PsychicCh80 - To Change Oneself is To Change The World

Warning: mentions of suicide and depression

Edited by Qiuxue and Noks PAfW4m

How was it easy to find a little girl just on the basis of a painting?

Chrysanthemum Garden.

Those who had experienced the complexity of the Internet and understood the universality of social media platforms would be deeply impressed by such a feat. 

Furthermore, marked in the lower right corner of the painting was a name, which had been written by Yu Yuntian in small fancy characters — Gina. Ot8fVG

With this additional clue, it took the private detective little effort in finding the most accurate piece of information out of the tens of thousands of results produced by the search engines.

— Gina, a 13-year-old American girl with a severe depression, had attempted suicide five times, and had been rescued each of those times by her worried parents, who took good care of her.

The last time she had attempted suicide was just three months ago. She had wrapped a shower curtain around her neck in an attempt to hang herself…

Her parents looked as if they had collapsed under the pressure of facing such life and death situations again and again. They were at a complete loss on what they could do, and could see no other way except for praying to God for salvation.

They had hired a psychologist for their child, and had even sent her to a special institution for recuperation, but all of it proved to be useless. The child was simply not willing to communicate with anyone at all.

Only three years ago, she had been perfectly normal.

According to her parents, it was then that she had suddenly changed, and had become like this one evening. 

She had gotten off the school bus with a school bag slung on her shoulder and then had simply stood at the gate to the yard for a long time, looking as if she had lost her soul. a81qKS

She hadn’t eaten anything for dinner that day, and her parents had simply taken it that she was just too tired and just needed to sleep.

Such a young child shouldn’t have had to face any serious troubles at her age. They had thought that she would return to normal and heal from whatever was troubling her, or free herself from the sorrow she looked to be entangled in, in just a few hours at most.

But they had guessed wrong. They had been so very wrong.

Gina, after waking up the next day, still showed no signs of recovering from this trance-like state. Since then, she had slowly lost the ability to laugh, to jump, to learn, to talk, and then lastly, had even lost the desire to live.  yVdln

She had gradually changed from a living breathing person to a walking corpse, numb to any emotion and devoid of any expression.

Her parents had suffered from this change in her, but they just could not figure out what she had experienced on that particular day.

She had attended class normally and should not have suffered any harm, so why had she, inexplicably and unexpectedly, suddenly just lost all her courage to live?

What could have hurt a ten-year-old child to result in her reaching such a point? EZMdpD

This question had blazed in the hearts of her parents for every second since that day. If there was anyone who could tell them the truth behind this transformation, they were willing to give everything for that answer.

For parents, the most terrible thing was not that their children could be in danger, but rather that they were unaware of the circumstances when their child was in danger. 

Read more BL at chrysanthemumgarden (dot) com

Because they knew nothing about it, they didn’t even have the chance to try and save their child.

Song Wennuan finished reading all the posts seeking help that had been published by Gina’s parents in one breath, and felt a dull pain pounding in her heart. msToFY

With trembling fingertips, she compiled a long letter and sent it to their private mailbox, sincerely writing at the end—

【I don’t know what choice you will make. If you are willing to call the police, I will do everything I can to help you. If you choose to remain silent, I will also remain silent. After all, Gina is in such a bad situation now and she can no longer bear any more harm. May God bless you and Gina.】

The email was successfully sent. Song Wennuan then closed the laptop and fell into another long and silent wait.

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

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No one could confront the world just by themselves, for it was even more difficult to change the world using just that sole pair of hands. 

Her previous ambition, to be something like a savior, looked so ridiculous now.

Yu Yuntian must have known what she was doing, right? After all, she had taken so many paintings out of the house in such a flashy manner, and had even contacted the parents of several victims. eTUyiF

However, he hadn’t sent her any text messages, nor had he called to inquire or investigate, let alone implore her to stop what she was doing. It could be seen clearly that he was not worried at all. 

In all likelihood, in his opinion, all the efforts she had made up until now were equivalent to the desperate struggle of someone on their deathbed, making her seem like a clown.

Thinking of this, Song Wennuan covered her face and laughed mockingly.

No wonder Yu Yuntian had once said to her—“Your biggest shortcoming is your recklessness. You like to act rashly whenever you encounter any problems. This will not lead to any results.” pn4gtJ

Now look at her!

Here she was, posing as a savior for the children of the world and rushing forward to fight for so-called ‘justice’, but the truth was that she was only trampling them to the ground.

Did any of those people need her help? No! They all merely wished for her to stay away from them!

The private detective pulled out his cigarette case and said comfortingly, “Don’t laugh like that, it’s ugly. Take one, you’ll feel sober after smoking. You haven’t slept all night.” XkV4Cz

Song Wennuan lit a cigarette and inhaled it deeply. “Do you think I’m being ridiculous?”

“No, you’re cute.” The private detective looked at her messy hair that had turned into a bird’s nest and couldn’t help smiling. 

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

Song Wennuan also smiled at this, but her smile looked worse than her crying. 

