My Underachieving Seatmate Doesn't Need Any ComfortingChapter 56

Song Yixu was essentially a reincarnation of a silly husky. This was something Tang Yu considered when he assigned him a seat in front of He Shen.

Tonight, he had been afraid of Lou Xiao at the beginning, but after playing for so long, he was no longer so terrified. 14Lk3y

When He Shen had sent him this provocation, his true nature was exposed.

Song Yixu said, “Shen Ge, can you change the task? I don’t want to kiss a guy!” With that said, he also glanced at Jie Kai, held his nose and said, “Especially not this stinky ~ guy!”

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

All the guys present: “………”

When Poop-faced Song committed this blunder, the mood changed. KpSLcd

What He Shen said was logical. “If you liked kissing, I wouldn’t have set it as a task.”

“Ah,” Song Yixu fell to the ground. “I am dead.”

He Shen said, “Do you need Jie Kai to kiss you?”

“No!” Song Yi sat upright, horrified. “I’m alive, I can live another 500 years.”

etc4Yj

Qiao Shao was thoroughly amused by this living treasure, and he followed He Shen’s statement with, “Since you’re alive, hurry and do your dare.”

Finally, someone who knew how this game should be played!  This task was interesting. Those tasks before like changing seats and standing up and sitting down — just what kind of game was that!

Song Yixu and Jie Kai were your typical staunch straight men. Only when it can be used to coax the girls and make them happy, will they hug and embrace their brothers. In particular, the two girls they secretly liked had this special interest. In order to get them to pay any attention to themselves, they would stake their all every day.

That He Shen had looked to them to perform this operation was just perfect, it couldn’t be more natural. PAwM 5

Song ‘silly husky’ Yixu was naturally dramatic, with pouted lips, he moved closer to Jie Kai and said, “Kaizi, a kiss from this uncle, can guarantee that you’d meet with something good when you walk out that door.”

Jie Kai scolded him: “Oh, f*ck it. But with you showering me with saliva like that, all I’m gonna meet when I go through that door is a car — a car accident.”

Song Yixu said, “Don’t say that! If you died, wouldn’t I be guilty of the most heinous crime?” zs7Zkj

Jie Kai knew him too well. “Yes, it would be your fault! You would have kissed me to death!”

Qiao Shao was thoroughly amused. “You two, stop with all the chatting! Hurry up.”

Song Yixu planted a loud smacking kiss on Jie Kai’s left cheek.

Jie Kai pushed him away without a single trace of politeness. “I’m going to have to give my face a thorough washing tonight.” lCiIRn

Now that Song Yixu had kissed him, his unrestrained manner rose another notch. He said, “Look at him, look at the face of this slag man!”

Wei Jiayu, who sat across from him: “…” Any more and this pitiful rich second generation will turn homophobic!

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Qiao Shao also admired Song Yixu. He said: “I’m not so sure he’s the slag here. Song Yixu, you really do joke around a lot.”

Song Yixu affected a come hither stare at Qiao Shao. senOVt

Qiao Shao got goosebumps all over!

Seeing that the dare had been completed and the mood had also turned quite good, He Shen continued to deal the cards.

What shocked everyone was that the way the cards were arranged for the next round, it was as if the cards had eyes! This had clearly been arranged.

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

Pc atf cfza gbecv, Lf Vtfc tjv atf jmf, jcv Alf Bjl tjv atf pbxfg. eEqFx0

Lf Vtfc: “P’ii ulnf sbe j mtjcmf obg gfnfcuf.”

Alf Bjl megrfv rlifcais.

Vbcu Tlze mglfv bea, “Rbbbb!”

Lf Vtfc tjr jigfjvs lrrefv atf ajrx. “Alf Bjl, xlrr tlw yjmx.” 8gtd6W

Ktfgfeqbc……

Pa kjr Vbcu Tlze’r aegc ab rff j “mjg” jr tf ifoa atgbeut atf vbbg.

This way, the game really was much more interesting, suspenseful and stimulating.

Lou Xiao didn’t say a word. He stood by, watching critically, waiting to see what the old beast would do. J1Fv8j

Wei Jiayu also had a vague understanding, and was very panicky.

It’s over! It’s over! Qiao Shao will definitely be kissed. As for who he’ll be kissed by…

No matter who it was, the other one will blow up! Can this tiny dormitory building bear the thunder of these two people?

He Shen got the trump card for three consecutive rounds, and he became the Magistrate Qiao arbitrarily matching couples. hfL4QY

Song Yixu was really miserable. He got the joker card twice. After kissing Jie Kai, he also had to kiss Chen Su.

Chen Su was now quite familiar with him and could now even crack a joke. “Like this, I guess you could already be considered as a watery poplar blossom.”

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

Song Yixu sobbed, crying two streams of tears.

Qiao Shao was happily watching all the excitement, but he was also very puzzled. “How come you always get the ace?” cKOMed

He Shen said, “Guess I’m just lucky.”

