My memory ended with a roadway full with flashing red lights and sirens.
I passed out on the helicopter due to a high fever and loss of strength, and was subsequently woken by discomfort of the wounds in my palm that was being dealt with.
When I awoke, all I could think of was Qi Shu’s fleeting glance at me and his silhouette, which had vanished into the ruins to save me.
I snatched Zhou Chen’s arm and cried out, asking him where Qi Shu was. Where had Qi Shu gone…?
He told me not to be afraid, that Qi Shu was being rescued.
The wounds were excruciatingly painful; the nerves of the fingertips were linked to the heart, and even a light touch made me sweat bitterly, and tears couldn’t stop flowing.
The doctor stated the silver lining was that I didn’t break any bones and would be able to play the cello again once my skin healed.
I didn’t care about my hands; all I wanted to know was how Qi Shu was doing.
Zhou Chen was obstinate, but he eventually admitted the truth. My heart gradually sank into the ice cave as I watched his lips open and close.
Shattered ribs, severe internal bleeding, head trauma, back burns, a broken limb… There wasn’t a single portion of his body that wasn’t broken.
When I heard that, I had trouble breathing and couldn’t even exhale.
I just hurt my hand so hard. Qi Shu, how painful should his be…
Qi Shu was placed into the ICU after the operation, which lasted a full twenty hours.
He was severely injured; his entire body was encased in different tubes, and his chest hardly moved.
I couldn’t go into the ward, so I had to make do with reclining on the glass pane outside and watching him.
When his eyes were closed, he appeared quite serene; despite his worn appearance, his brows and eyes were still arrogant.
He should always be having a good time out there, always be proud of himself, and always be reckless.
He shouldn’t be laying here.
I did this to him.
“Will he be all right?” I asked, choking.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
Zhou Chen stood behind me in silence. After a while, he asked me, “If so, what are you going to do?”
I have no idea.
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Really..? However, he looks like he’d break with just one touch.
Qi Shu was out of danger 48 hours later and was moved to the general ward. It took another three days for him to finally open his eyes.
When I walked in, the doctor was inspecting him, and when he spotted me, he smiled over his shoulder and said, “Xiao Yu.”
His face was pale, his entire body was lean, his lips were bloodless, and he appeared frail.
The doctor and nurse left the ward after ascertaining that the vital signs were okay. My nose grew sour instinctively as I walked over and sat by the bed.
“Don’t cry,” he said.
I tried to hold back my tears and asked, “Are you okay?”
He shook his head. “Hurts.”
Qi Shu had always had a very privileged lifestyle. Even the smallest bump required a visit to the family doctor. You can image how uncomfortable he feels right now.
“I’m sorry… it’s all my-”
“You mean to me.” He interrupted me softly, “Is sorry the only word you’ll say?”
I choked and didn’t know how to answer.
His attention was drawn to my gauze-wrapped hand. “Is the injury serious?” he said, frowning.
“Nothing serious…”
“When you reached out your hand, I knew things were already difficult for me,” he continued slowly, looking at my face, obviously in poor health, and said, “You value your hand so much, yet you’re willing to protect him.”
Qi Shu was right. I care about my hands very much since it’s only when I take up the bow would I feel appreciated.
“There is one thing I didn’t tell you. In fact, your cooking isn’t tasty.”
He abruptly changed the subject and even chuckled.
“But I always let you cook because I enjoy seeing your soot-stained hands.
“I know Zhou Chen isn’t like me; he’ll love you and make you happy, whereas I’m a jerk who just wants to see you cry.
“You made the right decision to leave me.”
I couldn’t figure out why he was telling me this.
“I’m quite aware that my cooking isn’t particularly delicious. I’m always very sad if you eat very little every time.”
It suddenly felt like a dream now that I was talking about the past.
“I’ve tried several times, but I can’t seem to get it properly. I’m using the same materials and following the same methods, but I simply can’t get it to taste good. ”
“Don’t do anything if you can’t do it well,” he said. “I don’t want you to cook for Zhou Chen. Then I will be the only person in the world who has eaten your food.”
After speaking, he went on to disclaim this sentence, “Forget it… When you like someone, you can’t wait to show them the entire world. It’s because I didn’t grasp it earlier and assumed you didn’t love me enough.
“It’s laughable to think about it now. I thought you liked Wen Yan.
“When I went to fetch him once, I found you standing beneath the tree with him, laughing and talking. Your eyes were sparkling and your cheeks were glowing, and I thought to myself, “I must have this tiny creature,” yet you never gave me that look after I had you.
“I was so jealous that I couldn’t think of anything else to do but torment you to prove that you were mine.”
I was shocked that Qi Shu had such a misunderstanding of me, and remembered that on the day he mentioned, I felt shy and happy because I saw him from a distance.
As for what came after that… I was trying so hard to satisfy him that I couldn’t express myself freely.
It turned out to be wrong from the beginning…
He’d come after me for a platter of fruit. I’d always arrange a platter of lychees for him since I believed he liked Wen Yan’s pheromones.
He’d become enraged whenever I mentioned Wen Yan, most likely because he assumed I wanted to leave him for Wen Yan.
