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The Silly Wizard's Courtship MethodChapter 4

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  Wu Lin followed Tang Wenye to the shop, watched him buy a pair of swimming trunks that were three or four times more expensive and immediately wanted to wring his wrists. He had brought everything but why didn’t he think to bring an extra pair of swimming trunks ne? If the two wore identical swimming trunks then even if they weren’t sweethearts, their relationship would seem extraordinary ah.

  tHh4KE

  Tang Wenye naturally didn’t know the thoughts of the simple-minded and foolish looking ‘Harry’s cousin’ beside him while he was wholeheartedly searching for a remote hot spring. During leisure time, one ought to completely relax and since he didn’t see any of the company’s people then he naturally wouldn’t go out of his way to find them. He believed that there also wouldn’t be anyone who would want to see him at this time anyways.

 

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

  Regarding this, Wu Lin couldn’t ask for anything more.

  I0VCE5

  When he first entered the hot spring, Wu Lin felt that the water temperature was unbearably high and wanted nothing more than to jump out. However, after soaking for a while, drowsiness hit him and his eyelids began to droop continuously.

 

  In the distance, something made a crashing sound when it fell. 

 

TdaVx3

  Tang Wenye unhurriedly removed the towel on his face and opened his eyes. He found Wu Lin’s arm resting against his. His long lashes that gently curled upwards softened the lines of his face, making him appear even more delicate than most girls.

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  When he felt his heartbeat suddenly speed up, Tang Wenye abruptly moved away. 

  IJudFf

  Wu Lin’s center of gravity became unstable and the entire person slid into the water.

 

  Tang Wenye was stunned. Just when he was about to grab Wu Lin, he found him suddenly enveloped within an invisible bubble. Not only was the water unable to enter, even his hand couldn’t touch him.

  U8KeDu

  Wu Lin, who had fallen into a daze, was suddenly submerged in water. Without thinking, he hastily drew an enchantment with his hand but when he opened his eyes and clearly saw his surroundings, his head exploded and became even more muddled.

 

  “You……” After a long time, Tang Wenye was only able to choke out this one word.

  Nx7fEy

  “I……” Wu Lin foolishly continued.

 

  Two pairs of eyes met. One was shocked, the other embarrassed.

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  qvkDwd

  In a split second, many thoughts flew through Tang Wenye’s mind, such as fleeing for his life, such as kneeling and begging for mercy, such as shouting for help, such as…… However, what he wanted to say absolutely wasn’t “Let’s get out first?” As soon as he said that, he wanted to just bury his head into the hot spring to sober up. Sure enough, fear and panic made people speak carelessly.

 

  “Oh.” When Wu Lin lifted the enchantment, the two people once again fell back into the water. 

  JQPdgo

  Tang Wenye resisted the urge to turn and run as he took a deep breath, “Are you really a wizard?”

 

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

  Wu Lin nodded solemnly.

  PmZkYh

  “Then what is your purpose for coming to Earth?” Tang Wenye felt as if he joined the cast of 《The X-Files》.

 

  Wu Lin was startled and replied, “Because I am a person of Earth.”

  …… x3L6ob

  Since he was an inhabitant of Earth, he probably wouldn’t destroy Earth ba?

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  Tang Wenye was a little relieved. “Then why did you join Xinwei group?”

  eOBGtV

  Wu Lin replied honestly, “Only by working will I have a salary ah.”

 

  This indicated that he also had the needs of ordinary people. Tang Wenye felt even more reassured. However, there was another matter that made him feel restless from beginning to end, like a fish bone stuck in his throat, and that was ——

  9Us tP

  “Why do you want my address?”

 

  “My cousin told me to ask,” Wu Lin said.

  zr2MVx

  Tang Wenye wrinkled his brow. “Your cousin wouldn’t really be…… Harry Potter ba?” Could it be that what J.K. Rowling wrote wasn’t fiction but a documentary? But what is Harry Potter finding him instead of Ginny for?

 

  Wu Lin’s clear voice interrupted his thoughts. “No, his name is Yuan Zhenjie.”

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  jZUuMG

  “It sounds Chinese.”

 

  “He is indeed Chinese.”

  5GnMD0

  After so many twists and turns, Tang Wenye still didn’t get the answer that he wanted. “In the end, what does he want my address for?”

 

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  “Cousin said,” Wu Lin was a little bashful and lowered his head as he mustered his courage, “If you know yourself and know your enemy, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.” [T/N: from Sun Tzu’s “Art of War”]

  RxdrpL

  “……” Tang Wenye began trying to recall when he had offended a man named Yuan Zhengjie. 

