Desharow MermanChapter 58

Translator: Jade

Editor: Cheonsa, Notthepineapple V16uXa

Chapter 58

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

“Eh?” Lafarre blinked quickly in confusion, pausing, “You…what?” 

I moved my lips but no words came out, and I could only stiffly shake my head, exhaling out a long breath. He didn’t know the situation between Agares and me. That’s why he obviously couldn’t understand what I had just said.  CUTzOw

Besides, it would have been quite a leap in logic to be able to make a connection between all these situations. Because in the period when Professor Vinogreider was young, my grandfather was only in his twenties, which obviously meant I wasn’t born yet. He made a promise to Agares, the leader of a mythical species; a promise that he didn’t know if he could fulfill—by using his grandson who didn’t exist at the time as a ‘paycheck’ to hand over. Damn it, just thinking it out loud sounds ridiculous! 

Only I would believe that this was the reason for Agares’s unexpected invasion into my wheel of fate, yet despite that, I didn’t want to believe my theory. Not one bit. My guess was that my grandfather had gone crazy in the head, if not, he must have impulsively disregarded the consequences when he made that promise. He definitely didn’t think about how much it would affect my future self, but I couldn’t bring myself to blame a relative who had already passed—because I could still clearly remember how much he had doted on me when I was young. 

He often brought me fishing, rafting and camping, letting me spend a carefree childhood by the coastal shores. Even now, when I look towards the sea, I could still recall his bright and cheery laughter and his gentle palm caressing me. These moments were already engraved into the deepest parts of my mind, something that I would never, ever forget. He was like a father figure to me.  

I didn’t believe that these actions were because he wanted to honour the promise he made, but now that I’m recalling it carefully, some of his actions were indeed strange. Often, he would set off fireworks towards the boundless, vast sea, or he would stop by the bow of the ship and blow his cornett horn, like he was calling out, responding to something. Was he thinking of presenting me to Agares? 

My breath hitched, my mind felt like it had been blown by a sudden gust of strong wind, scattering my line of thought into a complete mess. As Lafarre continued to speak, his words seemed to slip by my ears, not hearing a single word. 

“Desharow!” I woke up from my daze when Lafarre waved his hands in front of my eyes. “So listen, these Nazis probably know about your grandpa’s past, and that’s why they’re eyeing you. You must be very careful, and at the same time, try to make use of this information you got to save your life. You can let them know about the Time Gate, because even if they can enter it, it’ll be hard for them to get out…” 

“Understood, I will.” I let out a deep sigh to compose myself, forcefully withdrawing my dusty thoughts and resting my eyes heavily on Davis’s body. “I will think of a way to preserve my life in order to buy some time for you guys. Those Nazis need me to be able to study Agares, I could use that as a bargaining chip and get Davis a doctor…Wait!” 

As I said this, I couldn’t help but think about my blood all of the sudden. That’s right! I slapped my thigh and immediately rushed to the bed and grabbed onto the coat covering Davis, but then I hesitated again. Eva grabbed my wrist, “Desharow, what are you trying to do?” 1FaH93

“Gonna treat his injuries. I… might have a method to heal him, however, I need you guys to look away for awhile.” I said awkwardly in a low voice, unable to imagine how unsightly the scene of me healing Davis would be, especially in this narrow, cramped cabin with Lafarre and Eva. I couldn’t be more clear about that sort of shame, especially when I had met with the same fate back in the laboratory. I should be grateful that Davis was unconscious, or else he might have wanted to commit suicide. 

As I thought about this, I suddenly remembered about the installed security camera, making my heart thud in my chest. I became aware that if I were to do this, there would be Nazis watching this room. 

“It’s best if you don’t do that,” Lafarre said as he pushed my hand away, his face sullen as he shook his head, motioning me to follow his hand as he brushed over Davis’s face.

 I immediately noticed Davis’s eyelids becoming creased up like a tightly wrung towel. The outline of his enclosed eyeballs were trembling, his face muscles were twitching, and his entire expression was scrunched up, like he was having a nightmare, where he was fighting against demons that were eager to eat him up the second he faltered. GXBAjs

I sucked in a cold breath. Isn’t this a sign of severe PTSD? 

