Translator: phizzlepop
Editor: mantou
Ye Ming flipped over. Underneath him was a big, soft bed with a familiar fresh scent, and not that narrow wooden bed at school in a small room that didn’t even have air conditioning. How blissful!
Plus, he didn’t have to work part-time and fight a battle of wits and courage with those bear-children anymore. Thinking of this, Ye Ming was almost moved to tears.
【Ye Ming: I’m finally home. I love my home. My home is the coziest harbor in this world, a safe refuge for wanderers. I’d rather die here than be a child without a home to return to.】
【888: …】mmp
Ye Ming was so hungry his stomach growled, and he sluggishly opened his eyes and shifted a bit. He found himself in Lu Xiuwen’s arms, then struggled to get out.
Lu Xiuwen gently, but firmly, clutched Ye Ming’s wrist. A low voice sounded near his ear, “Don’t move.”
Ye Ming was stunned for a moment, then promptly realized that he seemed to have bumped into something stiff and hard. At this moment, all his memories of being affectionate with Lu Xiuwen rushed into his mind.
Next to him was this person, and the tip of his nose was also filled with his scent. This man once aggressively possessed him, ruthlessly ravaging him…
Ye Ming flushed, but this time it wasn’t wholly out of shyness, but more so outrage and pain. Even now… he was still unable to forget about everything this man had brought to him. He despised himself for being like this, how he couldn’t forget about all of these things.
Ye Ming gritted his teeth and looked at him with red eyes, lips pale.
Lu Xiuwen had to exhaust his strength just to restrain himself from touching Ye Ming. Now looking at his gaze filled with shame, the stifled feeling in his heart was indescribable… He fell silent for a long time, then let go of Ye Ming and walked out.
Ye Ming didn’t think that Lu Xiuwen would actually let go. He was briefly stunned, then put on his slippers and rushed downstairs. He was leaving this place!
But to his surprise, the front door was locked! Even the lock itself had been changed. Ye Ming went around the house and discovered that the doors and windows in the house had all been replaced by Lu Xiuwen. He was actually unable to leave this place!
Ye Ming was so enraged his entire body quivered. What did Lu Xiuwen mean by this, did he want to confine him here?!
At this time, Lu Xiuwen came out of the kitchen carrying breakfast. He looked gently at Ye Ming and said, “Come eat, Xiao Ran.”
Ye Ming slowly turned around to look at him.
How could this man do such a thing and still look so nonchalant? What right did he have to act like before, like nothing had happened, and call him to go over and eat. The familiar scene in front of him stabbed at Ye Ming’s eyes.
We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.
We can never go back, so why can’t you just let me go, why can’t you just let me off!
Tf Zlcu ibbxfv ja tlw jcv rcffgfv. “P’w cba tecugs.”
Oe Wlekfc’r ujhf vjgxfcfv, yea tf delmxis mbcmfjifv la. Lbk mbeiv tf cba yf tecugs? Pa’r qgbyjyis yffc jc fcalgf vjs jcv cluta rlcmf tf ijra jaf, gluta? Lf mifcmtfv tlr olrar, aegcfv, jcv kjixfv abkjgvr Tf Zlcu.
Tf Zlcu atbeuta bo Oe Wlekfc’r jmalbcr ogbw sfrafgvjs jcv klatbea fnfc atlcxlcu, aegcfv jgbecv jcv oifv! Dea, Oe Wlekfc’r wbnfwfcar kfgf ojrafg jcv tf ugjyyfv tlr kjlra, vgjuulcu tlw yjmx! Oe Wlekfc lucbgfv Tf Zlcu rageuuilcu jcv obgmfv tlw ab rla vbkc bc tlr ijq jcv rjlv, “Tbe rtbeiv fja rbwfatlcu, batfgklrf sbeg ybvs kbc’a yf jyif ab rajcv la.”
Ye Ming gnashed his teeth stubbornly, looking as though he wouldn’t eat even he was beaten to death.