The school tyrant continued to exude a frosty aura.

Wei Jiayu finally got it. The god of learning was cheating!

Even though it was the back of the card, there were still be subtle differences. Would these details that ordinary people couldn’t remember be of any challenge to the god of learning? izw4C7

Especially, Shen Ge who has this superhuman memory!

Because he had the trump card, it was his job to deal the cards. Although he would shuffle the cards after every round, so long as he knew which card was which, he could still draw the ace card for himself.

The god of learning had invested so much thought into this, what was he scheming?

Wei Jiayu looked at Qiao Shao. He was affixing it with a stamp: drink of misfortune! OSFLdA

Finally it was Qiao Shao’s turn.

Qiao Shao opened the card and was still quite excited. “I got the joker card!”

He’d watched the fun for a while now and wanted to participate.

At this point, the others hadn’t opened their cards yet. Qiao Shao looked to He Shen, “Don’t you have the ace again?” Y9pR8b

He Shen opened the card.

Sure enough, he had the ace again!

Qiao Shao was convinced. “This luck of yours is really through the roof!”

He’s was seated right next to He Shen, and he was pretty sure that this guy shuffled the cards very carefully. He definitely didn’t peek at the cards. There was no way he could have cheated. AseTPb

Besides, there wasn’t any benefit to cheating in this kind of game between friends.

He Shen curved his lips in a smile. “Which will it be?”

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“Of course, a dare,” Qiao Shao looked at him impatiently. “Who do you want me to kiss?”

Don’t blame him for asking. He Shen has played the past three rounds in this way. Thinking he would do the same for the fourth round was just normal. JoMxa

Wei Jiayu was quickly going crazy!

Is the amount of enmity this drink of misfortune has amassed not enough?

Who knew that He Shen would unexpectedly ask Qiao Shao in reply, “Who do you want to kiss?”

Wei Jiayu: “!!!” He has a bad heart, he was quickly running out of breath! dklpK5

Fortunately, Qiao Shao didn’t answer this deadly question. He answered smartly, “You have the ace card. You’re the one who gets to assign the task.”

Wei Jiayu breathed a sigh of relief — as expected from a drink of misfortune, very…professional.

He Shen said, “Actually, it’s not very interesting to always kiss others.”

Wei Jiayu revived a bit. Don’t tell me, they were actually going to get out of this alive? 4VItiC

Lou Xiao also raised his eyebrows. He didn’t believe that this old beast would let free a duck he had by the beak.

Qiao Shao said, “That’s true. It’s not anything new anymore, is it? So what task are you assigning instead?”

He Shen said: “So, you won’t kiss somebody else, you’ll kiss me instead.”

Wei Jiayu was beaten back to his original state: “………” bfQIAq

Lou Xiao’s dead-eyed stare went online: sure enough.

Qiao Shao was surprised. “Didn’t you say it wouldn’t be kissing anymore?”

He Shen said, “During the previous rounds, the joker kissed others with an empty card. This round is different, you’ll have to kiss the one with the ace.”

Oh, how different! The difference in that was so big it left people completely flabbergasted! FISycx

Qiao Shao said, “I thought …”

“What?” He Shen looked at him. “Too embarrassing?”

Chrysanthemum Garden.

“What’s so embarrassing about this?” Qiao Shao approached him and kissed him on the cheek.

He Shen: “…” Ut60zy

Wei Jiayu: “!”

Lou Xiao breathed a sigh of relief: okay, fortunately, it wasn’t a French kiss.

He Shen stopped for a good long while. He then said softly, “Wait.”

Qiao Shao: “Huh?” NrDXEx

He Shen suddenly leaned in close…

Qiao Shao blinked: “Wha…”

Then suddenly, the entire room turned bright. The incandescent lights flooded the room with white light.

There even came some regretful groans from the students. “That was fast…didn’t we agree that this would be at least three hours!” mLYW8J

Yes, the power was back. And thus their wonderful blackout night came to an end.

However, in room 516, there wasn’t a single sound. It was as though they were frozen in place. No one dared to even blink.

Their god of learning, the legend of East High, the man who single-handedly raised the entire school’s grades, held the back of his seatmate’s head and planted a kiss on his forehead.

This scene produced an indescribable sense of harmony. vbD9Cj

Making everyone present feel as though they couldn’t bear to interrupt them.

Qiao Shao too was completely muddled. He felt He Shen’s hands, felt his dry lips, felt as if that spot on his forehead had been branded, leaving behind a mark that went through to his heart.

At this time he heard He Shen say, “I’m not Jie Kai.”

Qiao Shao stared blankly. Sl9YL1

He Shen finished his words. “If you’re kissed, you should kiss back. That way you won’t be a slag man.”

Qiao Shao reacted half a beat late…

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Song Yixu kissed Jie Kai before, and after Jie Kai wanted to wash his face 800 times. Song “the great actor” Yixu accused him of being a slag man.

