Perhaps Zhou Rin noticed the strange expression on Ji Ning’s face, because he quickly smiled and said, “To be more precise, it’s the song I requested for you on behalf of Jiang Che.”
He paused, then said, “I have a certain relationship with him, so I’ve known about you for a long time, but I don’t think you know me.”
“Ah…”
Ji Ning finally came to his senses, a dazed expression on his face.
It turned out Mr. Zou Rin was someone Jiang Che knew. No wonder he knew that unusual song. But he’d never heard Jiang Che mention Mr. Zhou before, so he didn’t know what kind of relationship the two of them had.
At the same time, he felt a little ashamed. Because he’d received so many confessions the last two days, his mentality had become a little strange, and he actually thought that Zhou Rin had taken a fancy to him and wanted to keep him as a lover. Considering the status Zhou Rin had, what beauty could he not seduce? There was no reason for him to be interested in Ji Ning.
“‘Love’ was Jiang Che’s favourite song.” Zhou Rin continued.
“Yes.”
Ji Ning nodded, feeling more curious about the relationship between Zhou Rin and Jiang Che. The fact that he knew Jiang Che’s favourite song meant that they not only knew each other, they also had a close relationship. But even though he was Jiang Che’s best friend, he’d never known about Zhou Rin’s existence.
He smiled at Zhou Rin again and said, “It turns out that Mr. Zhou was Jiang Che’s friend. I’m glad that I was able to meet you today.”
Zhou Rin nodded in agreement, “Do you know why I requested this song for him?”
Ji Ning couldn’t answer him immediately. He’d assumed it was simply because Zhou Rin missed Jiang Che.
“It’s because he loved you.”
Zhou Rin looked Ji Ning in the eyes and said in a low voice, “Did you know, Ji Ning? Jiang Che loved you.”
“…”
Ji Ning couldn’t breathe for a moment.
Jiang Che loved him?
How could that be?
He felt like a huge stone had dropped on his head. His first thought was that Zhou Rin was lying, because the idea was so ridiculous. It was like being told he and Jiang Che were actually biological brothers.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
But that didn’t make sense. Why would Mr. Zhou lie to him, what would be the point? It was clear from the man’s expression that he wasn’t ridiculing him, and he seemed to really believe what he was saying.
Glv tf tjnf atf kgbcu qfgrbc? Ktlr kjr Al Rlcu’r cfza atbeuta. Zjsyf Aljcu Jtf ilxfv rbwfbcf firf jcv Zg. Itbe tjv wlrajxfc tlw.
Dea atlr vlvc’a wjxf rfcrf flatfg. Lf jcv Aljcu Jtf kfgf lcrfqjgjyif obg rb wjcs sfjgr yea tf’v cfnfg abiv tlw tf ibnfv jcsbcf, rb tbk kbeiv Zg. Itbe xcbk?
Zhou Rin silently watched his expressions change, then asked abruptly, “You didn’t know?”
“No…” Ji Ning shook his head, his face blank.
“I’m sorry. I think I’ve said something I shouldn’t have.”
Zhou Rin walked to the sink and washed his hands. He said casually, “I might have remembered it wrong. I’m sorry for bothering you, let’s go back.”
Ji Ning nodded mechanically and followed Zhou Rin back to the table. He didn’t speak much for the rest of the meal, his expression distracted and his head heavy with thoughts.
Zhou Rin drank from his wine glass and chatted with the two teachers, but his eyes never strayed far from Ji Ning. Watching Ji Ning’s complicated expressions, he took another sip of wine and sighed softly.
He knew that he represented Jiang Che’s contradictory emotions.
On one hand, Jiang Che wanted to confess his love to Ji Ning, but on the other hand, due to various factors, he’d always held himself back. These opposing thoughts were reflected in his consciousness and led to the creation of him and his ‘older brother’, ‘Zhou Rin’ and ‘Zhou Cun’.
He represented Jiang Che’s fears, while his ‘older brother’ Zhou Cun represented Jiang Che’s fantasies. In his imagination, Ji Ning responded to his feelings, and the two of them were in sweet love. But this was just his delusion. The real Jiang Che, Zhou Rin, was still in a one sided, secret love.
His ‘brother’ wasn’t part of Jiang Che’s consciousness, just created from data. The only real consciousness that existed was him, only ‘Zhou Rin’.
Therefore, in his world, he was in the same situation as Jiang Che, unable to express the emotions in his heart and not daring to. Trapped in his painful dilemma, it wasn’t until he saw Ji Ning once again that he couldn’t bear it any longer and poured out his love.
If he was the fear in Jiang Che’s heart, then he didn’t want to hide his love anymore.
Compared with the other protagonists, who resisted the idea of Jiang Che, he was willing to accept Jiang Che’s identity. If he could truly become ‘Jiang Che’, then in the future, whether their relationship became sweet or painful, it would belong to him alone.
Now, he wanted to make Ji Ning aware of ‘Jiang Che’s’ love for him.
After dinner, everyone formally said goodbye. The two professors drove home, while the three students planned to go back to university together. Zhou Rin stood behind, watching their backs, when he suddenly called out, “Ji Ning.”
“Mr. Zhou?”
Ji Ning turned to see Zhou Rin beckoning to him. He let the other two go first, wondering if Zhou Rin wanted to talk about Jiang Che again.
When he reached Zhou Rin, he asked, “Did you want to talk for longer?”
“You left something behind.”
Zhou Rin took out a wrapped gift from his briefcase and handed it to Ji Ning, “It’s the CD of ‘Love’.”
“Do you want me to pass it on to Professor Li?” Ji Ning asked. He remembered that Zhou Rin had offered the professor the CD during dinner.
