After Future shared his memories of being Jiang Che, no one spoke for a while. Finally, Huo Wuling raised an eyebrow and said with a sarcastic smile.
“So what does this have to do with me?”
He’d already heard about Jiang Che from Ji Ning. When he’d asked Ji Ning to tell him more about himself, Ji Ning had spoken about a childhood friend who died young. At that time, Huo Wuling hadn’t asked carefully about this childhood friend, and had never expected that he’d have any connection with him.
But Huo Wuling just couldn’t identify with the life of ‘Jiang Che’. In his opinion, he was himself, and Jiang Che was Jiang Che. It was like asking someone to take responsibility for their actions in their previous life, how could you when there is no longer any connection between these two separate people?
“So Ji Ning collapsed because you and Jiang Che have the same appearance?”
Herinos asked a question without commenting on the shared memories.
“Yes. I apologise, that was my mistake. I will do my best not to appear in front of Ji Ning again.”
Future bowed his head slightly. He knew that his appearance might have an impact on Ji Ning, so he avoided revealing himself at first. When he showed up outside the gym, he hadn’t expected that Ji Ning’s reaction to Jiang Che would be so strong. Just seeing him had such a big influence.
In fact, even Future found it difficult to understand it himself. Like the other pieces of consciousness, he was also unfamiliar with the concept of ‘Jiang Che’. Even though the influence of ‘Jiang Che’ made his thoughts around Ji Ning different to the others, that didn’t mean he was willing to give up his identity for ‘Jiang Che’.
In essence, ‘Jiang Che’ was just proof of his connection to the pieces of consciousness and an identity he could use to understand Ji Ning more deeply.
“Okay, if we’ve understood why this happened, I will re-simulate the world again.”
Lai smiled and took out his terminal. Because of the fracture just now, the casing of the terminal had been damaged. From the state of it, he predicted that if the world was shattered again, the terminal would be completely destroyed, and it was impossible to say what would happen.
“Teacher has deep feelings for Jiang Che, so it isn’t rational to forcibly hide his memories of Jiang Che. Therefore, I will let the existence of ‘Jiang Che’ reasonably integrate into the simulated world.”
“This time, teacher will remember that Jiang Che is his deceased friend.”
Once he’d finished speaking, Lai threw the terminal into the wall of data. Once again, the simulated world began to run.
“Jiang Che!”
Ji Ning opened his eyes and sat up straight in a cold sweat. He found that he was no longer outside the gym, but lying on a hospital bed with a medical curtain closing him off from the rest of the ward. At the sound of his voice, a figure walked over, their shadow moving across the curtain as they asked, “Are you awake?”
“Yeah.” Ji Ning responded slowly. He swung his legs off the hospital bed and rested his feet on top of his shoes that someone must have taken off him. When he pulled the curtain open, he saw the person standing outside was Herinos, “Professor…”
“If you still feel uncomfortable, you can stay lying down instead of getting up.”
Herinos said kindly. He pushed up his gold rimmed glasses and watched him lie back down before speaking again.
“Do you remember how you got here? You fainted and were taken over by your Junior, but there should be no lasting effects. You need to take good care of yourself, you fainted because of exhaustion.”
“Ah, is that so…”
Ji Ning’s expression was still a little dazed. He had to thank Ark later for bringing him here, but the reason why he passed out was actually because-
“Jiang Che…”
He suddenly recalled the person he’d seen before fainting. It was definitely Jiang Che’s face, there was no way he’d mistaken it.
But Jiang Che was gone, how could he appear in front of him…
Ji Ning sat up abruptly from the hospital bed again. His face was pale but his cheeks were unusually flushed. He had a slightly lost and confused expression on his face as he stumbled out of bed with bare feet.
“Don’t move, where are you trying to go?”
Seeing that he wasn’t even wearing shoes to run outside, Herinos quickly held his shoulders to stop him from moving any further.
“I just…saw Jiang Che just now…I…”
Ji Ning’s words were a mess, his body trembling. Herinos froze at his words, his hands tightening suddenly around the boy’s shoulders. A second later, he eased off his strength and patted Ji Ning’s back, speaking in a slow voice, “Relax Ji Ning.”
His voice seemed to contain a strange magic power that really helped Ji Ning to calm down. He slowly changed from frenzied panic to sorrow. With reddened eyes, he sat motionless on the bed for a long time.
It was just his hallucination. He’d mistaken someone else for Jiang Che.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
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Ji Ning looked at the clock behind Herinos. Right now, he should have been sitting in class, but his afternoon class was already nearly over and he wasn’t in the mood to study, so he got out of bed and sat opposite Herinos.
“You say you saw Jiang Che just now?” Herinos asked, “Do you think he really appeared, or did you see a hallucination?”
