At 10:30 in the morning, Li Xiaoyu awakened in a daze owing to the sunlight diffusing through the window curtains. She turned over and took the phone from the bedside table to check the time.
She originally meant to retire to bed before twelve o’clock last night, but she accidently brushed Weibo until two o’clock in bed. After putting down her phone, she lay staring at the ceiling, and outlined her new article. It is said that a meng CP is the primary production force, which was perfectly reflected in Li Xiaoyu. She had an affluent background and was a college student with plenty of time on her hands. She used to give money and send presents when she chased stars. But ever since she became a meng CP fan, she opened Word for the first time to create fan fiction as if she was fighting chicken blood everyday, one after the other. She decided to write a fanfic about past life and present life this time around – an exceptionally abusive past life; an exceptionally beautiful present life. It started with 300,000 words and was intended to end in a month.
It was four o’clock when she checked her watch last before going to bed and had meant to sleep until noon, but her biological clock was too brutal and woke her up at half past ten. She wriggled for a little while on the bed enveloped in the duvet, put down the phone, and closed her eyes with the intention to continue sleeping, but after a minute, she picked the phone up again and clicked on the familiar forum page.
—An Ruifeng’s official fan website was the spot where An Ruifeng’s “Maple Leaf” fans gathered the most. In addition to writing fiction, talking about gossip on this fan site, sharing gorgeous images, and being obsessed with idols were the things that Li Xiaoyu did most to kill time every day.
The reason Li Xiaoyu liked An Ruifeng was simple: he was so handsome! An Ruifeng made his debut as an idol male star. He only appeared in major productions and played the role of Mr. Handsome Guy. Although his acting skills were raw at first, he quickly matured, and with the sharp facial features of a mixed-race person, a smile from him on TV was enough to captivate female fans. Li Xiaoyu loved speaking in the forum and was willing to spend money on tea breaks and bouquets for the crew and its press conferences. She quickly rose to prominence among fans, rising to the position of deputy head of S city’s fan club in less than two years.
An unknown small singer appeared beside An Ruifeng only a year and a half ago. When the small artist named Ling Xi first appeared on camera with An Ruifeng, almost all fans chastised him for hugging An Ruifeng’s thighs to gain popularity. Only Li Xiaoyu, who had keen eyes, deduced that they must have been sweethearts in a previous life who would marry in this life. When they meet, they’ll inevitably rock the world.
It was only logical that Li Xiaoyu had embarked on the path of constantly writing and spewing brain holes – if writing fanfiction was considered a “path,” she had undoubtedly become immortal.
Li Xiaoyu was fully aware of the fandom’s breadth, so she created a sockpuppet account after becoming a fan of this CP. As more people fell into this pit, her alternate account became the trailblazer, and her stories became works that shook the fandom.
After posting a bunch of updates, someone referred to her wife in the comment area and wanted to hug her thigh. She responded righteously to such a remark:
“I’m not the wife; I’m merely a bearer of their love.”
It was a really emotional and simple love.
Li Xiaoyu, who was resting in bed, wanted to play with her phone for a few minutes before going back to sleep, but the more she brushed, the more awake she grew. She would have yelled and executed a Thomas flair on the bed, followed by a volley for three and a half spins if her parents weren’t watching TV in the living room.
There was no other rationale: at ten a.m. this morning, the official Weibo of a popular variety show released teasers, hinting at the intimate interaction between the cast of “Jian Jue Tianxia,” which won seven Golden Panda Awards, and the live audience in the upcoming episode. Pictures taken by fans began to circulate as early as last week. An Ruifeng and Ling Xi were said to have interacted very sweetly at the scene. When they were grouped to play the red-blue confrontation game, a member of the red team tightly gripped the blue team’s Ling Xi’s waistband. As a result, An Ruifeng, another member of the red team, knocked his hand off.
Li Xiaoyu’s brain hole was opened wide by this set of pictures, and she wrote a PG-18 fanfic that night.
And the video footage released this morning was so meng that Li Xiaoyu almost had a hypoxia attack!
