Author: aji (あじ)
Translator: sleepingjay
36
With the passing of each day, my regret grew.
Before I fell asleep every night, my mind would inevitably recall Jill’s hurt face.
If only I hadn’t been so caught up in those stupid thoughts, if I had let myself be more open to Jill and his words, it wouldn’t have come to this. And yet here I was, because I was a person who couldn’t believe in anyone but myself.
I wonder, what would happen if I had believed in someone? All those times I had thought of placing my trust in someone, what would happen if I had actually done it?
But then again, wasn’t this situation I had ended up already enough of an answer….
I felt resigned to the truth I could see, yet I also felt contempt towards myself, for giving up, for letting go of everything so easily. The two feelings clashed inside me.
Compared to others before him, Jill might have been different. After all, Jill was a good person, the kind that would, no, had used the Spirit Drop for me when I was on the verge of death. He was the sort of man that used such an extremely precious treasure for a total stranger.
In ages past, before they found that the Spirit Drop had no effect unless it was in the hands of those blessed by the Spirits, a terrible number of people had fought against each other to obtain it. The value of this thing, in itself, could even urge a country into motion.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
It was said that by placing the Spirit Drop in their mouth, even the dead could come back to life. It could cure any illness. It could bring fortune to those who wore them on their bodies. The Spirit Drop was a precious treasure.
Ccv ab Alii, ktb tjv rjnfv wf fnfc ja atf fzqfcrf bo remt j qgfmlber atlcu, P tjv mgefiis ulnfc j xlmx ragjluta lc atf uear. P tjv agjwqifv tlr mbwqjrrlbc ecvfg ws offa.
Dea cb wjaafg tbk P gfugfaafv la, ecifrr P mbcnfsfv la ab Alii, ws gfugfa kbeivc’a gfjmt tlw. Qlat atf kjs atlcur kfgf cbk, atfgf kjr cb kjs atf rlaejalbc kbeiv ufa yfaafg ys larfio flatfg.
Yet, although I knew that in my head, I was scared to go see him.
I had told him to disappear, and had hurt him by saying I hated him. After doing those things, what kind of face should I use to see him?
When I thought of seeing those cold eyes again…… I wanted to run away.
It was terrifying, knowing that I was hated.
“……Ah, no way.”
When I raised my downcast face, the moonlight was shining in through the large window.
I thought I had only seen the sun starting to set a moment ago, but before I knew it, the sun had already vanished, leaving night behind. Work hours had already passed.
I was always like this lately. Even when I returned home, even the gathered spirits made me feel on edge and uneasy, like a fish out of water.
Somehow, I couldn’t bring myself to go home. While I was dithering on whether to take a walk instead, someone tapped me on the shoulder from behind.
“What are you doing here at this hour, Lilius?”
“……Hank. You’re one to talk, what are you doing here at this hour?”
Hank was standing there. Somehow, his large body felt small, as if it was curled up.
His tanuki ears twitched, and when my eyes followed the cute movement, Hank said with an awkward look:
“Ah. Uh, how do I put this, I want to make it up to you. ……If you’re free now, join me for a drink?”
“……”
“It’s my treat, of course.”
“…… I don’t have much appetite.”
“Isn’t that the same as always? Don’t worry about that. Let’s just go out, that’s an order from your boss.”
Hank patted me on the back with force that was a little too strong, laughing as he did so.
I was surprised by his smile. Since that day, Hank’s eyes had been dull and darkened, but now, I found a warm light in his eyes.
“Huh, you’ve changed.”
“…..Yeah. It seems like you flinging me around woke me up. I’m thanking you for that today.”
Hank pulled my arm and smiled wryly.
Infectiously, I returned a tiny laugh, and like that, we teleported to the bar.
Translator:
Lilius, fam, if you’re forgiving Hank, you’re literally obligated to forgive yourself too.
Also lmao at Lilius’s compulsive “beastman ears are cute AF” 1-cell-brain.
Ahhh 😢 I hope Lilius will find the courage to go see Jill. Thank you for the chapter!!!
The liquid kind XD
I hope not. Because if too much of that courage is used, chances are that he won’t remember what he did or said. And that would be a complete disaster.
Thanks for the chapter!
Sigh… communication between Jill and Lilius is key.
Thanks for the chapter <3
Why can’t Andrea run away again and that way Lily Will have an excuse to visit Jill!!! 😔
Thanks for the chapter!
Another case of my kids having problems with communicating with each other haha.. lol ei Jill you really have beast ear fetish huh huehuehue
Thank you so much for the chapter!!!~ 🙇🏻🙇🏻🙇🏻🙇🏻🙇🏻🙇🏻
I know lilius hurt Jill, but Jill was no peach either. I swear if it really ends up just lulius apologizing with Jill having no character development I’m going to scream!!! Poor lilius😭
Thanks for the chapter!
Same T∆T… I really hope both would apologize to each other like lilius should be more calm and don’t let his emotion control him while Jill need to be more understanding and don’t talk to lilius like lilius is his teammates/soldiers ;’)
Sorry but…. I kinda forgot who Hank is :’)
Lillius, boy, you have EVERY right to not believe on anyone but yourself after all those things. You suffered too much with no one by your side. It is easy for them to judge you and your past without even understanding a single bit about it. You have EVERY right to be closed off from people. But you should know that you also have EVERY right to forgive yourself and understand that you still haven’t moved on from the past. You are scared of the past happening again but you should also see the wonders of life. Life is amazing too if you look past those terrible humans. BUT! You don’t have to force yourself in accepting Jill or his kindess. I think it’s time for you to decide for yourself, Lillius; not because of what Jill feels or what others feels. Decide of what you feel.
thanks for the chapter!
It is kinda sus….