“It should be…” Ji Ning’s voice seemed to get stuck in his throat. After some difficulty, he answered, “It was a hallucination…I’m feeling weird today.”
In the face of Herinos’ gentleness, he explained the chaos of the last few days, including the suspicion that he’d forgotten a lot of things, the strange deja vu that kept happening, and even the hallucination of Jiang Che he’d had.
“You also say that you’ve been very tired recently.”
Herinos stroked Ji Ning’s forehead softly. His fingers were cold and the cool temperature soothed Ji Ning’s aching head.
“Your physical health can greatly affect your mental state. Take a good rest and see if that helps you to feel calmer.”
“What kind of state and expression did Jiang Che have when you saw him?”
Ji Ning had only seen him for a moment, but it had left a deep impression on him, “He was wearing white clothes. He wasn’t smiling, and he looked at me with a blank expression, which made me feel…very…”
“Very unfamiliar?” Herinos prompted.
“…Yeah.”
Herinos asked again, “The way you saw him was very different to how you remembered him? What kind of person was he like before?”
“…”
Ji Ning didn’t speak for a while. Since Jiang Che died, he’s never wanted to recall the past, but Herinos was his psychological counsellor and he didn’t want to hide anything from him.
“In my memories, Jiang Che always smiled at me.” He said, “Even if he was in a bad mood, he hardly ever showed it to me.”
Jiang Che was very gentle with him. Although he was only a few months older, he always acted like a mature older brother and was endlessly patient with him. No matter how spoiled he acted, Jiange Che was always happy.
But the Jiang Che in his hallucination wasn’t smiling…Ji Ning didn’t know what that meant, but it made him feel very uneasy.
“Don’t feel troubled.” Herinos reassured him, “This is because your subconscious has given Jiang Che a new identity. It knows that he has died.”
“Your brain is conscious that death is a sad thing, so the apparition of your friend had a gloomy atmosphere. This doesn’t represent how you feel, or how he feels, it’s just human thinking.”
Ji Ning didn’t reply. His chest felt very tight and the emotions he usually repressed had begun to stir. However, after listening to Herinos’ explanation, his tightly clenched fists relaxed very slightly, revealing the bloody crescent shapes on his palms.
“Jiang Che is very important to you, right?” Herinos asked.
“He was my best friend.” Ji Ning nodded slightly, “As early as I can remember, the two of us were always together.”
“I have a proposal for you.”
Herinos gave him a deep look.
“Not to forget him, but to give yourself a wider future. You can miss Jiang Che, but you can’t stop your own life for his sake.”
“You should try to meet more people, make new friends, or…”
He suddenly stood up and moved closer. Gently caressing Ji Ning’s face, he spoke in a low voice.
“Fall in love.”
“Professor…”
Ji Ning called out to him, a little overwhelmed. Herinos took off his glasses and met his gaze, slowly leaning toward him. However, at that moment there was a sudden knock on the door, interrupting their conversation.
“Hey professor, hey Ningning.”
The door opened and Huo Wuling stuck his whole upper body through the doorway. Seeing that Ji Ning was awake, he smiled and entered the room. Ying Qianqiu and Qin Ruwang stood behind him.
“Are you alright?”
Huo Wuling glanced casually at Herinos before putting a hand on Ji Ning’s shoulder with a smile, “I heard that you had to go to the school hospital, so because of the deep love shared between roommates, we came to pick you up.”
“Ah, thank you.”
Seeing his three roommates come for him, Ji Ning cheered up a little. After speaking with Herinos, he felt he was in a better state. The panic that threatened to engulf him had faded, so he smiled at Herinos and said, “Thank you professor, I feel much better.”
“…Is that right?” Herinos responded, but he didn’t seem very happy. When his eyes fell on Huo Wuling, his expression obviously flickered a bit.
“What do I need to pay at the window?” Ji Ning asked, “I don’t know what items I’ve used…”
“Don’t worry.”
Herinos regained his gentle expression and smiled at Ji Ning, “You just borrowed the bed for a bit, you don’t need to pay for anything. Remember to have a good rest when you go back.”
“Okay.”
Ji Ning bent over and put on his shoes. He tried to grab his backpack, but Qin Ruwang had already picked it up and refused to hand it back, so he could only follow the three of them out of the university hospital.
“You fainted from exhaustion.” Huo Wuling sighed and looked Ji Ning up and down, “You need to recover properly. Why don’t you come out with me and eat? I’ll treat you.”
“Alright, I want to eat.” Ji Ning nodded, “But there’s no need to treat me.” He turned to look at Qin Ruwang and Ying Qianqiu and asked naturally, “Do you want to come too? Where should we go?”
“…Ningning.” A subtle expression crossed Huo Wuling’s face, “I meant only the two-”
“That sounds good.”
His words were quickly interrupted by Qin Ruwang, “I don’t mind where we go, you can pick.”
