“…Yes? Uh, ah…”
The rigid member slowly retreated from the entrance. It was a tingling sensation, sweet yet electrifying. As the thick shaft was completely pulled out, the convulsions subsided. Breathing heavily through parted lips, I finally understood his implication.
“No, it’s just… I wanted to… It’s not like that, so… continue…”
“We might need to change the safety word.”
He spoke in a low voice as he gazed down at me. With a forceful push, the member, which had been teasing the perineum, plunged back into the tight crevice.
He swallowed the cries that escaped my lips. Our touching mouths moved gently against each other. With a slippery tongue, he retreated at a slightly slower pace. After teasing the glans precariously, he thrust back in slowly and deliberately. Holding onto my waist to prevent any retreat, he pushed the long pillar all the way in, caressing my trembling abdomen with his large palm.
“Why are you trembling like that? How far did I go in?”
“Uh- uh, just a little, just a little-.”
“You’ll dislike it when I take it out. Shall we see?”
With a wet sound, the member retreated. The empty space clung to the man’s vulnerable flesh as if in pursuit. My eyelids turned crimson with embarrassment.
He brushed away the sweat-soaked hair and gently kissed my forehead. Increasing the pace gradually, he whispered into my ear with a broken voice.
“This inside here… It’s shaped after me. You know?”
“Uh, that, ah-.”
“After letting me put my cock in every day, you’ve gotten used to the length. Now, no matter who else tries to fuck you with that thing-.”
“Stop, don’t say-.”
He removed the hand trying to block the ear. Gripping me tightly, he delved into my narrowed eyes and thin eyelids with his hot tongue. Moving from the ends of the eyebrows to the temples and then to the jawline, he finally sucked on the reddened earlobe. He nibbled and chewed it as if trying to chew off my ear. Despite the fear, it felt like my mind was melting away.
“Feel it in your ears, feel it in your chest. Do you feel like you could die from being touched here?”
“Uh, yeah, hah…”
He slowly traced the indented part on my waist with his fingernails. My toes turned white silently. Lips brushed against the ankles, calves, and the delicate skin behind the knees. The tongue teased like tickling, and the hard teeth pressed. When the thigh shivered in the air, he chuckled softly.
“Getting lost in the lasciviousness.”
“Haah, huh… originally, it wasn’t like this…”
“Is it my responsibility then? How can I take responsibility? How about sucking here?”
“Haah, no, don’t- huh!”
He forcefully sucked the reddened nipple into his mouth. The pure white burst before my eyes. Suddenly, he lifted his body and withdrew his member all at once.
“Ah!”
“Turn around and lie down. I’ll thrust properly.”
I turned around, curling my trembling legs. The firm hand behind me grabbed the round flesh of my buttocks, spreading them apart, and pressed the hot glans onto the swollen wrinkles. Using his waist to create a path, he moistened and opened the inner wall. My vision flashed. It wasn’t unbearable pain or sadness, yet tears fell onto the embraced pillow.
He pushed against me without saying anything more. He thrust the flesh pillar until the boiling inside became numb. He squeezed and touched every inch of my skin, sucking with hot lips. New bruises took their place on the fading marks on my neck and back.
It was an intense act of sex, stealing and plundering. In the end, as I fell asleep like fainting, I realized that he needed me more than sleep. At the end of a long day, after finishing work and coming up, what he sought was not someone else but me.
Just realizing that made waking up in the dawn inconspicuous. It wasn’t even melancholic. Rather, I secretly took back what he took, stacking a small and trivial sense of satisfaction from the corners of my heart.
***
As the presentation day approached, my tasks gradually dwindled. Organizing the vast amount of data accumulated over three months and preparing for the presentation were tasks assigned to Han Team Leader, Deputy Park, and Deputy Kwon. Even the tasks given by Supervisor Kim were minor chores.
With tasks being distributed evenly, everyone took care of miscellaneous assignments coming down from above. I had to wait all day beside Deputy Park’s desk, Deputy Yoon’s complexion became haggard from following Deputy Kwon’s temper, and Han Team Leader preferred doing things himself rather than assigning trivial tasks. Supervisor Kim, on the other hand, seemed to have little work and constantly disappeared from the meeting room, which became irritating.
