497
After being raised like cattle by Jiang Ran for a few days, I grew one size fatter and felt more energised.
Man, it feels amazing to laze around~
498
I had to prepare for the livestream with Jiang Ran tonight. My novel fans had all switched camps after I accidentally dropped my vest. It was also this old fogey’s first time showing his face on livestream, so the entire internet exploded when the news came out.
Ah, so this is how it feels like to be famous.
Jiang Ran, as always, wore a suit for the livestream. I casually put on a Nyanko-sensei hooded sweater.
The sleeves of the sweater were long, which could cover the bandages on my hand. I didn’t want to sell a sob story for my very first livestream.
My management company and the streaming platform even invited a young lady to host the livestream for us.
She smiled radiantly when she saw us walk in. “I heard that President Jiang has been taking care of Shuyao the entire time he’s injured. You seem to have a really good relationship.”
“It’s only expected.” Jiang Ran also returned a smile in kind.
I kept getting this irksome feeling that something was off.
499
When I sat down with Jiang Ran, the cologne on him was especially noticeable.
I clucked my tongue in disdain. “People can’t smell anything through the livestream, what on earth did you spray cologne for?”
“This is the only one I use, it is also the scent that I like the most. I only use it for formal occasions.” Jiang Ran’s eyes crinkled as he looked at me. “If you like it, I can give you a bottle.”
Who’d want your stuff. I sniffed again. But this cologne of his did smell quite good.
It was simple and unpretentious, not like those bleeping stuff on the market that could haze people to death.
Sure, just send some over if you want.
Let me bathe in the smell of the rich.
500
The livestream started.
The host passed us a pillow in the shape of their streaming platform logo. It was a small koi. I couldn’t help but fiddle with its tail. It was soft and soothing to the touch.
“Don’t play around with it, the injury on your hand hasn’t fully recovered yet.” Jiang Ran said quietly in my ear.
Tch. Buzzkill. I secretly rolled my eyes at him.
The host sent us a resigned look. “Can the two of you stop flirting with your eyes? Please look at the lens, the netizens are getting anxious from the wait already.”
“……” My words immediately caught in my throat.
No wonder I kept feeling like there were eyes on me when I entered the room.
That group of burning book girls must have sent this young lady over to stir things up!
501
I hurriedly looked towards the lens, giving it a standard smile.
We first made our greetings, then reported how the injury has been healing and our general wellbeing.
The host asked me, “How is the filming progressing with this wound?”
I went mute at this. I couldn’t just shamelessly say that I’ve just been loafing around the past couple of days, right?
Next to me, Jiang Ran leisurely replied, “His scenes have been pushed back. The schedule of the production crew was adjusted and the damages were deducted from my pockets; after all, I was the one who caused his injury.”
For real?? I didn’t expect that in the days that I’ve been muddling past, Jiang Ran actually did so much for me without a word.
I suspected that, like me, the netizens in the chat barrage were also moved to tears by what Film Emperor Jiang did.
After we mucked our way through the starting, the host walked over. “Our online friends say that they want this livestream to be more interactive. I’ll pass the phone to you so you can see the screen.”
“Okay.” Jiang Ran nodded. “It isn’t convenient for Teacher Mo to hold it, so you can just pass it to me.”
502
When Jiang Ran took the phone, he pointed it at himself like taking a photo with the front camera.
“Eh, don’t hold it that way. Straighten your arm and hold it at a 45-degree angle.” I instructed from the side.
Learnt, Jiang Ran nodded, holding that long arm of his pencil-straight.
“Oy, that’s too far away, I can’t see the chat barrage.”
I fought my way closer, accidentally butting my head into Jiang Ran’s shoulder.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“Vb miewrs.” Aljcu Ejc ibbxfv bnfg, erlcu j tjcv ab qbrlalbc ws tfjv qgbqfgis.
P uijgfv ja tlw teoolis.
503
Mlcjiis, Aljcu Ejc uba atf qgbqfg qbrlalbc obg atf qtbcf vbkc. P rjk ws cjwf oibbvlcu atf fcalgf yjggjuf:
> Mdm. Mo Ji, when you’re done acting, will you come back and finish filling your writing pit?
> Teacher, why are you acting the shou? Camping for your answer!
> +1, you took the words right out of my mouth.
> +10086, ten thousand people have signed a petition in blood for you to answer this!
“……”
P ajmalmjiis mtbrf rlifcmf. Qts jgf atf kbgvr bo sbecu ijvlfr cbkjvjsr rb yieca?