After finishing the cigarette, she lit another, it seemed that she planned to use nicotine to numb herself, but at this moment, she heard a rapid ringing, and a long series of numbers flashed on her phone screen. The call was coming from the United States. GasIeq

The email had only been sent half an hour ago, but the other side had shown an eager response.

Song Wennuan held the phone, but didn’t have the courage to face what was to come. Instead, it was the private detective who grabbed the phone from her hands and accepted the call, turning the speaker mode on.

A long string of English sentences sounded from the other side. The speaker’s voice was filled with dense cries and unconcealed gratitude.

“Hello, is this Ms. Song? I’m Gina’s mother, Catherine Baker. I read your email and then had a long conversation with Gina. ReLdxr

“Oh God, she cried! Can you imagine? After three years of silence, this is the first time she has cried out in front of us! She finally reacted to the world, she confessed that what you told us is true, she confessed it to be true!”

Mrs. Baker couldn’t stop her tears, so she had to pause and adjust her emotions.

After a full ten second long pause, she choked up again as she said, “Ms. Song, thank you! Thank you very much! You gave us the answer that we have been searching for desperately for the past three years.

“Perhaps you don’t know how important this is or how much it means to us. This is our hope, this is salvation, this is the opportunity for us to start a new life! yJhEjz

“Gina had a long and sincere conversation with us for the first time in three years. Before she turned ten years old, she didn’t even know what it was that had happened to her. It wasn’t until that day three years ago, when she took a class in sexual education, that she finally figured it out.

“Can you imagine how she must have felt at that time?”

Song Wennuan finally recovered her senses and responded in fluent English, “Yes! I can fully understand her feelings! I’ve lived with Yu Yuntian for two years without any knowledge of this. I understand how terrible it is to only become aware of such a horrifying matter later. 

“All those previous experiences and memories turn into unbearable shrapnel as they slowly penetrate into your heart, but because there was no pain when they were happening, you have no idea what the consequences of these will be in the future. NFAQ7l

“However, the moment you finally know about it and comprehend its magnitude, you will find that those hidden shrapnel have already penetrated into your ventricles, torn apart your blood vessels, and have inflicted pain and despair upon you, but at that moment, you can see no way to save yourself. That is an impact more fatal than any kind of long-term suffering.”

Mrs. Baker’s repressed cry sounded from the speaker, “Yes, yes, it’s just like what you described. This bullet had always been hanging over Gina’s head, but it didn’t hit her until that day. She had no way to face it, and she collapsed. God, my poor child, I didn’t even know anything…”

Song Wennuan took the tissue offered by the private detective and wiped the tears that were dripping from the corner of her eyes, asking in a thick nasal voice, “What are you going to do? Report to the police or…”

Mrs. Baker suddenly became agitated. “Of course I will report to the police, is there even a second choice?” PBTljd

“But… Gina just attempted a suicide three months ago.”

“I know, of course I do. We are already in the worst possible situation, what could be worse than the situation now? Even if Gina was no longer here with us, we would still ensure that the person responsible for her death is not beyond the arm of the law. We will never let him go, never!

Chrysanthemum Garden.

“Ms. Song, we’ve already called the police. In fact, I’m calling to ask for your help. The police officer is also here. I’ll let him talk to you.”

The voice on the call soon changed into that of a calm male’s.  VT9tby

“Hello Ms. Song, I’m agent Will Bucott from the FBI. If you don’t believe me, we can switch to a video call and I’ll show you my credentials.”

Song Wennuan refused promptly. “There’s no need for that, let’s just leave it as it is. What do you need me to do?”

She still couldn’t believe that Gina’s parents had chosen to reach out to the police so quickly. 

So, why had she tossed about all night? MbQDke

As if in a trance, she suddenly remembered Fan Jialuo’s words— 

“It’s enough if you can get this one.”

“This will be his deadly arrow.”

It turned out that this really was a deadly arrow! Fan Jialuo was never wrong! So, had he also foreseen this event? And had she actually made the right choice? 3boFOP

Song Wennuan calmed herself down and tried to listen to what was being said on the other end of the call.

Officer Bucott said cautiously, “Ms. Song, according to our investigation, Yu Yuntian once conducted a free class, and taught children painting in the name of charity during his time studying in the United States, and it was during this period that Gina was violated.

“He spent five years studying in this country, and this kind of class was also conducted repeatedly over this period of five years. The number of children that registered and joined his classes has not yet been tallied, but it is certainly not a small number. So, we have every reason to believe that victims like Gina are by no means alone. 

“The FBI has taken over the case due to its importance, but the biggest difficulty we’re currently facing is that Yu Yuntian is in China, so it’s inconvenient for us to arrest him. If this news gets out, we are worried that he will abscond to other countries before we can get to him. xp8InS

“So Ms. Song, we’re calling to see if there’s any way you can get him to come to the United States from China?”

Without taking a moment to think, Song Wennuan agreed, “Yes, I can ensure that he comes to the United States.”

“Alright, thank you very much for your cooperation. Ms. Song, could you also send that painting, please? It is a very important piece of evidence. “

Song Wennuan said firmly, “I’ll bring it to you personally. It may not be very safe to ship it.” rzLXvJ

“If you could do so, that would be better. We’ll help you with all the travel procedures. God bless you, Ms. Song. Thank you!”

