Holding Onto My ManChapter 75

 

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Translator's Note

Elestrea: like, the tension is getting higher and higher and finally it’s going in public view

Translator's Note

referring to Su Yu

Translator's Note

Elestrea: talking about their swapping identities

Translator's Note

Elestrea: 死者为大 – a saying which means do not resent the dead, usually said during funeral

Translator's Note

referring to the brothel or nightclub mentioned in Su Yu’s memories

Translator's Note

referring to Su Yu

Translator's Note

referring to Su Yu

Translator's Note

referring to Shen Muze

Leave a Comment

63 comments

  1. At least shen muze got what was coming to him. I feel so bad for the original. He just wanted to be loved.

    Thanks for the chapter ♥️♥️♥️

  2. I always find myself thinking that these people really don’t know what it means to be a “saint”. I often find this word in chinese novels. “He wasn’t a saint, he was a teenager”, okay, and? Does it mean that every teenager in the world is possessed by the devil until adulthood? Does it mean that because you’re no saint, you’re allowed to do everything you like to ruin a person? Sometimes, there’s no need to be a saint to solve a situation, just a decent person. If Shen Muze and the original host were a bit more decent, there would have been no need to arrive to that tragic ending, and if that idiot father had taken his head out of his a** he could have tried to mediate between them and resolve their misunderstandings. Forgiving is not something that only a saint can do, but it takes strenght of character and so everyone’d rather fu*k each other up.

    Not that I don’t enjoy the fu*king…

    But I see that morality is vastly underrated, and it saddens me sometimes.

    • I’m not opposing what you say but let me explain more about what most Chinese authors mean by ‘saint’. Actually Chinese believe in something more like there are ‘saints’ and normal people. These ‘saints’ would be zen and would forgive everyone. This is because of Taoism and Buddhism which has had a large influence in Chinese culture. In order to reach ‘nirvana’ monks must be saintly and not be affected by the emotions of normal people. But normal people are secular, ie they have wants and desires, they would get vengeance. So that’s why.

    • I don’t find the conflict between Shen Muze and Su Yu very compelling since it could have been resolved with very little effort. I’m kind of glad they didn’t reveal it until the end since it would’ve made this arc very different had Gu Bai already known what the original host’s wish was.

      I feel like rebirth revenge plots are pretty common in the Chinese novels I’ve seen translated, and yet I can’t stop reading them even though I don’t really agree with completely ruining your “nemesis’s” life. I think the only time I don’t mind is when the other character is completely irredeemable. The second they show regret, I feel a little sad for them. I guess I’ll imagine another rebirth story for them. 😂

      • Oops, meant to make this a comment to the chapter… Everyone is drawn to kiraretts in some way!

    • I agree. He described Su Yu as pure, but if he was really pure he would have realized that Shen Muze only wanted to be love…JUST LIKE HIM. Would have been better to forgive him. In the original, SY killed off SM. Then SM set up SY to be killed off. Sounds like karma to me. One good heart to heart talk could have probably solved the whole mess…sigh…

      • I think Bai saying SY the pure one meaning SY purer than SMZ. He is so pure that when he thought he is picked son, he had to please others due to his dirty past. When he know the truth of swapped identity, he should be able to bid time gaining natural love but the willful ex young master still think SY undeserving and thief. It resonate in his past as a thief which makes him conflicted and they quarrel more which ultimately SM died and like usual human lenient to sympathized with the dead and blamed the living. SY should still had the right as Shen Young Master but he is forever trapped with thinking himself as dirty due to his past. Bai, the outsider saw this as purer since he is innocent where his swapped incident let him suffer the worst fate ever as blue blood yet before he can settle it with the fake, the fake still as willful as ever (as seen after rebirth) died and the dad that knows of his past (as prostitute) had easily labelled him as shameful and nasty deep inside. His fate as prostitute was largely related with the father fault since he is a baby yet it seems that is easily forgotten. Near death, SY even thought the life at brothel is better meaning SY that didn’t learn to be resentful and avengeful is better than the him that is now a ghost fill with unwillingness (for me this is his purest time which Shen Muze never had). Seeing rebirth Muze, I really think SY had better heart. He never wished Muze death ever.
    • Right? As much as I enjoy these webnovels, as an avid reader across the different forms of English, Korean, Japanese and chinese literature, I was initially stunned over the cruel “punishments” that the authors casually dealt out in Chinese webnovels e.g using rape to show karma, disfiguring people etc. Which is why I prefer milder novels preferably with protagonists that know better than to take it too far.

