An Xie stood up and slapped Ah Jin on the face. Ah Jin’s head turned to the side, his body swaying and almost falling to the ground. An Xie was wearing gauntlets, which left bloody marks on his face, and drops of blood trickled down from the corner of his mouth.
Aghast, everyone lowered their heads.
Cursing the emperor was a capital offense. Even though they were far from the imperial court, if such words spread, it would be enough for Dai Jin to die a thousand deaths. An Xie would also face punishment. If it got serious, it would mean losing his head in the name of disrespecting the Emperor!
Even if An Xie dragged Dai Jin out and gave him dozens of lashes, it would be considered lenient.
Everyone was waiting for the General to punish Dai Jin, but to their surprise, An Xie only scolded, “Roll back to your room!” and there was no further action.
Dai Jin’s cheek was swollen from biting down, and he stiffly cupped his hands in salute to An Xie before striding away in a rage.
Purple with anger, An Xie sat on the chair and yelled at them, “If today’s words spread, I’ll skin you alive, do you understand?!”
“Yes!”
The high-ranking military officers hastily replied in unison.
“Alright, Strategist, tell us about the arrangements for later,” An Xie said.
The elderly strategist, all smiles, stood up and began to speak.
The bunch of officers stared at him with wide eyes: That’s it? You won’t even beat him?!
An Xie stared right back: Beat for what!
The officers: …
Compared to Deputy General Dai Jin, this bunch was beaten at every turn, just like being brought up by a stepmother, ying ying ying…
The matter was left unresolved.
An Xie knew that Ah Jin was particularly concerned about his affairs. He figured Ah Jin probably wouldn’t even have an appetite for dinner tonight because of anger. So he took some food and went to Ah Jin’s door, giving it a knock only to find it unlocked.
An Xie: … So he left the door unlocked for me, just waiting for me to come over to comfort him?
An Xie, feeling amused and helpless, entered. Ah Jin was lying in bed, with only his head sticking out from the covers.
Putting the food on the table, An Xie grabbed a steamed stuffed bun and sat on the edge of the bed, nom-ing away. The bun was specially made by the kitchen, with fresh goat meat supplied from the city. The cook’s skill was undeniable — the bun had thin skin and plenty of filling, with each bite releasing steam and juicy goodness.
The tastiness of the mutton was so tantalizing!
An Xie didn’t speak or try to persuade the person in bed. He simply sat there, smacking his lips and eating the bun, making it sound incredibly appetizing!
A few minutes later, Ah Jin extended his foot and kicked the sonofabitch to the ground!
… …
As the sun set, servants brought in a new brazier, and candles were lit.
An Xie and Ah Jin took off their shoes side by side, sat cross-legged on the edge of the bed and ate buns.
They talked as they ate.
Ah Jin said, “You’re not really stupid. You must understand what I mean. You know better than me whether he has good intentions or not. Why do you still want to lead the troops?”
An Xie made a faint sound in agreement. “I know there’s something fishy about this situation, but this is his kingdom. He might not risk tens of thousands of soldiers and his own border just to kill me. It is only our guess that he wants to kill me. Either there’s no danger or we fight to defeat the enemy; both are equally possible, so I will go.”
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
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“…”
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An Xie bent down and licked the juices off the bun and his hand.
Ah Jin lowered his head and looked at the bun for a while, then asked, “Why?”
Do you have to be so good to him? Do you have to give your entire heart and soul to someone in your life? Even if it’s a bad guy you entrust?
You’re not a fucking saint!
“Not just for him, but more for myself, for you,” An Xie suddenly spoke up.
Ah Jin was taken aback and looked up at him.
An Xie continued, “I’ve thought about it. I’ve never let him down in my life, I have done everything I can. I once swore to treat him well and to protect him for the rest of my life… I can’t back out of the promises I made.”
“But Ah Jin, I owe you.”
“If it’s truly the worst-case scenario and he wants to kill me, then I should feel hatred and unwillingness. If I don’t die, I’ll definitely give up on him completely. And if I die, that’ll be the end of it all…”
An Xie turned his head, his handsome and cheerful face showing a hint of a smile. He raised his hand and gently, very gently, rubbed Ah Jin’s cheek where there was a wound from his own blow.
“So, in the next life, I’ll be good to you.”
To you alone.
Ah Jin’s throat tightened, his nose stinging intensely. He pressed his lips together and hung his head.
An Xie put his hand down and held it under his face.
Those tears dampened his rough palm.
“If I die, you must live well. I’ll wait for you below, wait for several decades until we meet again. By then, no matter what we become, whether human or dog, I’ll closely follow your ass. You won’t be able to drive me away,” An Xie laughed.
He said, “What I didn’t give you in this life, I’ll give you in the next.”
His dry lips kissed the top of Ah Jin’s head.
“Liar… You’re a liar…”
Ah Jin smiled and cried.
Because the person he wanted was finally interested in him, and because once a person dies, who can guarantee a next life?
At night, An Xie didn’t return to his own room.
He wanted to stay.
An Xie didn’t do anything, and neither did Ah Jin.
They hugged each other, Ah Jin moving close to nuzzle into An Xie’s neck to smell it, while An Xie lowered his head and held Ah Jin’s waist, gently kissing his forehead and hair.
What could be more attractive than a night spent as a couple?
They were reluctant to sleep, staying close to each other like this.
But eventually, dawn broke.
