person who is very a, it means that this person is very manly and aggressive.)
[I’ve completely climbed the wall, I have goosebumps all over my body hearing teacher Ruan call someone didi, and my knees directly fell to the ground to kneel.]
[Also, I unexpectedly ship it again! In comparison, Teacher Ruan spoils my brother too much 15551]
Ren Qinming returned from the neighboring studio after selecting his makeup photos and coincidentally ran into Ruan Song, who had just finished a phone call on the balcony.
He tried not to sound too curious and asked, “Who called?”
Unaware of the poor soundproofing in this place, Ruan Song casually replied with four words, “Just a scam call.”
The barrage of comments started again, “Ah ah ah ah ah.”
[How can someone seem innately wild like this!!!]
[Ah……I love arrogant brothers, arrogant brothers are first under heaven.]
[Teacher Ruan, is fully deserving of being the model A beauty of the fishing system department, applause.jpg x3]
[I’m begging you, please directly debut wuwuwu]
On the other hand, the filming progress of Qin Sijia and Zheng Qing went very smoothly.
When all three sets of makeup photos were finalized, the studio staff gradually left, and the director called everyone to the living room and placed an envelope on the coffee table.
The viewers, familiar with the show’s process, had already typed out what was inside the envelope on the public screen.
[Guess how much living expenses the group director plans to give the six guests this season.]
[The first season was 2000, the second, third, fourth was 1800, the fifth was 1500. Feels like this season only has 1200 left, doge]
[If it’s 1200 if you average it over 19 days, then it’s 63 per day, and if you average it again over 6 people, then every person can only eat 10 yuan, facepalm.jpg]
[Then this thoroughly means that they can’t be lazy and order out. They have to cook each meal themselves, bared teeth.jpg]
Regarding the living expenses, the worst-case scenario in the guests’ minds was only 1200.
Living in this secluded place halfway up the mountain, even if they wanted to order takeout, it was unlikely there would be any available.
But when the director opened the envelope, one by one, they pulled out red Grandpa Mao bills.
(T/N-Chairman Mao, Mao Zedong. His face is on every type of bill in China, and the red color = a 100 yuan bill.)
The viewers were stunned, and the guests were stunned as well.
The director was satisfied with everyone’s reaction and announced, “For our sixth season of ’19 Days of Cohabitation,’ the living expenses will be a whopping 500 yuan! I hope everyone enjoys their vacation!”
[?????]
[500 yuan for 6 people?? The program team finally went crazy!]
[Hahahahaha, f*ck, 19 days with 500 yuan, that means 6 people can only spend 26 yuan? Even if they bought their ingredients and cooked themselves, it’s not enough!]
[Large sum of money…]
[Don’t tell me in the next season, they won’t cover living expenses at all, doge]
Jiang Qiqi, as the pampered daughter of the family, had never experienced such a battle before. She widened her eyes and looked at the director. “Are you planning to make us go up the mountain and dig tree roots to survive? With just 500 yuan, we can barely order a few dishes!”
[Laughing, Qiqi is shocked.jpg]
[Although 500 yuan is not as bad as just being able to cover a few dishes, it isn’t enough to buy ingredients for six people, doge]
The director’s team didn’t directly answer the questions, they just said that 500 yuan was enough to live on.
They also mentioned that they didn’t have to go out and buy groceries like the previous guests. There would be a purchaser who would collect everyone’s required items and dishes.
All transactions would be based on market prices.
The next morning, the purchaser would deliver the listed items to the foot of the mountain, and they could send someone to pick them up.
At the same time as picking up, they also needed to discuss and prepare the essential items for the next day.
Because for the next 19 days, the purchasers wouldn’t go up the mountain again. The only time they would have contact with them was during the morning exchange of goods.
“Do we only know the prices of the items at that time?” Liang Yi raised the crucial question.
If they only knew the price when they exchanged items, then it would be tantamount to getting taken advantage of and would be adding insult to injury to their meager fund of 500.