 

  Wu Lin continued, “Only by thoroughly understanding you would I be able to successfully chase after you.”

  i2ObFL

  “Chase after……” Tang Wenye stared at him incredulously.

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  Wu Lin coughed then slowly stood up in front of him. After performing an ancient wizard ritual, he said in an exceedingly solemn tone, “Tang Wenye xiansheng (mister), are you willing to be my lover?”

  …… DCf4ci

  Was somebody messing with him or had he still not awoken from a very realistic nightmare? 

 

  Tang Wenye asked himself inwardly. 

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

  aPlrLJ

  Vfflcu tlw cba gfqis obg j ibcu alwf, Qe Olc’r mbwqifzlbc yfmjwf wbgf jcv wbgf ecrlutais. Lf kbgglfvis mjiifv bea, “Kjcu Qfcsf……”

 

  “Yxjs!” Kjcu Qfcsf revvfcis kjnfv tlr tjcv jcv cewfgber kjafg vgbqifar rqijrtfv bea.

  pU0LcJ

  Qe Olc kjamtfv tlw ecyilcxlcuis.

 

  “P’w rbggs yea P’w cba lcafgfrafv lc wfc.” Qlat atja, Kjcu Qfcsf delmxis aegcfv jgbecv jcv kjixfv abkjgvr atf fvuf bo atf kjafg. 

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  oFEdg7

  Just when Wu Lin opened his mouth to say something, a huge black hole suddenly appeared above the hot spring. 

 

  From the black hole came eerie laughter.

  “Let me see what I found. Jié jié …… it turned out to be a xiao dou ding of the Stirling family and a foolish da dou ding.” 53Idf4

 

  Tang Wenye just realized that he had become a foolish child in her words when he felt a strong suction force that sent himself and Wu Lin into the black hole.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

  

  When Tang Wenye woke up, he felt as if his whole person had been sitting in a sieve and had been shaken incessantly. The sound of voices, footsteps, and waves unceasingly hit him. sR016z

  ……

  The sound of waves?

 

  He abruptly sat up and looked around with wide eyes. cJjHCy

 

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  It was an unfamiliar bedroom. There was a bed, a kitchen, a sofa and a window. However, what was certain was that, in the last twenty or so years of his life, he had never dreamed of this place before, let alone having seen it! 

 

  The window was open and he could smell salty wafts of sea breeze come in from outside. n8yKlT

 

  He quickly jumped out of the bed and rushed over to the window. All he could see was the dark, starry sky and undulating waves that stretched into the horizon.

 

  Even if all the hot springs at the hot spring hotel he was staying at were added up, it still wouldn’t be able to turn into this kind of landscape ba qpXeD3

 

  What on Earth happened?!

 

  His fingers clung tightly to the window frame as memories rushed into his mind like water through a flood gate. QKaSLR

 

  Wu Lin’s confession……

 

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  An eerie laughter…… DemNy3

 

  As well as……

 

  That huge black hole! 4F9Vej

 

  Could it be that this was no longer the human world?!

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  “Wu Lin…… Wu Lin!” He first poked his head out of the window and shouted several times. When he found that there was no effect, he turned and rushed out of the room. JbfmU9

 

  Outside the room was a long corridor.

 

  Looking at the sailors hurrying back and forth in the corridor, Tang Wenye was finally certain that he was now on a ship and it was a ship that was full of foreigners.  bdMRoQ

 

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  The ship rocked violently.

 

  He supported himself against the door frame and stabilized his body, then reached out to grab a sailor’s clothes.  gAo2Q

 

  “What are you doing?” The sailor angrily turned around and spewed out fluent Chinese.

 

  Tang Wenye was stunned but didn’t think more about it. “Where is this?” jTOGf8

 

  “The ship is sinking! Quickly go and make preparations ba!” Instead of answering his question, the sailor yanked his clothes out of his hand and continued hurrying down his original route, leaving Tang Wenye standing foolishly in place. 

 

  …… The ship is sinking?  BYgdOG

 

  His thoughts jumped. He had heard of the term transmigration. Did he transmigrate onto some ship that was about to sink? 

 

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

  Thinking of this, he could no longer remain calm and ran in the direction the sailor had left in.  VzIgR1

 

  It was already chaotic outside. There was screaming and crying everywhere and everyone frantically scuttled around the ship like *mole crickets and ants, as if they were afraid that they would immediately die as soon as their footsteps stopped. 

  d2kjKQ

  Meanwhile, the dark sky and the deep blue sea behind them remained vast and boundless, but also indifferent. 

