Anyone who has succeeded on a diet will tell you as they make a berry bowl and sneak chocolate bark into it that destroys their caloric deficit: Part of long-term success is knowing how to scratch an itch without going into a full binge. The occasional ice cream keeps you from gastric bypass, or… something to that effect.
Wei Qing doesn’t want to go on a binge. He’s sure he’ll lose Yue Fei forever, if he’s dumb enough to do that. But he also doesn’t want to take liberties, or be a predator. He just wants to let go, just a little bit.
Wei Qing, still oversensitized despite the lavender, and hard despite the muscle relaxer, sighs and swipes into his private messaging service. Just a little down and dirty, just enough for him to find some release without giving into his brain’s calls for him to build a fantasy around Yue Fei.
He knows once he pops that particular top, he really, really won’t be able to stop. And the walls of this place are not built to support the secrecy that would require. Logistically, not to mention ethically, it’s best to maintain some semblance of control.
So-
Maintenance.
Casual, no strings attached, no touch. Just the comfort of someone faceless and uncomplicated, someone that knows his preferences, without knowing him at all. Naturally, this is not a fishing expedition, a random stranger won’t cut it.
He has two long-standing favorites; camboys that he has probably spent close to– well, lets just say that if they’re doing it to get through university, by now they should be happily plugging away at PhDs, bless them.
Wei Qing, for all his free love, prefered private chats and good acting. He wanted to feel loved and adored, even if it was only for half an hour. Even if it was always transactional, he wanted to believe it wasn’t, until he came down and sent them their tip. None of that came cheap, and when he found someone that matched his tastes, he couldn’t help but spend outrageously to lock them down. To feel that they’d pretty much always be available to him. That they wouldn’t disdain him, or think him pathetic, for the way he needed this.
There was Yutao, the pale-skinned and fae-like youth with the cute voice and the positively debauched collection of toys and props, which he’d breathlessly use per Wei Qing’s request. Before he died, Yutao had undoubtedly been his favorite, the one he requested eighty percent of the time, if he was being honest.
He made him feel adored, and powerful. In control. Wanted.
And then…
Then. There was the completely different flavor of Ta Yeh Yeh. Tall. Broad. Cold. Idly amused by every request, spending the whole time stroking himself and giving orders, while listening to Wei Qing coming undone, camera covered but voice always exposing his bliss. Ta Yeh Yeh, laughing at how quickly he’d come. Softly but lovingly teasing him as he spooled up, exploded, unwound.
Wei Qing rarely needed (admitted he wanted) Ta Yeh Yeh’s brand of possession, but when he did- ha.
Nothing else could compare.
After all, he had some internalized trust issues and bad habits. Some belief that even when playing around, he was expected to be on top, and it would be shameful to bottom. Only twice had he trusted and needed someone enough for that level of vulnerability– Gao Zhong, at the start, and Yang Wushe, at the end.
And look how those had turned out.
After all, real sons didn’t let anyone bully them. Real men didn’t need another man to take control, real leaders led everywhere, even in bed. If he was the one to give in, then wasn’t he just proving everyone right about him? Only when he was dumb and innocent, or debauched but delusionally dependent, could he overcome these fears.
But the heart (and other places) wants what it wants. The safe anonymity of Ta Yeh Yeh was the answer to this stalemate. This unanswered need to be exposed; this itch scratched without exposing anything at all. And given the mood he’s been in since rebirth, and the source of his problems right now…
He connects to Ta Yeh Yeh’s channel without a second thought. Not broadcasting, but based on their prior good relationship–
Sure enough, there’s a ping three minutes later.
TYY: Look who it is. Baobei, are you being naughty before bed?
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
QQB: If I am, is there a punishment~?
TYY: Of course there is. How long does baobei need it?
QQB: Ten minutes would be generous.
TYY: I’m out– does baobei want it quick in the bathroom of this club, or can he wait forty-five minutes for something less dirty when I get home?
QQB: Dirty works.
QQB: Really, really works.
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“Leave- leave the tie on, please? Leave on everything-?” Wei Qing’s breathless voice exposes his state as much as the request does.