Then, Officer Bucott returned the phone to Mrs. Baker, who repeatedly thanked her in an incomparably grateful voice. Mr. Baker also leaned up to the receiver and cried, “God bless you.”

Chrysanthemum Garden.

For them, this was indeed the best possible blessing.

After hanging up the call, Song Wennuan immediately packed up the oil painting, while the private detective helped her in purchasing the plane ticket according to the instructions given by the FBI. e4HfBE

Before heading to the airport, Song Wennuan received a phone call from her cousin. He asked about the incident and soon learned that Gina had attempted suicide five times. 

Song Rui gently said, “I’ll go with you. I can provide psychological treatment for the child.”

“Really?” Song Wennuan’s eyes instantly reddened, and she muttered in a hoarse voice, “Cousin, you coming will be the real salvation. Gina’s parents will be happier to see you than me.

“This is great. Last night, I thought that there was no way to save these children, but this morning I learned that there still exists a way, a way to save the world! I’ll book your ticket now. Let’s meet at the airport.” 4CxeyW

Upon ending this call, Song Wennuan found it difficult to calm her emotions. With shaking hands, she dialed another number, and choking with emotion on the first word, declared, “Teacher Fan, I did it. I am now preparing to go to the United States.”

“Good. I wish you a safe journey.”

The youth’s gentle voice was the best soothing agent. In an instant, it warmed Song Wennuan’s heart, the very same heart that had been plunged into a deathly state ever since she had learned the truth.

She burst into tears. “Why do they all choose to stay silent? Why won’t they stand up for their children? Am I the one who’s wrong, or are they wrong?”  BpqhRa

The questions were like fishbones stuck in her throat. 

Fan Jialuo calmly replied, “No one is wrong. It’s just a matter of differing notions and customs. Our society lacks tolerance, so being silent can sometimes offer more protection to the children. Their society is more open-minded, so to step forward bravely and fight against injustice is their mainstream view.

“But the starting point on both sides is that it is all for the sake of the children. Thus, we really can’t say who is right and who is wrong.”

“I know. That’s why I feel even more sad. I feel so bad, so uncomfortable. How I wish I could change this society, but after all my efforts last night, I realized that I can’t do it. One’s own strength is too small!” zxspcw

“No you are wrong.” Fan Jialuo refuted her with a light smile, “One’s own strength is not small. When you make yourself more tolerant, peaceful and open-minded, the world will become more peaceful, tolerant and open-minded. As you make yourself better, the world is also becoming better, simply because you are a part of it. 

“When you pass this belief on and influence more people into bettering themselves, the whole world will also change accordingly. Right now, do you still feel that your efforts are not worth mentioning?”

Song Wennuan was already in a teary state. She shook her head desperately and said, “No, no, you’re right. To be good and to change yourself is to change the world. I understand. Thank you, Teacher Fan!”

“Don’t mention it. From the first time I saw you, I knew you were a brave one, because your soul was shining.” 75K2eU

Song Wennuan laughed dumbly. With just this affirmation, the pain, frustration, self-doubt and self-denial that she suffered from all night, all of it became insignificant.

She was hanging up a call once again, but this time, her heart was full of courage. Then, she dialed a number that she originally no longer dared to face.

Read more BL at chrysanthemumgarden (dot) com

The other side did not seem to not be willing to communicate with her, but still answered to her, afraid that she would behave recklessly and do things if not controlled.

After hesitating for a while, he answered the phone and asked impatiently, “What is it?” kG4yEh

“Big Brother, do you remember the words Grandpa said to us before he passed away?”

Brother Song remained silent.

Song Wennuan continued, “He said, ‘You two have to remember that in the future, you must possess much courage in order to achieve however much success you want. No matter what difficulties you face, the only thing you can do is meet them head-on, because your surname is Song.’

“Brother, I have never dared to forget these words since I was a child. If you want Nini to stand on the world stage, do you know what she needs to have first?  qgWNVf

“It’s not a silent form of escape, it’s not some sort of perfect protection, it’s a pair of legs that are unbending and a spine that is indomitable.  

“Brother, when you were blindly choosing to give in, did you ever ask for Nini’s opinion? She is a person who stayed calm even when she twisted her toes on the stage, and she even kept up with the rhythm. She is strong, how fragile do you think she is?”

She sped up her words and heightened her tone as she continued, “Brother, if you want to do something for Nini, then make it so that Yu Yuntian goes to the United States. I promise I won’t do anything unnecessary. Also, say sorry to Nini for me. I didn’t protect her well.”

“Okay, are you done? Then I’ll hang up.” Brother Song ended the call noncommittally. TdAFZP

Song Wennuan held onto the gradually cooling mobile phone tightly. The pain she felt in heart was beyond any description. 

This whole while, when she was fighting for her family, all she received from them in return was their indifference and a pile of misunderstanding. 

You could never truly imagine the suffering of such a thing without experiencing it for yourself.

*** apbwL6

Noks: I can’t wait for justice to be served cold…..

Frozenmirage: Let’s go for a trip, Dr. Song to the rescue!