Hyun Gyujin checked his phone suspiciously.
[Tutor: I had to be hospitalized suddenly due to a broken ankle]
[Tutor: I have surgery tomorrow and will be hospitalized for 2 weeks, followed by 2 weeks of rehabilitation, so I won’t be able to tutor you during the vacation.]
[Tutor: It’s such an important time for you, I’m so sorryㅠㅠ]
“Are you kidding me? How does a perfectly fine leg suddenly break?” Hyun Gyujin thought, doubting the message. Is he just trying to get out of tutoring to enjoy the vacation? To dispel his disbelief, a photo of a leg in a cast appeared on the screen.
“Ah, damn…”
Either way, this wasn’t helpful. He had been looking forward to the tutoring sessions and now they were canceled for the entire break. It felt like the whole world was conspiring to keep him and Yuwon from becoming close.
“…Ah…”
This really sucks. He had even sprayed on cologne as soon as he got home, preparing to go to Yuwon’s place, but thanks to Junseo, nothing was going right. At least he hadn’t left yet. If he had heard the news while with Yuwon, he would have awkwardly left immediately.
“Ugh, so annoying.”
He went back to his room, took off his hoodie, and lay on the bed in just his t-shirt. Why was nothing working out? This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. He turned to face the wall and picked up his phone again. Yuwon’s messages, worrying about the tutor, appeared on the screen.
[Yuwon: What should we doㅠㅠ You must be shocked]
[Yuwon: The most important thing is for you to get better, so don’t worry about us]
[Yuwon: We’ll manage just fine]
…Maybe I should’ve broken an arm instead of just getting hit earlier. Then maybe Jung Yuwon would be worrying about me like this. Maybe we’d be together right now.
Hyun Gyujin, feeling pathetic, was about to put his phone down when he imagined Yuwon’s nagging. He hastily typed a message, wishing for a full recovery. That should be enough, right? He hesitated, then erased the words and wrote a longer message.
[Good luck with the surgery]
[Tutor: Yuwon, Gyujin, thank you so much and I’m sorryㅠㅠ I’ll recover quickly and work really hard from March]
[Tutor: I’ll contact your parents separately]
[Tutor: I’ll send you the 1000 practice questions I prepared for the break via email now]
Watching Yuwon continue the conversation, Hyun Gyujin turned his phone face down on the bed. Even though it kept vibrating, he didn’t want to check it. With the opportunity to see and talk to Yuwon officially gone, nothing else mattered.
Should I just ask if I can drop by? Say I have something to say? Maybe apologize? Jung Yuwon is nice, maybe he’d listen. Or maybe he’d say it’s too late for apologies. What should I do then? Suggest meeting outside? Maybe having mango smoothies would lighten the mood a little?
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
‘I’m starting to hate you, too.’
Tekbc’r nblmf, rjslcu tf tjafv tlw, fmtbfv lc tlr wlcv, wjxlcu tlw offi fnfc wbgf ecrfaaifv. Lsec Xseplc qeiifv atf yijcxfa bnfg tlr ojmf, atfc ijs yjmx vbkc, rajglcu ja atf mflilcu.
Zjcub? Vfglberis? Lf xcfk la kjrc’a fcbeut ab olz atlcur. Dea lo j wjcub sbuega rwbbatlf mbeiv wjxf Tekbc j yla tjqqlfg, tf kjr vfrqfgjaf fcbeut ab ags. Lsec Xseplc qlmxfv eq tlr qtbcf jujlc jcv bqfcfv atf mtja klat Tekbc.
“…….”
Should I send a message or not? Ask to meet briefly? But if it doesn’t go well, what then? Ah…. I should’ve just taken more hits earlier. Then at least I’d have an excuse to see him. Why did the tutoring have to be canceled now?!
His thoughts kept circling. Should I reach out? What if he says no? Why did the tutor have to break his leg now?! Should I still reach out? What if he tells me to get lost? His thoughts kept running in circles, leaving him more confused. He put his phone down again and closed his eyes.
Ah, Jung Yuwon, Jung Yuwon, Jung Yuwon.
In his looping thoughts, everything revolved around Yuwon.
* * *
The situation with Lee Woojun was resolved quietly. Yuwon wanted to pretend it never happened, as long as Hyun Gyujin wasn’t punished. He didn’t want his parents involved and didn’t want the issue to escalate and cause problems for Hyun Gyujin. He knew the matter would be settled if he let it go and Woojun did the same about their fight. The teachers, not wanting to complicate things, gladly accepted Yuwon’s proposal.
Hyun Gyujin insisted it was unacceptable, but in the end, he had to follow Yuwon’s decision, knowing it was made with his best interests in mind.
“Letting a jerk like that off isn’t right. He’ll do it again if he thinks he can get away with it.”
“Then we’ll deal with it then.”
“Why let it slide if it upset you?”
“…Honestly, it did bother me, but I told you, I don’t remember much. I really don’t. I tried to think about other things, and when you hit Woojun, I was so shocked I forgot what I heard.”
Seeing Yuwon’s genuinely forgetful expression, Hyun Gyujin bent over, resting his hands on his knees. It was a relief Yuwon didn’t remember the disgusting comments, but he couldn’t stand that Yuwon was pretending it didn’t matter.
“You’re doing this because of me, afraid I’ll get in trouble.”