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

In his current state, Davis looked like someone who would be afraid of his own shadow. Like he might die from shock if I woke him up too suddenly from a deep sleep.

“Tbe ecvfgrajcv cbk? Lf cffvr jc jmaeji vbmabg. Llr lcpeglfr jgf jigfjvs tfjilcu, yea tf tjr cfmgbalm alrref lcrlvf…” 

“Djcu, yjcu, yjcu.”  Nl1 mu

Ktfgf kjr j tfjns rfa bo yjculcu ogbw atf batfg rlvf bo atf vbbg, “Gfrtjgbk!” 

Qf tfjgv Etlcf’r nblmf jcv reyrfdefcais atf vbbg kjr qeiifv bqfc ibevis. 

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“Hey, wait a minute!” My body had been roughly dragged out the door before I had time to reply to Lafarre. He hastily dragged me to the other side of the ship and as soon as he turned a corner, we bumped into a group of tall, strong armed men who saluted Rhine. Within the group, a guy with a bald head and tanned skin looked at me and immediately his entire face changed. 

I swept a cold glance at all of them, ohh, I realised that they were the group who watched me beat the crap out of that gorilla-looking dumbass. They ought to look at me with a new level of respect.  1T6gEG

However, I noticed that they were armed with guns and explosives, with a helicopter in the distance ready to take off. Damn it, they must be ready to take over the island.

“Hey, isn’t this the little Russian birdy who pummeled Canoson half to death?” The corner of the bald guy’s mouth twitched upward arrogantly as he measured me up and down with a sinister expression. He extended his hand wanting to touch my face, but I quickly dodged them with a turn of my head. He cast me a grin with teeth showing and said, “Hey, be careful there, buddy.”  

The man easily changed the direction of his hand and went to pinch my neck but was blocked by Rhine. The bald guy’s face immediately scrunched up like he ate something sour, “Captain Rhine, since Colonel Sakarol asked you to interrogate him, you better use that specific set of methods used on prisoners on him and let him get a taste of what our “sweetness” is. Don’t let this pretty face go to waste.” The corner of his mouth drew upwards and he firmly pressed his fist onto Rhine’s chest as he continued, “Canoson was beaten to the point of suffering from severe concussion, even his retina had become detached.”

God, he deserved it. I wanted to say this phrase but I held back and only gave out a disdainful snort. If my hands were free to move, I would have already given baldy a middle finger.    ilB0du

“I’ll handle it. Be careful, don’t fight the merfolk near the water, attack them from as far as you can. They are all crazy beasts.” Rhine turned to look at the helicopter and forced me to walk past them. “Best of luck, ha ha ha.” 

As the sound of footsteps got further, a heavy sense of crisis crept up in my heart and when I was brought towards an extremely dark cabin, I felt all my hair stand on its end. Rhine was drunk. Although he was talking so smoothly just now with his subordinate, what kind of superior would start laughing when warning their men of danger? He’s not just a little tipsy, he’s drunk to high hell. Who would know if he would use this opportunity to do something to me?! 

“Rhine, I want to meet Sakarol! I have to tell her a secret that she’d find extremely interesting!” I yelled anxiously but he turned a deaf ear and pushed me straight into the cabin, slamming the door behind us with a loud thump.

In an instant, everything that laid in the darkness slowly became clearer. I discovered that chains and various kinds of metal torture devices were hanging on the walls. A creepy and chilling feeling shot through my nerves, and I immediately tried to use my free legs to kick up a fuss, however Rhine tightly grabbed onto my arm.  LQqwbG

He pulled out a long chain from the side and attached it to my cuffs, which made my arms hang above my head. Then, he stepped on some sort of mechanism that lifted up my body high up from the ground in an instant by a mechanical force, so quick that a blunt pain shot through both my arms, like it had been dislocated. A scream erupted out of me and I began to gasp for breath. 

“What secret? Why don’t you tell me first? Let me listen and see if you have any more tricks hidden up your sleeves, my little genius.” Rhine lifted my head, his hand caressing my cheek with his rough, burning hot palm. 