After I transplanted the glands, he bit me so frantically that maybe at some point he really wanted to give me a permanent mark.
I wanted to explain, but nothing came out of my mouth.
It’s already like this, forget it ba.
Qi Shu looked at me with a sad expression.
“I lied a lot to you.
“You’re not attractive, you’re not cute, and you’re not likable enough; these are all lies.
“I’m just afraid of showing weakness.
“In fact, I like roses very much. You’re much better than roses.
“Your love is also very good.
“I had it,” he said flatly, looking up at the ceiling. “That’s why it’s harder for me to give it up.”
He finally appeared fatigued after saying this. His attention was drawn to a spot in the air, and he turned away from me.
After a lengthy period of time, the effects of the medication and the tiredness from the pain led him back to sleep.
Outside, the afternoon sun had faded to a golden darkness. The day had come to an end, and so had the two of us.
This relationship taught me how to love properly, and I hope it did the same for him.
I gently touched the corners of his lips. They were soft.
“Next time you like someone else, don’t be so hard-mouthed.”
“Don’t be afraid to show weakness.”
“Love’s weakness is armor.”
The author has something to say:
Today’s playlist：《Lonely Patients》
[Don’t talk about its silence, we are all happy]
Surnamed Wen isn’t dead yet. How could Cub Qi die
OMG! I did not think I could feel sorry for QS but the author proved me wrong! Respect!
Thanks for the chapters. Happy Holidays!
AMEN.
Now I really feel bad for QS
A misunderstanding led to such a big thing
😢
I personally still don’t feel bad for Qi Shit. Even though it was a misunderstanding, he certainly showed his “love” for Xiao Yu in disgusting ways😒 Even if he was jealous he should have asked ONCE. IF HE ASKED ONCE and TRUSTED Xiao Yu it would’ve been fine. Oh and let’s not forget him showing his “love” in r*ping and hurting Xiao Yu. Now you ask for forgivness? I think not.
Ty for the chapter!!! I bet Zhou Chen is heartbroken rn 🙁 💜💜💜
Not feeling bad for Qi Shu, but it was interesting seeing his point of view. Misunderstanding or not he treated the person he “loved” so horribly and committed so many unforgivable acts agains Xiao Yu. He even killed his unborn child.
So no, I don’t feel bad for him. I’m glad he didn’t die for the MCs sake, but besides that I hope there’s more atonement for him in the future.
I think the same as you.
The auther realy did sucha good job in this story T_T when it said angst, it really gave you angst
Not feeling bad for him😐 even it was misunderstanding but at least you can treat him gently…..if you ever loved him. Thanks for the chapter~
Am happy for both of them, I feel they hv learnt I really like this story it’s so realistic I like the fact that the relationship had to end btw them as something this toxic can’t really continue in actual sense.
I don’t feel bad for him 😒
Same
Oh. I thought he killed himself, so it was an accident. Pew. He’s @ jerk but he should still live and reflect. In the end his love wasn’t strong enough to overcome his pride. That’s why it’s very important to communicate. Can’t believe they spent 4 years with that kind of insecurity both weighing in their minds. No wonder it messed them up.
I’m glad Qi Shu didn’t die. I hope he can change and become a better person, someone capable of loving others.
Seems like your the only sane person here
I don’t feel bad for him like the others here, and sure I don’t want him to die in this way (I want him to die at earlier chapters but I don’t know now, maybe I want him to live his own life… Change and let XY go,) Guess this is the closure, hope he find his own happiness now
If I were in XY’s shoes, I wouldn’t even be sorry for QS at all. QS sacrificing himself for XY is compensation for XY’s near-death experience before. He nearly killed XY; shouldn’t he compensate for it by also experiencing the same?
However, XY’s guilt towards QS is understandable; it’s in line with his character.
Sure, XY learned something from the abuse, but QS still needs therapy. Their previous entanglement isn’t enough to teach the latter ‘how to love properly.’
I dont feel sorry for him. He hurt Xiao Yu emotionally and physically. He love XY but cheated on him and even disgustingly let XY see it.
I knew it!!! I knew there’s a reason behind qi shu’s action
🙄 When that scum was saying those things I was rolling my eyes so hard. I just couldn’t comprehend how someone who had a really hard time to understand his feelings can perfectly understand and convey them so well right now. Wasn’t he complete blockhead? It just doesn’t add up.. but since we’re nearing the end I guess it was necessary. I’m Very satisfied they ended things this way.
Probably because he almost died? Lol. He probably had a taste of afterlife and decided it’s better to start telling Xiao his secrets before the light takes him for good. Hahahaah
ALL OF THIS IS A FREAKING MISUNDERSTANDING AFTERALL? THATS WHY HES ALWAYS MAD WHEN XIAO IS IMMITATING WEN YAN CAUSE HE THOUGHT. O EM FREAKIN G!!
I wnated to continue hating Qi Shu till the end. Why must the author write him like this? 😭 Although I’ve grown a bit soft for him, I still can’t forgive him for Xiao Xiao’s baby and abuse.
Nah, not all characters deserve a second chance and QS doesn’t need a redemption arc imo.
Didn’t even feel bad for him 😂😂