Lu Xiuwen stared at him for a while, then sighed almost imperceptibly. He abruptly scooped up some porridge and drank a mouthful, then pinched Ye Ming’s chin with one hand, his fingers exerting some strength and forcing him to open his lips, then lowered his head and moved in with a kiss!
Ye Ming thrashed his legs about, desperately trying to break free from Lu Xiuwen’s hold, but once this man tore away his gentle exterior, his strength was something Ye Ming absolutely couldn’t resist!
The porridge dribbled down the corners of the two people’s lips. Lu Xiuwen didn’t mind and continued to take sips and feed Ye Ming just like this!
Ye Ming was so angry, his face flushed! Breathing rapidly, he realized that he was no match for Lu Xiuwen, and any further resistance would be futile. He finally revealed a look filled with grief and indignation, and said, “Enough! I can eat by myself!”
Lu Xiuwen paused. He dutifully let go of Ye Ming, placed him on the chair next to him, and said softly, “I’ll go get another bowl for you.”
Saying that, he got up and went to the kitchen again to ladle out another serving for Ye Ming. He placed it in front of him, and said with a low, soothing voice, “Eat.”
Ye Ming glared at the bowl in front of him, body trembling, teeth gritted hatefully… he… in the past he actually had some fantasies about this person. The reason he pretended to be so gentle was simply to lull him into a false sense of security, right? Now that he knows that he can’t fool him anymore, he’s finally revealed his true colors, right?
This is what your original appearance is like, isn’t it? Without any consideration for whether I’m in pain or not, whether I’m sad or not, as long as you can control everything…
Once you’re tired of playing this game of tag, you can do whatever you’d like with me anyway, since I can’t escape from the palm of your hand.
Liar. You’re this world’s most despicable and shameless liar.
Ye Ming lowered his head, and in the end, still picked up the spoon, tears falling drop by drop into his bowl.
This used to be his favorite. The chef at home really understood his tastes, so he especially liked to eat at home. But, the things he once liked now only brought him pain, and the things that were left were all just unbearable memories.
Lu Xiuwen saw that Ye Ming was finally eating obediently, and was slightly relieved. However, the depression in his heart didn’t ease a single bit, because Ye Ming was clearly unhappy.
He was crying.
This was the person in his heart that he’d been carefully cherishing for more than ten years. He was reluctant to knock or bump against him even a little bit, but now he was the one who was forcing him, making him distressed.
Lu Xiuwen was tormented. He’d never regretted his own actions this much before.
Lu Xiuwen walked over, lightly stroked Ye Ming’s back, and whispered into his ear, “Sorry, I shouldn’t have deceived you. But, it’s really true that I love you.”
He paused a bit, then added, “As for me liking your mother in the past, I didn’t deliberately hide it from you, I just didn’t think there was any need to tell you. After all, it happened 20 years ago… Maybe at the beginning I adopted you because of her, but after so many years have passed, my feelings for you’ve long had nothing to do with her.”
Ye Ming was held in Lu Xiuwen’s embrace. He didn’t even have the strength to struggle anymore. He’d never hated his own powerlessness this much before.
Because he had no way to resist, he could only stay by this person’s side, and listen to his so-called explanations. He could say whatever he wanted to anyway, all he could do was listen.
Lu Xiuwen hugged Ye Ming, his gaze bitter.
He truly loved this person, but this person wouldn’t believe him. This was probably one of the most powerless things in the world.
Even if he could dig out his own heart, he still wouldn’t be able to prove that his heart really belonged to him. Once trust was lost, once a relationship had cracks in it, then it could never be repaired. Suspicion ultimately ruined everything.
This wasn’t a business competition with a clear winner and loser, nor was it an athletics tournament with rankings. It was even less like a violent battle with the living and the dead.
With feelings… there was no way to obtain a 100% clear result. Once there was a lack of trust, anything more you said or did would be meaningless.
Lu Xiuwen lowered his head, his lips lightly touching the top of Ye Ming’s head. His eyes were filled with unprecedented sorrow and helplessness. What should I do? How can I make you believe that I love you?
