When The War Is Over, Will You Plant A Blossom Tree For Me?Ch42 - The Harder They Fall

Warnings

Descriptions of strangulation wounds, attempted suicide.

“G-general.” Xi Ming stuttered in shock as his eyes fell to the dark ring of bruises on Fei Li’s neck. After Fei Li had cancelled all of his meetings for the day and didn’t show up for work, Xi Ming couldn’t ease his anxiousness. It was too out of character. So he collected up a document that needed Fei Li’s approval and visited his general under the guise of bringing it to him. The longer Xi Ming stared at those bruises, the darker his expression became. “What happened?” zYXEcd

Fei Li was skimming the document in his hand as he turned to sit back down at the low table, Xi Ming following at his heels. “Lu Qinyi strangled me.” He replied nonchalantly, as casually as if he was mentioning the weather, his voice hoarse and strained. The swelling and soreness made it difficult for him to speak, and the bruises were a concerning look, so Fei Li had elected to simply stay home until it cleared up.

“He- He- He what?!” Xi Ming, who had only just sat down, abruptly stood again. His eyes were blazing with rage and Fei Li didn’t doubt that Xi Ming was about to go and confront Lu Qinyi directly.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

“I let him.”

Xi Ming stopped short, his mind seeming to struggle to comprehend. His gaze fell back to Fei Li, brows knitting in confusion. “You… let him?” LqYwkS

Fei Li waved a hand to insist Xi Ming to sit again, and he obediently obeyed, staring at his general as he silently asked for answers.

“…I let him.”  Fei Li hadn’t fought back… he’d let him. Why? Did he really think Lu Qinyi would let go? Lu Qinyi was more than capable of killing him. Lu Qinyi likely even wanted to kill him. Why would Fei Li be so sure he would let go? Or was Fei Li truly okay with dying at the other’s hands? Fei Li frowned faintly as the answers to these questions weren’t good ones.

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He didn’t elaborate any further so Xi Ming could only frown in deep concern for his general but he tactfully didn’t question him further, and he discarded his plans to beat Lu Qinyi within an inch of his life. Xi Ming ground his teeth in frustration. “That ungrateful- The reason he isn’t in prison is because of you! The reason he is even alive is because of you! How dare he!”

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Days went by, in which Lu Qinyi’s room had been mended and he had no further outbursts, returning to how he had been before. He would remain curled up all day, showing no interest in anything. That’s why it was immediately weird that he suddenly chose to leave his room. Fei Li hadn’t restricted Lu Qinyi’s movement so long as the other didn’t try to leave his estate. He could move about the rooms as he pleased under the supervision of the guard assigned to watch him. But he had never shown any desire to leave his bed, let alone his room. Stranger yet…

“He wanted to help cook?” Fei Li asked with some confusion, his arms crossed over his chest as his gaze roamed over the kitchen. Upon being informed of Lu Qinyi’s out of ordinary activity, Fei Li placed his work down and went to investigate as something wasn’t right. 3BStR

“Yes, General Fei. When I asked, he said he was bored idling around and wanted to help out.”

Fei Li’s brows furrowed at this. “He was a general. Before that, he was a noble family’s son. He wouldn’t have even stepped foot in a kitchen before…”

The maid laughed a little, feeling light-hearted about it all in her naivety. “Yes, he hadn’t. I had him chop some vegetables but he didn’t do a very good job… He apologised after that and said he wouldn’t get in the way anymore.”

Fei Li was silent for a long moment, his eyes falling on the small pile of rather terribly chopped vegetables. He scanned over the area before he slowly asked, “Where’s the knife?” cG7i5k

“The knife?” The maid was startled by the question, looking up in surprise before she looked over to where Lu Qinyi had been working.

“The knife he had been using. Where is it?” Fei Li questioned further.