 

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  The ship travelled along the boundary between the sky and the sea. It was as insignificant as an ant, just like the people on it. 

  n2kwtN

  Tang Wenye rushed onto the deck and looked up. He stared blankly at the huge iceberg that was slowly approaching before his eyes.

 

  Iceberg? Sinking ship? Westerners in long skirts and suits? 

  …… QM2Plx

  Could it be?

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

 

  Don’t tell him that the name of this ship was the Titanic! 

  aFjTEx

  Tang Wenye felt like he was on the verge of collapse. 

 

  “Tang Wenye.” A familiar voice sounded beside his ear.

  d9GdgH

  He turned his head and saw Wu Lin looking at him innocently with his large eyes, his face full of happiness. “I finally found you.”

 

  “Damn it! Could you tell me what’s going on!” Tang Wenye pinched his arm and said fiercely.

  MYvAwn

  Wu Lin tried to pry open his fingers but after several unsuccessful attempts, he had to give up. “We’re in a fantasy world.”

 

  “Fantasy world?” Tang Wenye’s expression relaxed, “What you’re saying is that everything we’re seeing is fake?”

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

  c0TwRl

  “You can say that, but its consequences are still real.”

 

  “Consequences?” Tang Wenye was dumbstruck. “You mean if this ship really sinks, we’ll really die here?”

  CswXpN

  Wu Lin shrugged, “I don’t know how the master of this fantasy world will write the script but according to the original story, the Titanic does indeed sink.”

 

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  “Titanic……” Tang Wenye closed his eyes and tried not to let himself appear too frightened with great effort. “So what you’re saying is, right now we’re in a fantasy world which happens to be the Titanic and if we don’t find a way to escape, we’ll definitely die here?”

  Un9KSi

  “Yes.” Wu Lin nodded with a smile.

 

  “How are you still able to smile!” If it wasn’t because the only person he could rely on was the guy before him, he definitely would have strangled him and thrown the body into the sea to feed the sharks. 

  a5dDgZ

  “Why can’t I smile?” Wu Lin asked. “I’m very happy ah.”

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  “Happy?” Tang Wenye looked at him inconceivably.

  DCN3eQ

  “No matter what the other person’s intention is, I am very grateful to her because she let us be together,” Wu Lin said.

  ……

  No matter what the other’s intention is, he was ready to curse that person to death! 

  kWlduZ

  Tang Wenye calmed himself down and asked, “Alright, so what should we do now?”

 

  “The Titanic had survivors so we can be saved as long as we persevere until the rescue.” Seeing Tang Wenye breath a sigh of relief, Wu Lin added, “That’s if the master of this fantasy world added that setting.”

  kVGxEg

  Tang Wenye’s heart that had just relaxed immediately dropped again, “What do you mean by setting?”

 

  “Like I said, this is just a fantasy world so everything here is fake. It’s just like a fairy tale, the author can change the plot at any time. Except for you and me.” He pointed at him with his finger then pointed at himself. “Because we are real.”

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  OKShv0

  Tang Wenye fumed with gritted teeth, “I would rather be fake right now.”

 

  Wu Lin’s ears moved, “The ship is beginning to sink.”

  7geR1

  Tang Wenye had a headache. “Can’t you say any good news?!”

 

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

  Wu Lin said with a smile, “But we will always be together.”

  al0 if

  “…… You better be quiet!”

  

  The chief officer began directing the sailors to put down the lifeboats. 

  NbAkY7

  Even though Tang Wenye had seen this scene in the movie, it was far less shocking than being on the scene, especially with the deck slowly tilting right under his feet. 

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  “We should get on a lifeboat.” While grabbing onto the railing, he continued, “In any case, they aren’t real people. They won’t die if they fall into the sea……”

  JFXWzP

  “That’s your perception. In their minds, falling into the sea means dying.” Wu Lin pointed in the direction of the lifeboat distribution, “Look, that sailor has a gun in his hand. If you go over there, he will shoot.”

 

  “Will I die?” Tang Wenye asked very seriously.

  45IiCZ

  “You will,” Wu Lin replied back very seriously. 

 

  Tang Wenye cursed in a low voice, then turned and began, “Aren’t you a wizard……” He abruptly stopped what he was saying because he saw Wu Lin leisurely sitting in a bubble, just like that time at the hot spring. 

  zaO0AQ

  Wu Lin saw the soaring anger in his eyes and asked, “Do you want to come in?”

 

  “Did you think I’d say no?” The moment Tang Wenye finished, he found himself involuntarily floating before bumping into the bubble.  

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

  SBVIco

  In order to accommodate two people, the bubble had to double in size. 

 

  Tang Wenye adjusted his posture, trying as much as possible not to let any part of his body come in contact with Wu Lin. 