Before the show was recorded, the host asked the stars to hand over their wallets in the backstage dressing area and exposed the contents of the wallets on the spot. The recently incredibly popular variety show queen Zhu Linlin had a selfie photo in her wallet, the male lead Bao Hui had condoms hidden in the wallet’s interlayer, and Ling Xi’s wallet unexpectedly held a yellow talisman!
The host begged Ling Xi to show the audience the talisman, but Ling Xi, who was generally a good sport, declined.
“This talisman was handed to me by the old Taoist priest on location – that Taoist temple – when I was filming there previously. This type of talisman must be carried on one’s person at all times and cannot be shown to anyone at will until the wish is granted. So please accept my apologies for not being able to unfold it.”
“In that case, could you tell us what kind of talisman this is?” the host inquired.
“Yin yuan harmony talisman,” Ling Xi smiled, exposing his white teeth.
“Yin yuan? I had previously watched the award ceremony. Ling Xi, you already have a lover, right? Are they also a part of the circle?”
Ling Xi deftly evaded the subject: “I’m no longer in the entertainment circle, so why talk about ‘also’?”
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
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“Qtb rjlv la kjr oeioliifv? Zjggljuf lr obg j ilofalwf,” Olcu Wl aliafv tlr tfjv jcv rwlifv risis. “Zs ilof lrc’a bnfg, rb tbk mjc la yf vffwfv ugjcafv?”
… …
This segment wasn’t particularly exciting, but just a few moments later, An Ruifeng produced his wallet at the request of the host – he too had a talisman in the photo holder!
The host laughed, asking if the talisman in An Ruifeng’s hand matched Ling Xi’s talisman.
An Ruifeng burst out laughing: “How is it even possible? I went to the Taoist temple by myself a few months back and requested this talisman. You are welcome to take a look at it.” He displayed his talisman as he said this, but the vermillion calligraphy on it was too elegant. The camera swept over it, but the content was obscured.
When the host inquired about the talisman, An Ruifeng replied: “This is my fáng shì hé xié talisman. This wish has come true, so I can show it to you whenever I want and let everyone share my joy.”
The host’s face blanched, her red lips opening wide enough to swallow an apple. She repeatedly asked An Ruifeng if he had a lover. She understood that if this information was exposed on their show, there would be a riot among fans and the show’s ratings would skyrocket.
The male star, who had enthralled thousands of fans, seemed perplexed in front of the camera: “What lover? Isn’t ‘fáng shì hé xié’ used for buying a house? I just purchased a couple houses as an investment, and everything went smoothly, so I declared that my wish had come true.”
In the camera shot, his agent Xu-ge, who was highly familiar to fans, walked over with a dark face and murmured a few words in his ear. An Ruifeng’s demeanor changed from surprise to shame. Then, he coughed nervously and said to the cameraman, “Oh!… So that’s what fáng shì means. I’m sorry. You know that I grew up in Maple Leaf Country so there are some Panda Country words that I don’t understand very well. I made a joke.”
After such humorous little tidbits were disclosed, fans discussed heatedly, and Li Xiaoyu, a die-hard An Ruifeng x Ling Xi CP fan, had melted into a puddle of syrup in the bedroom. Her mouth was not her mouth, it was the crescent moon in the night. Her brain was not her brain, but a bowl of sweet and spicy pig brain. The stars in the sky were obviously the fireworks she exploded.
She wanted to fly out of the window and use a megaphone to alert everyone in the town that her meng CP had delivered sugar!!!!
She instantly watched this ten-minute video twice. When it came to the third time, she covered her heart with one hand and put the other hand on the pause button. She halted after playing practically every frame for concern that her heart would not be able to withstand it triggering blood reflux. After seeing it three times in a row, she took a deep breath and dropped on the bed. She felt that the love filling the screen was threatening to suffocate her.
After calming herself with difficulty for a long period, she logged on to the forum to locate a post to discuss. As she suspected, the most debated post on the forum was regarding this topic.
Because the landlord was not a CP powder, the main post’s content was about An Ruifeng’s “dumb cuteness.” She stated that after watching the video clip, she thought the silly Prince An was very cute (the landlord used this word boldly), but she didn’t expect him to make such a ridiculous mistake after living in Panda Country for so many years.