His blue eyes were muddy and bloodshot, wisps of blood clouded the white of his eyes, his expression was a mixture of adoration and admiration. I could tell that his emotions were trembling violently like a tightrope being walked on, entirely losing his facade of a loyal lapdog that he had been desperately maintaining. The current him was ten times more dangerous than Sakarol. 

“I promise you that it’s a secret that Sakarol would want to know very much. I can tell you, but I have one condition.” I endured the pain in my arms and clenched my teeth to retain my composure.  oCgUdh

Perhaps using the name of a superior cleared his head a little. He knitted his eyebrows and asked, “What condition?” 

“My friend needs a helping hand and you have an army doctor, right?” I squinted my eyes, panting as sweat heavily dripped down my forehead to my chin. 

Rhine wiped away my sweat with his fingers, then followed the trail of sweat down to my neck before pressing on the collar of my shirt. He fiddled with the buttons as he stared at my dampening chest. 

He was deep in thought before letting out a drunken laugh, “Oh, so it’s actually about this? Are you begging me, Desharow? Then, I have a condition too. In order to get your friend what they need—” As he said that, he undid some of my buttons, “Make love with me and have that pathetic merman listen to us. I want him to hear how I possess you.” He looked askance towards the upper-right corner of the cabin room. Shockingly, there was a black box that had many holes covering its surface. It was a broadcasting station recorder. rHWdsv

“Rhine, have you gone mad?!” I looked at him in shock and anger, knowing that trying to argue and resist would only make him more mad and unrestrained in his drunken state. I could only clench my fist and force myself to ignore him as he undid my clothes and coldly glared at him, “There’s no point in doing that. You want to declare to that beast that I belong to you, right? You think he would be resentful and jealous like you? You’re wrong! He wouldn’t care at all and most likely be excited and treat it like listening to pornography. He’s just… just treating me like a sex object for an unpaid debt. Do you really believe that a beast like him would feel something like… love towards a human? Oh, what a big fucking joke! You don’t understand… only recently I found out I’m just… an object used for compensation in a plot, that’s all.” 

As I started talking, the words that I’ve been restraining inside me were spewing from my mouth like violent waves. I felt like the words I kept blurting out in the moment were rational and full of logic but the deepest parts of my mind bubbled up the image of Agares who was fiercely refuting what I had just said. I could only see his dark eyes watching me in desperation, a voice howling out, saying it’s not like this, it’s not like this!    

Chrysanthemum Garden.

My face showed a painful expression, projecting the conflicting thoughts in my heart. Rhine raised his eyes to look at me, like he felt a little confused. His alcohol-like breath kept hitting me in the face, hugging my waist so tightly that it felt like it was gonna break any moment. His crotch seemed to be burning hot as it stuck onto me, the thing in his pants was already raised but thankfully, it seemed that he still had some rationality left.  

“That’s right, I only found out recently, Rhine.” I shut my eyes, “I’m a compensation item because my family had some sort of dispute with the merfolk. Perhaps Sakarol didn’t inform you, but she must have known. The things that you saw me do from the surveillance camera was because I was enticed. There’s something on the beast that…” I swallowed, feeling that my throat had become a little sore and dry, as if I was trying to say something that went against my heart, making it very difficult, “I was bewitched.”  pGcIVC

My heart tightened, akin to a small beast curling up tightly to protect itself, however I could only continue because I knew that I could use this and gain Rhine’s pity so he wouldn’t eat me whole right now. I was so stupid that I pay attention to how close of a proximity the security camera was supervising on Agares. I also didn’t think that Rhine would have such a strong desire to conquer me.  

“If you… truly like me a little… then….” As I squeezed out these few words, I felt a little sick but I held on. 

To say that Rhine’s feelings towards me was was represented as ‘liking’ then this would be the most extreme and frightening show of ‘like’ in the world, because I could still clearly remember how he pushed me off the boat, throwing me down into the straits full of merfolk, like he was throwing away an obstacle that prevented them from moving forward. However, once he found out I was alive, he became crazy from wanting something he couldn’t have, like Nazis who were chasing an unattainable dream, becoming ballistic and perverted. 