  UbJWfV

  “Are you sleepy?” Wu Lin saw that his eyelids were slowly drooping down. 

 

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  Tang Wenye closed his eyes and said unhappily, “I’m just imagining that I’m sitting on the sofa at home.”

  OITGs1

  Wu Lin froze, “The sofa in your house is imagined?” Was the director of the company having a high salary just a rumor? Otherwise, how could he be so poor? Even sitting on a sofa must rely on imagination. 

 

  Tang Wenye opened his eyes and stared at him, “Close……” The word ‘mouth’ hadn’t been uttered yet when the bubble flew up like a balloon. 

95lhUC

 

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  “What are you doing?” Tang Wenye grabbed Wu Lin’s calf nervously. 

 

  Wu Lin wanted to shrink back his feet but it only led to a more forceful grip. 8R3jGx

 

  “The ship is sinking.”

 

  Tang Wenye looked back. Sure enough, the hull of the ship was slowly standing erect just as it did in the movie. “Then you should have told me in advance!” He let go of Wu Lin’s leg.  7fV2N

 

  “Didn’t you want me to shut up?” Wu Lin asked innocently.

 

  Tang Wenye turned around to find any hints of teasing in his expression but the facts proved that he was being very serious.  7s5qX

 

  After a while, the ship stood upright, practically perpendicular to the sea. 

 

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  Passengers and sailors alike kept falling off the ship and into the water.  EGOTY

 

  Tang Wenye couldn’t help feeling sympathetic, “Can’t you save them?”

 

  “They aren’t real,” Wu Lin said blankly. 2UHVLT

 

  “But they’re alive in my eyes.” He paused then vexedly pulled his hair, “Damn it, I almost can’t tell the difference between reality and illusion!” 

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

 

  Wu Lin: “Earlier you were saying you wanted to get on a lifeboat.” O45Qq

 

  “Yes!” Tang Wenye changed his tone and said helplessly, “Ok, I admit, I have a selfish side but I also have compassion and a conscience. That so-called peace of mind *jū ān sī wēi, of course people would only consider the situation of others after they have ensured their own safety. Besides, they can’t even count as human!” The more he spoke, the more confused he felt.

  ubNRmo

  Wu Lin’s thoughts, on the hand, was very clear, “Jū ān sī wēi is used like this?”

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

 

  “Words are dead but people are alive. Literature is constantly improving with the trend of the times,” Tang Wenye said. 

  4Kr bi

  Wu Lin appeared enlightened from his words. 

 

  “You understood what I meant?” Tang Wenye was skeptical.

  dLTpEn

  “You are a literary youth,” Wu Lin concluded.

 

  Tang Wenye was speechless and couldn’t speak for a long time. “I didn’t mean that, what I meant was……” He saw the bubble sinking lower and lower, getting closer and closer with the ocean, and couldn’t help feeling alarmed, “What are you going to do?”

  KRCtao

  “Didn’t you want to rescue them?” Wu Lin blinked.

 

  “Why?” Tang Wenye didn’t dare believe it because even he didn’t fully understand what he had said.

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  AICGjQ

  “They may not be real but the tragedy of the Titanic is.” Wu Lin analyzed, “Subconsciously, you hoped to change that ending.”

 

  Tang Wenye was impressed, “Do you know psychology?”

  wA4MOv

  “I don’t.”

 

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  “Then how did you think of that?” Almost made him have a whole new level of respect for him.

  JvYckA

  Wu Lin:“Common sense.”

  ……

  As a result, he only ‘almost’ let him have a whole new level of respect for him.

  nkAEFl

  Tang Wenye looked away.

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Translator's Note


桀桀 – a villain’s laugh, kinda like muahaha

Translator's Note


Calling someone a dou ding (豆丁) is basically calling them a child. In the raws, Wu Lin was called a xiao dou ding (小豆丁) or small child while Tang Wenye was called a da dou ding (大豆丁). Since “da” means big, Tang Wenye was called a big, foolish kid

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8 comments

  1. ​“Then what is your purpose for coming to Earth?” Tang Wenye felt as if he joined the cast of 《The X-Files》.

    WHAHAHAH MALE LEAD THIS ISNT MEN IN BLACK LAH

  2. 😂 this is so good 🤣

    ML’s wondering how he’s offended Wu Lin’s cousin to be targetted, and fearing for his life 🤣

    Wu Lin is so cute~ 💕

    Thank you for translating 💕💕💕

  3. Lmao😂 Wu Lin’s straightforward answers crack me up!

    Thank you so much for the chapter!(๑´>᎑<)~❤