Supervisor Kim, who came to work on Monday morning, was holding the basket I had seen before. This time, it seemed like she had swept in pastries from some imported bakery.
Han Team Leader was absent, not returning from wherever he went. Thinking that the meeting might be delayed, the remaining five of us spread out snacks and coffee on the meeting room table, sitting around peacefully.
“There are many new things. Where did you buy these?”
With a cookie in his mouth, Deputy Park asked, and Supervisor Kim began explaining roughly the location and nearby station. I brought the coffee cup to my lips and stopped, listening intently.
Among the snacks, there were stick-shaped snacks resembling Pepero. Voicing the same thought, Deputy Kwon spoke while unwrapping the red packaging.
“This is just Pepero.”
“I ate Pepero for the first time last year.”
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
Deputy Park said.
“Qtfc vlv sbe fja la? Pc Rbnfwyfg, ys jcs mtjcmf?”
“Qts jgf sbe ajixlcu ilxf atja? Zs klof wjvf atfw ys tjcv.”
P jirb gfwfwyfgfv Ufqfgb. Pc tlr xlamtfc mjylcfa, mjrejiis bqfcfv lc atf wbgclcu, Ufqfgb kjr qlifv eq ilxf j abkfg. Ljc Kfjw Ofjvfg, ktb kjlafv klat mifcmtfv olrar lc ogbca bo atf abjrafg, cbalmfv wf ibbxlcu lcab atf mjylcfa ijafg. Rbcmtjijcais qeaalcu bcf lc fjmt yju, tf rjlv, ‘obg iecmt,’ jr lo la kfgf cbatlcu. P mbeivc’a ecvfgrajcv kts tf tjv j yju klat jc bqfc hlqqfg jii atf alwf.
“Come to think of it, for Valentine’s or White Day this year… Lee Seodan.”
“Yes. Yes?”
“Why did your mind go blank? Are you tired?”
Supervisor Kim pushed the basket toward me. I snapped out of it and said I was fine. Supervisor Kim responded.
“I hope you’re fine. I feel like I’m going to die from exhaustion. Can’t I take just one week off?”
“Everything is almost finished, why take a break now?”
“It’s not that I’m taking a break now… I won’t be able to rest even after it’s done. There’ll be a backlog of work when I return to the department.”
“That’s true…”
“I just want to take a week off and relax after it’s all over, but it’s not possible, is it?”
I closed the zipper of my bag. As I watched a fragment of the white corridor visible through the gap in the meeting room door, suddenly, Supervisor Kim’s hand appeared over my shoulder. Startled, I looked up.
“Where are you, Lee Seodan?”
“Where? ”
“Haven’t you heard? I’m going to Hawaii.”
‘Hawaii?’ I asked, dumbfounded. Supervisor Kim cleared the basket and sat on the table.
“According to my friend who went last year, Hawaii is amazing. When the weather is good, you can lay a towel on the beach and sunbathe for about a week… Buy tropical fruits and eat them to your heart’s content. Have you tried guava, Lee Seodan? Guava must be delicious.”
“If it’s a week, your skin will completely tan and disappear.”
Deputy Kwon, who was listening, said apathetically.
“Also, isn’t it a waste to spend a whole day on a plane ride? If you adapt to the time difference, you could spend the entire week there.”
“Still, there’s nowhere worth going domestically.”
Deputy Park interjected.
“No, surprisingly, there is. Jeju Island is nice, and there are many good places to eat. My wife suggested going somewhere far to see cherry blossoms on the weekend. These days, local festivals are not bad either. Even if you just go around finding good restaurants for a week-”
“People sure find ways to enjoy themselves.”
A chilly voice interrupted. Supervisor Kim quickly slid off the table. Han Team Leader, who had been standing behind, suddenly threw the file he was holding onto the table. The atmosphere, which was not this low-pressure in the morning, became stern.
“You leave only four days and slack off like this?”
“…No.”
“Don’t you have a separate time to plan your vacation schedule? Pull yourselves together.”