The discussion in the comments section below this post was very lively. Everyone laughed one after the other, and one of the more enthusiastic fans expressed a desire to personally teach An Ruifeng what fáng shì was. Li Xiaoyu went to the other party’s homepage and discovered that it was actually a male fan!
As a result, after a few floors of reading, a discordant voice appeared.
“I predicted as soon as the video was released that the powder of a minor celebrity who has left the circle would begin to jump again. He held Prince An’s thigh before leaving the circle, and he’s still selling rot after leaving? Prince An made a point of going ‘alone’ to get the talisman, hehe.”
Li Xiaoyu didn’t even need to visit the dissenting party’s homepage. She knew who was causing trouble – it had to be the CP demolishing duì jiā!
An Ruifeng had a large number of CP fans. Many of the actresses who had worked with him had hyped up dating scandals with him, but An Ruifeng hadn’t been particularly close to any of them. Two rotten CP groups had gradually grown with roughly the same number of fans in each group since a year ago. The two sides were “as incompatible as fire and water,” practically fighting each other whenever they met.
One of the CP powder groups was AnLing powder, where Li Xiaoyu belonged, while the other was an incomparably evil cult – it was actually the brothers CP powder An Ruifeng x Andrew…
No way! Uncle, we don’t eat this CP!
When Andrew first returned to his home country, he and An Ruifeng participated on several shows together. The two were blood brothers and grew up in Maple Leaf Country. There were endless embraces, pats on the shoulders, and cheek kisses to convey their happiness. In addition, they were both gorgeous. Brothers CP powder sprouted up overnight like mushrooms in an autumn forest, and poked their heads in the pile of maple leaves all over the ground.
As the boss of AnLing powder, Li Xiaoyu worked her heart out to write articles, photoshop pictures, and make MVs. Relying on her eyes that were excellent at discovering gay love and the bottomless black hole in her brain, she had accumulated a basket of meng points. After that, she made door-to-door sales like The Little Match Girl and managed to sell a few meng points with tremendous difficulty, gathering a surge of fans… In the end, the duì jiā always set off Some! Big! Trick!
Today, the brothers attended a certain red carpet event together. Tomorrow, the brothers endorsed such-and-such product together. The day after tomorrow, the brothers were photographed shopping for clothes together. This pair of demonic brothers merely needed to stand there, and the CP powder gathered instantly like bees that smelled nectar.
Now that their AnLing CP finally gave out candy, the duì jiā actually came out to criticize and ridicule. Li Xiaoyu was like a hydrogen balloon that ran into Mars and exploded quickly.
She clicked on the reply tab furiously, and tap-tap-tap composed a long paragraph.
Fenglin Whisperer: Yes, I want to put some CP powder on my face. The brothers walk to a convenience store and you obscenely remark they went to buy condoms, but you’re not content seeing a talisman in Ling Xi’s wallet. Little Princess’s hands are far too long. Was that Taoist temple erected by your family? Was the ink on the talisman paper donated by your family? Did you drop that wallet? If not, what are you foolishly arguing about!
Within a minute after her reply was delivered, many private messages came in from the back-end. She had engaged in many fights previously, but never once did so many people send her private messages. She went to check in uncertainty, but saw that all the private messages said one thing—
XXX: Fenglin Whisperer, I didn’t expect you to be an AnLing CP powder!
Only then did Li Xiaoyu realize she had forgotten to switch her account. In her desperation, she had forgotten to login to her secret nympho CP secondary account and had responded straight using her primary account. Her main ID was well-known in the fandom. She had numerous times arranged for Maple Leafs to engage in activities, and she had even communicated with Xu Zhiqiang, An Ruifeng’s agent. Now, such a “heavyweight” member of the fan group actually exposed her identity as a rotten CP fan, which was immediately followed by busybodies stripping her of the special alternate account created for her fanfics, and many pure An Ruifeng fans found it unacceptable, to the point where some people demanded that she be expelled from her powder membership and stripped of her position as the group’s deputy head.
