Time slipped by silently, minute by minute, as the old clock on the desk ticked towards midnight, making a soft “click” in the quiet night.
The person beside him appeared to be in a deep slumber. Their breathing was slow and rhythmic, their muscles at ease, and their body melting into the soft mattress.
Shen Heng quietly opened his eyes, his gaze was still clear and sharp.
He took a deep breath and carefully turned over.
Zhai Yao was sleeping with his back turned towards him, and from this angle, Shen Heng could see the little whorl on the back of Zhai Yao’s head.
It was tiny and round, usually hidden among his hair, making it nearly impossible to notice.
It made one want to reach out and poke it.
Very… adorable.
Shen Heng inadvertently used that word again. If Zhai Yao knew, he’d definitely give him a beating.
He gazed at the back of Zhai Yao’s head for a while longer, then slowly extended his arm, brushing against Zhai Yao’s body, and gently encircled him in a loose embrace.
Shen Heng’s Adam’s apple bobbed as his hand, which was wrapped around Zhai Yao, slid down slightly by half an inch…
Then another half inch…
And finally stopped at the point where he could feel Zhai Yao’s body heat through the thin T-shirt.
In that moment, Shen Heng suddenly understood the saying, “Give him an inch, and he’ll take a mile.”
Zhai Yao suddenly moved and turned over, causing the crocheted dog in his arms to fall to the floor and roll away.
Shen Heng quickly closed his eyes, pretending to be asleep as he steadied his breathing. After a while, seeing that Zhai Yao hadn’t woken up, he lightly opened his eyes again.
His eyes, dark and still like cold water, stared intently at Zhai Yao. His brows drew together subtly, as if he were trying to solve a cryptically confusing advanced maths problem.
In his memory, it had been a while since he had pondered something with such seriousness.
The endless trivialities of life and constant mundane troubles had left him in a state of near numbness for ages.
Subconsciously, it was as if Shen Heng’s mind was whispering to him that, he had long known the answer to the question, but he hesitated to confront it head-on.
No matter how much he analyzed and calculated, trying to derive a different answer, it was nothing more than an attempt of self-deception in the end.
Shen Heng’s gaze moved from Zhai Yao’s eyebrows to his thin eyelids, eyelashes, and nose bridge, slowly descending bit by bit until it finally locked onto his lips…
A strong surge of impulse was heedlessly replacing all rational thought, crazily and unreasonably taking over his mind.
Just try it.
Try it, and everything would be clear.
Shen Heng’s eyes darkened further as he propped himself up on the bed and slowly moved closer to Zhai Yao.
Like a seasoned sailor, yet still ensnared by the siren’s song despite years at sea.
Zhai Yao’s eyebrows suddenly twitched and furrowed, and his hand fumbled around the bed.
Shen Heng froze instantly, his mind feeling as if it had just been jolted back to life with a snap.
He quickly shifted his body back, silently observing Zhai Yao in the dark, deducing from his behaviour that he was probably searching for the dropped crocheted puppy.
Shen Heng pressed his lips together, calming his emotions, and decided to get up and help Zhai Yao pick up the crocheted puppy from the floor.
Just as he was about to lift the blanket and get out of bed, Zhai Yao’s hand unexpectedly reached over from the side.
As if finally finding his lost puppy, Zhai Yao, in his sleep, pressed his whole body against Shen Heng, wrapping his arms around him and burying his head completely in Shen Heng’s chest.
So warm and comforting…
As expected, hugging the crocheted puppy is a must after all…
Zhai Yao thought drowsily in his dream.
He huddled up again, smoothed his furrowed brow, and habitually nuzzled the “crocheted puppy” with his face, letting out a soft hum unconsciously.
Like a cat in blissful satisfaction.
Shen Heng felt his mind go blank again, his breath hitching for several beats.
He hastily flipped out of bed, grabbed his phone, and made a dash for the door.
Because of the sudden commotion, Zhai Yao’s eyelids twitched and fluttered open reluctantly, his expression a mix of grogginess and displeasure from being rudely awakened.
“What’s with you in the dead of night…” His half-asleep voice was slightly nasal, lacking its usual aloofness, almost coming across as if he was whining to Shen Heng.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
“Thirsty,” Shen Heng’s voice was hoarse. He hurriedly left the bedroom after uttering those words.
He went to the water dispenser, filled a large cup, and drank it down. Despite that, he still felt parched.
He then opened the fridge, took out a bottle of ice-cold mineral water, and twisted it open. With a series of gulps, he drank it down to the last drop.