“I’m sorry, Team Leader.” Deputy Park spoke as the representative. I, who had been listening silently beside, also bowed my head as if I were a sinner. The noisy meeting room quieted down as if cold water had been poured. Han Team Leader, without saying a word, turned his back and began writing the schedule on the whiteboard.
Thinking about overseas because of the airplane, I drew a star on the top of the open notebook. Weekend, Seoyoung, call, I wrote. Yesterday, on the site I checked to confirm the news, there was a countdown starting with ‘D-‘, and a crying emoticon. It seemed that the presentation would be over by the time my younger sister returned to Korea.
At lunchtime, I sent my team members to the restaurant first and went up to the rooftop alone. The noon sunlight was quite spring-like and a refreshing breeze was blowing. Leaning against the railing, I opened the packaging of the Pepero. I took out one stick of the snack and put it in my mouth.
On the main road, cherry blossoms were blooming in full pink, and rows of cars stood at the traffic lights, their roofs colorful. There seemed to have been many monochrome scenes until now, perhaps because it was winter. Beside the pink flowering tree, a red sports car and an orange taxi stood side by side. The sunlight was blazing hot on the back of my nose. Then, he spoke from behind.
“Did you learn to smoke during that time?”
I was so surprised that the hand resting on the railing tightened. Turning around quickly with the Pepero in my mouth, I saw Han Team Leader standing there.
“Even so, you shouldn’t really eat snacks as a lunchbox.”
“I just came up to get some fresh air before lunch… I’m going downstairs to eat now.”
“Just stay here for a moment.”
He said briefly. I, who was about to go pass him, leaned my back against the railing again.
Han Team Leader leaned against my side and asked for a cigarette. I looked down at the floor, remembering the last time we came up to this rooftop together. It seemed cold back then, but the weather had warmed up now. Today, he wasn’t even wearing a coat.
While Han Team Leader smoked a cigarette, I finished the entire box of Pepero. I tore the bottom of the empty box, folded it comfortably, and waited. Breaking the silence, Han Team Leader crumbled the cigarette and, in a dry voice, said.
“Go home first today.”
“…Where are you going?”
“It wasn’t on the schedule, but I ended up having to go to a pointless reception. At this time… do they all have some sort of agenda? Selling their brains off somewhere.”
A dull irritation seeped from the end of his words. Han Team Leader, who had stepped away from the railing, added.
“I’ll text you the front door passcode.”
“In that case, I’ll-.”
Realizing one thing belatedly, I called out to him, stopping him.
“I’ll also be leaving for home today. If Han Team Leader isn’t here, then there’s no need to-.”
“What home?”
He asked expressionlessly.
“…My home.”
Without a response, Han Team Leader took out his phone. After tapping the screen a few times, my phone, which was in my pocket, vibrated. The ten-digit passcode would have arrived in the messages. I knew without looking.
“If you don’t enter the parking lot, the entrance is on the opposite side. Don’t get confused, just check and go in.”
“Team Leader…?”
“Why you need to go home, try convincing me.”
“…It’s not urgent, but it’s been vacant for too long, I think I need to clean up… there are also things I need to take care of…”
He met my gaze indifferently. It was a face that couldn’t be convinced even without asking.
I lowered my eyes first. Han Team Leader spoke sharply like a dull blade.
“Whether I’m here or not, the place you need to live at for now is my house, Lee Seodan. Before you go anywhere or visit your home without asking me, fold up those thoughts in advance.”
“Team Leader.”
“Don’t go elsewhere, go straight home.”
As if the conversation had ended, he turned his body. I stood there, watching in dismay as he disappeared beyond the door, across the rooftop.
***
Deputy Park had left for home, and it was a little past twelve. Han Team Leader was already gone. Briefly considering stopping by home before going, I ultimately hailed a taxi outside the company like a tamed animal.
When I tried to enter through the front gate instead of the parking lot, as he had warned, I struggled for a while to find the entrance. I took the elevator and stood in front of the familiar door. As I touched the keypad, blue numbers appeared.