“Baobei, is that what you’re thinking about? Being here? Getting pinned to the wall, fucked so hard-” Wei Qing whines, as Ta Yeh Yeh pops his zipper and fishes out his cock, “-used so quickly that I don’t even need to undress? Am I just going to use your lovely body, see if you’re good enough to please me in between songs?”
Wei Qing nods, even though TYY can’t see it, and grips himself unprompted. That dark chuckle is so dangerous.
“Baobei is forgetting how this works.”
Wei Qing blushes, strokes faster, whines more prettily, as Ta Yeh Yeh makes him speak, makes him beg and whine and promise to be a good boy, even on this bathroom floor, if only it will please Ta Yeh Yeh. Screws his eyes shut, forces them open, as he needs to see the languid evaluation of Ta Yeh Yeh’s broad, tanned hand, only to become overwhelmed and need to block it out.
He says all the things that are normally only whispered into his ear, makes all the debauched promises that they know he won’t keep, arches off the bed when he hears and sees and imagines that he can feel Ta Yeh Yeh’s pleasure building at his servitude.
Taboo, boundary-crossing, someone strong and indifferent reacting because of him. Just him.
It’s what Wei Qing wants, exactly what he wants, to make someone immovable move and thrust and come because of the things he is saying and doing. Wei Qing wants to be what they are willing to throw away all their refinement because of.
He bucks off the bed, the poor bath towel barely saving his (new) duvet from being soiled by the joy that flows through him. Shivers and pants and finds his eyelids growing heavy, even as he forces himself to keep watching, wanting and needing for Ta Yeh Yeh to come as well.
To prove he’s desirable, even if it’s all pretend, to show that he can bring pleasure, even if it’s accompanied by a bank transfer. Ta Yeh Yeh doesn’t disappoint him.
“Good, perfect, those little mewls– baobei sounds so pretty that he makes me want to gather him up and start round two in a private booth. Reward him for being so good and ready, fill him with rewards for how well he takes me.”
The phone tilts as Ta Yeh Yeh comes and they close out the transaction, TYY doling out doting praise and dark promise as Wei Qing feels the contentment of being spent unwind his gut and finally, relax his muscles. Blissed out and two minutes away from the dreamless sleep he so wants, he tips 6666 yuan– and is rewarded almost instantly with a lovely video of the moment TYY comes, looping in the client like all that praise had moments before.
TYY: Baobei is being too generous again, I’ll have to slowly pamper him next time.
QQB: Hold it in, hold it in, if I get hard again I’ll never sleeeeeep
TYY: Then sleep, baobei.
So he does.
—
While Wei Qing has accomplished his mission of dreamlessness, he’s unknowingly had the opposite effect on Yue Fei. No, he’s not Ta Yeh Yeh. That would be insane and damaged. Also, logistically complex. But…
Yue Fei knows about the account, naturally.
He’d researched both the twink and the daddy, when Wei Qing first started spending stupid amounts of money on them. After all, he kept track of all of Wei Qing’s bills, and the transfers seemed like more than just Wei Qing’s tendency to download a mobile game, whale around everywhere, and then grow bored of it. He’d seen the repeated names and checked their streams and known to investigate, a lifetime ago. Yue Fei made sure they were safe and professional and that Wei Qing was not foolish enough to expose himself during their dates. What he found was…
Not to his tastes?
But also not unacceptable. Wei Qing was young, and virile, and had poor impulse control. Especially when he was under the influence of substances or his own horniness. Transactional, virtual contact was very safe, compared to all the rest of it. And the men Wei Qing had chosen were not bad– were better than his actual partners, in fact.
Sure, the perpetually collegiate twink was actually older than Wei Qing by almost a decade, maybe asexual, and for sure more interested in finally getting his food influencer blog to take off than getting off with his clients, but he’d never been in trouble with the law, nor the source of any rumors against those on his streams.
And Wei Qing’s daddy? Well, he was actually more or less what he said on the tin, but thankfully, lived at the other end of the country and thus was unlikely to recognize Wei Qing’s voice someday across a boardroom table. In his last life, Yue Fei had actually tried to arrange a meet-cute between the two of them.