“……”
“You’re worried that jerk will drag me down with him.”
“Yeah…. That’s part of it. So don’t fight because of me anymore…. I don’t want you getting hurt, and I don’t want to worry my aunt and uncle.”
“Are you saying this to end things between us?”
Hyun Gyujin needed to know if Yuwon’s words meant they were over or if there was still hope. He wanted to understand the feelings behind Yuwon’s concern.
He hadn’t planned to ask like this, but he was desperate to know, fearing he might lose the chance if he waited.
“Are you saying I shouldn’t care about you because we’re nothing to each other?”
“…That’s not what I mean.”
“Then what do you mean?”
“……”
“Should we go somewhere else? It’s a bit awkward talking here at school.”
When Hyun Gyujin felt that Yuwon wouldn’t reject his suggestion, he spoke very carefully. As expected, Yuwon didn’t refuse and quietly nodded. Feeling inwardly elated, Hyun Gyujin naturally took Yuwon’s bag. It wasn’t heavy since they didn’t bring study materials for the holiday, but he preferred to carry anything for Yuwon.
“Give me the bag… It’s not even heavy today.”
“You don’t look good carrying a bag.”
“……”
“I’m serious. Ah, where should we go? The counseling room? Or maybe a café?”
“Let’s go to the counseling room. It’s a bit awkward with other people at a café.”
“Ah… Right. Let’s go.”
They left the quiet classroom, walked through an even quieter hallway, and crossed an empty sky bridge without saying a word. Despite the silence, Hyun Gyujin felt a glimmer of hope because Yuwon didn’t avoid the conversation. He preferred walking slowly at Yuwon’s pace over striding quickly on his own.
“Go in.”
Once inside the counseling room, Hyun Gyujin closed the door, causing dust to scatter. Waving away the dust near Yuwon, Hyun Gyujin wiped off a chair with his bag and gestured for Yuwon to sit.
“Before we continue our earlier conversation, there’s something I want to say…”
“What is it?”
Hyun Gyujin, perched on the edge of a desk opposite Yuwon’s chair, fiddled with his hands. Noticing Yuwon’s gaze shifting from his intertwined fingers to his face, he took a deep breath.
“…I said some really harsh things in the art room that day. I shouldn’t have said that just because I was upset. I’m sorry. I wanted to apologize.”
“Ah… I wasn’t perfect either back then.”
“No, it was my fault. You have every right to be turned off. I was so crazy about you… I was really out of my mind.”
Hearing Hyun Gyujin’s raw, mixed emotions, Yuwon’s ears turned red. Despite his attempts to hide his feelings, it was clear that they weren’t just friends anymore, and he regretted not hiding them better. If he had, they might still be good friends.
“When we were just friends, we never fought over things like this. We only ever had minor arguments while playing around.”
Hyun Gyujin’s lips curled into a faint smile as he recalled past disagreements with Yuwon.
“Every reason we fought was because of me. I’d joke around, make you angry, get caught smoking secretly…”
“Back then, I might get a bit angry at your jokes, but it didn’t really upset me. When you’d show up at night with ice cream and smile, everything felt fine, and I’d forget why we fought. But this time, it’s different.”
“……”
“It hurts and it’s scary. When we were friends, we could quickly make up after a fight, and we were still friends. But now, it’s not the same.”
Hyun Gyujin wanted to argue, but he couldn’t say a word. He realized that as their relationship changed, the consequences of their actions had also changed.
“If I hadn’t liked you, if I hadn’t been caught, none of this would have happened… I’m sorry.”
“Why are you apologizing for that?”
“…If I had hidden it better, we’d still be friends. We wouldn’t be fighting over this.”
Looking at Yuwon, who seemed dejected with his eyes downcast and lips slightly pouting, Hyun Gyujin felt a mix of frustration and the urge to hug him because he looked so cute. It was fascinating how such conflicting emotions could coexist.
“You don’t need to think like that because even if we went back, you couldn’t hide it. You can’t act, and you can’t lie well. When you like someone, it shows all over your face. What would you even hide? Back when we were kids, you used to tell me you loved playing with me every day, giving me kisses all the time. How would you hide that? You can’t.”
“Why are you bringing up me kissing you as a kid now…?”
“Because it’s the same now as it was then. Thinking you could have hidden it and we’d still be friends is nonsense, so stop thinking that.”
Yuwon, feeling a bit dumbfounded, stared at Hyun Gyujin. Hyun Gyujin was so good with words that Yuwon had never won an argument, but today was particularly bad. Defeat seemed inevitable. Hyun Gyujin was right about Yuwon’s inability to hide his feelings and his frequent kisses back then, leaving Yuwon speechless.
Even now, he remembered how much he loved playing with Hyun Gyujin when they were kids. He’d fall asleep thinking about Hyun Gyujin, eager for the next day. Upon waking, he’d head straight to Hyun Gyujin’s house to play games or with toys.
It was true that seeing Hyun Gyujin made him so happy he’d greet him with a kiss and give more kisses throughout the day and when parting ways, promising to play again the next day. Sighing softly, Yuwon lowered his head. He couldn’t argue against Hyun Gyujin’s talk of kisses because it was true.
“Am I wrong? Aren’t I? You still can’t hide your feelings.”
“W-what do you mean…?”
“You still like me.”