My impression of that charming and easy-going mentor was just one of his many skins, while he was really a Nazi deep down in his bone, a terrorist through and through.  BmopzK

“Stop tormenting me… Rhine, find a doctor for my friend and I’ll thank you for the rest of my life. Really, he’s going to die at any moment.”

I recalled Davis’s trembling eyelids and a hot rush of sadness flooded my nose, making my voice a little rough. 

“Thanking…” Rhine repeated my words, then gave a low laugh. His fingers dug into my hair, parting and combing my messy fringe before gently grasping them again, so that I had to look at him face to face, “I don’t want your thanks, Desharow. I only wish that you would give me a chance, since you said that you don’t feel anything towards that monster, you can accept me, right?”

“Only if you give me a reason to accept you. A doctor, Rhine.” I emphasized hoarsely, eyes red. His alcohol-ridden lips were practically on the tip of my nose, almost making me suffocate.  jbCtW7

“Let me get a taste of you first. I’ve already waited for far too long.” He shut his eyes and held my head like he was holding onto glass, his lips kissing my earlobes. I didn’t have the energy to feel disgusted because the weight of his head on me intensified the pain that I was already feeling having my arms being suspended. My arms felt like they were going to dislocate at any moment because I could hear my bones giving out a creaking sound.

He sighed softly into my ear, “Why were you born Russian? It would have been so much better if you were German. Desharow, in this filthy, complex battlefield where the sun never shines, you’re the purest existence that I have ever met…”

He paused for a bit and caressed my back, “You don’t know but the first time you accompanied me to the Canterbo Caves to investigate, your seriousness and bravery really fascinated me. I couldn’t believe that you had just jumped right in and then created a miracle. There were so many occasions where you amazed me and made my level of respect for you climb higher. I gradually understood that I had no control over you, even as your mentor. That there was no one else who could limit your drive and ambition. The way you chase your dream is something that Germans would really admire. What Sakarol said was correct, you are indeed a beautiful moth, people can’t help but want to hold on to you who is flying so high…”  

He took in a breath and gave another drunken laugh, “If not, you’ll fly away, fly so far away, where nobody in a lifetime could even catch up to you.” UShGBs

“You aren’t catching me…” My wrists were shaking in the handcuffs, the friction of the ice-cold metal stung unbearably. “You want to break my wings and turn me into a flightless insect, wiggling around helplessly in the palm of your hands, praying to have your mercy and love. You enjoy that feeling, don’t you? Rhine, that’s what you want to do to me. Don’t describe yourself… as someone so deeply full of love.”  

I turned my face away in contempt, my piercing eyes as sharp as a nail. “Come on, if you want to ruin me then bring it on, but you will never be able to see that moth you desperately want to catch, or… you can just try and let me have a reason to be grateful to you.”

Rhine was stumped for words, his eyes dark and gloomy like there was a layer of cobwebs clouding them, making it unclear. I could tell that his drunkenness was getting worse, that his brain was not fully awake and that his heart was swaying a little.

At this moment, I was thankful that his feelings towards me weren’t purely lust. If he was sober, he may not really do anything to me. He was unwilling to use pure strength to subdue me because it would just prove that he really couldn’t beat the hormones of a beast. Rhine was fundamentally a conqueror, wanting me to obey him through and through, to love and worship him, just that it was one hell of a foolish dream from the get go.  zBgk9y

“I’ll find a doctor for your friend and let him receive the best medical care… However, Desharow,” Rhine breathed roughly and heavily, his hand twisting and playing with my earlobes, “Answer me, once they are done with building the base, you have to come back with me to Germany, become a citizen and marry me. And from now on, you must never approach that merman ever again, can you do that?”  

“Marriage?” I was so shocked that my mouth was left hanging open. The Nazi persecution of homosexuality during World War II was appalling and this guy here could actually play such horrifying joke with me. Thank God that it isn’t the Second World War right now, if not he’ll have damned me to those scary concentration camps!  

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“Yes, marriage. We don’t restrict homosexuality like you Russians do. Although it’s currently still not made legal, but in the future…” He murmured, falling into his own excited imagination,“I can’t wait to make you my little groom, Desharow, you can’t go back to Russia anymore. I had entrusted someone to wipe out records of all your student registration and residential permits. You are no longer a Russian now. You are now someone with no nationality and would soon be slowly forgotten as years go by.