          • I also tend to shy away from such excessive displays of cruelty some authors parade as “justice”. And when the original host was called pure, I couldn’t help shaking my head in wonder – since when are envious and small-minded characters “pure”? There’re no innocents in this arc.

            Oh well, it’s never late to drop a novel…

          • That’s what I’m saying too! Su Yu was definitely not an innocent party in this situation. I look forward to the next arc, tho. There is still time to drop the novel… but it’s definitely not now!

        • Bro what can Gu Bai do? It’s his task. If he can’t complete it, he’ll die. And seriously I can’t dissuade the matter that how cruel the Orginal’s life was and how stupid and infuriating SZ was. I mean bro it”s completely clear that SY was the real son so what’s wrong with sharing. He wasn’t taking your boyfriend or anything. This things you made in your mind and destroyed your life with your own hand. I think like Gu Bai stated both of them are stupid and truly at fault

    • In a sense you can say it like that.

      I suppose Ye Cang used Xiao Li’s body when dealing with the injured beast and that silly ‘immortal’ and after that he should have taken away Xiao Li’s soul, for… reasons.. I don’t know.

      Because based on the ML inside the worlds, they wouldn’t leave MC’s side willingly.. like.. NEVER EVER.. ML is just too possessive 😀

  3. Hah. SMZ got what he deserved. Poor Su Yu. He was the one whi should receive the love, but just because SMZ is the protagonist… ai. This is why i like Quick Ttansmigration novels. The MC transmigrators do justice for the wronged cannon fodders like Su Yu.

  4. I thought that GB would end the apocalypse or smth… (or maybe he will next chapter idk)

    So much stupid… I got a bit dizzy…

    One more chap to end this arc and then on to the next one~ will there be more op GB? Will there be fluff??? Will the secret about hubby (ml) finally be revealed???

    Thanks for the chapter~ ( ^ ♡ ^ )/

  5. What a tiring Shen Muze. Glad Su Yu remained Su Yu and didn’t become Shen Yu

  6. Thanks for the chapter! Wow, it’s either all or nothing in this arc’s storyline… meanwhile, I hope the next chapter clears up what the heck caused this apocalypse, because I thought freeing the beast would stop the demonic influence?

  7. Thanks for the chapter!!

    Am I the only one who felt that the ending was abrupt and maybe a bit rushed? Haaa~ I really had a lot of hope for this arc to continue with tomfoolery and fluffiness but alas we can’t always have what we want. Onwards to the next arc!!

  8. Wow. So in the end, the dad lost both sons. It sounds like both the host and the “protagonist” could have really used some communication skills before.

  9. La vida del original fue lamentable.

    Logró una familia, pero los celos de la otra parte lo llevó a sentirse inferior, sinceramente, creo que sí se oscureció, se oscureció al odiar al otro y en su deseo final de vida.

    En cuanto a SM, en verdad era un niño mimado idiota, que en su primera vida pensó que había perdido todo, solo para perderlo todo en esta vida. Ese, chico solo fue un mimado, no malo, mi bueno… al menos en su primera vida, pero en esta se oscureció.

    Lo único que lamento, es que nuestro ML no estuvo todo este tiempo con nuestro MC. Además, sí ya no existia ese Qi demoniaco ¿por qué continuó el apocalipsis zombi?