Sure enough, there was no sign of it. The maid paled, her lips quivering slightly as it dawned on her the reality of the situation. Her voice shook a bit as she replied “I-I, this… My sincerest apologies, I’m not sure where…”

Fei Li’s expression darkened as he quickly turned and left, heading directly to Lu Qinyi’s room with hurried steps. He wasn’t sure what Lu Qinyi had in mind but the other wasn’t exactly stable. It couldn’t be determined what he would do with a weapon in hand, and he was more than capable of using it. An ex-general with a knife was a dangerous force. Perhaps he intended to threaten his way out? Fei Li hoped he hadn’t had the chance to use it yet but he couldn’t be sure. Iy3rh2

But when he reached Lu Qinyi’s room, the guard he had assigned stood there unharmed and actually seeming a bit bored. The guard quickly straightened, saluting to Fei Li but his general ignored him, stepping past to throw open the door behind him.

His pupils shrunk once he saw the scene beyond. The person in question indeed held the knife in his hand, he seemed to have been contemplating as he gazed at his reflection in its polished surface. At Fei Li’s sudden arrival, Lu Qinyi knew his time to consider was up and he made his decision, flicking the knife around and turning it onto himself. Fei Li’s eyes locked with Lu Qinyi’s cold, determined gaze and, for a moment, it was like time stopped. Fei Li moved as fast as he could but Lu Qinyi was a touch faster, the knife managing to pierce through flesh before Fei Li got a hold of him. The two wrestled fiercely for control of the knife. At some point, Lu Qinyi lost his balance but he still refused to let go of the blade, dragging both himself and Fei Li to the ground.

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Kneeling over Lu Qinyi, Fei Li finally managed to secure his hold on the knife. But Lu Qinyi changed his target, gripping Fei Li’s wrist with one hand instead and securing Fei Li’s hold on the knife with his other. He used his grip to force Fei Li’s hands lower, hovering the knife over his own throat.

Lu Qinyi’s gaze was dark but unsettlingly steady, his voice quiet but calm. “Finish it. Finish what you failed to do the first time. Kill me you fucking coward.” 37psFo

Fei Li didn’t respond. His head was spinning. He tried his best to pull the knife away but Lu Qinyi gripped him with enough force that it hurt. Lu Qinyi shouldn’t have been able to compare to Fei Li’s strength anymore after months without eating properly, but due to the adrenaline and determination, Fei Li found himself stalemated against him. They remained locked like this for an awfully long time, Lu Qinyi holding him there mercilessly while Fei Li fought to keep the knife steady, preventing it from moving any further downward.

Fei Li didn’t want Lu Qinyi to die. He had ruined countless lives and was responsible for innumerable deaths. And he knew it was already too late. He had ruined Lu Qinyi’s life already. But he still couldn’t stand the thought of him dying. Of being responsible for another death, another dying with their blood staining his hands. He had already watched the life drain out of so many.

Fei Li’s thoughts were an utter mess, his emotions even more so, to the point where it leaked into the edges of his expression and his distress showed in his eyes. But it was only when the hands Lu Qinyi held firmly started to tremble that Lu Qinyi’s brows knit together and his lips pulling into a frown.

Finally, the building irritation broke through and he threw Fei Li off of himself. One hand curled tightly into a fist at his side while he laid his other arm over his face. “Useless. I hadn’t thought you’d be so pathetic.” Lu Qinyi spat hatefully, completely ignoring the growing pool of blood from his self-inflicted stab. It was uncertain if he could even feel the pain of it, surely he had to, yet he didn’t react to it. mKj8AU

Fei Li remained in the half lying position he had been thrown into, staring at the bloodied knife he held tightly in his hand. It was only when Lu Qinyi started cursing him to get out he was pulled from his shaken state and he slowly got up from the floor. His expression wasn’t good as he ordered for a physician to be called to treat Lu Qinyi’s wound.

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Author’s Notes:

Congratulations everyone!

You made it through the lowest point. Next chapter is the turning point where the true uphill battle begins, slow but steady progress until eventually all the characters will find their peaceful and happy ending, with some bumps, drama and fun along the way. But it will begin improving now. NL38C0

Many thanks to beloved Rae for her good work and to my readers and commenters for the encouragement. Have a lovely week all~