The heart-penetrating chilling water coursed through his throat into his stomach, yet it did little to cool the seething blood inside him.
Shen Heng rubbed his index and middle fingers together, sensing a desperate craving for a smoke.
Leaning against the closed fridge door, he closed his eyes and heard his heart pounding uncontrollably.
Each beat echoed the truth deep within him—
He really had fallen for Zhai Yao.
Since when?
That night he found him in the abandoned railway platform’s duty room?
Or when he braved the rain to pick him up in Fang Mountain?
Or even earlier…
Before the current juncture, Shen Heng had asserted that he probably wouldn’t fall in love with anyone in this lifetime, regardless of whether they were women or men.
Yet that ill-tempered crocheted puppy unreasonably appeared, firmly rooting itself in the depths of his heart without permission, leaving him caught off guard and at a complete loss…
There was no sound from the bedroom; Zhai Yao must have fallen asleep again.
Shen Heng slowly sat down on the sofa, leaned back, and silently stared at the ceiling.
Mm, I have fallen for him.
And then?
What do I do from here?
Amidst the turning of the years, he had gathered numerous experiences dealing with the hardships that life presented.
Yet when it came to falling for someone, he found himself completely helpless, his mind filled with the “404 Page Not Found” message.
Shen Heng drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly, ultimately choosing to use up the quota for that one cigarette.
The cigarette’s glow flickered between his fingers as a spam message popped up on his phone nearby—
Be Gege’s little sexy wild kitty; make late nights no longer lonely and sleepless!
Shen Heng deleted the message with a blank expression.
He had never browsed those kinds of adult websites before and had no idea how such things ended up on his phone, as though someone knew he was struggling with insomnia.
He couldn’t care less about any wild kitties or doggies; it was only that crocheted puppy…
Shen Heng took another deep drag on the cigarette, tossing the phone aside.
After a while, he picked it up again, unlocked it, and hesitantly opened the browser.
—What to do when you fall for someone?
All the way up to this very moment, Shen Heng would never have believed he’d do something so foolish.
Not sleeping in the middle of the night, turning to Baidu for answers?
For a common cold, Baidu might even diagnose it as cancer; those answers are hardly reliable.
The responses came very quickly.
【If you like them, go ahead and boldly chase after them!】
【What the! I was clearly looking for a hookup guide, how did I end up on such a pure lovey page?】
【Love ’em, then get ’em!】
【Is this question from a primary school student? Hhhhh!】
…
…
As expected, nothing was worth referencing at all.
Shen Heng’s hand hovered over the search bar, hesitating for a moment, then he typed: —What to do when you like… someone of the same sex?
The page loaded.
The answer turned out to be completely different from earlier, with some points even touching upon Shen Heng’s blind spots in knowledge.
【Gege is 1 or 0?】
【Personally, I’m 0, into mascular x slim, piggies don’t disturb!】
【New bar opening, hiring premium male models xxxxx】
【Why do gay guys love working out?】
…
…
Shen Heng’s brows furrowed deeper and deeper, his entire face tensing as he scrolled through the endless information, the lines of his expression tightening with a chilling intensity.
At last, amidst the sea of baffling replies, he stumbled upon one that appeared reasonably normal—
【Please, never! Lock away those feelings forever! Your love will only hurt each other, and in the end, you won’t even have friendship left! Stop right there, friend, let this be the end of it!】
Shen Heng turned off his phone again, tossing it aside.
The ash on his cigarette had accumulated in a bunch at the tip, falling onto his leg as he moved.
Shen Heng dusted it off, his ink-black eyes sinking back into the darkness, blending into the night, their depths unfathomable.
After another long stretch of silence, he gently closed his eyes, rubbed his temples lightly, then opened them again. Following yet another pause, he meticulously deleted every trace of his browsing history.
His gaze lingered on the reply advising him to “lock away” for a few seconds before he exited the page indifferently.
“Serve you right for getting BE-ed.”
Baidu, as expected, cannot be trusted.
…
His phone suddenly vibrated again. Thinking it was another spam message, Shen Heng was about to delete it when Zhai Yao’s black avatar appeared.
【Out-of-reach: Sneaking a smoke, huh? We’re even now.】
Shen Heng lifted his gaze towards the bedroom, where the bedside lamp popped and filled the entire room.
Zhai Yao was leaning against the headboard, eyes half-open, lazily watching him.