After all, Wei Qing had been spiraling– choosing Yang Wushe.
If he really needed that level of control… Yue Fei would rather entrust him to the camboy than that wolf at the door. At least the streamer was using him up front, for cash, and respected him as a patron. It was mutual and above-board. Wang Yushe was just fucking him while thinking of someone else– two someone elses. The white moonlight he’d been missing, and the business rival he wanted to humiliate and burn. The better choice was obvious and Yue Fei had been willing to add ‘procuress’ to his list of talents.
It hadn’t worked out– TYY had been willing to meet, but not willing to lie about it being deliberate. Before Yue Fei had figured out how to persuade him that he’d be lying for the greater good, Wei Qing was dead, and it no longer mattered.
None of that matters now, of course. It was a long time ago; hadn’t happened yet. Wouldn’t happen, maybe, this time.
Yue Fei takes a shower.
He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop.
He’d just been worried, about the bath and then the silence, had wanted to check to make sure that Wei Qing wasn’t feverish, that the injury wasn’t somehow worse, even though he knows he checked it properly. Knew he was trained for it.
So he’d planned to collect the glass of water and take Wei Qing’s temperature and maybe get a lavender compress for his eyes and temples, since he suddenly seemed enamored with the scent. And since Wei Qing had been so oddly well-behaved, and had no guests, he’d been more unaware than normal, approaching the door-
And then he’d heard it.
Heard the sound of sliding fabric, the creaks of the headboard that Wei Qing kept loose on purpose, because he liked the sound of it banging. Heard those little noises that Wei Qing was making, and the faint sound of a deep, laughing voice through tinny speakers. Heard the praise and begging coming from his lips, all those promises, easily given.
He’d left as soon as he put two and two together, of course.
He wasn’t some pervert, nor was he a prude. If Wei Qing could restrain himself to those two for his flings, and someone real and worthy for his long-term entanglements, that would be best. It’s not like he expected Wei Qing to take the cloth, no matter what silly things he’d promised about ‘never again.’ It’s just-
Yue Fei sighs and looks down at his own dick, unimpressed.
He doesn’t think he’s attracted to Mr. Phone Daddy, but maybe he’s mistaken? After all, what else could possibly be going on? It’s not like he’d ever think of making Wei Qing make those sounds! His purpose in getting Wei Qing away from random cocks was not to sink him onto his.
It absolutely was not.
He just wants to protect him, and if he can’t do that, walk away. That’s all, there was nothing beneath it. Probably, he was just turned on by the victory of having Wei Qing stay in even when horny and looking for action. This is just some strange trauma-response to Wei Qing’s libido (for once) not sending him running towards danger. Probably just that.
(He still ends up having a very disgruntled wank).
It’s a coincidence that the shower gel is lavender scented. He got the same gift basket.
That’s it.
—
Thank goodness for work.
Even in a mostly-dead R&D department, you could absolutely bury yourself in data and meetings and vague plans for the future, if you woke up imagining the same words as the night before, said by a different man, with an even colder air. You could read and study and make calendars and not at all think about just how deep you are, or how high your water bill will be next month if you keep having to try to join the mermaid clan to avoid jumping your assistant.
And if you were an emotionally-exhausted assistant left baffled by an ill-considered bout in the shower, and the strange, labyrinthian dreams that followed– well, you could absolutely organize all the files and begin auditing all the records and even rehome a nest of lizards that have somehow made it into your office on the seventeenth floor. You could neatly sidestep all the strange decisions you were making, and what kind of meaning they might have, fully devoting yourself instead to cold facts and figures.
Yes, work really is a blessing.
After all, it can be hard to get perspective, when you live in the same apartment, just the two of you. No matter how big it is, there’s something inherently intimate about the setup. Which is fine, except for when your brain misconstrues closeness as desire and you start dreaming about things you really shouldn’t. With people that you absolutely can’t touch.
….
Lizards safely escorted to a nearby pocket park, Yue Fei detours. Past the seventeenth. Up to the top floor, number twenty-eight. Where Wei Qiwan was no doubt holding court. How strange it will be, to see him again. To see those tells of his, which had once made Yue Fei so furious.