  10. I’m not satisfied with the ending at all. I mean at the start I actually didnt like this arc that much since I thought dear MC would suffer a lot but then he proved me just how clever he was, making me like him more and more. And of course, I’m sure I’m not the only one who hates shen muze and feels very sad for the original owner. I’m angry at the father too. Come on, fine, it’s obvious that you would feel affection for a child you raised and thought yours, but you can’t just stay neutral when your sons are fighting and don’t fuck!ng tell me that he never realised their feud. Plus, shen muze’s death is all on him. He really is that stupid, who goes out and run aways when there is an APOCALYPSE outside smh, so d*amn stupid. And ok, while you shouldn’t disrespect the dead, that does not absolutely mean that you can just become blind for their faults. The original owner was not the one who caused his death, played a small part on it maybe, just like every other that stood to the side pretending to be blind to their hostility or didnt teach that stupid brat anything cuz they spoil him too much. Shen Muze didnt suffer enough for me.
  11. Aww mann. I’m kind of disappointed. The start of this arc was so damn good it hyped me up, but it started to go downhill at the point where it was revealed a creature not related to this world was the cause of the apocalypse.

    Idk, I just thought there could be a better way to assimilate the overall story into the arcs. I was looking forward to more fights, badass scenes, and the interactions between MC and ML. But the ML just poof. Urghhh. I can’t even imagine how lonely Gu Bai was spending the remaining years alone, and can’t even leave when he wanted to because of his task.

    😭😭😭

  12. So, in this arc the ML didnt do ‘papapa’ thing ?

  13. I am confused. Earlier in the arc it said that Su Yu’s feelings towards Shen Muze were complicated but there was very little hatred. But this”He hated Shen Muze, but he didn’t want Shen Muze to die as easily as he did in his previous life. He wanted Shen Muze to truly lose Shen Guohui’s affection and love for him, as well as Wu Donghan’s fondness for him, and to enjoy the same pain and suffering he once did!” Seems to contradict all of that. From his wish alone it seems like he hates Shen Muze a lot. So, why were his feelings so complicated when Gu Bai didn’t have the plot???

  14. Ngl I cant really hate/feel sorry towards both Su Yu and Shen Muze cause I always keep in mind that both are 16 y/o, yes that doesn’t mean they are free of guilt BUT they’re still teenagers futhermore both have their own insecurities towards the sudden change/reveal so to me it’s normal to feel hate/threaten/inferior/envious. The character that kinda ticked me off is the father like he’s the adult here, he should’ve known better than to expect these children to overcome their adversaries on their own.He should be the middleman between these two but no all I see is him being on the sideline. Yes it’s not 100% his fault but the way he handle things was pretty ignorant and tbh this whole arc feels underwhelming idk like the whole conflict wasn’t really something that was irreversible and just the setting of this is bland too so this probably one of my least favourite arc
    • Though I guess the only significant of this arc is Gu Bai realising his man identity as the “mysterious master” and also more exposure to Gu Bai and Ye Chan(is this his name i forgot lmao) identity. Others mentioned the abrupt ending and I have to agree it feels pretty rush like the author just want Gu Bai to go back to the starry space lol

  15. i feel bad for Su Yu, he was clearly the one who was wronged when he was scammed into prostituting himself but he still regarded himself as someone dirty, that inferiority complex of his hindered so much in his happiness. im also frustrated with Shen Muze, he’s the typical privileged young master who has a severe victim-complex, im glad he realized his wrong but it still can’t stop me from not accepting him :// I’ve met a lot of people like him and I’m really not good with handling such people.

  16. I feel bad for both parties honestly especially the og host. Insecurity played the biggest role in both their sad stories. 😞

  17. I see many people were saying Shen Muze deserved it but in my opinion I have mixed feelings. Both SMZ and SL were suffering from inferiority complex. So for whatever happened in past life and current life, both are not to be blamed yet bear the sin at the same time. In the end, it felt like SY chose to become willful just like the past SMZ. I’m not saying SMZ was right. But SY was not a complete saint either. If only he could forgive him, I believe they could become good friends. Now both end up suffering what’s the point? Again my opinion.