His hair was sticking up at the back, and he looked thoroughly annoyed.
Shen Heng didn’t rush to get up, silently locking eyes with Zhai Yao for a moment before typing—
【111: Why are you awake?】
He saw Zhai Yao check his phone, his hand moving to type.
【Out-of-reach: Woke up from being choked by the smoke.】
Shen Heng’s lips lifted slightly, suddenly curious about how Zhai Yao would react if he knew the real reason behind his decision to get up and smoke.
【111: Couldn’t sleep, so got up and sat around for a bit.】
After Shen Heng sent the message, Zhai Yao didn’t reply anymore.
Instead, he interlaced his fingers and stretched, lifted the blanket, and while passing by, bent down to retrieve the crocheted puppy from the floor, carrying it with him to the living room.
He sat down next to Shen Heng.
No words were said.
And so, they sat side-by-side in silence for a while longer, before Shen Heng stubbed out his cigarette, threw the butt into the dustbin, and stood up.
“Not smoking anymore,” he said, “I’ll go brush my teeth. You head back to bed.”
Zhai Yao, wearing a cold expression and crossed arms, gave him a casual sideways glance.
“That cigarette counts towards today’s quota.”
“Mm.”
Zhai Yao pushed his tongue against his cheek and pretended to ask nonchalantly, “What were you thinking that made you smoke again?”
After he asked, Shen Heng remained silent for a long time, his eyes fixed on Zhai Yao through the darkness.
Zhai Yao felt inexplicably unnerved by the other’s gaze, but he still maintained his frown and stared back at him coldly.
“Thinking about you,” Shen Heng finally said.
Zhai Yao’s eyes trembled slightly, and he abruptly stood up with a jolt, causing the crocheted puppy to fall to the floor once more.
Shen Heng remained composed throughout, silently observing Zhai Yao’s continuous movements, his eyes quietly reflecting a hint of probing and contemplation.
“Bloody hell, you’re…” Shen Heng’s words sobered Zhai Yao up, yet mindful of not disturbing Shen Ziyao and Xiao Lajiao, he lowered his voice and hastily blurted, “You’re fricking… you’re not allowed to think!”
Shen Heng raised an eyebrow slightly. “Why?”
“Wh—”
Zhai Yao was at a loss for words.
He also didn’t even know what he was panicking about.
Shen Heng said calmly, “I’m just thinking about you…”
“F*ck.”
“…and your crocheted puppy.” After a moment’s pause, Shen Heng quipped softly, “You two have a pretty close bond with each other.”
“?” Zhai Yao was dumbfounded.
“Hugging it makes you fall asleep so quickly. Maybe I should get one too.”
…
*
A baffling interrogation, amidst a baffling conversation, concluded in an equally baffling manner.
The two returned to the bedroom, and this time, Zhai Yao, perhaps out of pride, adamantly refused to cuddle with the crocheted puppy again.
Shen Heng didn’t say anything either, silently taking the crocheted puppy and placing it on his own side.
As dawn approached, Shen Heng cast a remarkably lucid gaze out the window.
The first golden leaf of autumn coincidentally fell from the tree.
The old man at the guardhouse downstairs was already up, sweeping the ground with a broom. From the radio on his bamboo chair, a clear storyteller’s voice echoed—
“As the saying goes, ‘He will win who, prepared himself, waits to take the enemy unprepared‘… Now, let’s talk about how Cao Cao, also known as Cao Mengde, led 5,000 elite soldiers to battle Liu Bei at Changban…”
Shen Heng got up quietly and closed the window.
The noise was immediately shut out.
He turned his head, gazing at the person sleeping in bed bathed in the faint morning light.
Lock away? Impossible.
Some ideas sprang up in his mind like wildflowers…
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Thanks for the update ❤️❤️❤️
YEAAAA THE FEELINGS HAVE BEEN REALIZED!!! And he’s immediately ready to woo 😎 good luck Shen Heng!!! Clearly Zhai Yao has some feelings already, but getting him to acknowledge them will probably be a lot more difficult lol
Also, by “piggies don’t disturb”, unfortunately I think that commenter means “fat people” 😓 unfortunately common wording on some sites
Yess 😊 finally Shen gege confirm his feelings I am so happy
Thank you for the chapter
Finally! Oooh Shen hang is about to start chasing his boo 😆 tho it’s probably not going to be easy, go shen heng! You can do this!
Thank you for the chapter! ❤️ I was honestly anxiously wait for the update
What does BE mean ?
Bad ending!