When confronted with these little s*tupid c*nts, Li Xiaoyu merely chuckled and ignored them. Anyway, she’d now revealed her identity, so she simply spent 999 forum coins (equal to 999 Panda Country currency) to edit the forum alternate account she’d used for three years, and then argued with the posters under the brand-new “Fengling Whisper” ID.
She was an expert at scolding the opposing party and making them cry without saying a single foul word. She was on fire, and it wasn’t long before those who were clamoring for her expulsion went offline quietly.
Li Xiaoyu, who had won by a landslide, raised her chin in front of the screen, snorted in derision as she rose from her bed, and dressed in high spirits.
Her meng CP had sent sugar today, and she was going out to buy, buy, buy.
Li Xiaoyu was a demure and polite girl in real life, despite her bold and vigorous online persona. Her wardrobe consisted largely of exquisite dresses. With her waist-length curly hair and well-matched accessories, she was a typical lady no matter which way you looked.
Many guys enjoyed flaunting themselves in front of her, but they had no idea that when they spoke, the barrage of roasting in her head was thick enough to cover their faces.
After getting dressed, Li Xiaoyu headed to a certain business street. When the cab was still two kilometers from the commercial district, traffic coordinators blocked the highway with barriers to direct traffic around the front.
Li Xiaoyu lowered the car window and inquired as to why they were unable to enter.
The coordinator motioned to the front of the rod: “In the front, a show is being recorded. Motor cars are not permitted to enter, however pedestrians can enter.”
Li Xiaoyu considered it and indicated for the taxi to pull over. She saw celebrities a lot because she was pursuing An Ruifeng everywhere, so she wasn’t as interested in watching stars record shows as other people. She came here today solely to go shopping. She simply walked in because pedestrians were permitted. In any case, two kilometers was not far away, so she saw it as exercise.
She stepped out of the car and began walking down the business street. The location at which the driver pulled over was not on the main road. Rather, it was at the beginning of a narrow lane. It was nearly midday, and the alley should have been deserted, but there were numerous older women standing at the door, squinting and basking in the sun. Li Xiaoyu strolled across the alley, her face expressionless. In fact, she was mentally replaying the sugar she ate in the morning.
Just as she passed the intersection of the two alleys, a woman dressed in sportswear dashed out of the intersection. The woman grasped Li Xiaoyu’s hand and spoke swiftly, before Li Xiaoyu could scream in fear: “Hello! Do you know me? My name is Zhu Linlin. We’re currently filming a show, and the other guests are after me. Can I swap clothes with you?”
Li Xiaoyu took a closer look and discovered that the woman who made the audacious request was indeed Zhu Linlin, the wildly successful variety show actress this year. Zhu Linlin was on a roll these days. She used to be a little-known singer but had somehow hugged the thigh of an outdoor variety show. She immediately transitioned from a temporary guest to a resident cast member because she was physically active, unassuming, both good-looking and “vicious and cruel.” Her popularity had progressively increased, and several variety programs had paid a lot of money to have her.
Li Xiaoyu knew her before she was famous. She had listened to her songs and understood that she and Ling Xi debuted at the same time, and that her music was dynamic and seductive, similar to dance music, but people didn’t buy it. The most crucial point was that she and Ling Xi had long been rumored to be in a relationship, and she also starred in “Jian Jue Tianxia.” In the hearts of CP powder, she was “An Ruifeng’s love rival” and “Ling Xi’s ex-girlfriend.” Some CP fans who shot their mouths off also referred to her as the offensive “third party“.
Li Xiaoyu, on the other hand, bore her no ill will. On the contrary, she enjoyed her show a lot. She asked, looking behind Zhu Linlin: “Are you participating in a program? Did you lose your follow PD again?”
Zhu Linlin laughed heartily: “You appear to be a regular viewer of the show. Prior to my debut, I participated in athletics, concentrating in triathlons. I can outrun regular men in high heels, not to mention the fact that he’s carrying a camera. Come on, let’s go change our clothing…” She paused and stared at Li Xiaoyu for a few seconds before asking, “Miss, have we met before?”
Zhu Linlin nodded, as if answering her own question, rather than waiting for Li Xiaoyu to ridicule her late-action way of striking up a conversation: “So it’s you, I recognize you. Aren’t you named something something yu?”