Fortunately, the director’s team pulled out a partially covered QR code that was half-covered in a mosaic. “This can be used to inquire about prices online. When the time comes, you can decide who will be responsible for inquiring, just add this person on WeChat while avoiding the cameras.”
After explaining the basic rules, the director’s team quickly left.
Jiang Qiqi had always had things handed to her on a silver platter. When had she ever experienced such grievances? She had already leaned against Liang Yi’s back long ago, muttering, “I can’t survive on this 500 yuan alone…”
Liang Yi smiled and gently pushed up his sophisticated glasses, appearing extremely patient. He reached out and patted her head, taking the lead in organizing the discussion: “So, shall we roughly divide the tasks now?”
Qin Sijia, being the most outgoing, immediately responded, “Well, since I go for a morning run every day, I can be in charge of going down the mountain in the morning to find the purchasers and collect the goods!”
Zheng Qing, “You might not be able to handle it alone, I’ll accompany you, and I can also take care of the hygiene.”
Liang Yi’s logic was quite organized. “The production team has already assigned rooms for us, and we can all take responsibility for cleaning the common areas together. We’ll have a big cleaning session once every 7 days. Qiqi can handle price inquiries and contacts, and I can take care of dishwashing. But the most important question now is, do any of us know how to cook?”
The barrage of comments applauded, finally hitting the nail on the head.
They have been wondering since earlier which of these people knew how to cook!
[I bet 8 cents that no one can, doge]
[Zheng Qing also can’t? He looks like he’d be a househusband.]
[Zheng Qing isn’t a househusband, he’s just a homebody. On Weibo he also said he and Qin Sijia are fast food lovers.]
[Maybe Teacher Ruan can. Under this kind of situation, the program team usually gathers at least one person who can enter the kitchen, it’s impossible that all six of them can’t.]
The guests also thought the same way and started looking at each other. Jiang Qiqi, who was leaning on Liang Yi’s back, was the first to speak up, “I really can’t do anything, at most, I can make some cakes and pastries.”
Then Liang Yi said, “I only know how to cook plain noodles.”
And then Qin Sijia and Zheng Qing, who were sitting on his left, shook their heads and said, “Our kitchen at home has always been clean and tidy.”
According to the sequence of the seating arrangement, the next person to speak should be Ren Qinming.
But for unknown reasons, everyone’s line of sight seemed to tacitly skip over Ren Qinming, and directly focused on Ruan Song’s body.
Ever since the director distributed the money, Ruan Song seemed to have almost zero presence, as if he were just a spectator.
Now, amidst the lively atmosphere, suddenly being stared at by so many pairs of eyes, Ruan Song leaned back against the back of the sofa in disbelief and said, “Why are you all looking at me? Do I look like someone who can cook?”
Stop joking around, even in the rental apartment, he had to freeload off of Cheng Yan to eat.
Jiang Qiqi immediately deflated, her last trace of hope shattered as she pouted and leaned into Liang Yi’s arms, saying, “So, after all that, none of the six of us knows how to cook!”
Liang Yi also couldn’t believe that he would have a day in the kitchen, saying, “We can’t just eat my plain noodles every meal.”
Qin Sijia and Zheng Qing couldn’t help but laugh and cry, saying, “Normally, the production team would do research in advance, there should at least be one of us who knows how to cook.”
[They only have 500 for their living expenses, are they forcing everyone to enter the kitchen to practice this skill? hhh]
[Maybe they intentionally did it because no one knows how to cook, for maximum variety show effect, doge.]
[When Liang Yi said he would cook noodles, Jiang Qiqi’s face turned green. It seems like his noodles aren’t that tasty, hahaha. ahahaha]
[Seeing everyone tacitly skipping over Ren Qinming when they were discussing the problem of who can cook just before, I laughed to death!]
[The most important point is that just looking at Ren Qinming, you know he can’t.]
[Nowadays, only a few amateurs know how. Celebrities are so busy every day, that there’s even less chance for them to have time to spend learning to cook.]
[It turns out that the sixth season was originally supposed to be a survival program in the wilderness, doge]
Several guests in the log cabin already looked wilted, and each one began to shake their heads while sighing as if they believed that they would starve to death in this house halfway up the mountain after being famous for a lifetime.