“I’ll give him one another time.” Zhou Rin shook his head and smiled, “This one’s for you. You can listen to it when you have time.”
Ji Ning was surprised. He wanted to decline, but when he thought about Zhou Rin’s previous words, he changed his mind and accepted the CD, saying, “Thank you Mr. Zhou.”
“And also…”
Zhou Rin suddenly leaned closer and placed a light kiss to Ji Ning’s cheek. He said softly, “Okay, I’ll leave this to you. You can go back now.”
Ji Ning’s eyes widened, his face bewildered. Zhou Rin ruffled his hair and said, “Don’t worry about it. It’s just a parting kiss.”
“Goodbye Ji Ning.”
After saying goodbye to Ji Ning, Zhou Rin watched his figure disappear into the crowd, then he turned around and walked in the opposite direction. The light around him faded as he gradually left the virtual world and appeared in front of Future.
Future received his memoires. He paused for a while, then asked, “You didn’t tell him how you feel about him?”
“I already told him.”
Zhou Rin smiled slightly.
“I told him that Jiang Che loved him.”
“And I’m also ‘Jiang Che’, aren’t I?”
Ji Ning returned to the dormitory with the CD, turned on his laptop and put it into the CD drive. He connected his headphones and listened to the music on the CD.
A sweet female voice sang softly into his ears. He listened to the song over and over again. Even when he went to bed, the music seemed to still be echoing in his ears.
He dreamed of Jiang Che again. Inside a sun drenched room, Jiang Che reclined on an armchair that was sat next to a floor to ceiling window. Speakers in the room played a pretty melody. Jiang Che slowly tapped out the rhythm with his fingers, closing his eyes to quietly appreciate the song.
Inside the dream, Ji Ning pushed open the door to the room and entered. His movements were very soft, but Jiang Che immediately noticed his arrival and opened his eyes. He waved him forward with a smile on his lips, “Come and listen to this song with me.”
He moved to one side of the armchair and Ji Ning sat down on the other. Jiang Che leaned his head on his shoulder. When Ji Ning complained he was too heavy, Jiang Che laughed, but instead of moving away he leaned even more of his body onto Ji Ning, using him as a pillow.
“Who sang this? What’s it called?”
Ji Ning tried to push him off, but quickly gave up and asked about the song casually.
“It’s not a popular singer, you won’t have heard them before. As for the name of the song…”
Jiang Che pressed his face into Ji Ning’s shoulder, looking up at him. Ji Ning happened to glance down at him, and their eyes met.
At that moment, Ji Ning felt that the light that shone in Jiang Che’s eyes was extremely bright.
“It’s ‘Love’.”
He heard Jiang Che say softly.
Ji Ning woke up from his dream.
This time he didn’t cry, but his chest still ached with pain. His heart seemed to be beating harshly against his ribcage.
A quiet noise to the left of him attracted his attention, so he moved to the edge of the bed to look down. It was Qin Ruwang, packing a bag. He lowered his voice and asked softly, “Are you going home?”
Qin Ruwang lived nearby and his family conditions were good. He wasn’t far from the university, but he still chose to live inside the university accommodation.
“Yes.” Qin Ruwang answered, looking up at Ji Ning, “Would you like to come to breakfast with me?”
Today was Saturday and Ji Ning hadn’t set an alarm because he wanted to sleep in, but he still felt unusually awake. Many things that had happened over the past few days were weighing on his heart, which stopped him from feeling sleepy.
It had been nice walking with Qin Ruwang the other day. Ji Ning remembered how much watching the sunrise with Qin Ruwang had helped him, so he nodded quickly and said, “Okay, just wait for me. I’ll come down with you in a bit.”
I can’t believe Zhou Rin never gave himself a chance to be with Ji Ning until the end. This was such a sad ending for him – he knew that he would never be able to love Ji Ning as ‘Zhou Rin’, so he was willing to give himself up just for the chance that he could love him as ‘Jiang Che’. My poor Alpha, you were pitiful until the end (つ﹏⊂)
I must check out the author’s other works, this writing is too good! 😭😭
Finding out about what each person represents about Jiang Che is heart wrenching! It’s tearing me apart!
It was a lot of fun!! A similar concept to IFTRA, but the ml is a lot darker then Ji Ning’s little cuties~ I love horror novels, but while this one isn’t so scary, it can get pretty gory, so be warned!
It hurts to read, but I’ve really loved this method of combining mls, as instead of feeling that I’m losing them, it’s more like I understand each of them better…no, I was wrong, it’s just tragic (╥﹏╥)
Oh oh! I’ve also read this one before, didn’t realize they were from the same author!
And yes, it was a painful read! I felt so bad for the ML in the school arc! 😭
my author loves abusing her ml’s – definitely a trembling S writer
That was the same author?? That makes so much sense! I really enjoyed that one but I think I like this one better.
Damn when Future asked Zhou Rin why didn’t you say you loved him and he said I already did. That part really got me.
I do really love that Jiang Che never got a chance to confess but is now can tell Ji Ning in multiple voices that he’ll always love him ❤.
The tsundere child finally grew up <3
That’s such a sweet way to describe it – I’ll always love that knowing it was Ji Ning who was injured was enough for Jiang Che to break through Future’s entire programming – what a loyal ml!!
Zhou rin’s ending still makes me cry 😢 he still pitiful till the end..
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
I can’t stop crying af these chapters dnanchkq
Oh my god. I –
So Zhou rin is the part of Jiang Che that was in turmoil over confessing – and all Zhou rin’s longing to take his brother’s place, was Jiang Che’s longing for the fantasy to be real. And now, now, Zhou rin is telling ji Ning his true feelings. Jiang Che’s feelings. The one thing, so important, that he never told him. That he never got to.I need to lay down.