Zhu Linlin was delighted by Li Xiaoyu’s worried expression.
Zhu Linlin admired her expression for three seconds with satisfaction before answering her questions readily. Zhu Linlin was not the type of person who liked to keep people on edge. Being blunt suited her personality better. “You’re a fan of An Ruifeng, right? If I’m not mistaken, you’re the fan group’s leader, right? When our team visited S and N cities to promote, you arranged a group of little girls to pick him up, as well as a lot of bouquets and tea-time snacks for the press conference.”
Li Xiaoyu felt that this female star was quite attentive, and exclaimed: “You have a good memory.”
“It depends on the individual. Big breasted beauties always leave a deep impression on me,” Zhu Linlin said with a small smile.
“……”
They randomly picked a public restroom by the wayside to switch their clothing, and by the time the two of them stepped out, Zhu Linlin had transformed into an intellectual beauty. She lowered the brim of the wide-brimmed sun hat, and checked her disguise in the window of a storefront with delight, confidently asserting: “With the way I’m dressed currently, no one from the show team can recognize me from behind.”
She hardly finished speaking, when numerous staff members rushed in helter-skelter from the entrance of the alley. One of them carried a camera, someone had a notepad, some were carrying audio equipment, while others who seemed to be assistants followed them anxiously like a swarm of bees. They were yelling as they rushed, “Aiya! That great aunt truly is all legs under her neck. Where did she run away?”
Li Xiaoyu: “…” A compass(drafting) is all legs under the neck, right?
Before the two parted, Zhu Linlin and Li Xiaoyu exchanged phone numbers, agreeing that following the recording of the show, Zhu Linlin would launder the clothing and send them to Li Xiaoyu’s home.
Li Xiaoyu thought it was a very intriguing experience. She casually went out shopping and bumped into the recording site of the show. She also traded clothes with a female star, and obtained her phone number. Each of these events was enough to turn into a topic of idle talk. Coupled with the sugar put out by her meng CP this morning, this day was utterly dreamy.
Before turning around and fleeing, Zhu Linlin expressed her gratitude to Li Xiaoyu once more: “Thank you very much for your clothes. They’ll be quite useful in the next segment – by the way, you have a fantastic figure. I can’t just take your clothes. I can assist you if you need a celebrity’s autograph and a group photo.”
Li Xiaoyu’s ears flushed with embarrassment at her compliment. After hearing Zhu Linlin’s words, she instantly shook her head: “No, no, there is no need. I’m just interested in two stars right now, and I have their signatures, so there’s no need to trouble you.”
“Two?” Zhu Linlin cocked her brows and stared into Li Xiaoyu’s eyes, smiling faintly. She suddenly took a step forward, closing the gap between them, and kissed her pink face, leaving a light lipstick mark, before Li Xiaoyu could react.
“In that case, consider this kiss a thank-you gift.” Zhu Linlin took a healthy step back, raised her right hand, brought her index and middle fingers close to her head, and swung her wrist to salute the little beauty who was scared by her. “I also hope that when we meet again, I can become the third star you like.”
She lowered her torso, moved her ankles, and dashed towards the business street like a swift leopard. The broad skirt swayed in the breeze, like flowers in the air.
It took a long time for Li Xiaoyu, who had been left in the same spot, to regain her composure. She reached out her hand to hold herself against the wall beside her, concerned that her legs, which were as soft as noodles, wouldn’t be able to support her body.
—No one would believe that she was sexually harassed by the “third party” in her meng CP…
[End]
That was amusing
what a day o.o
Thx for the ch (ㅅ˘ㅂ˘)
Aaaaaaaa I ship them hhhhhh Zhu Linlin may have found his wife huh~
Thanks for the chapter ❤️❤️
⊙.☉(⑉⊙ȏ⊙)(ﾉﾟ0ﾟ)ﾉ~
Thanks for the chapter <3
I want this cp, I want this cp so much that I….. forgot what I wanted to say.😅😅😅
need an entire book about them oh I love women
Zhu is hopeful of getting rid of her single status!!
Cuties!!!!!!!!!!