Sand Sculpture Childhood Friends Are the Most LethalChapter 19

Chinese New Year’s eve


X year, 3 February dliKSe

Weather: Hazy

It’s Chinese New Year’s eve tonight. I don’t know what’s going on at Wu Yunfei’s side, but here, almost every relative I greet asks passionately about my marriage situation. 

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(T▽T)I’m only 25 ah! From the way they are asking, why does it feel like I am an old fogey who can’t find a wife at all? 

To restore my inner peace, I hid in an empty room and called the sand sculpture. XdNwi

As the real definition of an old fogey who can’t find a wife, the situation at his side should be a lot worse than me ba?

However, this guy actually hung up my call and video-called me a second later.

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

P jcrkfgfv atf mjii jcv mbeivc’a tfiq yea ijeut ja tlr beaola. 

“Qts jgf sbe vgfrrfv ilxf atja? Rfk ojrtlbc agfcv?” P jrxfv.

uN2Ph0

I’m already used to that guy always wearing unique and different clothes, but after knowing him for so long, this was the first time I saw him wearing a military overcoat, topped with a Lei Feng hat.

“Zs wew kjr jogjlv P kbeiv yf mbiv, rb rtf rqfmljiis obecv wf j mbaabc-qjvvfv pjmxfa.” Lf tjv jc fzqgfrrlbc oeii bo fzjrqfgjalbc jcv rffwfv ab olcv tlr beaola nfgs ecrjalrojmabgs.

I laughed even harder and hurriedly screenshotted this ‘beautiful’ image of him in the military overcoat. But thinking of it, why is he running around and hanging outside on the eve of Chinese New Year instead of having his reunion dinner with his family at home? 

“I’m going to hang out with you ah,” he said seriously, “asking you out to light firecrackers.” QHZBGi

“Stop bullshitting! The entire of Beijing prohibits lighting firecrackers now, there aren’t even any places selling them, how do you even find one to light?” I laughed. 

“The recluse naturally has a brilliant plan, I’ve prepared smokeless firecrackers.” 

“What the heck are smokeless firecrackers!”

“Come out and see!” LPsqbp

Even if it’s pitch dark outside, I could still tell where he is by the blurry background scenery behind him. If I guessed correctly, he should be just downstairs.

I opened my curtains and peered down. As expected, that guy donning a huge military overcoat with his Lei Feng hat stood there.

He saw me and excitedly waved at me, looking a little foolish.

Now that I think about it, that guy had been like this since we were young, always dragging over a whole box of firecrackers on a tiny cart to play with me. Even though he was a lot older than me, he was still a little scaredy-cat. Every time we played with firecrackers, he would always make me cover my ears and stand very far away, but he himself kept shivering and couldn’t even light up the firecrackers at all.  OTHqXU

There was even once when he finished using an entire box of matchsticks and still couldn’t manage to light the firecrackers. In comparison, I was much more courageous at that time, to the point where I feared nothing in Heaven or Earth, I would even hold the firecracker in my hand and only toss it far away just when it was about to blow up.

I always knew my own limits, but that guy always gets scared shitless and he even lied to me, saying that if I kept playing with firecrackers, the gunpowder would eventually enter my body and when the weather becomes hotter, I would explode like those firecrackers. I was quite dumb then, so I wholeheartedly believed his words and hid in an aircon room throughout summer, I didn’t dare to step a foot out into the sun, fearing that I would explode. 

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As expected, that guy got severely punished by his father in the end and he made him swear to never lie to me again. 

“I saw you, don’t move, I’m coming over now.” I said. CrWU1t

Her Excellency my mother saw that I hurriedly wore my jacket and thought that something happened in the company, she came to me with a worried expression.

I told her that it was just Wu Yunfei who came, and I was going out to play with him.

“You two are already so old, why are you still acting like kids who never grew up?” She mocked.

I said this has been a tradition since many many years ago, and according to usual practice, that guy is probably going to ask me for a red packet later.  6psg2w

“It couldn’t be that you guys are still single just to get red packets ba?” Her Excellency my mother teased.

I smiled and remained silent. Although the small sum of money in the red packet seemed a lot when we were younger, the meaning behind giving and receiving it is much more than the usefulness of the money inside. 

And as for why we couldn’t find a partner… for me, it’s simply because I have no time, but for that guy, it’s most probably that his standards are too high ba

If he refuses to lower his standards and still stubbornly tries to find a heavenly maiden, then I reckon he’s really going to be lonely till he’s wrinkly and old.  OLM0zu

Translator's Note

Lei Feng was a soldier in the People’s Liberation Army of China, and following his death, became a cultural icon, portrayed as a model citizen for his selflessness, modesty, and devotion to Chairman Mao. Below is a picture of Lei Feng with his hat.

Translator's Note

usually used by scholar-officials as a form of self-address. WYF is basically using this self address to praise himself for being smart

Translator's Note

pronounced hóngbāo : red envelope embossed with chinese well wishes on it, which contains a sum of money and is usually given to relatives during Chinese New Year or birthdays, as a token of good luck for the rest of the year.

Translator's Note

The receiver of the red packets during Chinese New Year is usually someone younger than the person who gives it, and also has to be unmarried. If one is married, they are the ones to give red packets to unmarried relatives younger than them.

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