It was an unexpected event, but I wondered what he had in mind by telling me the password. Glancing at the messages on my way here, I found that I could press the ten digits without making a mistake. Even if he had told me to forget it, I wasn’t confident that I could.
With a click, the dry sound of the unlocking bolt echoed. I grabbed the handle, and the door, typical of these days, opened easily.
His house, absent of Han Team Leader, was larger than what I saw this morning and shrouded in a cool darkness. I neatly placed my shoes in the entryway, turned on the light switch after putting down my bag and removing my outerwear.
Feeling strangely uplifted, it didn’t settle down easily. My gaze, wandering without order, eventually landed on the shirt draped over the hanger next to the entryway.
“….”
Staring through it relentlessly, I eventually loosened my tie and unbuttoned it slowly. Undoing the belt buckle and hesitating, I left my underwear untouched. I quickly put on the white shirt over the revealed bare skin. The sensation of the dry fabric felt good. Only when the fabric of the shirt swayed loosely around my thighs did my mind finally ease.
Habits were terrifying. I sat on the armrest of the sofa, mumbling quietly. I hadn’t been able to take off my clothes right away at the entrance for a few days. If he had seen it, he would have laughed.
Wearing his shirt and walking around the house barefoot, I opened the refrigerator, but the ingredients that came out were things I wasn’t confident to handle. Tofu, bean sprouts, cucumber. The surface of the green pepper felt smooth, so I touched it and felt good. There were apples, but it seemed useless to cut fruit. I reluctantly put everything back where it belonged.
Seeing the dishes and cups I used in the morning on the dish rack, I took them out one by one and placed them in the cupboard. Checking the rice cooker’s buttons, it seemed like I could operate it roughly, but what good was plain rice. In the end, I gave up, kneeled on a stool, and sighed.
Since high school, I had been living alone, but it felt like time had been wasted in vain. I should have learned at least a simple hangover soup. I wondered how it would turn out with bean sprouts, but he wasn’t the kind of person who would silently eat even if it didn’t taste good. I didn’t want to hear harsh words coming across the table from him since the morning.
Sitting for a while, I stood up. I put on pants again under his shirt, grabbed my outerwear and wallet. I roughly pushed my bare feet into the shoes.
Outside, it was drizzling rain. After taking a taxi, I couldn’t find the 24-hour restaurant I vaguely saw. When I walked for a while, it was a large street lined with cherry blossoms, but the stores I peered into were dark and closed. Behind the glass of the phone store, a fluorescent wall clock was flickering. Raindrops hanging from the eaves fell lightly on my head.
Eventually, I entered a convenience store with the lights on. I chose instant buckwheat soup, two packs of cigarettes, and a hangover relief remedy, placing them on the counter.
“Rather, this is better.”
The part-time worker said when she saw my selection. While I was wandering in front of the shelves, she seemed to doze off, and her eyes were reddened.
“Then, please give me that… Oh, this too.”
On the shelf next to the counter, there was ice cream that he had bought for me last time. I picked a pink one and grabbed it, closing the shelf door. A plastic bag and a receipt were handed over the counter. Ding, and the convenience store door rang.
On the way back, I took a bite of the ice cream. The road was covered with petals scattered like a path by the thick raindrops. This time, I didn’t wander at the entrance of the apartment. I was briefly flustered because I didn’t bring my phone, but recalling, the ten-digit number I had pressed firmly seemed correct.
I stood the cigarette pack and hangover relief remedy side by side on the dining table like toy soldiers. I went upstairs to the bathroom, washed, dried my hair, and climbed onto the bed. The bed was wider than I remembered. After tossing and turning for a while, I finally pulled the familiar scent from his pillow into my arms.
I woke up. I thought it was a dream, but it wasn’t. Holding my breath and listening, I heard a faint rustling sound from below. Dim light seeped through the open door.
I stood up while groping the shirt that had risen to my waist. I put on the quilt over my shoulders and got up. I was about to step towards the open door when I almost tripped over the quilt.
Looking down carefully on the cold doorstep, he was there. He stood under the dimly lit table lamp, his tall figure frozen in place. His hand extending from the black coat flicked, knocking over a cigarette pack. The hangover remedy bottle rolled down. He caught it before it hit the ground, placed it on top of the cigarette pack. I held the door and remained silent.
