Sheng Renxing: “…”
It took him several minutes to react, “Xing Ye!”
Xing Ye couldn’t stop laughing on the other end, “Isn’t it me?”
“You-” Sheng Renxing was speechless for a moment, and after thinking for a while, he said, “You are my baby!”
As he said this, he started singing Justin Bieber’s “Baby”.
On the other end, Xing Ye didn’t say anything, but just kept on laughing.
Sheng Renxing: “Aren’t you?”
Xing Ye took a breath, his voice gentle and soft, “Where did you learn that?”
“Qiu Datou calls his sister that way.” Sheng Renxing thought for a moment.
After chatting for a while, Sheng Renxing opened his eyes again, looking at the night view outside. He could see the bridge lit up by car lights and the myriad of stars reflected under the bridge.
It looked like the Magpie Bridge.
He reached out and pushed the window, letting the wind in, which woke him up a bit. “Where are you?” he asked.
“Yangjiang Street,” Xing Ye replied.
Sheng Renxing was surprised. “Why did you go back?”
“I came back to get something,” Xing Ye explained.
“Oh,” Sheng Renxing said, “When you see Auntie, remember to say hello for me.”
“Sure,” Xing Ye replied. There was some faint noise on his end, like a quarrel or something. “Video call?”
“What?” Sheng Renxing asked, “I haven’t turned on the light yet.”
As he finished speaking, a video call came in. Sheng Renxing answered, “Why haven’t you turned on the light?”
“I don’t like it,” Xing Ye said.
“Oh,” Sheng Renxing leaned closer, squinting at the phone. All he could see was Xing Ye’s blurry figure in the darkness. “But I can’t see you.”
The screen on the other side shook for a moment, followed by a soft sound, “click.” After several seconds, the light flashed and turned on.
Xing Ye’s camera was pointing at himself, walking. Then the camera slowly lifted, revealing the room behind him. It was a bit messy, with a pile of women’s clothes on the sofa and uncleaned garbage on the table. The light was dismal and dim. Sheng Renxing could see that, like himself, Xing Ye was also next to a window. However, he was standing, while Sheng Renxing was sitting.
Sheng Renxing stared at the phone for a while, nestled in the low sofa.
Xing Ye: “Feeling sleepy?”
Sheng Renxing shook his head. “A bit dizzy, but not sleepy.”
“Why did you drink so much?”
“Just chatting with Qiu Datou, and I ended up drinking too much.”
Xing Ye flicked the ash from his cigarette, looking down at his phone with slightly lowered eyes. His eyes, backlit, looked deep, but his voice was very gentle, like the embodiment of “affectionate”: “What were you chatting about?”
“Just chatting about how much I want to kiss you,” Sheng Renxing said whatever came to mind, then furrowed his brow, trying to remember. “Just chatting about random stuff, his sister, little lambs, his parents.”
Xing Ye was stunned for a moment, then smiled, leaning against the wall and listening as Sheng Renxing slowly talked.
“We also talked about him going to Germany, right?” As he continued, he found it harder to remember, memories blending together. “Oh, he cried and said he wanted to go to Germany to study.”
That seemed to be it. He chuckled mischievously. “Damn, he cried his eyes out, silly fool.”
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“Mbg eclnfgrlas?” Wlcu Tf jrxfv.
“Tfjt,” Vtfcu Efczlcu mbcalcefv, “Llr qjgfcar kjca ab rfcv tlw atfgf.”
“Qtja jybea sbe? Cgf sbe ublcu?” Wlcu Tf lcdelgfv.
“P’w cba ublcu,” Vtfcu Efczlcu rtbbx tlr tfjv jcv yilcxfv. “Cgf sbe ublcu?”
Wlcu Tf rtbbx tlr tfjv.
“Yt,” Vtfcu Efczlcu’r ygbkr oeggbkfv, rtbklcu j tlca bo ectjqqlcfrr.
“Do you want to go?” Xing Ye asked.
“It’s alright,” Sheng Renxing replied.
He said, “I’ve been there before, and it’s just like that—houses, people, rivers, streets, and stars.” He glanced to the side. “Have you seen the stars?”
With that, he switched to the rear camera, showing the view outside that he had just seen. “Can you see them?”
“Yes, I can,” Xing Ye replied.
“Aren’t they beautiful?” Sheng Renxing asked.
“Yes, they are.”
The two looked at the night view on their phones. Suddenly, Sheng Renxing, a bit tipsy, said, “Not as beautiful as me.”
Xing Ye laughed and tried to get Sheng Renxing to switch back to the front camera.
[In the vast darkness,
Each planet can only illuminate its own light,
Squeezed onto its narrow orbit.
Even the brightest cannot reach the edge of the universe.
Are there other planets
Being born and dying?]