Did I want to act as the shou? With the way laozi wrecks heaven and earth, ofc I’m a gong!
So I heaved a long sigh. “It was arranged by the management company, I didn’t have any say in it. If I had a choice, someone as awesome as me would definitely be acting as Shen Linhe.”
“Pfft.” Unexpectedly, Jiang Ran actually gave a low chuckle.
“Hey! Jiang Ran, what are you laughing at? You stole my role yet you dare to laugh at me?!”
The corners of Jiang Ran’s lips were still raised in a slight radian. He slanted his head over to look at me, “I just find it quite cute how your novel fans are calling you Ji’er, it reminds me of a little yellow chicken I once saw online.”
“Who are you calling a little yellow chicken!” I was halfway to my grave from rage, almost leaping from the sofa. “You’re talking about that budgie meme set, right? I’ve a whole pack, if you like it I can send some over to you later.”
“Sounds good.” He laughed softly at me.
504
The host reminded us, “It’s like fate had brought the two of you to co-star together, it’s too wondrous for words. Teacher Mo, do you feel that Jiang Ran has portrayed the character you had in mind?”
Remembering that I had successfully casted myself in a Jiang Ran fanboy image not too long ago, I immediately transformed into a brainless fan, blowing ten thousand words of rainbowfart praise with prose and metaphors.
“Of course. Film Emperor Jiang’s acting technique is marvellous and majestic. It pierces deep into the marrow, forbidding and powerful, like the frigid chill of a snow mountain. Every time I have lines with him, I see the roaring torrent of a river, the cerulean blue of the sky, and the sharp ferocity of an eagle. It collided with my soul and enhanced my life, and I’m caught, unable to escape for a long time…”
When I finished speaking, Jiang Ran couldn’t hold back his laughter. His shoulders were shaking madly.
How’s that? Aren’t you deeply moved by me?
“Wow, Teacher Mo, you really live up to your reputation as a novelist, words flow from your mouth as from the pen of a master.”
Rubbish. We all went through the same twelve-year compulsory education, I’m just that good—I’m the sparkliest, most stellar bullshitter.
Fanboy image, get √
505
The host asked again, “Then, how about Jiang Ran? What’s your evaluation of Teacher Mo?”
As if to express himself better, Jiang Ran gently hooked my fingers.
?! Jiang Ran? What are you doing??
Unfortunately, my hand was injured so I didn’t have any way of flinging him away.
He massaged the knuckles of my fingers with his slender hand for a while before saying, “I really like Teacher Mo…”
I stared at the chat barrage. Little did I expect that at the moment Jiang Ran paused, the barrage would freeze.
“…Teacher Mo’s acting technique.”
??? Those last two words, did the stream catch them?
506
“Miss Host, the connection seems to be stuck.” I projected my pleading gaze towards her.
“Ah? How can that be?” The young lady walked over. The interface was still frozen, intermittently refreshing:
> What? What did Jiang Ran just say? He really likes Teacher Mo?
> holyshit I boarded a real ship!
> AHHH BB GIRLS HAVE SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTED!
……
WTF??
507
After a minute thereabout, the interface finally returned to normal.
“Sorry, the connection got stuck,” I hurriedly explained. “Just now Jiang Ran said that what he liked was my acting technique, the last two words didn’t get streamed. Don’t misunderstand!”
However, my explanation was like trying to put out a blazing cartload of firewood with a cup of water. The chat barrage was still a roaring mess of incoherent screaming.
Despicable. Jiang Ran, will it kill you to just say things in one breath??
I was so pissed that my face was turning ashen.
508
Fortunately, the host was both beautiful and kind-hearted, rescuing me from my embarrassment. “How about this, the earlier one doesn’t count. Jiang Ran, please evaluate Teacher Mo from a different perspective.”
“Okay.” Jiang Ran smiled. “Teacher Mo is a very brave man. No matter how severely injured he is, he never shouts in pain. In the few days that I’ve been taking care of him, I feel that this is the way real men should be, doing ass…”
And here, the screen frigging hung again!
“…doing as real men should.” Yet, knowing nothing of it, he finished the latter half of the sentence.
!!!
Wts, what kind of trashy internet connection is this?
The heavenly net has vast meshes, yet it lets nothing but gay through??
509
When the interface finally recovered, the chat barrage had already imploded.
I explained non-stop, yet what was returned were the heartless taunting of the chat barrage:
> How did you take ♂ care of him? I’ve a friend who says she wanna s e e.
> President Jiang is right, this is what real men do. [doge]
> Ji’er, just beat it. As the film emperor’s man, you’re pretty much set for life!