Ying Qianqiu nodded, but didn’t speak.
“Then let’s eat hot pot.” Ji Ning laughed, “It would be nice to have hot pot together.”
“Okay.”
Qin Ruwang and Ying Qianqiu both agreed. Huo Wuling was silent for a few seconds before he said, “Alright.”
After dropping their bags back at the dormitory, they left the university. Their university was located in the city centre. It was a pretty good location, there was a commercial street outside that was full of restaurants. Ji Ning led them over to his favourite hot pot restaurant.
He didn’t notice that the three people following him stopped in unison when they saw this hot pot restaurant.
This was because, after receiving Jiang Che’s memories, they knew that this was the hot pot restaurant that Ji Ning and Jiang Che used to go to. The world simulated by Lai and Future had perfectly replicated the store’s appearance.
In fact, it wasn’t just this restaurant. Every building they’d passed, including the university, were replicated from the real world. It was only because they all knew from the memories that Future had shown them that this was one of Jiang Che’s favourite restaurants that they had such complicated feelings.
“Seriously…”
The corners of Huo Wuling’s lips twitched and a gloomy look appeared in his eyes. He followed Ji Ning into the restaurant. Although Qin Ruwang and Ying Qianqiu didn’t say anything, they didn’t look very happy, obviously still affected by the shared memories.
Due to Ji Ning’s modified memories, he didn’t notice their unusual reactions. He thought he’d been here a few times before with them and had no other connection to the restaurant. A strong aroma wafted through the store, which made his mood a little better. He sat down with his three roommates and looked at the menu.
“You’ll want to eat shrimp slips, right?” Ji Ning remembered that this was what Huo Wuling ate every time they had hot pot, so he ticked it off with a pen and asked, “One or two?”
“I don’t want to eat it.” There was no smile on Huo Wuling’s face.
Although he did like the shrimp slips, they were also something Jiang Che liked. The fact that his preferences were identical to Jiang Che’s made him lose his appetite.
“What’s wrong?” Ji Ning looked at him in surprise, “Why don’t you want to eat them today?”
“…It doesn’t matter.”
Facing Ji Ning’s concerned gaze, Huo Wuling quickly calmed his emotions and said with a smile, “I’m not that hungry. Just ordering one is enough, I don’t want to eat too much.”
“Do you not feel well? You should have said so.” Ji Ning put down the pen, “Should we change to a different place?”
“No, I just don’t want to eat seafood anymore. Anything else is fine.”
Huo Wuling smiled and took the menu. After circling a few items, he handed it back, turning his head to watch the white mist rising from the table next to them. He raised his chin, his eyes a little gloomy.
Ji Ning could tell there was something wrong with Huo Wuling but he wasn’t sure whether it was just physical discomfort or not. He was a little worried, but since Huo Wuling had avoided his questions, he didn’t want to cause a scene, so he suppressed his thoughts and planned to speak with Huo Wuling alone when they got back to the dormitory.
After ordering the pot and side dishes, the soup pot with Jiugongge was brought out to them. The spicy aroma soon filled the air. Ji Ning began to dip the mutton into it, but found the other three didn’t seem to be in high spirits.
Didn’t they want to eat Jiugongge…Ji Ning glanced at the bubbling pot in distress. But they definitely liked spicy food. They’d all ordered it before and there had never been any problems.
“Ningning.”
Huo Wuling drank from his iced drink, then asked casually, “When I came to the door of the university hospital, I heard you mention the name ‘Jiang Che.’ Who is that? Why have I never heard of him before?”
Ji Ning went stiff. He didn’t really want to answer the question, but seeing how Qin Ruwang and Ying Qianqiu’s eyes looked over at the same time in interest, he replied, “He’s my childhood friend.”
“You have a good relationship with him?” Huo Wuling asked, “And you also said ‘missing.’ Why do you miss him?”
“He…Something happened to him.” Ji Ning lowered his head, his expression a little dark. He forced himself to smile, “Let’s not talk about him. I really don’t want to talk about it. Let’s eat.”
“You don’t want to talk about it? Why?” Huo Wuling tilted his head. Although he was still smiling, it had turned a little colder. “Since you care about him so much, why don’t you want to talk about him? Are we not qualified to know, or is he so important to you that you don’t want to share any details about him?”
“He’s dead.” Ji Ning dropped his chopsticks. His eyes filled with hurt and anger as he said coldly, “Are you satisfied now?”
He stood up and walked out of the hot pot restaurant. He didn’t want to argue with Huo Wuling because he could see the boy was just in a bad mood, but that didn’t mean he would just accept his aggressiveness. Although Huo Wuling didn’t usually act like this, for some reason, he kept poking at Ji Ning’s old trauma. What the hell was that about, Ji Ning hadn’t provoked him in any way?