He roughly stretched his arm, knocking over the light. He started climbing the stairs slowly. The scent of alcohol, the scent of fruit. The cold breeze that seemed to cling to his coat shook my shoulders. As he got closer, my heart pounded. I opened my mouth, but no words came out. The faint light seeping into the living room was flickering.
“….”
After climbing all the stairs, he finally noticed me. His expressionless face froze for a moment. His eyebrows slowly furrowed, and the tightly closed lips slightly parted. He fixed his gaze on me, and he quietly exhaled.
“What are you doing there?”
As the distance narrowed, the scent of alcohol became stronger. When the sweet aroma, like wine, wafted in, fear and a touch of anticipation made my fingertips numb. I pushed the door open and hesitantly stepped back.
“Did you wake up because of me?”
“No, it’s just-.”
Suddenly, a dark shadow leaned towards me as if to engulf me. There was no chance to scream. My body was pulled tightly towards him with the quilt.
“Team Leader-.”
“Isn’t it strange?”
As I awkwardly took a step back, his heavy body followed slowly. Leaning his chin heavily on top of my head, he mumbled.
“… Just a moment ago, I felt terrible.”
“Team Leader, please-.”
He lifted the quilt as if to shake it off from my toes. I, barely maintaining balance on tiptoes, eventually lost equilibrium and fell backward. Twisting my body in the air, my back hit the bed. Then, a large and heavy object fell onto my body.
“Team Leader.”
“…”
“Team Leader… Just a little, you’re too heavy.”
His heavy head rested on my shoulder. Warm breath reached the tense nape of my neck. A strong scent, a mix of wine, and a deep musk permeated the air.
After catching my breath a few times and regaining my scattered thoughts, I tried to extricate myself from the entangled blanket beneath him. His heavy body pressed down on me like a lump of iron. One leg was pinned by a firm thigh, making any movement impossible.
Silently struggling, I eventually gave up and lay still. The pre-dawn light flickered on the ceiling as I looked up beyond his shoulder.
“…Lee Seodan.”
At that moment, he, who seemed to have fallen asleep, spoke slowly near my ear.
“Team Leader, just the clothes-.”
“Why is Lee Seodan here?”
His fingers, slowly feeling down my shoulder, gripped my wrist as if intending to leave a bruise. The rough throb, transmitted through the touching chests, wasn’t mine. I closed my eyes and breathed silently when the pain in my wrist eased a bit. In a subdued voice, I replied.
“Team Leader, you asked me to stay.”
“…Right.”
In the darkness, his eyes were visible. His eyes, clouded by alcohol and sleep, lacked their usual composure. Staring down at me as if to dissect me into pieces, he spoke slowly.
“Yes, that’s what I did.”
His firm arm embraced my waist. As his body enveloped me, a bit of strength drained away. Warm breath moistened my neck, and I couldn’t resist at all.
I closed my eyes and waited. When he didn’t move, I hesitantly reached out and hugged his back. Once accustomed, the weight pressing down on my body didn’t feel uncomfortable. My eyelids naturally became heavy.
Come to think of it, since my feet landed in his house, there hadn’t been much time for a good night’s sleep. However, I had never felt regret for forgetting and not bringing sleep aids.
Thank you for the update!
thank you for this chapter update☺️☺️
whoaaa goshh the toxicity of their relationship is beyond my understanding, I really like the plot, I knew that uke will fall in love first but I’m not certain what will be the ending of their relationship so I’m so excited to read every chapter, thank you for translating this story🫶❤️
Thanks for the update!Man, I really need a support group for this story, so excuse my rambling as I vent my frustrations. Their relationship is so heavy, my heart hurts for Lee Seodan. I see Han Juwon starting to treat him with more care. But it’s two steps forward, one step back with him. It really hurt my heart in chapter 35 when he said “You should get used to it from now on” (the tears on Lee Seodan’s mouth).Eagerly awaiting the next update, so my heart can hopefully heal from this painful relationship 🙁