> AHHHH! Did they expose themselves on livestream?!
510
The barrage interface froze up many times.
To be precise, a dedicated netizen counted it—it froze exactly seven times.
Seven times in a night, a whole seven times, yo!!
And so we gained a new nickname:
Seven climaxes a night.
I think that the Burning Book fandom is having a field day.
I regret this so much that even my intestines have turned ashen.
If I knew this would happen, I wouldn’t have invited Jiang Ran to livestream with me.
[fat otaku tears.jpg]
511
When we finally reached the last segment, the host took out a paper box, asking us to draw a strip of paper from it to pick a topic for the other.
I frowned, saying in aggrievement, “I can’t do that, my hand’s injured. This is unfair.”
Jiang Ran softly pressed my palm. “The wound has already been stitched, it should be fine for you to move it a little.”
I could only use two trembling fingers to clip out a piece of paper.
The host helped us open it—’sappy love lines’.
The host immediately grew excited. “That’s great. Jiang Ran, please say a sappy love line to Teacher Mo.”
“What’s a sappy love line?” Jiang Ran looked embarrassed. “Does it mean that I should say it in dialect?”
Me, “……”
The host, “……”
512
Thankfully, the host reacted quickly, whipping out a phone and passing it to Jiang Ran.
“You can pick any among these. However, when you say it, you have to gaze into his eyes~”
My heart crawled at the tone with which the host said this.
Jiang Ran very solemnly nodded, passing the phone used for the livestream back to her. He lowered his head, going through them.
Then, he turned over to look at me, the corners of his lips subtly curving upwards.
“Do you know why my name is Jiang Ran?”
Har??
Which site did he get this love line from?
I showed a look of disbelief.
Jiang Ran moved a little closer, interlacing our fingers.
“Because I will light a burning fire in your heart.”
!!!
Holy shit, this old fogey actually improvised on the spot?
What is this godly learning ability??
B-b-but, that isn’t the point.
His smile was very faint, with just the slightest bit of a twinkle in his eyes, while saying flirtatious words in a completely serious manner.
It’s slightly… provocative…
My body jolted.
I didn’t have to look at the chat barrage. I already knew. It was definitely another blazing cremation for those who had overdosed on dogfood.
513
“Whoa, it’s so special, you actually made one up yourself.” The host kept applauding. “Jiang Ran, it’s your turn to choose a topic for Teacher Mo.”
Jiang Ran nodded. He withdrew that earlier teasing note in his smile, reaching over to pick a strip of paper.
It was a talent show.
I instantly felt that the chance for me to regain my dignity was here. This gacha mechanism is really wonderful!
The ‘little brother who can otaku dance’ image is a gem!
So I immediately got to my feet. “I can dance Gokuraku Jodo.”
“No.” Jiang Ran straightaway rained on my parade. “Mo Shuyao, your hand is still injured, how are you going to dance?”
“Even if I reduce the actions involving my hands, my dancing will still be as captivating!”
Saying this, I proudly puffed up my chest.
The host smiled as well. “Come on then, our online friends can’t wait to watch it.”
514
One, two, three, starto~
Although my hand movements were somewhat restrained, this didn’t hinder me from twisting my old, cranky waist to the butterfly steps.
Hehe, I’m the handsomest pup in the livestream today~
However, when I turned half a round and faced Jiang Ran, I saw that this bastard was actually using his phone to record me!
I viciously rolled my eyes at him.
Jiang Ran shrugged, mouthing at me: ‘Incredible, keep going.’
Me, “……”
515
AHHHH! My bewitching dance momentum was recorded by him!
This is infringement, I’m going to report you!
516
However, what I could never have imagined had yet to come.
When my song ended, Jiang Ran got up and walked over. He held my waist.
With just a little pull, I was plastered to his body.
He rubbed my waist, as if wanting to add fuel to the fire. “Teacher Mo is indeed a timeless treasure.”
I turned into stone on the spot.
And the chat barrage—once again, and a g a i n, and a g a i n—exploded.
jiang ran ahhhhh teach me your tricks! i want to learn!!
kyaaaa
Why am I the only one super annoyed by how handsy he is?
Thanks for the chapter <3
+1
thanks for the chapter ♡
Sksjjzhxbsjsjsbzb
Thank you~
Gosh this is so much fun… 😂😂😂😂
Thank you for the update ❤️
Gosh ! Just to much dog food!! Thank you
Aaaacccckkkkkkk!! My Heart🤧🦋✨✨