  18. I really can’t dismiss this whole thing as ‘stupid’ (besides the word being ableist). These are quite heavy grievances that all happened to teenagers who needed some direction in their lives. I really blame the adults around them. They had the duty of reassuring both of the teenagers they’re both loved. The dad and the adopted son should have spotted some clues from them. They really couldn’t have been that blind. Especially since SY was brought back before the chaos of apocalypse.

    What’s worse is that these misunderstandings are actually very common in real life. Parents dying and children ending up with relatives. Those relatives are usually those who already have children themselves so they’re softer. Then their own children feel excluded bc their parents are trying to help the other child get over the loss of his parents but forget to reassure their own child is still loved and have a down to earth talk with them, however young they might be, and explain their behaviour.

    Anyway. Communication is very much needed in these situations. Communication is very important when dealing with people and especially so in case of children/teenagers. Teenagers especially tend to let their imagination run wild and suffer terribly from it.

    • Ah, that being said, the father and adopted son aren’t really the only ones at fault. SMZ was way too spoiled. To even go as far as run away from home in the middle of a f* apocalypse! His original death was very much deserved. And to say that SY robbed him of what was his?! Child, you’re the one who isn’t blood related. Going off in that direction makes you the one who robbed SY (even though I don’t think any of them are at fault for what happened when they were babies).

      But wtf you doing father Shen and adopted bro being angry with SY for your willful young master’s run away stunt?! He used his own two legs to go away. Didn’t seem that SY pushed him out or anything of the sort. At the end of the day, you’re projecting your guilt for spoiling SMZ onto SY. Shame on you, two grown-ups acting as children.

      There are really a lot of complaints I have about the three – SGH, SMZ and that Wu. As for SY, he’s really pitiful. And, as GB said, he had a very pure and childish heart. All he wanted was what we all want – stability, love protection warmth, not being judged. But received exactly the opposite. And to all those who keep saying he was already 16, all I have to say is ‘he is a child at 16!’. I feel like most people are children before they reach their late 20s. And I also feel for all teenagers who have to struggle so much with their moods whilst dealing with life in general. Really, being a teenager is harsh. I’d say is the worst time of a person’s life. With all the hormones going rampant.

  19. su yu & muze both r stupid childrens with inferiority complex and fear which caused this disaster and suyu isn’t that good boy he also want muze to suffer the same as him it was thei father fault he didn’t do anything to stop their fight as well he left them when they commit mistake he should be the one to feel guilty they r just teenagers who fought over for his favour

  20. I feel so sad… It’s okay Muze, even if the whole world hate you, I still love you very much💕

  21. both SY and SMZ aren’t wrong. they’re just pitiful children afraid of abandonment. idk how y’all can hate any of them. SY is cold asf tho 💀

  22. I don’t like people like that.

    Like how dare they have the guts to pretend to be pitiful when they’re actually not? I’m so angry I’m crying.

  23. I don’t agree with Bai. I think the adopted brother and Father are stupid and useless, if they just tried to solve the misunderstandings it would have been enough. They raised sz like that and they should have corrected him instead of biasing one another and discarding him.

    SY is suffering from inferiority and SZ is like a lost puppy trying to mark his territory.

    They are just teenagers who are just looking for affection, where are those elder ones when one needed them to depend on? Fake family.

  24. Really mixed feelings about the ending of this arc. I get it that some authors tend to really put their MC and ML on a high pedestal and everything they do will always be right but Gu Bai’s take on this task makes me a bit sad and irked. So SY can be the victim but SMZ who is also a teen, doesn’t deserve to be pitied and understood? This isn’t the kind of atonement I seek from him. Overall, his ending left a really bad taste in my mouth…. It would be better if he didn’t feel any remorse after what he did to SY but he had actually felt guilty and even tried to remedy the situation. The poor kid was just scared of losing his family…. Definitely didn’t deserve such a cruel ending