………………
Apart from not letting Ye Ming go outside, Lu Xiuwen meticulously took care of everything else no matter what it was. Moreover, the way he did things was very careful and attentive. Occasionally when he couldn’t stay at home to accompany Ye Ming, he would let the nanny look after him, not allowing Ye Ming to stay at home by himself in case an accident happened.
Ye Ming’s scope of movement was limited to these few floors, and everywhere there were signs of Lu Xiuwen’s presence.
This was his home, and everywhere there were his beautiful memories. He was an orphan, but he hadn’t landed in an orphanage, nor had he tasted the bitterness of the real world. He lived with the warm Lu family, where someone wholeheartedly treated him well, not allowing him to feel even the tiniest bit wronged. Compared to many children with parents, he was probably still much happier.
He used to be grateful to the heavens, grateful for everything he had.
But now everything had changed tastes.
Whenever Lu Xiuwen looked at him tenderly, he’d wonder who it was Lu Xiuwen actually wanted to see. Whenever Lu Xiuwen patiently took care of him, he’d wonder who it was Lu Xiuwen was actually thinking about.
And whenever Lu Xiuwen got on top of him and pressed him down under his body, who exactly was it that he was thinking about then?
One day, when Lu Xiuwen came back from a meeting, he found that Ye Ming wasn’t in the living room, while the nanny was cautiously standing on the second floor, giving Lu Xiuwen a significant look.
Lu Xiuwen immediately realized that Ye Ming was probably in the study. He walked up and saw Ye Ming standing in front of his desk with a photo in his hand.
This was a photo Lu Xiuwen had put in his study. The photo had the whole family in it. A young Lu Xiuwen stood right beside Gu Xueya with a bright smile. This was an old photo from 20 years ago that had always been placed inside his glass bookcase.
Actually, there wasn’t only this photo in the bookcase, and there were even more photos of him and Ye Ming later on. There was a small Ye Ming, a grown-up Ye Ming, a junior high school and then high school Ye Ming… there were photos of them separately, and photos of them together. Although there were also photos of Gu Xueya, they actually didn’t account for much.
Normally, this wouldn’t be a big deal, but right now Lu Xiuwen was keenly aware that he shouldn’t let Ye Ming look at them. He walked over and said softly, “What’re you looking at?”
Ye Ming looked at Gu Xueya in the photo, somewhat absent-minded. This was his mother. He actually didn’t remember her anymore. After all, when she passed away, he’d still been very young.
Lu Xiuwen’s existence made up for the things he’d lost, replaced his parents, and even later in his life, it was all Lu Xiuwen…
Ye Ming slowly raised his head, his expression mild for once. His gaze didn’t carry thorns, his voice wasn’t filled with ice, and instead he said smoothly, “I’m looking at my mother.”
Deeply afraid Ye Ming would start thinking of those things again, Lu Xiuwen took away the photo in his hand, grasped his hand, and said, “Look at it some other time then. Let’s go down first.”
Ye Ming said, “Wait.”
Lu Xiuwen’s gaze slightly sank, and he tentatively asked, “What is it?”
Ye Ming stared at Lu Xiuwen’s face, then suddenly revealed a nostalgic gaze, his lips moving slightly, “Uncle, I care about you very much, you know that, right?”
Lu Xiuwen was silent for a while, then nodded.
Ye Ming then smiled, this expression carrying a nearly indiscernible bitterness. “Then how much I love you, do you know?”
When Lu Xiuwen heard these words, his heart palpitated. Even his heartbeat seemed to stall for a moment.
He never imagined that he would still be able hear the word ‘love’ come from Ye Ming’s mouth. For him this word was already a luxury.
“I feel like you already know.” Ye Ming lowered his eyes, his voice soft, “After all, you know all kinds of things, unlike me, who doesn’t know anything…”
Lu Xiuwen’s voice was hoarse, “I…”
Ye Ming didn’t wait for him to finish and suddenly lifted the corners of his lips to smile at him, his voice light, “But, how much I loved you before is how much I hate you now.”