Only Ruan Song leaned firmly against the sofa, with no trace of frustration on his face. He pushed the back of someone who remained silent.
This time, Ren Qinming was unusually different. He didn’t react at all to Ruan Song, not even turning his head, while his jawline remained perfectly straight.
Ruan Song pushed him again and said, “Don’t play dead, speak up.”
The five people in the hall turned their heads to look.
Ren Qinming insisted on pretending to be deaf and mute.
Ruan Song simply didn’t care for his tricks and said, “That’s enough. There are only six people in total, why pretend?”
What was Ren Qinming pretending to be?
Everyone was completely puzzled.
With a height of 187, the usually unemotional actor pursed his lips, showing the unwillingness on his face.
“Why are you being so stubborn?”
Ruan Song directly used a big move, handling him like a mischievous child, unceremoniously pinching Ren Qinming’s god-given handsome face.
The bullet screen was immediately filled with “fucks”, and they were all saying that pinching that face was no different than pinching a thousand pounds of gold, and it was not his face that he was pinching, it was gold pebbles!
[In this world, I guess Teacher Ruan is the only one who dares to pinch it. He can pinch it, right? Lemon.jpg]
But in reality, Ruan Song didn’t think that much. It was just a habitual action.
Ren Qinming had evolved late in high school, and in his first year, he was still a touch plump, soft, and squishy, and when he trailed after Ruan Song, he looked like he was very nice to pinch.
Whenever he misbehaved, Ruan Song would pinch him.
Then, after pinching and pinching him, that bit of meat was pinched into disappearing. Ren Qinming’s height also surpassed 185 in his second year of high school, unknowingly becoming someone that Ruan Song had to look up to.
But Ruan Song still kept pinching, because not pinching would be a letdown.
When the other dozed off in class, he would pinch, if the other didn’t do problems honestly, then he’d pinch, if the other repeatedly made the same mistake on a test and lost points, then he would also pinch.
Thanks to Ruan Song’s consistent training, Ren Qinming developed a conditioned reflex.
So even though there were so many people in the room now, plus the live broadcast with thousands of eyes watching, he couldn’t help but feel aggrieved in the end.
Once again, everyone witnessed the moment when the “Cold-Faced King of Hell” changed his expression.
Ren Qinming frowned, his puppy eyes filled with distress, and as his face was still squeezed between Ruan Song’s fingers, he hoarsely said, “I just don’t want to cook for other people to eat.”
Everyone else, “?”
The bullet screen exploded once again.
[What the??? Ren Qinming knows how to cook???]
Then a familiar ID popped up with a feeling of deja vu.
[Brother Song’s skin is white, is handsome, and his personality is beautiful: Not only can he cook, but can you guess who washed Ruan Song’s undershirts and underwear before when they lived in the dorms in high school, eating melons.jpg]
[?????]
Author’s note:
Ruan Song crossed his arms: Washing underwear has nothing to do with me, don’t slander me.
Ren Qingming is hilarious. He just wants to spend time with his ex-husband but those other people keep getting in his way. 😅
Thank you for the chapter!
RQM really doesn’t give a f*** about anyone else 🤣🤣🤣
ren qiming is really a double standard queen i can’t 😂 the gap between what he shows to other people and how he is in front of ruan song is so hilarious
Hahaha, the biggest plot twist! (Not for us, we all knew that he is totally malewife for our SongSong~)
Thank You for the new chapter (๑°꒵°๑)･*♡
I love this story so much! How can Ren Qingming and Ruan Song be so adorable even when they’re broken up!
I wish people like this exist irl… sigh…
Thanks for the chapter!! It was very good 👏
Poor malewife rqm is feeling wronged having to cook for 4 other people 😂
I want to know who that commenter is 🤣
Housewife?❎️ Househusband✅️
Ren ‘born to be a housewife forced to be a girlboss’ Qingming
Kkkkkk a fierce wolf turns into a grieving puppy!
He’s not a husband, he’s clearly a wife feeling aggrieved…