The camera shook, capturing the scene outside. The signal on Yangjiang Street was not good, and those points of light flickered, leaving residual traces like shooting stars. Xing Ye watched quietly, listening to him recite the poem.
[I don’t know you,
If we hadn’t met,
Our lights wouldn’t blend and shine together,
A new world is born in the meeting of planets,
In a universe farther than the unknown.]
Sheng Renxing’s voice always had a calming effect on him, like the settling of stirred-up sediment slowly sinking back to the seabed, creating gentle ripples.
[I could never
Find a star in the darkness crowded by planets.]
Both fell into silence. After a while, Xing Ye asked, “What’s the name of this poem?”
Sheng Renxing replied, “It doesn’t have a name.”
Xing Ye: “?”
Sheng Renxing: “I wrote it myself.” He hesitated for a while, then decided to say it.
“Last Chinese class was boring, wasn’t it? You were sleeping, Chen Ying was writing love poems to his girlfriend, and I was bored too, so I wrote this randomly. I thought it was bad and didn’t plan to show it to you.” His voice grew quieter towards the end.
He had never written love letters or poems before, and the first time felt like everything was wrong. He had impulsively written this “love poem” while looking at Xing Ye’s profile, but later, when he regained his senses, he realized how nonsensical and melodramatic it was. He immediately tore up the paper, thinking it was rubbish. However, it remained in his mind. Just now, after drinking a bit too much and watching the video, he inadvertently blurted it out.
There was no sound from the other end. He scratched his head, sneakily glanced at his phone, but saw only darkness.
He didn’t know if Xing Ye had turned off the light or covered the camera.
Sheng Renxing, feeling embarrassed and annoyed, tugged at his hair, his face flushed and buried in his collar. He muttered, “Damn it, I’m going to beat up Qiu Datou tomorrow for sure.”
Just then, there was a knock at the door. He immediately snapped out of it, saying, “I’m going to take a shower. I’m too drunk tonight. Let’s talk tomorrow morning. You should go to bed early. Good night.” He hung up and stood there, taking a deep breath, staring blankly at his phone.
When the person outside knocked on the door again, he snapped out of his reverie and ran to open the door.
After hearing that the poem was his own writing, Xing Ye had already covered the camera with his hand. He stood there for a while, his expression extremely calm, with a hint of sternness. It wasn’t until the video call was disconnected, and the screen turned white, that he finally moved, lifting his hand to bring the cigarette closer to his lips.
However, the cigarette had burned down to the end without him realizing it. When he touched it, it burned his hand. He frowned, flicked the cigarette butt away, rubbed his ear with his fingers, and waited for the heat to dissipate before finally figuring out what to say.
“You…” His voice was hoarse, sharp in the darkness. He coughed, then discreetly looked at his phone, only to realize the video call had ended.
Xing Ye raised his hand, licked the blood from his knuckles, and the taste of blood washed away his senses. He gritted his teeth and bit the wound, the pain overwhelming the surging emotions inside him.
He leaned against the wall with his eyes lowered, quietly muttering, “Damn it.”
Sheng Renxing woke up and the first thing he did was open his phone, seeing the “good night” message Xing Ye had sent him last night. He replied with half-opened eyes, saying “morning.”
After getting up, he looked at the room he had lived in for over ten years and felt a strange sense of unfamiliarity.
After washing up, he went downstairs for breakfast.
While walking down the stairs and looking at his phone, he glanced down unexpectedly and saw someone he didn’t expect.
He quickly put away his smile and put his phone back in his pocket.
Lin Yi saw him at a glance and greeted him, “Why are you up so early? Are you feeling unwell? Do you want some fried eggs?”
“Morning,” Sheng Renxing slowly made his way to the table and sat down. “Either is fine.”
At the table, Sheng Yan’s breakfast was still there, clearly only half-eaten. His fingers tapped on the table, listening to the person on the other end of the phone, occasionally responding as if he hadn’t seen Sheng Renxing.
Sheng Renxing glanced at him, then continued looking at his phone.
It wasn’t until Lin Yi brought the breakfast over that he said, “Thank you,” and Sheng Yan finally finished the call, put his phone aside, and thoughtfully rubbed his fingers together.
Sheng Renxing pierced the egg with his chopsticks and ate in silence, bowing his head without saying a word.
It was so quiet that only the sound of eating could be heard. Even Lin Yi was so quiet that she didn’t make a sound.
Halfway through eating, Sheng Yan spoke to him, “Did you hit your brother last night?”
Sheng Renxing slowly swallowed what was in his mouth. “Who’s my brother?”
“Did you hit him?” Sheng Yan tapped his fingers on the table.
“Did he complain to you?” Sheng Renxing picked out some carrot shreds from his salad.
“He’s in the hospital,” Sheng Yan said.