Ji Ning ran out of the restaurant. Both Ying Qianqiu and Qin Ruwang wanted to stop him, but Ji Ning ran very quickly into the crowded commercial street. He disappeared into the crowd and into another street without a trace. As he ran randomly, he muted his phone, ignoring any messages.
He really needed somewhere quiet.
After walking for a long time, Ji Ning suddenly noticed there seemed to be some kind of commotion around him. There was a large crowd of people, looking down at their phones periodically and whispering to each other. The group was mainly young girls, anxious and excited, jumping up to check around them as more and more people gathered on the street.
“I heard that Gu Chen is here, is it true?”
“It’s true, someone saw him just now, but I don’t know where he’s gone!”
Listening in to other people’s conversations, Ji Ning learned that Gu Chen had been spotted nearby. He was a little surprised, but felt an unexpected curiosity and yearning rise up in himself. However, although he waited, Gu Chen didn’t show up again. Maybe he didn’t want to be found. Ji Ning didn’t think there was any use in going to find him anyway, such a big star must have long forgotten about his Junior.
It was a bit cold and Ji Ning didn’t have many clothes on. He hadn’t eaten and he was getting cold, so he went inside a tea shop to buy a cup of warm milk tea.
As soon as he entered the shop, the pendant on his phone fell off. It rolled its way over to a corner and stopped in front of someone’s feet.
Ji Ning hadn’t even noticed that person when he first walked in, but they suddenly leaned over and stretched out a slender and beautiful hand to pick up the pendant and give it back to Ji Ning.
Even though they were inside, this person hadn’t taken off their wide pair of sunglasses, but it was impossible to hide how good looking they were. Ji Ning recognised who he was in an instant. His eyes opened wide in surprise as he murmured without thinking.
“Gu…”
“Shhh.”
The young man raised his index finger in a silent gesture. He smiled at Ji Ning and said softly, “Give me your hand.”
Ji Ning showed him his hand in a daze. The man lightly held his wrist and pressed his fingers flat, exposing his palm so he could place the pendant into his hand.
“Long time no see.” The man winked, “Junior Ji Ning.”
I think this is a really interesting take on the ‘many split consciousness become one ML’ trope because I can’t think of another novel where the fragments are so bothered by the idea of losing their individuality or by the fact that their unique experiences would be lost if they merged back into one.
When I first read this novel I thought it was just the same old QT…I never expected this kind of twist. I haven’t even read that many QT novels but still it’s the most impressive one by far. The author’s skill in crafting believable characters and immersive settings is commendable for sure. tbh I never thought I would be this engrossed, it’s definitely gonna leave a lasting impression on me. Kudos to the translator san for delivering this superb novel to us~ I really wanted to say all this for a long time. Sending virtual hug>>>>✨
Thank you so much for this comment, I’m so happy you’ve enjoyed it so much! I must have read hundreds of QT, but this novel is one of my favourites for all the reasons you’ve mentioned above. I just love the characters so much, there isn’t a single protagonist I wouldn’t be happy to read a whole novel about, I think the author writes them really well!! Thank you for your kind words to me as well, I will do my best to translate the rest of the novel well <33!
Tbh I have always found the merging trope creepy. I like that this novel is addressing it’s questionable aspects.
I think my author’s done such a good job considering this within this arc – the next few chapters are filled with so much emotion, it’s quite beautiful
I was ROBBED of Yin Qianqiu scenes! ROBBED I SAY!!
Anyway though, I really also liked how the author did this trope! It’s really interesting and doesn’t have the same old script other novels have!
He’s so cute, isn’t he? Don’t worry, his scenes aren’t quite over yet!!
This is the reason I loved this novel so much, the way my author writes is so emotional and considered, I hope you enjoy this arc!!
I’m so happy I love this super rare QT trope hehe 😍 the only other one I’ve read is Need to Propose to 7 Men which has sorta the same thing but tbh the explanation twist is even more wild kek, and also the sequel spin off to it. I would very much rec hehe
But anyway kyaaa I camp and now I shall binge again
*I rely on kisses to clear survival games” also has a similar trope
I think that’s also written by the author of this book!
Game Loading also feels similar! From the same author as 7 men. But seriously……..I Rely on Kisses will always be peak shard disgust haha
I was thinking this because I have multiple personalities myself… But I was hoping it would be less traumatic to me… Wah, I was so wrong… This hits hard because 2-3 of my personalities are admittedly patterned after a dead sibling… Some alters “know” they’re fragments of a previous original while others insist they aren’t… Ugh maybe I need to get back to therapy
Herinos: I have a proposal for you
Me: oh? ah wait, not that kind of proposal :/ (as his therapist, those moves are ILLEGAL sir)
Gu Chen has actually returned! This must be totally wild for him. Last he knew he was marrying his rather insane brother-but-not-brother-and-also-emporer?! 😶