In his dark eyes was a gleam of indifference, the slight opening and closing of his lips forming the same exact words they did in a previous life, appearing ruthless, callous.
He said, “You make me feel disgusted.”
The translator has something to say: Σ(‘◉⌓◉’) 555, Ye Ming-gege‘s nuclear warhead barrage has come online.
Time for the gong abuse?
Thanks for the chapter
Thanks for reading! Ye Ming-gege really dropped him that line (=ↀωↀ=)
Gong abuse! Gong Abuse! Let the master show you what true abuse is like ↜(۳｀∇´)۳ ψ
Thank you for the chappie! (❁´3`❁) ♡
Thanks for reading! Ye Ming-gege takes the reins once again~ ☆:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:☆
Wait, why do I feel like I’ve heard that line before many times already?
” But, how much I loved you before is how much I hate you now.”
Was it from this novel or from another novel, it sounds like a famous line at this point.
Thanks for the chapter! 😘
I think it’s a line from the first arc, not sure bout that, and this line’s pretty common in a lot of novels
Thanks for reading! ʕ￫ᴥ￩ʔ
If I remember correctly, Arc 1 of both SSSG and SCSG (the prequel) have the most similar concepts, but the thoughts were from the ML’s POV instead of the MC. I think in the author’s notes she also comments on the dichotomy of love and hate a few times too.
I know for sure this line (or something super similar) was in SCSG, in the father-fake son arc before he threw himself from the bridge.
Exactly what I thought when I read that too!
I feel teary and also very much excited for the upcoming abuse 😂😂😂
Thanks for the chapter <3
Thanks for reading!
Ye Ming-gege always brings us all kinds of mixed feelings. (o˘◡˘o)
WOW cabin attendant phizzlepop how did you know that I wanted this exact sidedish of despair and abuse????? Thank you, lovely person. Amazing, Ye Ming’s operations continue to astound. What poetic timing!! Show LXW that he brought about his own bad end!
Thanks for reading, passenger trippuchi! Our conductor Ye Ming-gege carefully prepared this special menu beforehand, and the rest of this full-course meal that’s sure to be a… roller-coaster of a gustatory delight awaits. (♡˙︶˙♡)
Thanks for your hard work!
Whew 😥, that was a tough chapter. Ye Ming is a top notch actor!
Thanks! Ye Ming-gege is ready to take home all the film emperor awards (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)
Eeee so excited this is back! 🥰
same! same! 🤩
excited to be continuing translations for this lovely piece~
thanks for reading! ₍₍◝(°꒳°*)◜₎₎
HAHAHAHAHA BYE BYE NOW ITS TIME FOR THE GONG ABUSE MWUAHAHAHAHAH
AFTER CRYING 3_3 SO HARD, I JUST REALIZED I LOVE ANGST!!!
THANK YOUUUUUU SSOOOOO SOOOOO SOOOOO SOOOOO SOOOOO MUCH FOR TRANSLATING PHIZZLEPOP!!!!!!!!!! 😉~💞
thanks for reading, glad you’re enjoying it! let’s go forth and cultivate our tear duct strength together (｡╥︿╥｡)
Now I remember! Gosh reading to much jumbled my brains data 😂
there are so many QT worlds and arcs around haha (⌒▽⌒)☆
En, this is the gong abuse I want! I feel so darn satisfied!
hahahaha, Ye Ming-gege pulling out old lines for a double whammy is an entire mood
I must say that Ye Ming daren using lines from previous ML’s thoughts to go against Lu Xiuwen this time makes me think that he’s acting like he ‘blackened’ and… I Love it!!!
I also thought that Gu Ran ‘blackening’ is the best way to go about Lu Xiuwen’s deception but Ye Ming daren really did well in this gong abuse- * swoons *
Ye Ming-gege’s ability to unfailingly make ppl rue the very day they were born is astounding and i am so 👏 here 👏 for 👏 it 👏