An Xie lay on the bed, his arm pillowing the back of his head, while Ah Jin pulled out a small box from under the bed. Sitting down, he skillfully took out the contents. An Xie leaned over to look and found that the box unexpectedly contained sewing supplies.
An Xie raised his body in surprise. “I never knew that you are actually a girl?”
“Go away!” Ah Jin glared at him, lacking any real lethality. “You’ve touched me all over and still don’t know whether I’m a girl or not?”
The tips of his ears were slightly red as he began to clumsily embroider with a needle. Ah Jin was very patient, and though each stitch was slow, they were carefully calculated.
The pattern on top was outlined with golden thread. After peering at it for a long time, An Xie realized it must be a pair of mandarin ducks.
Ah Jin said, “Here, everyone who is engaged to be married must embroider. Women embroider for men, one for each of them. Hanging this around the waist and walking together shows that we’re a pair.”
Ah Jin’s expression was very gentle, his face still flushed. Normally, his hands were used to holding a knife, so he wasn’t skilled at this kind of work. He got pricked a few times, but he didn’t mind. Carefully, he used another thread to hook the golden thread and weaved it inside, forming the pair of mandarin ducks.
We can’t wear it outside even if it’s embroidered.
An Xie opened his mouth but didn’t say these words. He was afraid that if he said it, Ah Jin would kick him away.
Three more days passed like this.
Then came the messenger with the Emperor’s decree.
The decree was a denouncement, reprimanding why he hadn’t set out to destroy the enemy yet and questioning whether he harbored disloyalty.
The harsh words inside reminded An Xie of the way An Chengjing looked at him as he turned to leave the main hall during their last parting.
Fear, unease, and avoidance…
An Xie knelt on the ground with the other high-ranking military officers to receive the decree, expressing they would set off immediately. The messenger nodded with a sneer, turned to get on the horse without stopping, and left without giving them a chance to pry for information.
However, good news arrived as well—the supply convoy was on its way and would soon arrive.
An Xie sat at a low table, the decree tossed at his feet. The others saw this and dared not lift their heads.
“Strategist, tell me. With the supplies almost here, what are the odds that the person up there wants to kill me?” An Xie asked without scruples in front of everyone.
The strategist thought for a moment and replied, “Thirty percent.”
With the supplies arriving, their chances of winning would increase significantly. If the Emperor truly wanted to kill them, sending supplies would be completely unnecessary.
Thirty percent, quite low.
An Xie swept his eyes over the seated officers and at Ah Jin’s face, then said in a heavy voice, “In that case, tonight, I’ll lead a small team to investigate the truth!”
“Yes!”
The military officers responded in solemn voices.
An Xie then selected a small team and ordered the relevant officers and soldiers to follow the investigation team. The others dispersed, and An Xie turned to speak to the soldier walking beside him.
Ah Jin walked over and stood at a distance, watching him.
An Xie stopped speaking and waved away the subordinate who was listening attentively.
“All right, that’s the plan. You go and adjust your men.”
“Yes.”
The subordinate nodded and quickly ran off to carry out An Xie’s orders.
An Xie sighed and approached Ah Jin, and the two of them walked slowly around the military camp.
Ah Jin lowered his voice and said bluntly, “I’ll go with you tonight.”
“…”
I knew it. An Xie raised an eyebrow, “I’m just leading a team to check if the information is true. We’ll be back early tomorrow morning.”
“No, I’m going,” Ah Jin insisted stubbornly, walking with a stern face and a determined stride.
“You can’t go.”
“I’ll go.”
“Ah Jin, are you looking for a beating?” An Xie’s face showed some anger. “I’m the General, you have to listen to me, do you understand?!”
Ah Jin glanced at him, unfazed.
He could tell at a glance whether An Xie was truly angry or just pretending.
“I see, you’re rebelling against your superior, aren’t you?” An Xie’s expression hardened. He often laughed—warmly, relaxedly, or even joyfully—as if possessing a special ability to make people feel close to him.
But when he stopped smiling, the dignified authority of his noble lineage was immediately apparent.
Anyone else might have felt nervous, but Ah Jin still kept his head down and glanced at An Xie.
“I’m going.”
An Xie: “…”
Gritting his teeth, An Xie looked around to ensure no one was nearby. He then sneered and grabbed Ah Jin, dragging him towards his lodging. An Xie was very strong, and he practically dragged a stumbling Ah Jin along the way.
The door was kicked open and then slammed shut. They bumped into a table, causing the teacups and fruit plates on top to rattle loudly. Finally, Ah Jin was pressed down onto the bed by An Xie.
“Talking back, huh? You insist on going, right?” An Xie said.
Ah Jin swung his fist towards An Xie’s face. An Xie chuckled coldly and easily grabbed his wrist, using his own body and weight to firmly pin Ah Jin on the bed.
“You’re not some old woman, always keeping an eye on an indecisive man and following him wherever he goes. And I'm not your man, fucking telling you if I fart!” An Xie exerted force, and angrily faked a smile.
Ah Jin was even angrier than An Xie, and he retorted, “Aren’t you?”
An Xie froze for a moment, a little unreasonably stubborn.
Translator:
The chapter title is 有一种悲伤 (配这个歌). 有一种悲伤 (A kind of sorrow) is theme song of the movie More Than Blue. Here’s a youtube link with eng subs. I haven’t listened to it but looks like the author thinks it matches this chapter…