But he now understood, even as he regretted…
Somehow, he doubts this meeting will be pleasant. But it’s still safer than going back downstairs with his mind this chaotic. And anyway… Protecting Wei Qing is still his job, for now. He shouldn’t just do the enjoyable parts of it, he should use this time to make harder choices as well. Otherwise, isn’t it just taking advantage? Wei Qing isn’t the only person he should bully into better choices, with this second chance of his. Yes. After weeks of careful consideration, Yue Fei is sure that he and Wei Qiwan were not correct, in how they once acted. Part of protecting Wei Qing is… probably to insulate him from his brother’s misguided attempts at protection. Or better yet, stop them altogether and call an end to this farce of an estrangement.
If only he can figure out how to explain it, without Wei Qiwan mistakenly targeting him.
This pair of brothers really made one earn their salary.
Subordinate abuse is what it is.
Author’s Corner:
I’ll admit, I’m nervous that this chapter comes so early, I imagine there are some readers who are mad at Wei Qing. Or maybe me? 
For those who might be turned off by this perceived fickleness, here is my reasoning:
Wei Qing is the titular fuckup. The chance that he will come back to life and immediately live on the straight and narrow– just like Yue Fei, to this, I can only say ‘Heh.’ At the current moment, Wei Qing’s love for Yue Fei is this very abstract, aspirational thing. The idea that he might actually have a shot is– totally not on his radar (or Yue Fei’s). Wei Qing is being a good boy within his paradigm, which boils down to: Not sleeping with anyone, not going clubbing, and not crossing boundaries by doing things like masturbating to his crush when he has no indication that Yue Fei would be okay with such things.
Whether his idea of goodness is right or wrong, I can’t say. I can only promise that this is a 1v1 HE story, and the lovely TYY is just passing scenery, and maybe a nudge that helps certain people realize some things.
(Also, you might notice that YFF’s compass is a little different, heh. I wonder what he was thinking of…)
Thanks for the chapter~
Wow, author-san I think I love you ❤
This ch was so hot~~ I can visualize WQ perfectly begging for Daddy
TYY is so OMG (Im steaming~~)
That being said, WQ does sound like a sub in need of a dom, something I don’t think YF is into, unfortunately. WQ personality is just like a needy sub searching for someone to control him, praise him, watch him, earger to receive praise, such a (trying to be a) good boy~~
Author-san, your IP is a good one and I look foward for more, love so much the way you write~~
Right~? He is a total sub that craves for a dom
Yes, I imagine Yue Fei had absolutely no desire to dominate Wei Qing, to make him beg and whine and cry for his permission only… uh-huh, sure YF doesn’t. 🙂 Thanks for the chapter!
It did feel weirdly unfaithful, but of course it wasn’t (any more than my 2D Wang Ye/ikeman photo gallery right?). It also wasn’t Wei Qing trying to lose himself, just trying to sleep. If Yue Fei wasn’t hurt by it, then I’m not either 😄.
I get it. The feeling that our mc should only feel desire for the ml. But that camboy was obviously mc’s substitute for yue fei. Tho I can’t stop thinking abt how that meet cute could’ve went if it happened 😅
Haha there might be a bathroom involved 🤭
🤭x2
Sure Yue Fei, keep denying 🙂
TYY may be passing scenery but I already like the guy. He sounds nice. In a totally innocent way. : )
Actually it’s all perfectly fine. Life is never narrow or black and white. i am happy he is not going out and screwing around, but online, heck yeah. Live a little.Thank you .😚
That was too hot for me to be angry, about anything.
I’m cheering for the maybe asexual food blogger lmao
The word as*xual needs to be checked? 🙁
Nah this is perfectly fine (and also absolutely steaming hehe), they’re not in a relationship and professionals gonna pro. If he’d pulled up his fav porn vids instead it’d be about the same difference, but the praise kink craving makes way more sense.
I absolutely lost my sh*t at “disgruntled wank”.
100/10 for both the original author and the translator. Humor has got to be one of the hardest things to convey, and this work has been absolutely outstanding from the very start. 🥰