It felt like a heavy hammer had hit me on the head and stunned me stupid. My mind spun for half a day before I slowly comprehended this frightening truth. Rhine had stolen away my chance to continue studying at the university, he had destroyed my dream and erased my existence, uprooting me from Russia and turning me into a footless bird incapable of landing, so that I could be led by him like a kite.  liouHA

“No… no, no! What did you do, why did you do something like that?! You mad dog, mad dog! I want to kill you!”

I hysterically kicked him over and over again, however, he was tightly holding onto my legs, restraining them and the excruciating pain in my arms made me unable to continue exerting any strength. The sound of the metal chains banging was like an explosion to my ears, making my head dizzy. I could hear Rhine asking me over and over again, ” Do you accept me, Desharow? I love you so much, it’s turning me insane!” 

“Get lost, you son of a bastard! You’re worse than dog shit, fucking lunatic!” I rained down curses on him, powerless, the calmness that I tried to maintain crumbled down in an instant. The second Rhine reached for my belt with trembling hands, I knew that I was done for. 

However, the moment he took off my pants, I suddenly heard a bunch of messy electrical crackles that made me shudder and held onto my breath. Wb0tR3

“Rhine, calling for Rhine!” Sakarol’s voice rang from his pocket. Only God would know that this was the first time I felt relief at hearing that demon’s voice. “Bring Desharow over, this merman suddenly went mad for no reason. Stop the interrogation, I command you to bring Desharow over here this instant!” 

“Looks like your superior has stopped me from agreeing to your conditions for the time being.” 

My voice trembled

Thanks to Sakarol, I was able to get away from Rhine’s evil clutches. Just as I was being brought back to the bottom compartment again, I couldn’t help but feel like I had obtained amnesty. Both my legs were a little soft, like I was stepping on air and floating away to the sky. My mind was full of the memories of my warm home, my parent’s food, and the exciting and emotional years learning in the university, my beloved classmates and teachers, all those that would now turn into a dream, soon dispersing in the wind like dust.   JTasCd

My soul seemed to have been drawn out from my body, my heart feeling empty, my body becoming as fragile as thin ice, hearing the crackling when you step on it. 

I was brought to Sakarol without saying anything. She indifferently swept over the bruises on my wrist and took out a key to unlock the shackles and nonchalantly said, “I saw that merman mutilating himself when I looked at the surveillance monitor just now. I have to trouble you to calm him down please, little Desharow. He’s also refusing to eat anything so you’ll have to feed him, too. We have to ensure that he keeps living.” 

After saying that, she handed me a bucket filled with sardines and gave me a fake smile. 

I took it without a word and went into the cabin. It was only after my line of sight followed the hatched door shut and my mind clearing up did the word Sakarol said clicked—Agares was harming himself. oceMUN

Once I saw Agares’s appearance, my hands started trembling and the bucket nearly fell to the ground. His wrists were no longer suspended on both sides of his head as before, but were lowered to the shoulders. The thick chains connected to the metal gears at the top were pulled off it’s rail by Agares and both of his wrists had extremely deep, white bruises that caved in. His flesh was protruding out and his blue blood was thickly clotted around his wrists that it looked like wristbands, piling by the shackles.  

“Desharow…” Agarese locked his eyes on me through his matted hair. His hand struggled to move, carrying the shackles with his movement,  “Come…I…”  He spoke out broken Russian syllables, seeming as though he was thinking hard to express something but didn’t know how to combine the words for it. 

I was hit with a sudden realisation. It was because he had heard the entire conversation between Rhine and me, that he thought of self-mutilating to struggle free and get out. This realisation made me stagger a step or two before throwing myself to embrace Agares’s body. My hands clutched his thick hair tightly, then I closed my eyes and buried my face into his neck, deeply inhaling his scent. 

  XwH FV

TBC

notthepineapple: Just wanted to say a big congrats to Cheonsa for DM’s one year anniversary! And a big thank you to both Cheonsa and Jade for continuing to share Desharow’s adventure with us!

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