So He Shen returned the kiss? nmrTMX

This reasoning was not far-fetched at all! Not at all…!

Qiao Shao pushed him away: “Wh- what kind of nonsense is that!”

Faced with this scene and situation, Wei Jiayu had given up struggling.

What else could he do? The end of the world was determined to come. What could one insignificant little Blue Hair do? c0 muF

Lou Xiao suddenly stood up, as if confirming what he thought.

Wei Jiayu didn’t dare to look at his poor Xiao Ge.

Lou Xiao: “Since the power’s back, let’s end the game here.”

No one objected. OnWmz3

When Lou Xiao was about to go out, he said, “Lao He, come with me.”

He Shen really needed to go out and calm down. He answered, “En.”

They both left the room together, Wei Jiayu collapsed on the chair, his face completely ashen —

It’s over, it’s completely over. fdy3r9

No doubt about it. Those two big shots were going to have it out!

————->>>>>>
Here’s a brief summary of Magistrate Qiao’s story.
There are six young people who are supposed to get married. Girl A, Girl B, Girl C, Boy A, Boy B, and Boy D
Girl A and Boy A are siblings. Girl B and Boy B are siblings. Originally, this is how they were supposed to get married:
Boy A — Girl B
Boy B — Girl C
Boy D — Girl A
But because Boy A got sick before the wedding day, his family sent his sister, Girl A in disguise to the ceremony. Boy B was sent by his mother also in disguise to the ceremony because she had caught wind that Boy A was sick and she didn’t want her daughter to become a widow and ruin her reputation in case he up and dies.
Girl A and Boy B get married. Family A, thinking they had gotten a daughter in law, sent Girl A to keep her company. So, Girl A and Boy B end up discovering they were both in disguise, and end up having sex and getting Girl A pregnant (all in a single night!).
It becomes a huge scandal and Magistrate Qiao steps in. He rules that this is now how they’ll be married:
Boy A — Girl B
Boy B — Girl A
Boy D — Girl C
This was supposedly a very wise decision, but this story really didn’t age well, since 1. they’re basically forced marriages and 2. Girl C was like 15 years old.

Translator's Note


Jokester

Translator's Note


It’s like saying, “hey there, handsome”

Translator's Note


It’s underlying meaning is to meet with good fortune.

Translator's Note


A car is brought up because ‘something good when you walk out the door’ was something that a Chinese car brand had used in one of its advertisements.

These China-specific jokes are gonna be the death of me (T^T)

Translator's Note


This comes from a really messed up folk story. If you want a brief summary, check the end of the chapter.

Translator's Note


A fickle woman

Leave a Comment

28 comments

  1. Qiao Shao so decisive! Go you … He Shen.exe stopped again for a while there … hehehe ♥

  2. Wei Jiayu had a vague understanding, and was very panicky*

    Yup, that about sums him up X’3 bless him he tries…..

  3. I wonder what goes through his mind (▰˘◡˘▰)Σ he’s seriously worried about them 😂 what would his reaction be, once he finds out?

  4. Baby Shao cutely asking boi Shen who he has to kiss~ uwu

    Omg someone needs to check blue hair’s blood pressure…Thanks for the chapter~ ( ^ ♡ ^ )/

  5. Thank you for the update!

    He Shen is really quite ahead of himself.

    He’s not even sure if Qiao Shao like him yet.

    Guess God of Learning also has his shortcomings.

  6. “However, in room 516, there wasn’t a single sound. It was as though they were frozen in place. No one dared to even blink.

    Their god of learning, the legend of East High, the man who single-handedly raised the entire school’s grades, held the back of his seatmate’s head and planted a kiss on his FOREHEAD.”Not gonna lie, they got us in the first half

  7. Regarding Magistrate Qiao story;

    If it happened long time ago (say 50years back), then it’s common for people get married really young. Both my grandmas get married once they get their period (12-13 yo). And both my grandpas are young too (15-16yo). Coincidentally both my grandmas are same age and went to the same schools. And so did my grandpas too as they are both classmates as well and older by 3years from their own spouses. ^^

    And back then people get married by arrangement of their elders.

    • So true, it’s normal to get married early back then like how it is normal now that you can only get married at the age of 18 so it’s not concerning actually

  8. i am: stuffed with dog food

    i am: drowning in meng

    i: wasn’t ready AWRPWJDONAODNAPSBspsnaodn

    forehead kisses + lucky ones as a bg = destroying my heart rate fck

  9. Wei Jiayu is the best. that’s it. that’s all.

    I honestly can say I have never laughed this hard from a novel that there are literal tears. My God, his misunderstanding is gold tier. I was struggling to breathe. I simply love this, it’s really too fun!

  10. I really thought he’s gonna kiss him on th lips heheh and blue hair sure has only few lives to live hahah