Sheng Renxing paused, raised his eyes to look at him, surprised. “He’s so fragile?”
Sheng Yan closed his eyes. “Go to the hospital later and check on him.”
“I’m not going,” Sheng Renxing immediately refused. “I’m going back to Xuancheng later, so I’m busy.”
“Intentional injury,” Sheng Yan chuckled. “Do you want to go to court?”
“Wait until you’ve served me the summons,” Sheng Renxing shrugged off his threat.
“Okay,” Sheng Yan nodded. “Then call Xiao Qiu and ask him to visit the hospital.”
“What’s it to him? He didn’t lay a hand on anyone,” Sheng Renxing sneered.
“You don’t get to decide that,” Sheng Yan took a sip of water.
Sheng Renxing stared at the lettuce on his fork, lost his appetite after a while, and put down his fork. “Which hospital? I’ll go there and pay my respects.”
Sheng Yan looked at him for a while, then shook his head with a look on his face that seemed like a sigh. “You’ve suffered such a big loss, but you haven’t learned anything. That’s impressive.”
“I won’t bother worrying about you then,” Sheng Renxing said coldly.
“Then let’s get to the point,” Sheng Yan said. “How long do you want to keep this up?”
“What am I keeping up?” Sheng Renxing was puzzled.
Sheng Yan made a gesture to stop. “I don’t want to waste my time with you.”
“If your time is so precious, why waste a minute on a few lives?” Sheng Renxing raised an eyebrow, smiling, but his eyes were fierce.
“Do we have to talk like this?” Sheng Yan asked.
“I didn’t plan on talking to you,” Sheng Renxing shrugged.
Sheng Yan made a downward gesture. “You’ve been in Xuancheng for six months, and your skill in annoying me has improved. Are you calm now?”
“I am calm,” Sheng Renxing said.
“Then you’ve been hanging out with your friends in Xuancheng for too long,” Sheng Yan nodded slightly. “You can’t tell what’s important anymore.”
Sheng Renxing said, “What does it have to do with them?”
“Do you think you can tell what’s important?” Sheng Yan asked.
Sheng Renxing’s face had turned cold, devoid of any expression. His gaze was not that of a son looking at his father. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve never interfered with your friendships,” Sheng Yan said, folding his hands on the table. “But certain people can be useful in certain situations.”
Sheng Renxing was infuriated by his condescending tone and interrupted him. “Are you trying to pick a fight with me?”
Sheng Yan furrowed his brows, looked at him for a few seconds, and said, “Why are you reacting so strongly to what I said?”
“I won’t befriend someone just because they might be ‘useful.’ Don’t try to speculate about me with your nonsense ideas,” Sheng Renxing said.
Sheng Yan chuckled softly. “Childish.”
“Why then do they befriend you?” Sheng Renxing asked.
“What I mean is, don’t be so naive,” Sheng Yan said calmly.
“I get along with them just fine, no need for you to worry. Do you think everyone is like you? How come you’ve turned into a Cao Qiao after six months of not seeing you!” Sheng Renxing’s voice grew louder. Lin Yi wanted to come over and mediate, but hesitated, standing awkwardly on the side.
Sheng Yan remained unruffled, his expression even more gentle, with a hint of a tolerant smile. However, his words were sharp as a knife. “Then how do you affirm their worth? You grew up differently, have different personalities, and come from different backgrounds. I have some understanding of your friends. People who are not afraid of poverty are afraid of inequality. When they see you, don’t they feel inferior? Even if they are slow now, what about university? Graduation? Let’s be blunt, you are not from the same world. You can’t even find topics to talk about. If he says the oil price went up today, or the vegetable prices went up, or his family wants to buy a new sofa, do you want to respond with the stock you hold in oil?”
Sheng Yan leaned in, getting closer to him. “Or perhaps, are you willing to live that kind of life for these ‘friends’? If you do, then I must say, I admire you.”
Sheng Renxing looked up. “I’m just curious, have you ever truly connected with someone? You talk as if you’ve been hurt by someone. Do you have some unknown psychological trauma? You talk about everyone who gets close to me as having ulterior motives, measuring sincerity with ‘usefulness,’ and thinking about returns and losses before giving anything.”
“If I become like that, what’s the difference between you and me?” His eyes seemed to spark, burning brightly in his amber-colored eyes. “It would be too pitiful.”
damnnn that was intense
Tbh I do think Sheng Renxing beating his step brother into the hospital was overkill (the poor sap seems to be more afraid of him than anything and it’s not like he even provoked SRX) and Lin Yi doesn’t seem to be that bad either, but Sheng Yan can go fuck himself in a ditch for all I care
Also lovely translation of the poem! It captures the essence of the raws very well
Thank you^ ヾ(>᎑<`๑)